A/N: Hey here's an update, sorry it's short, but let's just go with it… let's see where it leads…Thanks Luv, Kmd,and xxCGMxx for your ideas... you helped me with my hump for today... lets hope we can keep it going... :)

**Progress**

"Renesmee wait, don't go," Jake said tugging her arm as she headed down the steep spiral staircase of the tower. "We need to talk."

Renesmee whirled around at the contact on her arm causing Jake to quickly retract his grasp on her.

"Sorry…" she mumbled and began looking around anxiously.

"It's this tower…the bricks…the chill in the air…isn't it? Does it bring it all back?" Jake asked tentatively, and a solitary tear slid down Nessie's cheek. "Come on, let's go outside." Jake suggested offering Renesmee his hand.

Renesmee felt ridiculous at her hesitation… she never had hesitated before…

"It's okay my love, I understand. You are having flashbacks of your experience. I'm right here. We'll get through it together," he said extending his hand closer to her.

Nessie smiled weakly, "sorry," she said and placed her hand in Jacob's, moving closer to him and leaned into his embrace. "Baby, you never have to apologize," he said and walked her down the tower, through the house and out into the fresh air.

"Maybe we can go for a swim…" she suggested, "and talk."

"There's a lake about thirty miles from here… do you wanna ride my back?" Jake asked with a smile, stripping and quickly phasing.

Renesmee's face lit up, it had been a long time since he had phased, and riding his back was something she hadn't done since the old, easy days. Grabbing his clothes, she hopped up onto the giant wolf and they took off for the lake.

The wind in her face, the passing of the colorful autumn leaves floating through the air sent Renesmee to an altered state of being for the moment. To Nessie, every forest had a wealth of secrets, every tree a lifetime of worries and a lifetime of happiness stored up in its trunk, and the eerie feeling of the forest made her feel almost euphoric. The sun filtered through the leaves making the forest almost glow with reds, oranges, pinks and browns. It was here, running this way, that Renesmee was able to feel the faint connection with the woman she once was; before she was shattered. As Jake came to slow down, Renesmee could smell the lake water just ahead, and she could feel her bars returning to her and she wished for an endless moment of freedom with Jake, without the constraints of the past… perhaps she would ask Damian about hypnotherapy…

Jake let Nessie down, phased, put on his jeans, and in a matter of moments, they were strolling side by side, on the water's edge. As they walked their skin would graze as the breeze caressed the leaves of the trees and rustled her pink silk dress against her legs. Renesmee kicked her sandals off toward Jake's shirt that she left by a tree, to match his barefooted ramble through the licks of the water.

"Hello Renesmee Black," Jacob said, grinning. The smile that he hoped for broke through the clouds of Renesmee's brow revealing the woman inside. The woman he had married. "God, I love you."

"Jake, I love you too… "

"May I hold your hand?" he asked dipping his head to measure her every emotion that passed beneath her eyes.

She smiled sweetly, offering her hand. "Jake, I don't know how to talk about this."

"We can go one word at a time, or one look at a time, whatever makes you more comfortable."

"I know we need to… it's been about seven months since…" she began and a shiver went through her skin. "I know you want to…"

"No, not if you don't want to, or feel uncomfortable; I understand. Nessie, I just want you to feel safe again." Jake said cradling her face with one of his hands.

"Maybe we can just take it one step at a time, and see how it goes." Nessie offered shyly dropping her eyes from his piercing gaze, but was greeted by his full, broad chest. Her hand trembled as she laid a hand on his heart. Her eyes were drawn back to his face, while her hand remained on his heart, "your heart understands mine…" she said, another tear escaping her eyes. "I feel safe here," she said, resting her face against his chest, near his heart, tears beginning to flow freely, silently down her cheeks.

Jacob caressed her hair, keeping her warm in his embrace as she silently wept. Jacob's eyes closed, with the feeling of being washed in the scent of Jasmine and caressed in silk as Renesmee shared her feelings with him and enveloped him in her sweet, safe, hiding place.

