Dearest readers: What is the episode where Tony is being Tony and Gibbs is out of head-slapping range so he throws a wad of paper at the back of DiNozzo's head instead? Thanks!
Question Two: Boxes 452 and 494? Any diehard MW fans out there?
One half hour later, Tony and McGee headed into the bank.
"C'mon McMIT! What do you mean you can't count cards?" Tony exclaimed loudly as they entered through the bank's sophisticated revolving doors. The two bank employees who had not yet clocked out for lunch immediately sat back in their chairs, ready to help the new customers.
"What are you doing, Tony?" McGee hissed to his partner.
"I'm building our cover story. Did you want to walk in without saying anything? Can you spell suspicious?" Tony hissed back. He raised his voice and continued.
"I mean, I'd bet you've seen 21 like a dozen times, right? Brings back memories of the old alma matter?"
"Tony, I don't know how to count cards," McGee returned.
Tony leaned his elbow on the counter and fixed the pretty teller with a true DiNozzo-smile.
"He can't count cards! Can you believe that…Amanda?" he asked after leaning in to read her nametag.
"That's illegal, sir," Amanda replied, fixing Tony with a disapproving look of her own.
"It can't be that hard," Tony turned back to McGee. "Alan Garner could do it after reading one book and he won, like, 80 grand."
"That's why it's called 'fiction', Tony," McGee countered. "And I don't need to count cards to win in Vegas. I have natural talent."
"Yeah, sure—" Tony began before he was cut-off by Amanda who had been eying the clock impatiently for the last minute.
"Sir, can I help you with something? Otherwise I would really like to go on my lunch break."
"Why, yes, you can. My name is Stringfellow Hawke and I would like to see the contents of my safety deposit box. One of my coworkers just passed her citizenship exam and we are taking her to Vegas to celebrate. I was hoping McMaverick here would win us some extra cash to make the celebration extra special," he added, sending a flirtatious wink the teller's way.
She sighed heavily. "I can have Ryan here show you to your safety deposit box. Now, can I see some form of ID?"
Tony pulled the fake ID from his back pocket and handed it to her. She thoroughly examined it, even holding it up to the light to examine the micro-printing.
"Were you named after the character in Airwolf?" she questioned eagerly, looking up from the ID. "It was my dad's favorite show," she added as handed back the license, looking away embarrassed.
"Well, actually Donald P. Bellisario is my godfather. Some might say he named the character after me; others have said I'm just like him: brave, ruggedly handsome, single…" Tony added with a pointed look in Amanda's direction.
Oh please, McGee thought, putting forth a superhuman effort to avoid rolling his eyes. He wasn't sure how much more he could take of this before he ruined their whole mission by vomiting in disgust. Good thing it was time for his portion of the plan.
"Is there a restroom around?" he asked Amanda.
"If you go off to the left, take the first right, then another left, and it's the first door on your right," she replied. "It's kinda hard to find…"
As McGee headed off, she turned back to Tony. "Wow! I would have never guessed. So, you're, like, rich, right?"
"Well…" Tony trailed off with a shrug. The gesture was intended to display his humility, and apparently was received as such.
"I can see your parents raised you a gentlemen," Amanda said while nodding thoughtfully. "Most of the people who come in here only talk about how much they have in their bank account and brag about the latest clothes they've bought and who they had lunch with…I've never seen you in here before—it's a breath of fresh air, trust me!"
"I'm so sorry, Amanda," Tony interrupted after a quick glance at the clock. "I'm flattered you feel that way about me, and I've really enjoyed talking with you, but our flight leaves in less than two hours. I really need to get into my safety deposit box."
"Of course," she motioned hurriedly to Ryan, who was hovering a short distance away. "I hope you find everything to your liking, Mr. Hawke," she finished, giving Tony a coy smile.
"Thank you for your help, Amanda," Tony called over his shoulder as he was led away.
