Chapter 59

Fenris and Gavin listened silently to the sound of their ship being unloaded and its passengers disembarking. The Pride of Denerim was a magnificent ship and Gavin had regretfully turned down King Alistair's generous offer of a state room complete with servants. He told the king that he was uncomfortable amongst such trappings, but in truth, it would make it harder for them to blend in. The ship may have docked in Kirkwall, but he had no intention of letting the city know he was back. Despite that, his trip north this time was far better than the last because he had a small room to himself instead of a mere spot on the floor of the hold.

"How long do you think we'll have to wait here?" Fenris asked, unable to mask his pallor. The elf didn't like ships or sailing and couldn't wait to get off.

"The message I'm having delivered to Varric instructed him to come after nightfall when the docks are nearly deserted," Gavin replied softly. "And please try to keep your voice low until then. I don't want to risk anyone hearing us and coming to check. If we're found out, we'll end up stuck here."

"Is that likely?" the elf mumbled.

"Given how many poor and desperate people there are in this city, eager to earn favor or coin, yeah," the mage answered. Turning to look out the port window, he approximated the time until dark. "We only have maybe three or four hours to wait. How about a game of dice?"

They idled away the hours, talking quietly and periodically moving around the small quarters. Time seemed to drag and when night came they were starting to fall asleep. Rapid footsteps coming down the hallway brought them wide awake and scrambling for their weapons. The sound of multiple pairs of feet made their nerves tighten and their hands clench. Two knocks, followed by three, then a final two helped them relax.

Gavin went to the door and flung it open, "Varric, about time-"

"Hey Hawke, long time no see," the dwarf smiled at him.

Gavin stared speechlessly at seeing both Anders and Sebastian standing behind Varric. "I said come alone," he finally ground out.

"Yeah, well, these two insisted on knowing where I was going," the dwarf pushed into the room, the others following and closing the door behind them. "Your messenger found me while I was having dinner in The Hanged Man common room. They'd already been pestering me about the ship and getting passage to Ferelden, etc., etc."

"You disappeared on me," Anders' voice was trembling with emotion. "I thought we were friends, but you left without saying goodbye."

"I wrote you a letter-" Gavin started to protest.

"You don't leave letters for friends! You say it to their face," Anders snapped. "After everything we've been through, after watching you almost die at the hands of the Arishok, you leave a note?!"

"Calm down Anders," Sebastian laid a hand on the healer's shoulder. "We don't want to be overheard." He turned to look at Hawke and Fenris, disapproval in his eyes. "Even though I understand why you felt you had to leave as you did, you hurt many people here in the city, and not just their feelings. And I don't mean the nobles or mages either. Those two groups hardly gave a shit that you left. However, the common folk, many of whom are displaced Fereldens, looked to you to help them. They were counting on you, in your role as Champion, to act on their behalf in a city where the majority of them are still living in abject poverty."

"I had to close up my clinic," Anders informed them. "Your patronage of it was well known and all sorts of people came looking for you, scaring away most of the poor that needed my help. Also, without you and your well-paying jobs I helped you out with, my coin dried up, thus leaving me unable to buy sufficient supplies. Dozens of the poor have died since."

"Come on guys, give him a break," Varric admonished, not likely the way his friend's shoulders slumped.

"He needs to understand the consequences of his actions, if he wants help with what he came back to the Free Marches to do," Sebastian said firmly. "Varric has told us why you came back, and we both decided we would help you and not let anyone else know you are back."

"I hear a but in there," Gavin grimaced.

"But, we want your help in return," Anders told him. "And we're talking monetary assistance only. Unless of course you choose otherwise."

"All gold, armor, weapons or other loot that is found is ours to keep and sell," Sebastian stated. "Also, seeing as how you have no intention of residing in Kirkwall, you put the Amell Estate up for sale with the proceeds to go into a trust for Lirene to use to help those Fereldens stuck in Kirkwall who desperately need it. Letting it sit there to crumble into ruin is an inexscusable waste."

"You were named Champion of Kirkwall, and that position would have given you access to city resources to help the less fortunate," Varric said sternly. "A lot of my customers complained bitterly when you up and disappeared. In fact, it might not be too safe for you to walk the streets of Kirkwall anymore."

Gavin could only gape at them, at a complete loss for words. He had never even thought about how others would see his return, only in how it affected him. "I'm sorry, I never meant to hurt anyone."

"After all he did for them, they would still turn on him?" Fenris growled.

"He was well paid for the work he did Fenris," Sebastian pointed out. "That money came out of the pockets of noble, merchant, and even city guard coffers. In fact, Aveline's position as guard captain came under fire because she was friends with you Hawke."

"Does anyone else know I'm here?" Gavin turned to stare out the porthole, his stomach in knots because of this new information.

"I felt it best to keep it between the three of us, for now at least," Varric answered.

"Do you agree to our terms, or do we say goodbye for good this time?" Anders asked.

Gavin didn't answer right away. He looked at Fenris and saw the elf nod. Whatever he decided, Fenris would support him. But, could he just walk away afterwards? His gut told him he would need his friends' help in the Vinmark Mountains. Letting them have all the spoils from the trip was the least he could do. "Before I left, I asked Varric to find a buyer for the estate as I had no intentions of ever coming back."

