Of Praxians and Organic Felines: Chappie 2
A/N: *looks at reviews* (0_0) Oh. Oh my. *laughs incredulously* I'm gone for one day and the reviews are already way past the limit I set! Jya~ I guess you guys like it, ne? Thanks to everyone who reviewed and here's chappie 2 as promised! *blushes* Truthfully, I didn't expect so many reviews at once or I would've set a higher goal... *pouts* Now I really have to crack down on chappie three or there's going to be this huge wait.
Prowl: You should not protray it as a bad thing when you love it.
Owl: Urusai! I didn't ask for your opinion! Nya~ I hope you enjoy it!
Disclaimer: *looks at check list for life goals* Hmm... watch all the anime, rule the world... ah, here it is! "Own Transformers Franchise". Nope, still unchecked! Oh well!
Prowl: What does that say?
Owl: Which one?
Prowl: The subcatagory under "Own Transformers Franchise"... Does that say "genderbend Prowl"?!
Owl: O-of course not! Don't be s-stupid! You know what, LET'S GET ON WITH THE STORY!
Prowl: ...
Owl: Please Enjoy! And don't forget to review!
_No Game No LINE BREAK_
Prowl stifled an exhausted vent as he straightened from his half-slouched position over his datapads. The data-files accrued from this most recent battle was higher than usual, the power plant apparently having been the main source of energy for a nearby research facility. That facility had been testing sensitive material that required being kept at a regulated temperature in a controlled environment, which had only been possible because of the electricity generated by the power plant. The destruction of the power plant via Decepticon meant that type of control was impossible and they stood to lose millions in research material since the backup generators just couldn't cut it. So, obviously, they wanted the Autobots to fix it or give them money to compensate for the lost research.
He'd spent a good hour figuring out why and how the humans thought it was the Autobot's responsibility and finding a way out of it diplomatically. It took a great deal of his patience, but the fallout of the battle was managed in the end. Then it was on to his normal data-work for the day… another forty six 'pads that he almost swore multiplied when he looked away.
He bent forward again, curling his back in a stretch, his doorwings fluttering in relief after being still for so long. He stood, arms stretching above his helm as he worked the kinks out of his frame. Chronometer reading 0150, Prowl decided to check that Jazz and twins had kept to his rules. Clearing his desk and subspacing a few unfinished 'pads for later, Prowl made his way out of his office and to the security room.
Prowl swiftly made his way to Red Alert's domain, but paused in the doorway, the rare sight of a quietly recharging Red Alert leaning against an awake Inferno startling him momentarily. Inferno glanced at him, a gentle smile on his face, and Prowl nodded in acknowledgement of the mech. Inferno turned back to the monitors as his superior silently made his way over, the empty cubes of high-grade not going unnoticed by the Praxian.
"I take it you encouraged Red Alert to relax?" Prowl spoke softly, though his attention was on the monitors, specifically the ones of the rec. room.
"Yeah," Inferno was just as quiet. "He kinda needed it."
Prowl hummed in agreement. The security director had seemed a bit stresses of late… well, more so than usual. His optics widened a bit as he took in the scene, and he pushed down the urge to face-palm, a human gesture that was becoming far too useful as of late.
"… Is there a reason Bumblebee is where a rubber chicken on his helm?" Prowl couldn't keep the disbelief out of his tone as he asked the first question that came to mind as he watched the monitors.
Inferno chuckled, "I've got no idea what goes on inside a minibot's mind, and considerin' they were all playin' a game early that resulted in tha'… I really don't think I want to."