After a maze of turns that even Tony had a hard time remembering, Ryan paused in front of the handprint scanner and key card reader.
"Robert Ryan and Mr. Stringfellow Hawke," he announced to an unseen camera as he placed his hand on the scanner.
"The viewing room is just across the hall. If you'll wait in there while I bring you the box."
"I don't think so." Tony grabbed Ryan's arm and spun the security guard around. He put Ryan in a chokehold, reaching down with his other arm to keep him from reaching for his gun.
"Don't struggle—you'll make it worse. I'm not going to kill you," Tony hissed in Ryan's ear, trying to avoid the flailing arms Ryan was throwing in an attempt to dislodge his attacker. With a sudden burst of energy, Ryan threw himself backward, smashing Tony into the nearest wall. Tony gasped as the air was forced out of his lungs, but somehow managed to keep his forearm pressed tightly around Ryan's trachea.
Tony was counting the passing seconds in his head, knowing that ten seconds of continued pressure was enough to make the person lose consciousness. And more than that, and you ran the risk of killing the person you were innocently trying to incapacitate. At nine seconds, Tony was starting to worry slightly since Ryan was still flailing wildly. At ten seconds, Ryan bucked backwards, but not as strongly as before, his newest move not even knocking Tony off his feet. The Senior Field Agent countered by slightly tightened his grip and continuing to count the seconds with grim determination.
Finally, Ryan went limp. Tony released his grip on the unconscious security guard, letting him fall unceremoniously to the floor. Breathing hard, he quickly searched the guard, relieving the guard of his gun, walkie talkie and key ring before handcuffing Ryan and dragging the body in the vault.
He paused for a second, noting that the room had been redecorated since he'd last been there. In fact, the new design looked vaguely familiar…he mused as he pulled out his phone and dialed McGee. While the call was connecting, he remembered, mainly because that episode of Magnum, P.I. had been on over the weekend. The bank vault was a carbon copy of the one in which Thomas Magnum and Sue Remington (played by Carol Burnett) had been trapped overnight! "Rembrandt's Girl"—good episode. One of his favorites next to "Home From the Sea" and "Did You See the Sunrise Part One".
He tapped his foot impatiently as McGee's phone rang, rang…and rang. After the fifth ring, he started to get worried again. Why wasn't the Probie picking up? There should have been only one guard in the security room, usually some graying, semi-retiree on Medicare, that McUppercut should have KO'd easily…
"McGee! You in position?" Tony sighed with relief as the younger man came on the line.
"What do you think Tony?" McGee panted. He was sitting in the security office, with the unconscious security guard bound and gagged on the floor in front of him. He placed the phone in the crook of his neck, allowing him to erase the last few minutes of security footage and stop the cameras from transmitting.
"Where are Ziva and Gibbs?"
"They just entered." As McGee watched, Ziva and Gibbs entered the bank and quietly locked the door behind them. While they approached the counter, Ricky lagged back and began lowering the shades one by one.
"Can I help you?" McGee heard Amanda ask.
"I need you to relax," Gibbs told Amanda.
"Why?" she asked, a confused expression on her face.
"Because of this," Ziva stated from behind Amanda, having stealthily slipped around the counter. She gently pressed the pressure points on Amanda's neck before the teller could sound the silent alarm. Gibbs came around the counter to assist Ziva in gently lowering the bank employee to the floor.
"Freeze! Hands in the air!" Gibbs and Ziva looked up to see a third guard training his gun on them. Said guard had come around the corner a few seconds ago to find two intruders standing over Amanda's fallen body. Needless to say, he'd pulled his gun. The elderly man turned his head slightly to speak into his walkie talkie.
"I wouldn't do that if I were you," Gibbs spoke up, taking a step toward the guard as he and Ziva raised their hands into the air. "We're not here to hurt anyone."
"Like hell you're not. Look at Amanda!"
"She's unconscious, but otherwise unharmed," Gibbs replied, taking another step forward.
