Chapter 33

Everyone at the station had noticed John was quieter than normal. He wasn't totally withdrawn or anything just quiet, just quiet enough that the phantom was held at bay. The day had been quiet with only three minor runs for the squad and two trash fires for the engine. The men were now gathering in the kitchen for coffee before Marco started lunch.

"I have to laugh at the thoughts of that old man," Chet was chuckling to himself as he waited in line with his coffee cup.

"Well you got to give the old guy credit for thinking. If the one dumpster couldn't handle the smoldering cigar butts he should put them in the other one." Cap shook his head as he sipped on his cup of coffee while the rest of his crew filled their cups. "I guess that's pretty sound thinking for a ninety three year old man with dementia, trying to hide his cigars from his granddaughter."

"How long do you think it will be until we're called back there, Cap," Mike joked, now enjoying his cup of coffee. They were all slightly giggling at the situation when Marco noticed Johnny sitting off by himself and brought him to everyone's attention with a silent jerk of his head.

As they watched their crewman sitting in a chair turned to face the chalkboard, it was clear that his mind was a million miles away. They all smiled as they took in the calm, but deeply thoughtful look on John's face as he stared at the chalk board but was clearly not seeing it, and toyed with his wedding band, twisting it back and forth on his finger with his other hand.

Still smiling five men slowly and quietly moved over near their friend and bent down to look at the chalkboard from his angle, causing him to stir at the invasion of his personal space.

"What?" John asked as he turned his head to take in his crewmates and noticed they were all eyeing him over good. "Have I grown a second head or something?" He inquired with a noticeable amount of annoyance.

"Well Gage, I wouldn't say you have a second head but there is something different." Chet started baiting his pigeon.

"I'm afraid I've got to agree with Chet here. There is definitely something," Roy added as he pushed a fresh cup of coffee in the direction of his partner. "For as long as I've known you I don't think I've ever seen you like this."

"Like what?" Johnny demanded clearly not hearing what was being said as a compliment.

"I don't know," Roy admitted. "I'm not sure there's a word for it."

"All I got to say is you got it bad this time amigo," Marco made his attempt. "I didn't think it was possible for you to be so… s…"

"So, what?" John was growing less agitated but still asking for what his crewmates were seeing that was bringing about the invasive stares. He himself was hoping they would find the words for what he was feeling.

"I don't think I've ever seen you so calm and at peace," Mike gave his words to what he was watching. "You're not just happy, it's… it's clearly a whole lot deeper than I've ever seen you before. Elise must really be something else."

John's eyes began to pool as a quivering crooked smile graced his face. He turned his attention to the wedding ring on his finger and really looked at it before he managed a nod of his head in response to Mike's observation.

"How are things going at home?" Hank entered the conversation. "Is Elise still nervous about the next surgery?"

"She doesn't talk about it much," John turned and leaned on his elbows at the table, still toying with his ring. "But I can tell that she's still working on getting everything in order in case things don't go well."

"I'm sure it's just a whole lot easier than just sitting around thinking about things." Cap offered a perspective that he felt based on his limited dealings with Elise. "Even if all goes as well as you hope, she's not going to feel up to doing much for a few days. I'm sure she's just trying to be prepared."

"Yeah, I know JoAnne does the same thing when ever she's planning to be away for even an evening. She makes sure the fridge is full of food I only have to warm up, even though she knows I can cook for myself," Roy added, gaining a smile from his partner,

"Yeah, And every time I'd get out of the hospital she loads up my refrigerator too." John added. "Now I've got Elise." John looked around to his crewmates, spending a little extra time with Roy and Cap. "And she's loading the refrigerator and freezer for while she's going to be in the hospital."

"She is looking forward to the reception?" Hank questioned, trying to steer the conversation to something positive.

"Yeah, she is." John sat up straighter and looked to his captain. Then the conversation stopped again as John moved from playing with his ring to toying with his coffee cup.

"How's this new farmer's market going to affect your horse ranch?" Chet asked. The quiet was driving him totally nuts.