Prowl twitched a wing in agreement. It looked like they'd kept to his curfew, but had gone all out on everything they could in retaliation. He spotted his brothers in a corner of the rec. room; however, he paused again as he took in their terrified postures. Something had scared them, and badly, but they hadn't comm.d him or anything. The other's surrounding them look confused, but slightly scared as well…
Prowl concluded that they were just overcharged and had probably spooked themselves. It was known to happen. Primus knows his brothers could spook themselves for no reason while sober. And they were supposed to be the older ones… He was mildly disturbed as he watched Jazz grin as he discussed something with the twins, but the black and white Praxian decided that he'd seen enough and that his rules had been followed as he watched all the remaining mechs head off to their quarters (or at least the ones that were conscious). Spotting an unopened cube sitting in front of the monitors, he picked it up with a slight warning glance to Inferno, but said nothing as he walked back to his own quarters.
He vented in relief as the door swooshed closed behind him and decided to unwind a bit before recharge with the high-grade and a book file. After all, it wasn't like anybot was around to see him relax.
_Contently Incoherent LINE BREAK_
Jazz onlined the next morning with a pained groan. Last night's party had been awesome, and he knew something he'd discovered something hilarious... Unfortunately, everything past midnight was a fuzzy blur and he couldn't remember what. The throbbing in his helm worsened when he tried to think. Before any major deductions could be made, he needed to fix that. Luckily for him, he'd long ago borrowed Ratchet's little secret cure…
One hangover cure later, Jazz bounced out of his room and towards the rec. room with his usual enthusiasm, an upbeat track providing excellent background music. Many a mech up and about glared at him for it. With a twirl, he burst through the door just as the song ended, narrowly avoiding colliding with a scowling Ironhide.
"Morning, 'Hide!" Jazz grinned, neatly avoiding a cuff to the back of his helm.
"Ya're way too happy. It's burnin' mah optics." The old warrior growled as he stalked out of the room. Jazz just laughed as he made his way to the dispenser.
He spotted a scowling Sideswipe in a corner booth, the red frontliner nursing his own cube of energon, and decided to begin the investigation with his fellow Party Planning mech. The saboteur almost hesitated when a dark glower was shot his way as he made his way over, but ignored it with all the casual smoothness that came with being the Jazz-man.
"Hey, Siders, Ah got a question for ya..." Jazz started only to be interrupted by a dark growl.
"Jazz, if you don't get your sorry aft outta here with that music, I will-"
"Nahahah, Siders! No need ta get violent! Remember, Sunny's da mean one in da viewer's minds! Ah'll turn it down," Jazz raised his servos in a calming manor as he switched his music to a lower volume, sliding into a seat opposite the other mech. "But seriously, Ah do wanna know somethin'..."
Sideswipe groaned, "Jazz, I have a patrol in less than ten breems that I totally forgot about until Prowl comm.d me to remind me. And I have a hangover from the Pit. I don't have the time or patience to deal with your randomness."
"Wow, ya really are grumpy! Luckily for you, Ah got somethin' ta deal wit da little problem ya got..." Jazz took a vial of glowing orange sludge out of his subspace. "Took some mahself when Ah got up. Ah'll give it ta ya if ya help meh wit mah investigation..."
"Oh, Primus, that stuff looks nasty! Wait... is that what I think it is?"
"Ratchet's super-secret hangover cure tha' he guards wit da viciousness of a rabid scraplet? Yep, sure is," Jazz grinned as Sideswipe's revolted look faded into something akin to shocked awe.
"You know his recipe? I don't know whether I should praise your skills or make fallout plans for when Ratchet learns you broke into his files..."
"So, do ya want it or not?" Jazz held out the vial to Sideswipe.
"Yeah, yeah," Sideswipe downed the orange sludge in one go, trying not to grimace, "Frag, that slag is nasty! ...So, what is it you wanted to ask me?"
"Ah was wonderin' if ya remember what happened last night, specifically, sometime after midnight. Ah'm havin' trouble wit defragging da memory files right now, but there's this naggin' feelin' that Ah had a really good idea..."
Sideswipe frowned, "I know what you mean. I woke up feeling like that, too... I remember it had something to do with Bluestreak... Grr, I can't think of what it was!" Sideswipe smacked himself in frustration.
"Blue, huh? Tha' sounds right..." Jazz tilted his helm as he thought. Optics narrowed behind his visor as he tried to piece together what it was that was bothering him. "Ah think it had something to do wit his... doorwings?"