"Unconscious, but otherwise unharmed, my ass," the guard mocked before abruptly turning serious. "Stop moving! Do you want to get shot today?" Gibbs grinned internally, remembering that very morning when he had told Tony almost exactly the same thing. The words hadn't worked then either…
"Just hand over your gun and we promise not to hurt you," Gibbs said, obeying the guard's orders and stopping abruptly.
The guard's gun wavered for a moment as if deciding whether to shoot the intruders. Suddenly, a crashing noise was heard and the guard collapsed to the ground. Gibbs lunged for the gun, picking it up and training it on the guard who remained motionless. Ricky stood a few feet away, a box of pamphlets raised over his head for another blow if necessary.
"It's about time," Gibbs huffed, motioning with the gun toward the vault. Ricky made a face at Gibbs before following him deeper into the bank.
The three cleared each of the rooms they came across. The only other person who hadn't left for lunch was the branch manager who was sitting in the back, hunched over his computer and lost in his own world. He, too, was rendered unconscious in seconds, courtesy of the former Mossad liaison's extensive training.
They found Tony was in the vault, sorting through the guard's massive key ring, grinning widely when he located the correct pass card.
"You ready to work your magic?" Tony asked McGee over the phone as Ziva crouched next to the box, her lockpicking tools ready.
Gibbs stood on the other side of the small room, ready to empty the box into the burlap bag he had found in his trunk. Tony had a smart-ass quip about 'always being prepared' on the tip of his tongue, but he refrained from saying it aloud, knowing what was at stake if they couldn't meet Mason's demands.
Ricky stood at the door to the vault, unarmed, but watching for any loyal employees who might cut their break short. Gibbs' other job was to keep an eye on the henchmen. Unfortunately, they needed him to watch the hallway, but no one on the team trusted him with a gun.
McGee remained silent, conveying his 'what do you think?' expression with slight annoyance.
"Just asking. Sheesh," Tony muttered as he located the correct console. "All right, McCrabby. Box 452," Tony ordered, swiping the card as Ziva began to pick the lock.
"It is done," Ziva stated in less than minute, pulling the box from the wall. She opened the case and stared in awe at the massive diamonds that were artistically arranged on black leather. Her fingers itched to take the diamonds and examine their intrinsic beauty: she had not seen such perfectly cut diamonds since her childhood in Israel. Unfortunately, this was neither the time nor the place for such an action.
"That's impressive even for you, Zee-vah." Tony complimented as he took the box from Ziva and handed it to Gibbs. The Lead Agent emptied the gems into his sack before carefully replacing #452.
"Well, that was easy," Tony deadpanned. "Lock 'er up, McGee, and 'open sesame' box number 494."
"Yes, your highness," McGee replied snidely as he unlocked box 494. He had been on the team for six, almost seven years now. Would it kill Tony to treat him like an equal? He had been on the team for six, almost seven years, now. Then, McGee remembered how he'd acted when Sarah was accused of murder, and relented a little in his analysis of Tony, remembering how fiercely loyal the Senior Field Agent was to those about whom he truly cared. It was just Tony's way, McGee decided. Like it or not.
Breaking into safety deposit box 494 was much easier than box 452. Ziva yanked the box from the wall in under thirty seconds, a personal best. She smiled smugly and handed the box to Gibbs, who lifted the lid and poured its contents into the sack as well.
"Now the vault," Gibbs stated redundantly.
Ziva inspected the combination lock with the 90-digit dial. She put her ear against the door and twirled the dial experimentally. She frowned and pulled away from the door, examining the hinges and the handle.
"Don't 'spose any of you have Stella Bridger on speed dial?" Tony asked hopefully, interpreting the silence as a sign that Ziva couldn't pick the lock. No one responded, but Gibbs raised his eyebrows questioningly. Tony shrugged slightly in response, knowing the intention behind his small joke wasn't wasted on his boss.