"Not. Not at all, It's not on the ranch that's just next to it." John looked to Chet with a shrug of his head.

"I thought all that land around your private station was your ranch?" Chet questioned.

"NO, um, only a little over nineteen and a half acres… that's the most I can maintain if… um… on my current income." John managed to once again avoid admitting the possibility that Elise might not survive her next ordeal intact. "The rest she's planning to put into some kind of a park or something. She's still getting the geological surveys to find out what the land is suitable for."

Again the conversation stopped and again there was silence as everyone continued to look on the new countenance of John Gage.

This time the silence was disrupted by the sound of the klaxons and the crew responded to a familiar address, knowing they would find a familiar old man still trying to hide his cigars.

This time however, when they arrived, the fire wasn't in one of the several dumpsters on the property but in the apartment draperies. The old man's granddaughter had given in and let him smoke on the patio and he had used the window sill to rest his lit cigar on, touching off the curtains as they touched the lit end.

He had managed to get a burn on his hand trying to put the fire out so John and Roy took him into the hospital. When they stepped out of the treatment room they found the granddaughter talking with Dr. Brackett and tearfully admitting that she didn't think she could handle taking care of her grandfather any more.

Once they replaced some supplies, Roy and John made their way to the squad, and when Roy climbed in behind the wheel, he looked over to John. It didn't take him long to realize that his partner's thoughts were on Elise.

"I tell you what," Roy spoke. "When we get back to the station, give your wife a call. It'll make you feel better."

"You know Roy," John began to speak as the squad was making its way back to the station. "What Mike said, you know, earlier? About me being at peace..."

"I remember," Roy countered.

"Do I really look that way?"

"Yeah. Yeah you do, especially when you're off in a word all your own and don't realize we're watching you."

"So why do you guys have to watch me so much?" John countered.

"It's just so different; it's nice to see you so happy… peaceful. It's fun to watch."

There was a moment of silence as they made their way along the road, "You know it's always been that way between me and Elise." John broke the silence again. "Even when we agreed to just be friends she was always good for me. Whenever we talked and no matter what we talked about she helped me put my life into perspective and I always knew if I had a bad run she could get me through it faster than any one… even you. She'd call me when she had a bad day too and I always felt better when we talked; even when I was suppose to be helping her. It's always been that way with her.

When we got married… you know it was kind of a spur of the moment thing. I don't regret it but I really didn't think about it for a long time, if you know what I mean."

"Yeah, I know what you mean. I found out after the fact, remember?" Roy commented, but managed to hide the hurt he was still feeling at being left out.

"When we're together it's not like with anyone I've ever been with. You guys say I look so calm but she's so exciting… so totally amazing! When we're apart all I can think about is getting back together again. And it's not just in bed. I love watching her look over papers and files, and when she cooks, and when we work together around the ranch. She still has to be careful but she's getting stronger every day and my whole world is like this totally unbelievable fairy tale right now." John leaned back on the seat and turned his attention out the windshield.

"Roy? How long does this last, when does reality finally kick in? Don't get me wrong this is great, but it can't last like this forever. Can it?"

Roy gave his questioning partner a quick glance and then turned back to the road to think on his answer. "If you're lucky this is reality. The excitement you're feeling will change in time as you grow together but if you're really meant to be together and are willing to work together, it only gets better."

00000

The day of the reception finally came and, as was agreed, John arrived early in the afternoon, with Elise to be tucked into a guest room for a nap.

But just like any other kid on a big day, there was no way she was able to sleep and they soon found her at their sides, helping to string decorations. John pulled her off a ladder twice, and just before she was to get dressed she had a seizure. John just simply sat on the ground next to her until the seizure was finished and then he scooped her up in his arms and carried her inside so she would be out of sight before the guests started to arrive.

As soon as they had supervised the placement of the wedding cake, JoAnne and Emily moved in to help Elise get dressed and John was not so gently guided out of the room and the door shut in his face. The door was opened again two minutes later and a garment bag containing John's clothes was thrust in his hands, and then the door shut once again.