Sideswipe's helm snapped up, "That's it! Purring! Praxians purr when their doorwings are pet!" He chuckled. "I still think that's hilarious..."
Jazz laughed as he finally remembered what had been bugging him, but stopped when he recalled the strange reaction Smokescreen and Bluestreak had had when Prowler had been mentioned.
"What do ya think was wit da freak out when Prowler was brought up?"
Sideswipe paused, "I have no idea..."
Jazz grinned, "Ah think Ah wanna find out."
"Jazz... do you think it's really a good idea with the way they looked? I really don't wanna find out the hard way that ends with a trip to the Hatchet or the brig... or both." Sideswipe grimaced.
"Nah, Ah think Ah need to go a bit undercover for this one... met meh in da place after yer patrol to help meh plan?"
"Do ya need to ask, Jazz-man?" Sideswipe and Jazz shared devious grins before the red mech left for his patrol. Jazz chuckled to himself.
A gleam of glowing red from a ventilation shaft in the rafters went unnoticed as a small metal figure swiftly made its way out of the Autobot base with this new bit of information...
_Evilly Laughing LINE BREAK_
Megatron was lounging on his throne, growling to himself about the Decepticon's latest defeat. His loyal third, Soundwave, was hovering over the main console of the Nemesis and trying to find a decent target for the next raid that he would need to subtly coerce his esteemed leader into attacking... hopefully with a strategy better than "take all energon sources before the Autobots show up to kick our collective afts". Not that Soundwave thought his esteemed lord's plans where horrible... No, nothing like that. They could just use some more –planning of actual plans- involved when making them.
Soundwave looked up when he sensed his cassette, Lazerbeak, swiftly making his way to him. Moving toward the door just as it opened, he held up one arm for the avian-type cassette to land on. Soundwave vaguely registered his lord straightening on the throne as he considered his creation.
"Lazerbeak: return." Soundwave commanded calmly, not giving away the rising interest in the bot's report as the little spy sent over as much as he could through their bond.
"Wait, Soundwave," Megatron rumbled, "I wish to hear his report personally. It must be important if he left his post. Or at least it better be..." the Decepticon leader growled darkly.
Soundwave nodded his acknowledgement as Lazerbeak's plating shifted minutely at the threat from their lord. Sending a calming pulse down their connection, Soundwave encouraged the cassette to replay the conversation he'd overheard.
As soon as the clip began to play, Soundwave was quick to identity the Autobots speaking as the frontliner Sideswipe and the saboteur Jazz. "I know what you mean. I woke up feeling like that, too... I remember it had something to do with Bluestreak... Grr, I can't think of what it was!" There was a pause.
"Blue, huh? That sounds right... Ah think it had something to do wit his... doorwings?"
"That's it! Purring! Praxians purr when their doorwings are pet!" the frontliner chuckled before continuing here. "I still think that's hilarious..." Soundwave was intrigued vaguely by this new discovery as he listened to the two Autobots laughing. He looked at his lord and was mildly alarmed at the sadistic gleam in the gun-former's optics. He felt Lazerbeak hesitate before the cassette played the next bit of the conversation.
"What do ya think was wit da freak out when Prowler was brought up?" Soundwave felt his curiosity perk up at that. Was there something about the Autobot second that he didn't know? It was unlikely since Soundwave was one of the best information gatherers in existence, but there was a minor possibility.
"I have no idea..." The clip ended there, and Soundwave turned his full attention to his lord to see the reaction. The sadistic gleam was still there, but there was a darker emotion lurking within the depths of his optics that Soundwave tried a bit too hard to ignore.
"Hmm... Interesting. Yes, I do believe this is information worthy of leaving your post. Excellent job, Lazerbeak," Megatron purred, "Yes, this is quite the discovery..." he chuckled to himself before addressing his Communications Officer, "Soundwave!"
