Chapter 53

The next morning at the breakfast table saw the reunited friends in serious discussion about events following the 'Champion's' departure. "I'm sorry my leaving caused you and Sebastian so many problems," Gavin apologized again.

"Will you stop it Hawke!" Varric scowled. "Kirkwall was a mess before you showed up. You being there merely masked how inept, ineffectual, and buffoonish the so called leaders of that place are."

"That's putting it mildly," Jethann snorted, dodging a swipe from Orana for his remark.

"One man cannot do it all, even one such as Hawke," Fenris remarked.

"One person you haven't mentioned yet is Merrill," Gavin prodded and saw the dwarf's face cloud. "What's wrong?"

"I guess I wasn't sure how to break the news to you," he muttered. "Merrill is dead," he said sadly. Gasps and cries of shock and disbelief greeted the news.

"Was it the Templars?" Fenris asked. "I always figured they'd wise up one day to the presence of a blood mage in their midst." He blithely ignored Gavin's glare.

"Remember that stupid mirror of hers?" Varric asked. "Well, she went back again to try and find the demon who'd helped her before. Said it was the only one who could tell her how to get it to work. Against our better judgement, Anders and I accompanied her, and we brought Fang along since the pup needed excercise."

"What happened?" Gavin's voice was soft and sad.

"Apparently, to protect her people and her apprentice from the danger the demon posed, the Keeper used her body to trap and cage it," the dwarf growled. "The demon's plan was to possess Merrill and then excape to wreak havoc on the clan and then the world at large."

"So, Merrill was killed fighting the demon then," Fenris said approvingly.

"No, she survived the fight," Varric waived them to silence so he could finish. "The only way for the demon to die was for Marethari to be killed. After weakening the demon, Merrill delivered the death blow and ended the threat. Then her people came looking for their Keeper."

"Though I lived my whole life in the city, I knew of elves who'd grown up in clans," Jethann spoke up. "There is no person more revered and loved by the clan than their Keeper. Her death would be akin to the death of a King or Grand Cleric amongst the humans. No matter the reason, the clan would want revenge for their Keeper."

"And that's what happened, isn't it?" Gavin asked sadly.

"They came to the cave looking for her and found Merrill kneeling beside the body with us standing nearby feeling rather helpless and sad," Varric sniffed at the memory. "Anders was quick to spill the beans and after that, Merrill's fate was sealed. We were ordered to leave or suffer the same fate as the Keeper. We left, although it took some convincing on our part to get Fang to listen."

"So you didn't see her killed then?" Fenris asked. "She could still be alive," he finished suspiciously.

"We went back down to the camp to wait," Varric shook his head. "The hunters came down with both bodies. They were given a proper buriel and we were allowed to witness it. Anders seemed to feel it was justified."

"Strange of him, seeing as how he's possessed himself," Jethann was puzzled.

"It's different," Gavin told him. "His possession was a noble attempt to save a friend. Futile, short-sighted, and ultimately it will be his downfall. Justice was once a good spirit of the Fade. Merrill, however, deliberately sought out a demon for purely selfish reasons. She traded her humanity for knowledge and power. Even though the demon was destroyed, she would be an open vessel for the next one to come along. Perhaps an even stronger one. There can never be an honest deal with a demon. Furthermore, once you've stepped into those waters, you eventually drown."

"That was Anders' reasoning," Varric nodded. "It does make me feel better hearing you say the same thing. Even though you were never fond of her, at least you weren't openly hostile."

"Is this knowledge gained recently, or did you always have it?" Fenris asked, one brow arched.

"Eh? What's he mean by that?" Varric scowled at the mage.

"He means that Gavin had help surviving the battle with the Arishok," Jethann said simply, his tone implying nothing was unusual about that.

Squirming under the dwarf's scrutiny, Gavin hastened to explain. "I was dying and already in the Fade. A spirit named Hope came to me and breathed life back into me. She established a link that will allow me to call upon her should I have need in the future. This link also gives me unique insight into the Fade and the Spirits and Demons that inhabit it."

"That's incredible," Varric breathed.

"One way to put it," Fenris snorted. "Another is disturbing."

"You said it also protects you from Demons," Jethann looked over at him. "She would be able to keep them at bay."

"Not exactly," Gavin corrected. "I have free will. As long as I choose to not deal with demons she will help me against any who would try to trick me. She will also enhance my powers when I fight demons in our world. However, if at some point I decide to listen to a demon's blandishments, then her help will be withdrawn. That is what makes the good spirits so different from the demons. They do not interfere with our free will."

"Still, seeing what has happened with Anders, I can't help but wonder if the same thing will happen with you eventually," Fenris worried.

"Believe it or not, there have been mages who have connected with such spirits in the past, and not fallen to possession." Gavin told him. "They're known as spirit healers and while rare, have been present inside the Circles since the beginning. Anders situation is different in that he allowed Justice to inhabit his body. From what Hope has indicated, this is unnatural and should never have been done. Mankind as a whole is too fraught with corruption and sin for such a joining to ever work."

