November passed in monotonous succession and I was at odds with myself over Anna.
On one hand, I knew that my feelings for her were useless. No only as a vampire, but as another girl.
She and I both blatantly checked out boys, giggled over them in the hallways in our own quiet way, even pursued a few of them in our idle time.
I don't know if I seemed distant, I never had a head for that, especially in regards to boys, but they didn't appreciate my flirtations as much as they did Anna's.
But on the other hand, Anna got less amusement from their attention than I did, usually reading a book instead.
I think I pursued boys so much to prove to myself that I didn't really feel this way about Anna, but I found no true joy in the pursuit, mostly because I spent so much time looking for The Earl in each of them.
I didn't expect to find him, but I enjoyed giving in to the self-illusion that I would.
Somehow, Anna was exempt from this search. Perhaps it was due to gender, or perhaps it was because she bore a semblance to him in her fierce spirit, either way I felt no less confused by the end of November as I was at the beginning.
On the 28th, I received a letter from the Ministry, giving me my orders for Winter break.
Anna was with me in the hallway when I read the letter. My faced must have become quite changed, because she asked me what was wrong, but I said nothing.
I just hoped the Ministry was misinformed.
.oOo.
It was the first of December, quickly approaching the anniversary of my Turning, a blanket of pure white snow covering the grounds of Hogwarts like a blanket of down.
There is one thing that people must understand about 12th century Gothic castles, and that is that they are, without exception, drafty and cold in the winter. Yes, even parts of Hogwarts are so.
I, of course, stopped feeling small fluctuations in temperature when I Died, so I wasn't as sensitive to it as Anna, who walked irresolutely beside me in her charmingly stubborn way, despite the cloud of breath that hung before her face like a sliver veil.
"How the hell do you do it?" She asked, rubbing her gloved hands together as I opened the door to the Charms classroom.
"Do what?" I muttered, my mind still dwelling on the letter I had received just days before.
"You're completely unaffected by the cold…" Anna said with a tone of bitter humor, slamming her book bag down on the desk and tightening her blue and bronze striped scarf. I loved it when she wore blue. It made her face seem even more delicate.
"You seem happy." I said, dropping my bag on the floor with the same mercy she had shown hers. For me, this was normal behavior, but for her…her precious books were in there…
Anna heaved a heavy sigh, more silvery breath gathering around her face. She sat down, digging in her bag and producing an envelope. I took it from her, casually pulling out the letter. It was from her parents.
"They're going on holiday to New York." She said bitterly. I frowned, handing her the letter back.
I felt sad for her. I knew that this was an important holiday for Muggles, centered around family. I could see the hurt in her eyes, I could almost feel it. I knew that feeling of rejection.
"I wish I could do something."
"Will you be staying here over Holiday?"
I frowned. "Sorry…wish I was…" I muttered darkly. I couldn't leave her here alone, it wasn't what a friend would do. But I couldn't just let the Sanguarians of Rome run rampant, especially since the situation down there was getting out of hand. It was my job. Taking her with me would have been too dangerous…
Professor Flitwick entered, and we were forced to pause our conversation until the end of class. I could not focus on my lessons that day: my mind moving at the speed of light, ever searching for a solution to Anna's problem.
By the end of class, Anna looked as if she had sank further into despair, and by extension, so was I. Though she walked with a straight back and her normal, slightly haughty expression, there was a hidden look of loss in her beautiful green eyes.
I vowed that If I made it back from Rome alive, I would surprise her.
.oOo.
A few days later, I stole away form Hogwarts, scattering Dementors like shadows form sunlight as I swooped past them, flying through the still December air on my great webbed wings. For a small time, I was a monster, I was a true Vampire. I was free.
I hadn't visited the crypt in Hogsmead since the Earl had been murdered by Death Eaters, and setting foot in that cemetery nearly broke my heart anew. The cemetery had not changed much over the years, the old headstones looking like broken black teeth sticking out of the snow. It was silent, save for the hooting of an owl and the occasional, distant howl from a wolf. The crypt stood silent, the tree that grew beside it having grown considerably since I had last been here.
I entered it, descending the stairs in deferential silence, remembering all the times I had gone down those stairs with the Earl, our lips wet with blood and our veins full from the hunt. Those had been comfortable times, beautiful, charming times…
I entered the large burial chamber, it's once elaborate velvet draping now riddled with mold and dust. In the gloom, I could make out the tarnished silver chalices we had once drank blood from, everywhere I looked a forgotten extravagance. I felt remorse as I sat silently in one of the plush chintz chairs, leaning melancholically on one arm, my eyes falling across the stone lid of what used to be the Earl Tepes' coffin. Of course it was empty, I myself had scattered his ashes at a crossroads to put his soul to rest.
But the untouched nature of the crypt made me want to go open it, expecting to see him inside, his eyes closed in peaceful slumber, his lips turned up at the corners in his ever-gentle manner of smiling.
I would never forgive myself for not making it in time to save him.
I stood up, tears of blood forming in my eyes as I touched his coffin, running my fingers along the cared effigy of his face. I leaned down, kissing the granite lips gently, tears falling freely form my eyes and running down the frozen stone face of Vladislav, Count of Tepes.
I hadn't wept like this before, not even when the Death Eaters had killed him. It was only now, on the 51st anniversary of my turning, that I wept bitterly for him.
.oOo.
I slept for many days afterwards, cutting class. No one in my dormitory noticed, but I didn't mind. The only guilt for this I felt was that Anna didn't know what had become of me.
It was only thoughts of her that forced me to get up, wipe the blood from my eyes, and go to class.
She spoke sharply to me when I appeared in the hallway outside the classroom, but there was relief in her eyes. I wanted to embrace her, but instead a stood awkwardly before her, keeping back more bloody tears.
"Where have you been?" Anna muttered, her voice smiling.
"Funny you should ask that. I got lost in a wardrobe." I said with a laugh, referencing another muggle book she'd lent me. Her soft green eyes flashed with amusement and we both laughed.
Authors Note: My friend that I'm writing this for/about hasn't seen this yet, I don't think. ;)
And if she's anything like the Anna I wrote, she'll flay me alive XD
Review plox? People are much more mature about this than they are about my other writing.