Chapter 17.
Ruth was laid to rest a few days later. After the funeral, Nick pulled Emily aside to tell her how grateful Heath was for her help.
Indeed, she'd been sleeping at the house since Ruth died. She knew she couldn't take the place of Sarah's mother but she remembered how very alone she felt after Sam died and how comforting it had been to have someone, anyone, simply nearby.
Emily also knew the haunted, sorrowful, look in Sarah's eyes because she had seen it in her own. Losing a mother is not the same as losing a husband but Emily understood, as only those who have grieved understand, that every death, every loss, brings with it a darkness so bleak and so unfathomable that human life is the only thing that can light the way out. Sometimes, it takes a long time to see it.
So she stayed near Sarah, never asking, and never telling, allowing for Sarah to come to her if and when she needed her.
Heath came every day and it was then that Emily would slip out to do errands for Sarah and for herself.
Several days after the funeral, Heath arrived in the buggy, leading Blackie, and Nick on Coco alongside him. They had decided, at Victoria's suggestion, that a day out and away from the house was what was needed.
Sarah needed a little cajoling but agreed to go at Emily's urging and so the four of them left town for the sake of leaving town.
They stopped in a small but sunny dale and ate from the picnic Silas had packed. The heat from the midday sun warmed the little valley, taking off the winter chill, and brightening the colors all around as though to confirm that the sun does not know sorrow.
Heath and Sarah went for a walk together and when they were out of sight, Nick asked Emily how she was doing.
"I'm sad, so sad for Sarah. I hardly knew Ruth but I remember the pain I felt after Sam died and my heart breaks for her." Emily's own grief started to spill forth with the verbal acknowledgement and, try as she may, she was not able to stop her own tears. She hadn't cried in a long time and now, suddenly, a fresh new wave of sorrow washed over her.
Nick watched wordlessly as a few tears slipped down her cheeks and she wiped them away with the backs of her hands. Then he looked away and said, "I'm sorry."
Emily recovered quickly and redirected to conversation to happier things They talked in subdued tones about things like Christmas plans, Audra and Carl, and Glory the Mustang's foal, due in about a month.
Heath and Sarah returned to the buggy, arm in arm, and Emily noted a look pass between the brothers.
On the way back to town, Heath and Sarah shared their plans to marry before the end of the month, possibly New Year's Eve. Given her state of mourning as well as Heath and Sarah's natural inclinations, they were keeping their plans quiet: Only Nick and Emily were to know and only Nick and Emily, they knew, could be trusted with this confidence.
Heath took Sarah home in the buggy. Emily had returned to sleep in her own home only the night before and while they rode through the town to her shop, neither Emily nor Nick said a word but it was a thoughtful, comfortable silence.
They had seen little of each other during Ruth's illness and, while Emily was occupied with the duties of friendship, Nick found he missed her company.
Emily accepted Nick's invitation to go riding the following Monday. She wanted, even needed, to chase the wind with Blackie. Nick just wanted to be alone with Emily.