The Fear Within
Ire
Cecil Havey was atypical, in many ways.
Everyone had to acknowledge it, for there was no denying the obvious physical evidence before them. He was a novelty, something he had always been vaugely aware of, whether it was for good or for ill. He knew the reasons, of course, regardless of whether or not he had been told them by the man who was, at least in part, responsible for this novelty.
His appearance was, of course, part of the reason. It was obvious by looking at him that he was not... your average young man. He was as pale as the moons, his skin possessing a certain luminescent beauty; a trait he did not particularly relish, being a young Knight-in-Training. To add to this, he had hair that women envied, though it was a sliver white; almost hoary, in his opinion it likened him to an eldery man. His lips held the constat apperance of one suffering from a hypothermic reaction to the cold, a pale blue color. On top of all this, Cecil had to deal with the fact that, according to his female peers, he had a beauty that they envied. Knights were not supposed to be beautiful - not even in the slightest.
This was only secondary in his mind to the concerns he habored about his origins, however. According to court rumor, which was seldom to never wrong about these sorts of things, he was the son of Cecilia, the once wife of the King who eloped with a bizzare man one night, never to be heard from again. If that was the case, and it most likely was, then Cecil had reason to believe that he was only in the palace becasue His Highness had known precisely who he was when he was discovered in the forest as a babe.
It was disheartening to know that he may only be here because he resembled his mother, that his highness may not be the man he thought him to be.
"You're brooding again, Cecil," it was Kain Highwind, fellow orphan and dear comrade.
"Am I?" he asked, running his hand through his hair absentmindedly.
"Yes," Kain waved in front of Ceci's face in an attempt to draw his friend's attention to other things. "Now, cease, before Rosa approaches and catches you. You do not want to worry her again, do you, Cecil?"
Cecil stared up at Kain from his seat at the long mess hall table, green eyes meeting amber eyes. Cecil sighed, and nodded, pushing himself up to stand with graceful fluididty. "Are we tardy to class again?"
"... Yes. You were daydreaming and missed the end of the mess period. I came to find you, not a hard task considering your dispostion," Kain joked, blowing a strand of blond hair away from his face.
"... You, my friend, can be an ass at times," Cecil frowned, standing as his friend laughed at him.
Kain said nothing, only stared at his friend amusedly before departing, Cecil easily keeping stride with the taller Kain. The two of them said nothing as they traversed down the halls of the elite Baron Military Academy, passing other students who whispered conspiratoraly as they passed.
Another thing that set Cecil apart were those whom he associated himself with.
Kain Highwind, the orphaned son of Highwind the Dragon Knight commander, was his best friend. He was here with Cecil having graduated in the same year, despite the fact that Cecil was a full year younger than Kain. He was connected to his father's Dragon, Fefnir. Fefnir had learned to trust both Cecil and Rosa through Kain's careful conditioning... but the Dragon was growing old and soon would perish.
Rosa Joanna Farrell was the only daughter of Widow Farrell, whose husband had died in the same battle as Kain's parents. Sir Farrell had been a Dark Knight, as Cecil aspired to be, to Rosa's great terror. She had heard first hand the horror stories of the terrible wounds that had been inflicted on her father by his own attacks. She was schooled in the Society of White Mages in able to be of service to her two Knights in Shining Armor; Kain and Cecil.
They were all without one or more parents - all without fathers - and thus united.
He knew, of course, that Kain and Rosa could be normal if they did not associate themselves with him. He knew he was the tumor that infected their social lives - the reason that they were outcasted. He wondered why they even bothered.
"Mr. Harvey, Mr. Highwind," the instructor, Sir Godwin, greeted dryly ", I'm glad you could join us."
Cecil moved silently to the back of the class while Kain took his seat at the front.
It was usually the policy of instructors to seperate them. Wise, considering that the two of them together had done such things as flood the entire first floor of the palace with water from the sewers. It wasn't as if they tried to cause mayhem, however, it just happened...
The next hour and a half passed very slowly, for Cecil was anticipating the free reign he and Kain would have of the training ground for the next several hours. The informative period was over, and then they could do as they pleased.
After class however, he was stopped by another of the students, eyes blazing. "Do you believe that you are so privalaged that you can waltz into class late whenever you want?"
Cecil said nothing, too shocked to think of a response, and so he stood, staring with a dumbfounded expression at his assailant.
"Do not let yourself get a swelled head, Harvey. His Highness may have brought you into his home, but you will never be anything other than the bastard son of his..."
His peer did not finish that statement.
In a fraction of a second, Cecil Harvey had the boy pined against the wall, his green eyes blazing with a righteous rage ", You... you will not say such things about my mother, you useless cur."
He was choking off his fellow student, and it took another three boys to peel him away from the boy who had so easily insulted him.
"Just because you think I am a certain way does not mean that I am," Cecil hissed. "You do not know me, and I do not know you, but your statement shows how ignorant you are."
The assailant was panting, grasping his neck and staring up at Cecil with terror.
"I do not like who I am. I am here becasue I am trying to prove myself worthy of His Majesty's gift," Cecil spat at his feet and turned away, pushing through the door and out into the abandon hallway, his heart full of bitter feelings.
Kain turned to the four students, gave them a dangerous look, and then spun on his hell to try and catch up with his friend. Rosa would hear about this later, if not from Cecil, then from himself.
"Cecil, slow down!" Kain reaced out, pulling on Cecil's sleeve in an attempt to stop him.
" ... ," Cecil glanced behind him, and Kain released his arm.
"Obviously, there's something deeper going on here," Kain stated cooly. "I've never known you to be so impulsive ... gullable, yes, but you always take the time to think things through."
"What he was going to say ... is true. My mother... she was ... disloyal," Cecil did not turn to Kain, had averted his gaze so that his friend could not see his shame. "I do not belong here. I am a bastard child, Kain."
Kain sighed ", For being so bright, you sure are a complete fool upon occassion. You said it yourself, did you not? You're not taking advantage of his majesty and you're here to prove yourself worthy of his gifts. If that is the case why, then , should your parantage matter?"
"... You... are right," Cecil laughed. " But... I am not who I always thought I was. Do you know how they stare at me? How ... out of place I feel? I question my humanity sometimes."
"... Well, I can't argue with that, but your looks aren't the only reason you catch people staring," Kain was smiling softly; he should have figured Cecil was just being Cecil."You... are an amazing swordsman. There is no one better in all of Baron. Many of the young men are jealous of you becasue you have the approval of the Masters, and you're only a first year."
Cecil turned around to stare at Kain in disbelief ", Are they truly that ... petty?"
"You bet they are," It was Rosa, running twoard them. "Now what did you do? We had a group of boys come in carrying one of their friends and complaining about a silver-haired menace."
"He insulted Ceci's mother, and Cecil got a bit... angry," Kain explained.