As he stood in the hall way outside of Elise's room, trying to decide where he should go, two sets of strong hands were placed on his shoulders and John was guided to the master bedroom by his captain and his partner.

After a quick shower John toweled off and slipped into clean underwear before stepping out of the bathroom to see Roy unzip the garment bag, revealing an outfit he treasured but had not long ago been ashamed to let anyone see him wear.

As Roy pulled the hanger from the bag with a stunned look on his face, Hank watched the reverent and thoughtful look on John's face as he reached past Roy to touch some of the beading on the white buck skin jacket which was complete with fringe.

"This is the outfit my grandmother made for my father when he and my mother were married." John explained as he pulled the pants from under the jacket and began to pull them on and lace them to his body.

Hank and Roy had helped him into his jacket with his bare chest showing through the latching down the front of it. The next step was the moccasins, followed by cuffs of feathers and metal cone shaped bells that were tied around his lower calves. Last but not least, John stood before a full length mirror and pulled a white buck skin leather headband, with decorative beading sewn to it, around his forehead and tied it in place with thin leather straps before fluffing his hair around it.

After a deep breath was taken in and slowly let out, John turned and held his hands out to his side for his friends to inspect him.

"Wow," Roy let out a deep sigh. "I knew you were from the reservation but I never expected to see you dressed like this."

"All I've got to say is it's a good thing you're taken because that outfit is going to turn a few heads out there." Hank added as he started dusting off the shoulders with his hands.

The inspection was ended by a knock on the bedroom door. "Daddy?" Hank's daughter called through the closed door. "There's a man here that needs to know where the fire bowl needs to go."

"That must be the representative from the tribal council," John jumped to attention.

"I'll take care of it." Hank stepped toward the door before turning back to DeSoto. "You take care of him."

"Oh, and daddy, the Chaplain is here too and the guy with the music needs to know where to plug in his amps." Hank's daughter started rattling off as soon as the door was opened. Roy and John listened to the list continue as the voices grew softer as they walked farther away.

John started pacing in the room, adding a little bounce to his step that would ring the bells around his calves.

Roy, sharing his nervousness, also shared a smile. "Elise is a very lucky lady."

"No Roy, I'm the lucky one. You have no idea what she left to be with me." John spoke as he continued to walk.

"Her head dress will be full of silver eagle feathers awarded because of her labors among our people on the reservation. She is so out of my league."

"From what I've seen she doesn't feel that way. When she looks at you she sees her whole world and every dream she's ever had come true. And it shows in her eyes."

The bedroom door swung open again and Hank came through followed by a man also in Indian regalia. "John, this guy needs to talk to you." Hank explained before turning around and leaving again. "I've got to find some more fuses and extension cords."

John began speaking with the newcomer in a language Roy didn't understand and walked out the door with him leaving Roy to follow as they walked to John's Rover and John pulled a zippered plastic bag out of the back and handed it to the man he had been talking to.

When John had concluded his business, Roy stood next to him and looked around. The street was lined with cars and large groups of people… mostly firefighters and their dates or family members, who were making their way from the school just around the corner where parking had been arranged. Mike, Chet and Marco, with the aid of Chris DeSoto, were all dressed in their best suits, standing at the gate to the back yard and directing people to whatever seating was still available while also taking from them the brightly colored packages that they carried.

"I think we better go see if Elise is about ready," John spoke, and once again Roy was following along, wondering just what his role was.

John was standing outside the room Elise was in, talking through the door. JoAnne and Emily were telling him it was bad luck to see the bride before the wedding and John just kept telling them that they were already married.

Hank interrupted once again as he lead the just arrived Rachel and her two charges, along with the aunt and uncle that had raised Elise, to the bridal chamber. It didn't take Roy and John long to realize they needed to help entertain young Cody and Tobias, who were very impressed with John's regalia.

John was just straightening Tobias's tie and the shoulders of his slightly too large suit coat when an aged Indian walked into the living room where they were with the aid of a very crooked and ornately hand carved walking stick. He wore a nice western style suit coat over a white shirt, decorated by a turquoise and silver bolo tie. His hair was salt and pepper gray, nearly shoulder length, with a long small braid down one side. His face was weathered and tan, with the look of business about him.

