Hagrid led us into the forest. The theastrals were there, many of them wandered carelessly through the foggy wood. There was even a baby theastral. It was cute, in a clumsy way, even though theastrals were generally bony and reptilian, which made them eerie.

"Who can see the creatures?" he asked. To most kids, there was nothing there, but I had the experience of death in my past. Harry, Neville, and I were the only who raised our hands. "They're theastrals. They're a rare sort of beast that can only be seen by those who have witnessed death"

"Or caused it," Malfoy snickered to his thugs. My fists tightened, but I saw Harry in the corner of my eye and stopped. Gryffindor needed me. Surely I would get kicked off the team if I gave Umbridge even a reason to give me another detention. I looked at Harry, searching for salvation from my impulse to slug Malfoy like I did Dudley. Harry seemed to be clenching his jaw, his knuckles white from his tight fists. Could it be that Harry blames himself for someone's death?

"Expelliarmus!" I shouted, sending a spell straight at Adry. Her wand flew out of her hand and flipped across the room. "Accio!" the wand zipped back into my free hand.

"Excellent work, Jenny!" Harry shot me a proud smile. I beamed back at him while Adry approached me to get her wand back. She sent me a suggestive look and I slapped her arm before making sure Harry hadn't seen. He was safely checking on other students, so I returned to practicing.

"You know, you're going to lose him if you don't do something. There are girls lined around the block, waiting for a chance with Harry," she whispered.

"Shut up," I hissed, stepping back to give us enough space to continue.

"Expelliarmus!" Adry shouted, only to have her wand fly in the air. It spun around before falling at her feet.

"Your stance," I alerted her, "it's unbalanced. Find a stance that works for you. Your spells will come more easily after that"

She picked up her wand and shifted her feet around before trying any more spells. "Expelliarmus!"

My wand flew out of my hand. A smile stretched across my face, but my congratulation was belated.

"Nice one, Adry! Keep it up!" one of the twins shouted. I didn't see which, but the applause seemed to give Adrienne enough of a confidence boost to want to do it again. I retrieved my wand and faced Adry. We kept going at it until Neville successfully cast his spell. We all crowded around him, cheering for his overdue success.

"So, that's it for this lesson. Now, we're not going to be meeting again until after the holidays, so just keep practicing on your own as best you can. Well done, everyone!" Harry announced. Everyone made their way to the door, but I stopped when I passed an old mirror adorned with photographs and articles. I recognized one of the photos as Cedric in his triwizard champion uniform.

I felt my heart drop as I read over some of the articles of casualties from mysterious circumstances. I, of course, knew they had all been murdered or tortured by Voldemort and his followers. It frustrated me that the ministry was allowing everyone to be so oblivious to the truth. These people deserved to be honored and remembered for the truth.

"Hey, you okay?" Harry appeared behind me. I looked in the mirror and saw that everyone had already left.

"Yeah," I spoke softly, pulling a piece of old parchment out. It was the photo of the original Order. "I just want people to be remembered properly," I said, sticking the photo to the mirror. I didn't want to part with the photo with my mom, but I felt it was the right thing to do. "That's my mum, right there. Michelle," I ran my finger over the photo in the place where my mother stood.

"She's beautiful. You're beautiful"

I turned to Harry, who was looking at me with only love and understanding. What did I do to deserve him?

What happened next would change us forever.

We kissed.

That night, I didn't go back to the common room with Harry.

"Where are you going?" Harry asked as we left the Room of Requirement. He was heading for the common room, while I started another route.

"I need some time to think," I inhaled deeply, "alone"

He looked confused and, maybe, hurt. I didn't want to give him the wrong idea, but- hell, I didn't know what was the right idea. I turned away quickly, for looking at him seemed to make my brain stop. I needed to think, and therefore, my brain must be on.

Even after I was far from Harry, I couldn't seem to clear my mind. I even felt a little lightheaded. No matter how hard I tried to focus, all I could see was Harry.

Thoroughly perplexed, I went to the lake for clarity. Frustrated, I slid to the ground with my back against the trunk of the tree. I ran my fingers through my hair, in a vain attempt at calming myself. I decided there was no use in trying to think about anything but Harry, so he would go first.

I really want to keep Harry as a friend, but that's impossible now that we've kissed. Even as I thought about it, my stomach did flips. But how can we be more? We're in the middle of a war. It would be risky to throw dating into the mix. People want to kill Harry, and he needs his mind clear in order to stay sharp and defend himself. If one kiss did all of this to me then what about Harry? I can't be responsible for distracting him. Worse, if I was in danger and he was fighting someone, I would only be a hindrance. I wouldn't want him to sacrifice himself for me.

Whoa- I stopped myself. That was a serious thought. Would Harry-? No, that would mean he cares more about me than himself. He couldn't love me.

But even so, I knew that there was more to that kiss than I was convincing myself.

"Jenny!"

Startled, I jumped near out of my robes. I turned to see Hermione running towards me with her hair flapping wildly behind her.

"Hermione! What are you-"

"It's Mr. Weasley- he's been attacked"