Sam's P.O.V.
Days and months passed. I was still in a depression I felt nothing, nothing whatsoever my feelings were neutral. Sadly, it never changed. I still watch Freddie and Carly make out in the hallways at school and it pained me. As I would watch, I would question myself, Why did I do this to myself, it only made me feel worst, ugly and not good enough for anyone. The days grew more and I found my self staring at a razor one day. I thought of cutting but then I set it down and thought of how foolish it was of me to even consider it, such a stupid thing it would be to do it. I left the room and went to mine. About 5 minutes later I found my self in the room again staring at the razor. I held it up to my wrist, I thought to my self what could be the harm? I just wanted to see if I was still human, still alive and that not all my feelings had gone away I just wanted to feel pain, so I pressed it against my skin...Suddenly, blood gushed out and I felt pain all over my wrist, surprisingly, it felt good. I did it once again and again then I decided to stop. The cuts weren't deep enough to kill me but still, I didn't want to end up in the hospital then put in to some stupid crazy house with kids who have problems with life I didn't want to go to that damn house no matter what people said or did.. I sat on the bathroom floor flashbacks form everything filled my mind Freddie, what I just did, Carly, my old best friend basically everything I then realized I was crying, my guess was from all the pain both physical and emotional. I let the blood run down my wrists from the cuts I had just opened and I sat there until it healed. By the time I got out it must have been a few hours that had gone by, I didn't want anyone to see me the way I was and had locked my self in the room and wouldn't let anyone come in. By the time I had gotten out no one was home, I was alone. I walked over to the kitchen table where I found a note. It read:
Dear Sam, Your sister, father and I have gone out to eat. We weren't sure if you wanted to come so we left you this note. We didn't want to disturb you we know how hard everything has been on you. Well, if you want to join us we will be at your favorite restaurant if you want to join, give us a call. We love you sweetie and we all hope you get better soon, we miss our always smiling Sam.
Love you always;
Mom
Well, at least three people cared. I layed down on the couch when suddenly I herd a knock at the door so I went to answer it. "Freddie?" "Hey," he looked at me weakly.
"Whats wrong?"
"I love you!"
"What?"
And then he kissed me...
I quickly sat up. Ugh fuck! Another fucking dream about him! This goes on every night haunting me, as if it is teasing me because I will never in my life have Fredward Benson. This pained me even more then ever. I couldn't take it anymore I went to my mother's medicine draw. I took out my mother's prescribed pain killers I looked at it for a second then wondered if it would help make the pain go away after all they are pain killers and I placed five in my hand. I looked at it, without thinking twice I took it with a cup of water. A few minutes passed I just looked at myself in the mirror my skin pale as a ghost, my blue eyes red and puffy with tears still streaming down. Out of no where my body started shaking violently. What was happening? I was scared I wanted to panic scream something! Next thing I knew I was falling, it all felt like slow motion then I hit the floor, rock bottom and I felt my eyes growing heavier and heavier so I closed them and it all went black...
Freddie's P.O.V.
I was walking to Carly's house when I walked in I herd noise from Carly's room, being extremely curious I decided to go and see what it was, when I opened the door I saw Steve and Carly screwing around.
"WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON!" I yelled wishing my eyes where playing tricks on me. This had to be a dream right? As soon as they heard this Carly and Steve pulled they're naked bodies away from each other.
"We were celebrating." Steve said smiling widely and Carly smiling up at him. "WHAT? CHEATING ON ME?" I yelled some more staring at Carly. Steve looked confused, "No, Carly's having my baby." he said innocently.
This hit me, hard. Carly has been cheating on me all those times she was "working" she was sleeping her way through the human body, for some reason it didn't botter me as much as I thought it would but it still hurt me knowing she was cheating on me I would have never took her for that "type." I decided to leave the room before I embarrassed myself more, Carly followed me out to her living room in Steve's shirt.
"I was going to tell you, sorry you found out like this, can we be friends?"
"FRIENDS! You cheated on me and expect me to be your friend? Fuck no, I'm not! We're so past friends it not even funny, I hope I never see your whorey face again, bitch!" With that I left slamming the door with a teary-eyed Carly, but I didn't give a shit. I started walking to my house when I got a phone call, it was Melanie. I could hear her crying on he other end. Startled I found my self saying, "Melanie, what's wrong!"
"Freddie, it's Sam!" As she said the name more tears came and she sounded as if she were going to hyperventilate. Worry flashed through me, I felt like I were going to collapse, Sam, my Sam this, now this brought pain to my aching heart. "Mel, what happened to Sam!" I found myself asking.
More and more tears came, "She's in the hospital!" I quickly dropped my phone and ran toward the hospital I didn't notice until I got there but I was crying a little myself. When I arrived I asked for Sam Puckett's room and they gave me her room number. As fast as I could I ran to it. When I got to the third floor I didn't even greet Melanie or her parents I just ran straightly into Sam's room and I saw the doctor writing on a paper shaking his head.
I gulped before I spoke, "How is she?" Praying inside my head she was going to be okay and her limp body on the bed was just a sleeping Sam.
He looked at me startled for a brief moment, "You're not suppose to be in here young man." he said very calmly.
"Please," I asked begging, "I love her." My voice was trembling I could hear it, I really felt like I was going to collapse now.
The doctor sighed and replied, "She's in a coma, from an over-dose. My papers say she was diagnosed with depression a few months back on January 12, 2010. My guess is she she was upset about something and
overdosed she also was a cutter, her wrists are slit, this all makes her chances very slim for surviving, it will be a miracle if she does." The doctor looked at her one last time shook his head and left me alone with her. I sat next to her on the chair beside her, a bunch of thoughts ran through my mind about what the doctor said.
January 12, then it hit me, that was only a few days after Carly and I started dating. FUCK! I couldn't believe it what if this was my fault? Oh Sam...This was all my fault! I started crying hard and held Sam's hand tight. "I'm so sorry Sam, this is all my fault." I cried more. Watching her lay in the bed helpless so…so lifeless. It ripped my heart out. I felt this strange pain in my chest it pained even more then before. Like I was alone or life died and had no more meaning like I had just died. I realized it now at this exact moment, staring at Sam laying down so helplessly. It took all this to happen to make me realize how crazily deeply and passionately in love I was with Samantha Puckett. I leaned over to her ear and whispered: I love you Sam....