Again this chapter moves straight on from the last and I'm sorry but it's all going down-hill very quickly for the pair. We also meet Reno in this one so watch out for him in future chapters.

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Making mistakes

Why? Why had he done it? Why had he let himself be exposed like that?

Cloud knew why, knew it was because Zack had asked him to open up, had reassured him it would be ok. But it wasn't ok, it had been anything but ok and now the pain was worse. Cloud bit back the tears which burned his eyes, not wanting to let the world see the weakness their presence portrayed. Anger burned a hole so deep within him it felt as if his heart had been consumed within the inferno, his chest seizing up at the searing pain which the heat caused as it tore through him. He couldn't breathe, couldn't think, couldn't function beyond the need to get away.

The cadet didn't even know where he was anymore as his feet carried him on auto pilot through the compound away from everyone and towards the safety of the shadows. There were places he knew of, secret corners where he could disappear, a few small sanctuaries of darkness to hide within in this horrible world. Cloud bit back the sob which filled his throat and turned it into rage, added it to the fire and let the extra fuel power his movements.

Hate blossomed within him now and it was so much stronger than he had ever felt before. He had hated this place, hated the people who hurt him, hated the weakness within himself. Zack's care had dampened that emotion, given it some peace in his aching soul, but now that hate was alive once more and it had only one target. The cadet felt his insides go cold, the white hot fire having destroyed everything and leaving his body hollow for ice to fill the void. He closed his mind off to the soldier, the man who was supposed to be his friend, the man who had only hours ago confessed love for him. The blonde's body shook as the knowledge settled in his mind, as he realised that this wasn't what love was about. Cloud didn't know much about love, but he knew this was not how it was supposed to feel. Love was about caring for and protecting a person, about giving your heart and soul, not weakening them with promises and then tearing them apart.

If Zack really loved him then he wouldn't doubt what they had, wouldn't have questioned Cloud's feelings, wouldn't have asked him to open up and then be suspicious of everything he had ... confessed.

Cloud nearly choked on the air as it entered his body in a sudden gasping breath. Oh Gaia, he had confessed to loving the soldier, had taken comfort in the man's arms, but now he was alone again and even more exposed than he had been before.

The cadet was so caught up in his own silently venting despair that he didn't notice the Turks walking towards him. He didn't move aside or even pause as he stormed right through them, knocking both out of his way as he pushed past.

"HEY!" the red head shouted after him "Who the hell do you think you are?"

Cloud stopped then, his body responding to the voice, joyfully finding a target to vent this suffocating rage upon. He turned and levelled seething blue orbs on angry green and a cruel smile twisted at the corners of his mouth.

"Reno leave it" the blonde haired women beside him said, her hand on the man's arm to keep him by her side.

"No it ain't Elaina, the runt needs to learn respect"

"Respect, you're a Turk, you don't deserve respect" Cloud taunted, his voice cruel and unusual even to himself.

"Why you ..." Reno said through gritted teeth, pulling at Elaina's grip

"You are clearly upset about something cadet, so I will let that one go, but do not question us like that again" the blonde Turk warned, her voice tight and controlled.

Cloud saw it then, knew the weakness of the pair lay within the red head and he couldn't wait to unleash the furry which was held within that man. He could see it co clearly, the tension in the Turk's body, the need to destroy burning in his eyes. The cadet needed that as well, need to have someone to fight against, someone to make suffer and make his pain physical in return.

"Gonna let a girl fight for you" the blonde asked, his voice full of bitter arrogant amusement.

Reno was on him in a second, Elaina's grip easily escaped, and Cloud welcomed the fight with open arms. He tried to fight back and let the darkness guide him as fists flew, but it was no surprise that he didn't stand a chance. Turks were famous for what they did, they were both feared and revered for their skill and right now the cadet was at this one's mercy. He dodged a couple of blows, but as soon as one made contact he knew he had lost. The pain shot through his chest forcing air from his lungs and he welcomed the stabbing ache he brought. Another blow to his side ripped a cry from his throat as he felt ribs crack within him, but again he welcomed the scorching pain that came with it. Several blow's more and a well placed kick to his legs had the blonde on the floor in moments, the world swimming in beautiful colours as his body screamed in agony, the taste of blood filling his mouth.