"From the few talks I've had with Anders, it seems that this is the case," Varric nodded. "He's worried about what he's done to his friend."

"Do we need to go back to Kirkwall?" Fenris asked. Seeing the horrified look Gavin gave him he hastened to explain. "Anders trusts you and you would be able to stay close to him. That way, if the spirit overcomes him, you'll be there to put an end to him."

"No way!" the mage sputtered angrily. "It's not my problem anymore. Meredith and Elthina both are aware of his presence in the city. They also know he is a Grey Warden. Whatever their reasons, they have allowed Anders to continue to move freely. If he becomes a problem, they can deal with him however they see fit. Hope told me that not everything is within my power to control, and Anders' situation is one such thing."

"Had a few conversations with your spirit, eh?" Jethann asked, half amused, half alarmed.

Gavin shook his head, "We don't converse. But, when I think about things like this, I intuit some of what she knows. She has much knowledge of the Fade and those creatures who live there. It is a far more complex place than the Circles or the Chantry have ever indicated."

"Perhaps if they spent more time researching the Fade and less time preaching about its dangers, then there'd be fewer blood mages and abominations running amuck," Varric snorted derisively.

"You always were a man of action," Fenris chuckled.

"After what I saw in and around Kirkwall, I have doubts about the Chantry and their methods," Gavin mused aloud. "Most people don't like being cooped up, yet I never saw that many mages hanging around outside the tower. And most of them were older or were one of the Tranquil. If the mages are just sitting in their tower, removed from the world, with nothing to occupy their time beyond reading, then it's no wonder so many get into dangerous things."

"Papa always said idle hands were the tools of evil," Orana spoke up.

"And with mages, they become the tools of demons," Varric shook his head.

"In the beginning, it probably seemed like a good idea," Fenris pondered. "The world was still reeling from the war with the Emperium and the Chantry wanted to ease the fears of the people."

"But, that also made it impossible for the people to know and understand that mages were people like them, just with different talents," Gavin pointed out. "Look at me or Anders or any of the mages who helped during the Blight. We are not monsters or blood mages or threats to those around us. Yet, there are those who fear us simply because of what we could do."

"Well, don't expect those in Kirkwall to be up for listening to anything like that," Varric snorted. "They don't even listen to each other anymore. And, according to Choir Boy, the Grand Cleric seems content to sit around praying to the Maker to solve their problems."

"Yeah, right," Gavin cackled. "How about a change of subject? Is there anything else of interest to us you've yet to tell us about?"

The dwarf frowned, "Not that I can think of." Suddenly his expression cleared, "Wait, there was one more thing. Kind of weird one actually."

"If you consider it to be weird, it must be really out there," Fenris snickered.

"Ha, ha, funny," Varric scowled. "A couple of months back, some dwarves tried to break into the Templar Headquarters. Then a couple of weeks after, another group tried to break into the Amell Estate."

"Well, we did do our best to piss off the Carta," Gavin shrugged. "That would explain them attacking my home."

"But not the Templars," Jethann pointed out. "The templars only concern themselves with mages. An ordinary citizen could murder someone in front of them and they would simply shrug and say call the City Watch. I seriously doubt they did anything to piss off the Carta."

"Well, I did some snooping around, seeing as it's what I do best," Varric rubbed his knuckles against his shirt causing the others to chuckle and roll their eyes. "The only thing anyone could figure out was they were looking for Hawke. No reason why. No idea who sent them. Just they were to find Hawke."

Fenris frowned at him, "That sounds like they were looking for anyone named Hawke. As it's not a common surname, that means they were probably looking for either Gavin, Carver, or Malcolm."

"It also means they don't know that the only one still alive is Gavin," Jethann pointed out.

"So, whatever their reason for seeking out the Hawke family, it's not for anything current," Gavin said thoughtfully.

"That's why I didn't really remember it," Varric shrugged.

"Do me a favor," Gavin looked at him. "Ask around, see what you can find out and let me know. I'd rather that the next time I hear about these guys, it's not when they're knocking on my door."

"Will do Hawke," the dwarf agreed.

"I'll cover all costs, just get me answers," the mage told him.

Seeing that they'd all finished eating, Orana stood up to clear the table. "It looks like a nice day outside. Perhaps Serrah Tethras would like to see the farm. You've all worked so hard to get it up and running."

"You can simply call me Varric," he said to Orana with a wink and a bow that made the elven woman blush becomingly. "Yeah Hawke, show me what you've been doing all this time while I've been working," Varric turned and punched Gavin in the shoulder.

"You mean while you've been ordering others to do the work," Fenris snickered as he also stood.

"It's hard work ordering people around," the dwarf protested, causing the rest to snicker and shake their heads. "All right then. Come on and give me the two copper tour."