Chapter 10.
As summer arrived with its hot sun, business at the Barkley Ranch and all the local ranches also heated up with hiring help for harvests and for the upcoming cattle roundup.
As the work increased, the population of Stockton swelled, mostly with men. There were frequent dances and social events to keep them occupied and out of trouble. Emily continued to avoid crowded social affairs despite Nick's repeated invitations. She assumed he attended some, maybe most, of these events.
On a warm evening in early July, Nick took the buggy on a detour on the way to bringing Emily home and stopped at a clearing to watch the late sunset and watch the stars appear.
Emily always enjoyed, and looked forward to, the buggy rides home in the evening when she and Nick were alone without distractions and often enough wine and whisky within to ease whatever tensions remained between them. These were times when the talking flowed gently and they shared and learned about each other.
Emily came to understand the depth of Nick's loyalty to family and not just the family as a whole or as an empire but his care and consideration for each individual who belonged to it. She learned about his love for dancing, for any physicality really, his deep disdain for pretense, particularly moral pretense and hypocrisy. And she teased him gently for his agnosticism while also believing in common superstition.
He shared with her his past loves and hurts and included in this his brief engagement to Hester. She told him how she knew Hester and that she was relieved the engagement was broken, remarking that she felt such a marriage would have been far more miserable for him than for Hester.
Emily answered Nick's questions, telling him her favorite book was "Jane Eyre" by Charlotte Bronte, her favorite color was cornflower blue but she didn't have a favorite flower. He tried to get her name one favorite flower but she could only narrow it down to delphiniums and peonies. She told him how she spent her earlier childhood, during the war years, with her mother's family in northern Ohio and that they were Quakers who had helped slaves escape to Canada.
Her favorite time of day was dusk because of the shades of blue it created. "Like your eyes," he had commented. He learned she had a strong faith in God and not much in religion. And that she wanted to believe in ghosts.
On this night, Nick and Emily were both leaning back in the buggy, their feet resting on the front board, when Nick voiced his disappointment in Emily's continued reluctance to attend a dance with him. "I don't like going by myself," he stated.
"I'm sure you're not alone once you get there," Emily said confidently.
"That's not the point!" he said, "I'd like to have someone on my arm when I arrive."
"Why don't you ask Margaret Linehart?" she suggested. Margaret was a pretty brunette, rather bland, but Emily liked her.
Nick shook his head.
"Emmaline Grafton?" Emmaline was a quick-witted blond, lovely girl.
Again, he shook his head.
"Susannah Ahern! She would love to be escorted by you."
Nick groaned in response, which brought a small laugh from Emily.
Emily studied the colors in the twilight sky and couldn't understand why Nick would be so hesitant to ask a girl to a dance.
Then she suddenly took her feet off the front board and planted them on the floorboard, sitting up straight.
"All right then," she stated firmly, "Take me to the dance. Now. Tonight. But you'll have to answer to any rumors that start."
Nick grabbed the reins and quickly got the buggy moving again towards town.
"What kind of rumors are you thinking people will start?" he asked.
"That Nick Barkley and Emily Powell are in a serious romance," she answered.
Nick didn't quite know how to respond because he thought they were in a serious romance
The dance was an outdoor affair and less boisterous than Emily anticipated. She made sure to take Nick's arm and stayed very close to him as they approached the party.
Initially, she thought no one had noticed until she saw Susannah dancing past them. The girl did a double take and she was not smiling. Emily also noticed a few young ladies off to the side, talking among themselves, and casting frequent looks at her and Nick.
The familiar knot in Emily's stomach was getting larger and when Nick finished talking with his friend, she said, "Nick, please dance with me now." She would have preferred leaving but the damage was already done.
She loved the dancing and of course she loved the music, all fiddles and polkas and happy. And maybe she didn't fully understand the rules of dances Out West but when Nick allowed an unknown cowboy to cut in and dance with her, a fresh wave of panic set in.
The girls continued to stare and talk to each other and Emily danced several dances, each one with a different man.
When, after an eternity, Nick stepped in to dance with her, he had only to look at her face and he said, "I'll take you home when this dance is over, okay?" She nodded her head and held him a little tighter.
She was relieved but also disappointed with herself that her anxiety had been that evident to him; she thought she had done a good job of looking happy.
She was acutely aware of being watched as Nick led her away and helped her into the buggy, and they drove off alone together.
Emily silently reprimanded herself for behaving in a manner unbecoming of a widow: Dancing merrily with all those men! Not to mention the talk which was surely stirring after she arrived, and departed, on Nick's arm.
"What's wrong? Nick asked, rather harshly.
"Nothing. Nothing's wrong."
"Uh-huh," He wasn't buying it.
"Did you have a good time tonight, Nick?" she asked brightly.
"I did! I think I was the envy of every man there," he looked at her, smiling.
""Good!" she said and smiled, pleased to have made him happy.