"Reno stop!" a distant voice shouted and Cloud blinked slowly at the sound.

He didn't want the Turk to stop, he wanted the red head to finish what he had started, wanted the man to do what Cloud himself had been unable to do that day in the shower. He tried to speak then, tried to force another insult from his lips, but instead only ended up choking on his own blood. The coughing brought waves of pain to his chest and the blonde smiled as the darkness moved forward obscuring the edges of his world. Such sweet darkness, how he had missed it.

"Zack, what the hell man" Reno shouted at the soldier, as he was roughly pulled away from the cadet at his feet.

"Cloud! Cloud can you hear me?"

Reno blinked for a second observing the scene as it unfolded, watching as his friend began to crack in front of him, the soldier frantically calling out to the cadet and trying to get a response from the semiconscious blonde. This was not the Zack he knew, not the fun loving soldier who he went out drinking with, the smiling joyful man who always got into trouble with him.

"Zack?" he asked again, confused and worried by the soldier's state.

"What did you do?" Zack's words were strained and laced with pain, and Reno actually felt his heart clench at the sight.

"The grunt was ... he was .." the Turk babbled unable to find the words.

"The cadet was disrespectful and challenged Reno to a fight, it is not completely Reno's fault" Elaina cut in evenly.

Zack eyes flew up to hers and then back down to the cadets once again trying to get a response from the blonde

"Cloud?" he all but begged for the cadet to respond. "I'm sorry I shouldn't have doubted you like that."

"Cloud, that's Cloud" Reno gasped, the realisation of who the cadet was suddenly hitting him. "Shit Zack, I didn't know"

His eyes fell back down to the broken and bleeding figure at his feet and guilt swam through him. It wasn't an emotion he was used too, one a Turk couldn't afford the luxury of having, and it hurt.

"I swear if I had known I wouldn't have done it, but the kid gave me attitude and was asking for a fight."

"He's upset" Zack growled in defence of the blonde.

"Maybe, but he did antagonise Reno" Elaina pointed out calmly.

"He wanted you to hurt him" Zack choked, the understanding of what had happened finally hitting home and hitting hard.

Cloud began to laugh now, his disorientated mind only vaguely able to understand the words Zack spoken, but knowing they were so very true. He did want pain, he wanted something he could see and touch and feel on his body, something to explain why he didn't want to breath anymore. The sound became almost hysterical and three pairs of eyes look down at him in fear.

It was Elaina who moved first, reaching forward and applying pressure to the cadet's neck. A second later the blonde slumped unconscious on the floor and the heart-stopping sound ceased, leaving a ghostly silence around them.

"What did you do?" Zack asked, his panicked state overriding his ability to think rationally.

"I merely applied pressure in the right place to render him unconscious."

"We should get him to the infirmary" Reno suggested, already aware that the damage he had caused would need medical treatment.

Cloud drifted peacefully now, an empty vessel floating on a black sea, the dark waves lapping against him gently rocking his damaged soul. He wanted to be in this place now, safe within the shadows of his own mind, the world he had created giving him peace and comfort once more. A presence made itself known and the cadet welcomed it, embraced it like a long lost friend, holding it tight to his chest.

"I'm sorry" the cadet breathed softly to the void and smiled when he felt it embrace him back.

This was their world, a place which they had created together, and it was beautiful. He knew that the voice had no body, no way to see as he did, but he knew that they shared the pleasure of this sight together. Cloud let himself go then, gave himself over to the hollow depths of his soul and together they watched as the light within him faded until only a faint glowing ember remained.

Cloud closed his eyes and let the presence console him, let it hold him close and sooth the hurt away, allowing all that he had become in Zack's care to be erased. The darkness smiled as the cadet slipped into a dreamless sleep in its arms and watched as the spark of hope began to die in the ashes of the blonde's heart.