After an immeasurable moment of gathering her strength, Renesmee decided it was time to try. The tears shining in her eyes in the soft, defused light of twilight made her eyes look a lovely shade of misty honey as they pleaded along with her words, "kiss me…"

The hesitation in her voice, Jacob matched with his own slow movements as he slowly lowered his face to hers. The tears squeezed out of her closing eyes as she pushed herself up, as if through her fear, to reach his face. His kiss began very tentatively, allowing her to move at her own pace, through her own fear, through her own grief, to a place where she felt safe in her display of affection. Her arms slowly snaked up his shoulders and around his neck, as he bent further into their kiss.

The mist seemed to follow them as Renesmee, through their kiss, guided him into the water.

His kisses trailed along her lips, along her jaw, into her neck while his hands traced up and down her back. Nessie could feel the time he was taking to caress her, to make her feel safe and loved, and his slow pace was exactly that, a demonstration of love. There was no hurry through his kisses, no secret desire to press further. His kisses were perfectly content, as they went in a circuit that ended at her collar bone.

"Jake…" Nessie murmured, and sighed, "I'm okay…" she said pulling back to look into his eyes. "I do still want you," she assured him kissing his neck, and his chest. "I love your heart," she said kissing the skin that protected it, "I love your strength," said she, kissing his arms, "you protect me, I trust you…" she said opening the top of her dress, .at.. Then taking his hands and placing them on her chest, she brought his face down to kiss her again.

"Only if you're sure," he said kissing her neck, massaging her breasts gently, "we can stop anytime…" he assured her.

"I love you Jacob Black…what did I ever do to deserve your love?"

"And I love you my life…"he said kissing her sweetly.

The water lapped around their waists as they were still clothed, and they kissed, rubbing each other lovingly.

Jacob could feel a shiver run through her body as his hands trailed down her stomach. "Do you want me to stop?" He asked stepping back from her, to measure her response.

Her hesitation spoke before she could say no and Jake embraced her gently and whispered into her ear, "that's enough this time my love… one step at a time." Her trembling body told Jacob that he was right, and he kissed her gently on the lips and re-buttoned her dress.

"I'm sorry," Renesmee said, tears sliding down in shame on her cheeks.

"My love you are the strongest person I've ever known. You never have to apologize to me, especially for this." Jake said cradling her face again.

"It is my fault Jake, it is!" she broke down sobbing on his chest.

"Oh my love..."

"It is, don't try to make it easier for me. I did it to myself. I'm so dirty. How could you love me anymore?" she quietly wailed.

Tears filled Jake's eyes as he held her closely and they spilled over into her hair, "there is nothing that could ever make me not love you. Your love is so pure Nessie; you are the most beautiful, clean woman I could ever imagine. I would be nothing without you. It's going to be alright my darling, my life," he cried in her hair holding her tightly against his body.

"I would be so lost without you Jake," Nessie sobbed.

"And you are my brilliant, shining light in the darkness and my glory, Renesmee," Jake said trying to halt his tears, for the sake of his beloved.

Jake took a deep breath and tried to don a smile, "take a swim with me?"

Nessie began to unbutton her dress again, but Jake stopped her with a mischievous smile, "nope, keep your clothes on," he said smiling brighter and dove into the water.

They swam around and floated on their backs as the moon rose above them, then cuddled on the shore until they fell asleep in each other's embrace under the starry heavens.

…

"Edward, have you seen Nessie?" Bella asked after having checked the entire west wing of the house.

"She's with Jake, he followed her yesterday; they spent the night out in the woods." Edward said unconcerned, still reading his book with his legs crossed.

"You know, even though it would be completely stupid for her to go out to NY, she does have a point…this whole charade is retarded…" Bella said in concentration, looking out the window as the pinks and oranges of the sunrise seemed to bleed into the sky.

"What are you thinking?" Edward asked, closing his book, standing up from the arm chair.

"We need to get to the bottom of this. I'm sick of Aro." Bella said unflinchingly staring out in concentration toward the western horizon.

Edward crossed the room placing his arm around Bella's shoulder, "…and what do you propose, my love?"

"He took our Nessie… we were forced to kill Demetri… I know he wants retribution… I say we bring him here…" Bella said then turned around to face Edward, "tell Carlisle to come… bring his shadow with him… what do we have to fear?"

"That's an interesting idea…" Edward agreed… "But I have a better idea… Nessie may have been on to something…I'll talk to the Count." Edward said, striding out of the room…