The guys mulled over the papers on the table, and drew up various scenarios for the next couple hours. I just sat listening, most of it going over my head. I like to think that I am an intelligent human being, with a good set of problem solving skills but all this gun talk was just making my head hurt. They stopped when they heard my stomach growl angrily.
"Gotta feed the beast." Les chuckled. "Why don't we go pick up something from Pino's?" He motioned towards Bobby and himself.
"Sure." Ranger stood and stretched, his black t-shirt rising slightly showing a peek of his tight abs. "Put it on my tab. I owe you guys more than lunch, but maybe it can be a good start."
"Sounds good to me." Bobby kissed the top of my head in passing. "You should probably lay down for a bit, or at least put your feet up. You are still healing and need rest."
I responded with a yawn.
"Beautiful, you need to let us when you start to feel drained. Sometimes talking about missions can get us sidetracked. You know boys and their toys." He smirked, and waved as he and Bobby strolled out the door.
"I have to make some phone calls." Diesel looked between Ranger and I before standing and heading towards the fire escape.
I watched as he pulled open the window and folded himself to get through. He staggered, almost tipping off the metal bracing before turning, giving me the thumbs up and shutting the window.
"Babe." Ranger's voice was soft. I turned to face him. "Can we just sit and talk for a bit?"
"Yeah." I stood and stretched, wincing slightly at the strain. He quickly rounded the table and placed his hand on my back, an almost nervous look on his face. "We can do it in my bedroom. I wanna lay down."
"Anything Babe." He followed me into my bedroom and watched me as I carefully climbed up into the bed and melted into the softness of the comforter. I looked up at him as he stood above me, biting the inside of his lip. I smiled, an insecure Ranger was cute.
"Come sit down." I patted the bed beside me, and adjusted the pillows so that I was in a reclining position. He slowly side next to me, watching my reaction as if I was going to change my mind and send him away. "Ranger, relax."
"I'm trying." He sighed, running his hands through his hair. "I'm conflicted and not confident around you right now. It's very confusing."
"Yeah." I rolled my eyes. "Tell me about it."
There was a long awkward pause. We just stared at one another. It felt like a horrible first date.
"Thank you." He said finally, reaching for my hand tentatively. I quirked an eyebrow. "You could have told me to fuck off. To never see you again. It's not like you wouldn't have reason. I just am thankful that you are willing to let me make it up to you."
"Ranger, you are human." I shook my head and flipped his hand over, running my fingers over the scars that pocked his palm. "Sometimes you fuck up. It's not like I have never done it myself."
"I know, but I expect more of myself. I never should have let my own insecurities and guilt get the better of me." He closed his eyes, enjoying the simple connection. "I hate that I let you down. I let my men down."
"Carlos." He opened his eyes at his name. "I have blown up your cars. I have gotten you shot, stabbed, and almost killed. I've cost you money, blood and I'm sure sanity. Not once did you ever push me away. Sure you were an asshole, but I can't expect you to be some infallible diety. You have a breaking point. It's nothing to be ashamed of. I just can't believe that it took this long for you to finally snap."
"I never blamed you for any of that."
"I know, and that is exactly what I mean." I took his face in my hands, turning towards him. "I am upset, and I have reason to be. But I am not going to hold it against you forever. I am not going to kick you out of my life because you needed to take a breather. How many times have I pushed you away?" I frowned. "How many times did you tell me to go to Morelli and I did it without question?"
"I never should have told you to do that." He pulled me into his lap wrapping his arms around me. "I never should have done a lot of things." He sighed. "I never wanted you with him. It killed me knowing that he had you. I was jealous, but I thought that you would see how broken I am and regret it."
"You're not broken." I sighed, pressing my forehead against his. "You are NOT broken."
"I have a lot of inner demons, Babe." He pulled back, took my face in his hands. "They have consumed me for years. I know that you think I'm Batman…some superhuman. But I'm not. I'm just some schmuck who pushed himself too hard and is having a hard time dealing with it."
"I know you aren't Batman." I smiled, leaning into his hand. "You are just mysterious. There is a dark shadow in your eyes. I know it's sadness. It's regret and guilt. It's anger and fear. Even with all that, you want to do the right thing. You helped me when you didn't have to. You pushed me to better myself. You gave me a new family of big bad asses." Ranger chuckled. "Pushing me to Morelli only worked because I was afraid of what I was feeling for you. You are not what I thought I would have in my life. You aren't the 'Burg' standard."
"That's for sure." He smiled and stroked my bottom lip with his thumb.
"It scared me that I could have such strong feelings for someone that I didn't know. Someone that was so different then what I knew. Someone who was so passionate and strong and loved me no matter what." A tear slipped down my cheek but was quickly wiped away by his thumb.
"Steph." He leaned forward, searching my face for approval. Instead I pressed my lips against his, wrapping myself around him. The kiss was sweet and loving, not lustful. Our lips sought out something deeper than just desire, deeper than the lust that drove most of our kisses. I could smell the Bulgari, taste the coffee on his lips and feel his strength as we kissed.
The sound of the front door brought us back to reality. We weren't breathless, but both let out a sigh at the loss of contact. Pushing back the hair that fell around my face, he smiled.
"You are the best thing in my life." I whispered, pressing my forehead to his again, breathing deeply.
"You are my life, Babe."
***Okay, so Steph and Ranger made up…we all knew it was going to happen. I hope this brings to light why she was so willing to accept his apology. Review, review review….they make me write faster. Plus, I love the input. ***