"Lord Megatron?" Soundwave was careful to express nothing as he allowed Lazerbeak to fold up and return into his chassis.
"Bring the Seekers here. I need them to confirm this information. And make sure all of my lead trine are here"
"Yes, Lord Megatron."
Gathering up the Command Trine was a quick task for a determined Soundwave. It may have helped that Thundercracker had only just been cleared of the med bay and he'd found the calmer Seeker first, and that he only had to show a single 5 second clip of Starscream dancing to the human song "It's Raining Tacos" for the usually volatile trine leader to gather up the rest of the lead Seekers without complaint, but Soundwave really didn't care either way.
Five breems later, the Command Trine and the Cone-heads stood before a wickedly grinning Megatron, and not even the snarky Starscream felt comfortable enough to make a comment when the Decepticon leader looked like that. Soundwave stood behind his lord in the shadows, quietly monitoring the fleeting surface thoughts of the mecha in the room. The tension began to rise as Megatron said nothing, his dark red optics glinting smugly as he watched the Seekers in front of him.
"Starscream, I'm want you to confirm something for me. Is it true Praxians purr when their doorwings are stroked?" Megatron rumbled after a few breems, breaking the tension suddenly enough that Skywarp twitched noticeably.
Starscream looked at the large grey mech warily, his thoughts blurring into a hundred different scenarios as he tried to figure out what the heck this information had to do with anything.
"...Yes, Lord Megatron, it's true," the Seeker answered a moment later.
"And what effect does this have on them?"
Starscream continued to watch his leader with wary optics, something Soundwave noticed was repeated in every other Seeker's gaze.
"Praxians, as Seeker-kin, have sensitive doorwings, much like Seeker wings. As is similar to the reaction of a Seeker, Praxians have a positive response to the stroking of the wings and purr. This response is involuntary and often disabling as the processor focusses on the pleasurable stimuli rather than whatever else is going on around them. Is that what you wished to know, Lord Megatron?"
Megatron grinned, and Soundwave caught the brief flicker of terror that passed through every Seeker's mind at the sight.
"Yes, that is perfect."
Starscream seemed to hesitate before pressing on with what Soundwave knew to be forced courage, "So, oh mighty leader, do you plan on sharing your oh so intelligent thoughts with the rest of your forces, or shall we attempt to guess?" The Seeker sneered.
Megatron chuckled, "Very well. I plan to do something I've wanted for a very long time. I plan to win this war."
Starscream's optics widened a bit at that, but pressed on.
"Oh, yes, and how do you plan that, oh powerful Lord Megatron? It's not like you haven't tried for the past millennia or anything..." Megatron's optics narrowed at that, but continued to smirk.
"I plan to take away their core. That's what I need you Seekers for, particularly you Skywarp."
Skywarp flinched in surprise. "Me, my Lord?"
"Yes. You are going to be instrumental in this plan..."
"And what is the plan, my Lord?" Starscream asked, true annoyance clear in his tone.
Megatron laughed. "Why, Starscream, where's that genius you're always bragging about? I plan to capture the Second in Command of the Autobots, of course. I plan to capture Prowl."
Soundwave felt the terror that had slowly bled out of the Seekers, Starscream in particular, slam back full force. The Seekers didn't dare speak, but Soundwave could tell they would rather deactivate than follow through with this plan...
Soundwave had a bad feeling about this...
_Mildly Terrified LINE BREAK_
A/N: So, how was chappie 2? I know it was a bit shorter than the first one, but we're so close to the ending! So, what do you guys thinks gonna happen? I mean, I think it may be a bit obvious, but still I wanna hear your theories, so Review! Spot any mistakes? Review! I enjoy making my writing better! But please, no flamers~! Remember, this is a Crack fic, so OOCness is expected~! Plus, despite how yummy smores are, they are really unhealthy... I think I'll set the review goal for 10 reviews for chappie 2~! That should give me time to edit chappie 3 and give me plenty of motivation while hearing from you pretties! Ja ne! ~R. Owl