John looked up and noticed the stare centered on him, and quickly rose to his feet and stood at attention before Elise's Uncle.

"Mr. Blackhorse, Sir," Johnny greeted with a slight bow.

The seasoned man's gaze went to John's feet and slowly worked its way upward. "You related to Roderick Gage of the Lakota Nation?"

"Yes sir, he was my Uncle." John answered. This was not something to be proud of. His uncle was most known for his drunken and abusive ways. John himself had been taken from his custody as a teen and still bore the scars of the abuse on his back.

"I know the man," Uncle Milton looked over John and John feared his rejection. That was the last thing he wanted here and now. This man's disapproval wouldn't change the fact that he and Elise were married, nor did John think Elise would leave him based on her uncle's feelings, but it would not do well for the mood of this reception and John so wanted today to be perfect for Elise.

"You've done well for yourself in spite of him." Uncle Milton stated, and John began to relax just a little while reaching out to shake hands with his in-law. Uncle Milton once again gave John a serious looking over and, instead of taking the offered hand, he spoke.

"This will not do at all." He then leaned on his walking stick and looked through the kitchen and down to the back yard where the representative from the Indian council was making the final touches to the fire bowl. "I shall return." He said, and left by way of the kitchen door.

"I guess you haven't won him over yet." Roy commented as he followed Uncle Milton with his eyes, "Should have asked his permission to marry Elise first I guess."

"There was no time to ask anyone's permission accept Elise's," Johnny walked around to get a better look at the conversation taking place between the Native Americans in the back yard.

Moments later, Johnny watched his uncle in-law return with the representative in tow and anxiously awaited their arrival while preparing himself not to make a scene.

When the two men reached the house, Uncle Milton peeled off and headed to where Elise was finishing getting dressed and returned a moment later carrying a small leather bag.

Those who had been in the room with Elise were lined up behind the man and as they reached the living room, they all fanned out revealing Elise in her white buckskin dress and knee high moccasins lined with white rabbit's fur. The dress was simpler than others Johnny had seen not covered with nearly as much bead-work, but around her neck was a beautiful custom necklace that symbolically told of her work among the people of Montana. As Elise's eyes met John's a smile graced her lips and tears pooled in her eyes while Uncle Milton motioned for him to kneel before him and began to chant in the Lakota language of John's youth. Before the chanting was completed, three real eagle feathers had been tucked into John's head band as statements to the bravery and honor John demonstrated in his life and chosen profession. He would go into this reception as an honored Lakota brave.

Once the feathers were securely tucked in his headband, John raised his face to look at the man who had so honored him. Uncle Milton then reached down and took hold of John's right arm by the elbow and John returned the grip on Uncle Milton's elbow as he was pulled to his feet.

"I have heard a great deal about you, John Gage." Uncle Milton spoke with a tone of authority. "Even that which was spoken in anger and against you told of your great honor and bravery. I believe I finally have family who will not be ashamed to accept me."

"I am grateful for the care you gave to the woman who has become my wife," Johnny responded, realizing he was being accepted and welcomed by this part of Elise's family. "I am honored to call you my kin."

Uncle Milton then took Elise's hand and pulled her toward John, placing her hand in his before tying the two together with a thin leather strap as a sign of his approval before taking his leave with his wife and Rachel following behind. Rachel took the time to gather her charges as they left. Emily and JoAnne made one last attempt to make sure every one of Elise's hairs were in place and her jewelry was on straight before JoAnne took hold of Roy's elbow and followed Emily out the door to claim their seats.

For a moment the bride and groom just stood in the living room looking into each other's eyes, basking in the feel of the leather strap around their hands and knowing of its symbolic meaning. That was where they were standing when Hank came running in to find out where they were and declared that everyone was waiting for them.