"Can you narrow down the possibilities any, McGee?" Ziva questioned, returning to the dial. "I could give it a slot but it will take some time."
McGee pondered Ziva's question for a minute while debating whether to correct her or not. He shook his head, deciding it wasn't the time for English 101. He sighed heavily, out of ideas. He deciding to try his free-writing, or in this case free-thinking, technique. Hopefully among the stream of consciousness and other uncensored ideas, a useful plan would emerge.
McGee took a few deep breaths, resting the palms of his hands on the desk in front of him and planting his feet firmly on the ground. He relaxed his entire body and let his thoughts flow: English 101…school…Kody Meyers? Eureka!
His fingers flew over the keyboard as pulled up footage from the last week. "I'll review the previous security footage and see if I can see part of the combination," he called excitedly, manipulating the images to focus solely on those times in which the vault was opened or closed. He zoomed in on the footage, squinting to read the numbers on the tiny dial.
"Try 82-33-67-54-3-27-99-and…" he stopped speaking as an employee stepped in front of the dial, blocking the last digit.
Ziva paused, her fingers hovering over the dial. "What is the last number, McGee?"
"I…I don't know. There was only one day where the dial can be seen from the camera and the employee's blocking it. Can't you do it?"
Ziva sighed. She had not been forced to pick such a high quality combination lock in a long time, but hopefully it was like that stupid American idiom about riding a bike. "I will try my best."
She pressed her ear tightly against the safe and began slowly turning the dial. Gibbs, Tony and Ricky held their breath as she worked, not wanting to disrupt her in any way.
The seconds ticked by like hours. Just when Tony's lungs were aching for air, there was an audible click. Ziva yanked down on the door handle and swung open the heavy door. Everyone paused for a second, staring in amazement at the stacks of money that were sitting invitingly on large shelves.
Gibbs brought his group back to attention. "Ten thousand dollars. Non-sequential bills. Let's get going."
Team Gibbs worked methodically while Ricky continued to guard the door. Tony and Ziva would pull a few random bills from a pile of money before discarding it while Gibbs carefully counted the money as he placed it into the sack.
"9,980. 9,990. 10,000. Wrap it up," Gibbs announced twenty minutes later as he threw the last bill into the bag.
"Very good Agent Gibbs!" he heard a voice croon from behind him. Gibbs spun around at the sound of Mason's voice.
Mason had entered the room, gun drawn. He and another accomplice were standing behind Kenzie and Franks, using the law enforcement as human shields. Both Kenzie and Franks were tightly bound and gagged, and neither of them looked happy to be in their current positions.
Ziva who was standing slightly out of Mason's line of sight, subtly bent, reaching for her gun.
"I wouldn't, Miss David," Mason barked, suspecting the Mossad assassin's intentions. "Why don't you and Agent DiNozzo throw out your guns, and come out of the vault with your hands raised, instead? It'll do your friends some good." He poked his gun sharply into Kenzie's kidney, causing him to let out a small cry of pain.
Tony's heart sank as he recognized his partner's tone. He glanced at Ziva, who nodded her unhappy disapproval. They bent slowly and placed their guns on the floor, sliding them out of the vault before exiting with hands up.
"You too, Agent Gibbs," Mason crooned. Gibbs raised himself to his feet, despite the sudden throbbing in his bad knee which unfortunately had stiffened while he had been counting the money.
Mason paused and turned his head slightly to look into the hallway. He grinned widely, returning his gaze to the room. Tony, Gibbs and Ziva only had a moment to wonder about what was making Mason so joyful before Ricky hurled an unconscious body into the room. McGee crashed to the floor, bleeding from a large cut above his ear. Ricky, who was grinning as well, took his place beside Mason and trained McGee's gun on Team Gibbs.
Mason and the unnamed associate shoved Kenzie and Franks forward so they were aligned with their friends. Mason began to cackle evilly as he stared at the group lined up infront of him.
"Now, let the fun begin."
Thanks for reading! Reviews always appreciated!