The others looked at Varric and the dwarf nodded. "He did, but I haven't found anyone reputable who would give me a fair price for it. Yet."

"And I won't sell the estate for less than it's worth or to someone who will use it for nefarious purposes," Gavin said firmly. "So, I can't promise you something I don't have. But, I do have some extra gold on me and you are certainly welcome to keep anything you find on our trip. And when Varric does find a buyer, I will give any money I don't need to Lirene."

"He has already promised support to Jethann and Orana," Fenris told them after seeing that they were about to protest. "He will also need some money for himself. In Ferelden, supporting his fellow citizens will help keep them from turning him into the Tower."

"I think that's fair, don't you choir boy?" Varric gave the prince a hard look, daring him to disagree.

Sebastian looked at Anders and then nodded, "Agreed."

Anders clapped his hands together, "Now that we've settled on the fee, let's make plans and see what we'll need for the trip."

Gavin just gaped at Anders' sudden change in demeanor. He saw Sebastian gave him a look he couldn't describe and frowned. Before he could suggest he and the prince talk privately, Anders suddenly stood up while shaking his head. Without a word, the other mage left the room, the sound of his footsteps fading away rapidly.

"Okay, what was that all about?" Gavin asked.

Varric sighed, "Shall I tell them or you?"

Sebastian spoke slowly, choosing his words carefully. "Since you left, Anders has been spending a great deal of time off doing secret things. He won't even tell Varric what he's doing. He's also been talking more about mage freedom and mage rights and his manifesto."

"That again?" Gavin groaned.

"There's more," Varric said grimly. "It seems like he might be losing control of Justice."

"Venhedis!" Fenris swore. "He's finally become the abomination I've always knew he would be."

"What proof do you have of this?" Gavin asked. When they didn't answer right away he grumbled, "Your silence tells me the answer is none."

"No, we don't have definitive proof, but we felt you should know before we go tramping off into the mountains," Varric agreed. "Figured it'd be especially bad if you got caught by surprise. Broody here might accidently rip blondie's heart out and then we'd be stuck without a healer."

Sebastian laughed and held up his hands at the affronted look on Gavin's face. "I know you can heal, but you haven't spent your whole life perfecting that particular talent like Anders has. Without knowing what we're getting ourselves into, we can't afford to not include him."

"We'll just have to deal with his mood swings and Justice if he makes an appearance," Varric stated simply, like it was no big deal.

Anders chose that moment to return, looking a little sheepish. "Uhm, sorry about that, had an urgent need to relieve myself."

"They told us Anders," Gavin said softly.

Anders shot them a look that was both angry and hurt. "Does it give you pleasure to bad mouth me to my friends? Have I done anything to endanger you or anyone else in this city?"

"Not yet," Sebastian grudgingly admitted.

"Anders, it's alright," Gavin said softly, gently laying a hand on the man's shoulder. "I am still your friend and I don't want you to hide these things from me. I know I haven't been there for you, but I am here now. I won't let you lose yourself to Justice. Promise."

"Gavin, he will put us at more risk than we already are," Fenris warned, earning a heated glare from Anders.

"No, he won't," Gavin retorted confidently, earning a beaming smile from the other mage.

"Okay, back to our plans now," Sebastian clapped his hands. "We need to make sure we have everything we need for this jaunt. We don't know what we're facing. It could be anything from a clan of mad dwarves to a Tevinter Magister with an army."

"Personally, I'm hoping for the former," Varric shuddered.

"Is there any possiblity of it being Danarius?" Fenris asked quietly.

"Don't know," the dwarf shrugged. "Best to be prepared for all possible dangers."

"You can never prepare for everything," Fenris spoke up. "That's one reason Danarius created me. He knew he would need a weapon that could counter different types of threats."

"He didn't need to use you in that manner," Gavin scowled. "He could have found another solution if he wanted to do. And if our paths ever do cross, I will make sure he regrets everything."

"Off topic here, thank you," Anders intruded. "If you want to remain undetected, then you need to leave the city tonight. I have a couple of contacts that can get us potions and things."

"And the smuggling trade is booming again, so I can see them for any armor or weapons we might need," Varric told them. "Looks like you will need some things," he finished, looking askance at Gavin's farmer clothes.

"Yeah, I sold everything but my staff when I left here last time," Gavin nodded.

Sebastian moved to head out, "I just need to get my armor and weapons, which I put in storage since, with you gone, I found I no longer needed them. I also need to make arrangements for someone to take over my charitable duties."

Just like that, Gavin and Fenris found themselves alone once more. "We should probably try to get some sleep before we head out," Gavin said as he removed his boots before stretching out.

Fenris copied him and soon was curled up against him. "I know what you learned today upset you, but I hope you don't blame yourself for it. We all are responsible for our own fates. Just because others choose to sit by and wait for someone to fix their problems, doesn't mean we should do so."

"But, what if as Champion I could have made things better?" Gavin wondered.

"The only way to help the poor is to change the way nobles look at them," Fenris snorted. "I know, as does Sebastian, that it isn't likely to happen. The majority of those with power and money will do anything to keep it. Those who might have sympathy are far too few to be able to support anything you might try. At most, you might be able to make small changes, but that isn't what they need. Anything else would take years to accomplish, and I know that you don't want that."

"I'm so glad I have your support," Gavin kissed him gently on the lips.

"Always love, always," Fenris smiled back.