Keeping their hands tied together, John placed his other arm around Elise's shoulders and together they walked down the steps from the back deck to the top of an isle between folding chairs. Instead of some piano playing the wedding march in the background, a drum started beating and the representatives of the Native American nations started chanting in Lakota. Those chanting included Uncle Milton and his wife and before they reached the fire bowl that was now blazing, John and Elise were quietly chanting along.

The Native American Blanket Ceremony was performed in the Lakota language so there were very few in the gathered friends and family that understood what was happening as they watched the couple stand together. Individual blankets were taken from their shoulders and a single blanket was draped around the two of them together.

When that was done, the department Chaplain stepped forward and explained that John and Elise were legally married in the eyes of the law but that they had chosen to enter into a spiritual union also. The Bride and Groom were invited to have someone stand with them as John turned to Roy, inviting him to his side with a glance of trust, and Elise gave a similar look to Rachel.

When the two were once again announced as Husband and Wife the sun was just setting in the western horizon. The lights decorating the back yard came on in all their glory and the flashbulbs on more cameras than either of them ever thought would be there started to blind the bride and Groom, but worse yet they were aggravating Elise's condition as she started to tense up in John's arms.

John quickly pulled Elise into his shoulder and turned to protect her from the flashes, "Kill the flashbulbs, now!" John called, as he made sure his arm protected her eyes.

John had managed to bring a stop to the flashes and Hank was quick to explain that the flashbulbs were hurting the bride's eyes. There were enough good photos of the two in their costumes to fill a photo album but there would only be professional photo's taken for the rest of the evening, and that photographer was well aware that no flash was to reach the bride's eyes.

Chairs were moved off to the edges of the lawn as guests gathered and congratulated the couple. Dancing soon commenced and John never once let anyone cut in with his bride. He was picking up on her tension and slight tremors in her hands and feared a seizure was working its way in and he didn't trust anyone but himself to care for her if that happened.

After they had been dancing for nearly twenty minutes, the disk jockey controlling the music, a fellow fireman who did this sort of thing on the side, came running out onto the dance floor and clipped a new fangled cordless microphone to Elise's dress before returning to his mic and explaining that he could hear the bride singing along with the music and wanted everyone else to hear too.

Both Elise and John blushed as more attention turned to them than they had wanted. The music continued and then a song was played that Elise did begin to sing along with. Her voice was far from professional. It was soft and quiet even with the microphone. She cracked on the high notes but her song was for John and he accepted it with a moist smile and a deaf hear for the imperfections.

Where do I begin
To tell the story
Of how great a love can be
The sweet love story
that is older than it seems
The simple truth about
the love he brings to me
Where do I start
Like the summer rain
That cools the pavement
With a patent leather shine
He came into my life
and made the living fine
And gave a meaning to
this empty world of mine
He fills my heart
He fills my heart
With very special things
With angel songs
With wild imaginings
He fills my soul
With so much love
And anywhere I go
I'm never lonely
With him along
Who could be lonely
I reach for his hand
It's always there
How long does it last
Could love be measured by the
hours in the day
I have no answers now
But this much I can say
I'm going to need him
'til the stars all run away
And he'll be there

Hank Stanley found his lineman leaning on the rail of the deck looking out on all that was taking place and stepped up to his side.

"Chet, I thought you'd be down there checking out all the nurses that are left wondering what they've missed out on."

Chet smirked at his captain's joke and turned his attention back to his favorite pigeon as he danced and listened to Elise's voice. "Do you think John even knows we're here?"

"I think he must or they'd have headed for the bedroom a long time ago," Hank answered.

"So what do we need to do now to get them through this next surgery she has to have?" Chet asked with a resolve that Hank wasn't sure was there before now.

"Be there for them," Hank answered, "It's going to be touch and go for a while and there's no guarantee for what to expect when she comes out of it." "Right now she's worried about someone being there for John."

"She does seem to worry about him, doesn't she?"

"But for here and now, let's eat, drink, dance and be happy. Tomorrow's another day… we'll deal with it when it gets here."

Author's notes:

This is the end of this part. The story has so much more to tell that it's time to start a second story. Watch for the continuation in "May I have this Dance."