71. Obsession

Chad flung open the mansion's front door and leapt into the room. "I have a package for you, my love," he said with a twisted smile. "It is...me!"

Corrine gasped from her-beautifully-sprawled position on her sofa, where she'd collapsed ten minutes ago after she'd learned that her mother was actually the evil twin of her birth mother and had stolen her away because she thought that her sister was too stupid to raise a child if she was running around getting knocked up by bipolar rodeo clowns.

"No! It is not possible! We killed you! I helped to dump your lifeless, yet still strangely attractive, body in the well!" Corrine exclaimed.

"Ah!" Chad proclaimed, lifting his arm dramatically, his finger pointed at the ceiling. "But what you do not know is that before I was a simple delivery boy, I was a grizzly bear trainer and became very adept at playing dead! And before that, I was a pearl diver, and am capable of holding my breath for several minutes! And now I have returned for you, Corrine! You haunt me constantly, whether I am asleep or awake! I shall make you pay for your crimes against me, and in doing so I shall make you mine!"

Corrine gasped again, pressed a well manicured hand against her heaving bosom, and stumbled away from the sofa. "No!"

"Yes!"

"No!"

"Yes!"

"Shawn, what are you doing?"

"Oh, hey buddy!"

Gus stood in the office doorway, his gaze flickering between a manically grinning Shawn, the Barbie and Ken dolls on his desk, and the dozen or so empty Red Bull cans scattered on the floor.

On second thought...

Gus turned and walked back out to his car without another word, pretending that he couldn't hear Shawn's cries of "Gus! Come back! I need you to be the butler! He's a paraplegic sociopath, Gus! You were made to play this part! Gus!"

Kristin: In my head, this is so totally canon. Seriously. You have no idea. And yes, all those exclamation marks really were necessary...

Gah, I'm feeling so completely unmotivated to work on any of the stuff that's going moldy on my hard drive. Right now I have Lassie/Jules friendship, Jules dream prompt that I borrowed*coughstolecough* from gnbrules(who is totally awesome and if you aren't reading her stuff, you should be), Gus gets the girl (GGtG!), Gus learns about Shassie, and preseries Shawn and Lassie interaction fics in various degrees of completeness getting all dusty while I sit and spend my increasingly rare spare time trolling the internet for Reid/anyone male fic that I haven't read a thousand times already. (Gubler is yummy beyond belief based on his hands and lower lip alone, but I just can't picture Reid with anyone female, which is a little strange since I usually adopt a fairly lax 'anything goes' attitude when it comes to shipping.) I could try combing through the Psych archives for a creative jumpstart, but I really try to limit how much I read in a fandom if I'm also writing in it. It's just way too easy for me to be influenced by other writers and one of my biggest goals when I write is to stay as original as I possibly can.

Anyway, before I spun completely off topic, I was going to ask if anyone has a preference on what I finish next, since at least half of my problem with finishing the fics is my apparent inability to pick which one to work on first.

As always, feedback-even negative, so long as it's constructive-is welcome and appreciated.

Update: So, I just wrote my very first Criminal Minds fic and I blame it entirely on this ridiculously long, rambling author's note. If you're into that fandom, please check it out and let me know what you think.

PeanutTree-Thank you! I think I can safely say that absolutely everything I've ever written that could be classified as smutty is in this collection, so that should tell you how little experience I have with it. But one of the reasons I decided to do this was to push myself out of my comfort zone, so...yeah. *laughs* I'd say I'm doing pretty well on that front. There's a whole big thing in my head about how Lassie knew how to pick up the girl at the club, but I might end up writing some of it up, so I don't want to say too much about it. The very short version is that his college roommate was a player and Lassie has always paid attention to things that he thinks might come in handy.

44/100