Chapter 24.
There was no denying that sound; she knew it was Nick before she turned to confirm it. She hadn't thought to see him so soon! She hadn't thought at all of what she would say to him, how she would put words to her new feelings, and she wasn't ready to see him now.
She continued walking, she even tried to walk faster though that was difficult. And silly, futile. She stopped and stood still as Nick and Coco overtook her.
"ARE YOU CRAZY? ARE YOU INSANE?" he yelled at her. He turned Coco to block her path, shouting at her, "WHAT THE HELL COULD YOU HAVE BEEN THINKING?" as he dismounted.
Nick's shouting at her didn't bother her; his anger didn't upset her. She wasn't even stirred when he grabbed her shoulders and demanded that she never run away. All she was capable of in that moment was searching his face and saying, "I'm so sorry, Nick. I'm so sorry," as the tears welled up in her eyes again.
Something had changed in her. Something had thawed and he recognized it immediately. Even with damp curls falling out of her wet, limp bonnet and the tip of her nose red from the cold wind, she presented a delicate beauty. No matter she was mostly drenched and splattered with mud, she took his breath away.
He pulled her in close and wrapped his arms around her, sensing her emotional fragility and knowing she must be very cold. With her hands clenched under her chin, she relaxed her head against his chest, and sighed deeply.
Then she started to cry. She cried hard and for a long time and still he didn't let her go, he only tightened his hold.
As the crying subsided, she pulled back slowly, but only as far as he would allow.
She looked up at him and said quietly, "Nick, I'm so sorry," she said, "You were right, I have been making you fight a ghost." Tears were falling down her face but she didn't hide them this time, she continued to look into his eyes. He cupped her face in his gloved hand and wiped away the tears and rain from her cheek with his thumb. "And I am . . . I have been afraid of change."
Nick said nothing but waited for a little more.
"I've been living with a ghost and using him as a shield to protect me because I am - was afraid." Hearing her own words only confirmed to her that she was ready now to live her life fully and without Sam.
"And you're no longer afraid?" he asked.
She frowned, thinking, and said, "No. Yes. But I think I can face my fears."
"Maybe you'll let me be your shield? I'm no ghost but . . ."
He stopped when she nodded her head.
With that, he slipped his hand from her cheek to her chin, lifted it, and kissed her.
They stood locked in their kiss, the wind and the rain unnoticed, ignored. When they loosened their embrace, it was slow and deliberate.
"Come on," he said, softly, "Let's go back to the house."
He helped her get up on Coco and pushed the wet skirts covering the saddle up closer to her. He climbed into the saddle behind her, very close, holding the reins in one hand and using his other arm to keep her close against his body.
Little was said on the ride back to the house. He held her tight and she nestled her head against his shoulder. As they approached the main gate to the house, he leaned his head down so is mouth was near her ear and asked, very softly, "Emily, will you marry me?"
She reached her hand back to touch his face, nodded, and then she said, "Yes."