Chapter 41

Gavin yawned, stretched and opened his eyes to see that morning had come. He smiled at the memories of the night before and turned to Fenris only to find the other side of the bed empty. He sat up and looked around the room, but saw no sign of the elf. He climbed out of bed and searched the nightstand, bureau and writing table, trying to find a note of some kind. Nothing. Turning, he stumbled back to the bed, slumping down on the edge. Fenris had left him. Left him! His breath hitched in his throat and tears formed in his eyes. Just before he gave into his feelings fully, the bedroom door opened and in walked Fenris with a tray in his hands.

Closing the door with his foot, Fenris moved further into the room, stopping short when he saw Gavin was awake. "I brought us some breakfast," he smiled at the mage. The smile faded as he saw the distress the other was in. "What's wrong?" he asked in concern.

Gavin swallowed hard before whispering, "You were gone." He saw the elf frown and elaborated, "I woke up and you weren't here. And I thought, I thought-"

"Oh Gavin," Fenris set the tray on the bureau and hurried to gather the mage into his arms. "I woke up and you were asleep and I thought breakfast in bed would be a nice way to spend the morning."

"I'm sorry."

"Shhh, no need to apologize," the elf soothed. "I guess we should have a little heart to heart talk. I thought you understood what it meant for me to give myself to you last night."

"I'm sorry I doubted you," Gavin apologized again, pulling away and sitting up straight. "And after asking you to trust me, I don't trust you to not just disappear," he said ruefully.

"It's not like I haven't given you reason enough to doubt me," Fenris shook his head. Getting up, he retrieved the tray and placed it in the middle of the bed. "Let's eat while we talk."

"Pancakes, eggs, sausage, coffee," Gavin observed happily. "All my favorites," he pointed out.

"Your mother was in the kitchen," Fenris said softly. "She fussed over me, seeming to be pleased I was here. I think she knew," he finished, blushing slightly.

"Now that whole thing with Varric's book makes sense," Gavin turned bright red. "Jethann must have let her know what he had planned."

"Remind me to thank him later," Fenris chuckled. "It turned out better than I could have dreamed."

They ate in silence for a while. Finally Gavin looked up, "I'm sorry for overreacting earlier. I should have known that you wouldn't just leave like that."

"My prior actions gave you cause to doubt me."

"No," Gavin shook his head. "You told me once that you would never bow to another mage, that you would rather die than submit. The fact that you willingly chained yourself and knelt before me was proof that you are a different person from before. I know how hard that must have been for you. I should have trusted in that and trusted that you would not leave me without explanation."

"Jethann said actions speak louder than words, but sometimes words are necessary," Fenris caught and held Gavin's gaze. "I love you Gavin, with every fiber of my being. I am yours, now and forever. I will never willingly leave your side. Being with you, fighting at your side, gives my life meaning and purpose. Without you, I am nothing. You make my life complete."

Gavin couldn't stop the tears from flowing down his cheeks. "I love you too, always and forever. When you turned away from me, I almost didn't want to go on. I had to fight to find a reason to get up each morning. You make my life complete too."

"Only death could take me from your side now," the elf vowed solemnly.

Gavin shook his head, "I don't want to live without you, I never even want to try."

"I feel the same way," Fenris said softly. He sealed that promise with a gentle kiss. He pulled back and smiled slightly, "Now that the mushy stuff is out of the way, what would you like to do today?"

Gavin smirked and said, "Stay in bed and make love to you until you can't walk."

Fenris was surprised at how hot and bothered that statement made him and he felt his entire body flush. Yesterday, if someone had told him he would actually want to be taken, he would have laughed. But now, after what Gavin had done to him the night before, he was eager to experience it again. He cleared his throat, "That sounds appealing."

Gavin's eyes widened in surprise. Even though Fenris was blushing furiously, he could see that the elf was serious. "You know, making love is a two way street. I missed having you in my bed, my arms," he paused and his voice became husky, "inside of me, claiming me."

"Then let's explore all the ways in which to give each other pleasure," Fenris growled. He picked up the tray, moved it to the bureau and then returned to the bed. He stretched out and opened his arms, "Make love to me again Hawke."

Gavin proceeded to do just that. They spent the rest of the morning and part of the afternoon exploring each other's bodies, ending with Fenris pounding Gavin to the most intense orgasm he'd ever had. Afterwards, they lay happily entwined with each other. After some time, Gavin worked up the nerve to ask, "Move in with me?"

Fenris didn't say anything for a long time. "You know that Danarius is still out there. I know he won't give up his search. If I move here, then I put everyone who lives here at risk."

"Not as much as you might think," Gavin argued. "Sandal is an absolute genius when it comes to enchantments, runes, and the like. It would be easy for him to create magical wards for the doors and windows. Plus, the estate has a couple of safe rooms, places to hide that are hard to penetrate. Neither Danarius nor his lackeys would be able to sneak in here. Furthermore, if they dared attack here, they would face not only you and me, but Fang as well. A mabari warhound is a force to be reckoned with all on its own."

