Double update for Easter! Click back a chapter if you came straight here.
85. Spiral
It's the same. Every hour, day, week, month, year; it's all the same. They're a broken record, continually skipping along on the same notes. It's routine, mechanical. A set of mindless actions to go through so that they don't have to think. They have their parts and they play them well.
Push. Taunt. Tease. Scream. Pull. Hurt. Accuse. Betray. Enrage.
They ache to come together and force themselves apart. It's a loop that they've been stuck in since the day they met and nothing can pull them out of it. At their cores, they're both men of logic, and this thing between them is too instinctive, too primal to really trust. So they don't. Instead they just keep going and going, terrified that there might be more.
More. Always more. More feeling. More wanting. More needing. More craving. More yearning.
More to life.
More to lose.
Carlton's been left too many times and Shawn can never bring himself to stay. So they fall back into the same cycle, endlessly circling each other, and neither makes a move.
Kristin: It seems like the more I write, the more uncertain I feel about the results. I'm not sure what corner of my brain this came from. If it sucks as badly as I'm afraid it might, I'm going to pretend I had nothing to do with it. Comments? Please?
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