Fenris thought about that for a while. "You have a point, but-"

"You value your freedom," Gavin sighed. "I know, and maybe this is too much, too fast, but I want you with me always. I want to eat dinner with you every night. I want to have your company at night in the study. And I want you in my bed, in my arms."

"I'm not sure I'm ready for that yet," Fenris shook his head.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't push you on this," he apologized. "I just wanted you to know how I felt."

"It's okay," Fenris shushed him. "This is a new direction for us. I'm not going anywhere. We have time, so let's not rush things."

"Okay," Gavin smiled at him. Suddenly his stomach growled and he blushed. At the same time, there came a whine and then some barking at the door.

Fenris laughed, "I think that's our cue to get out of bed. You need food and your hound misses you."

They quickly washed up and got dressed. Gavin opened the door and Fang bounded in, stubby tail wagging. He panted happily as his master pet him before seeing Fenris standing nearby. Fang went still and then sniffed the air before moving towards the elf. He sniffed a couple times, looked over his shoulder at Gavin, then licked Fenris' hand and barked twice before leaving the room.

"I think he knows," Gavin said, blushing profusely.

"I'm sure he does," Fenris chuckled. "Mabari are very smart and the room does smell of sex."

"You can smell it?"

"Yes," the elf smirked. "My senses are enhanced by the lyrium in my skin, remember?"

Gavin cleared his throat, "Yes, well, food. Time to eat, I'm starved."

Fenris chuckled as the mage all but ran out the door. It always amazed him how easily Gavin was embarassed or flustered. It was just one of the many endearing qualities the man had. He followed him down to the kitchen where he found Jethann sitting with Leandra. The other elf was almost gloating.

"Was I right or was I right?" Jethann smirked.

"Yes, you were," Fenris growled as he felt his face heat once more.

"You're not getting any details," Gavin warned.

"Aww, that takes all the fun out of it," the red-head complained.

"We can see that it all worked out the way we hoped it would," Leandra said gently. "Let's leave it at that."

"Yes ma'am," Jethann nodded. He waited until the two were seated at the table. "I'm glad that it worked out for you. If any two people in this world belong together, it's you two. I hope that there'll be no more stupidity on the part of either of you."

Gavin looked at Fenris and smiled before taking the elf's hand. "I'm sure that we'll probably end up doing or saying something stupid to each other on occassion. But, we won't be running or hiding when that happens. We'll talk about it."

"Yes, no more hiding," Fenris agreed.

Jethann jumped to his feet, a huge smile on his face. "Orana is going to be so happy when I tell her."

They watched him go and then sat in silence for a while. "I'm really happy that the two of you are back together," Leandra finally said. "All a mother wants in her life is to see her children grown and healthy and happy. Be good to my son Fenris. He needs you in his life, especially now."

"What do you mean by that?" Gavin looked askance at her.

"Well, I haven't wanted to say anything, but I've met someone," she smiled, blushing a little.

"He must be pretty special judging by the expression on your face," Fenris observed shrewdly.

"I love your father, but he's been gone for several years," she told them. "I know he wouldn't want me to be alone for the rest of my life. However, I didn't want to consider a relationship with anyone until I knew that Gavin would be okay. He's the only child I have left and his happiness means so much to me."

"How long have you been seeing this man? What's his name? When will I meet him?" the questions came bursting out of Gavin.

"For a few weeks now," Leandra smiled at her son. "And I'm not ready to say more than that at the moment. You know how terrible gossip is amongst the nobles. I want to keep my private life private for a little longer. At least until I know if the relationship is really going somewhere."

Gavin reached over and took his mother's hand, "You suffered as much as I have. You have a right to whatever happiness you can find."

"Thank you dear," she smiled at him. "Oh, before I forget, Anders came by. He left a message asking you to come to the clinic this afternoon. He didn't say what for."

Gavin looked at Fenris and saw the elf frowning. "I should go and see what he needs. He's still in a fragile state of mind."

Fenris sighed, "It's okay Gavin, I understand." He stood up, "And I will go with you. Anders is your friend and if we're to have an honest relationship then I have to accept that and deal with it."

"Thank you," Gavin also stood. Kissing his mother on the cheek, "We'll be back for dinner and I want everyone to join us. We have some celebrating to do."

"That's an excellent idea," Leandra nodded. "I'll get started on things now."

"Okay," Gavin smiled and left the kitchen.

Fenris nodded at Leandra and then followed the mage quickly. He didn't tell Gavin, but he had his own reasons for going to Anders' clinic. The apostate had feelings for Gavin and had designs on the man. He would make sure that Anders knew that Gavin was his and his alone.