Eeek, I've proof read twice but I'm sure there's still some mistakes. Thing is I'm kinda bogged down with reports right now and wanted to get this chapter finished and posted before I lost another week to work. Hopefully you'll forgive the errors and I'll clean them up when I get a chance.

Enjoy.

Shadows of the night

The wind was stronger tonight, the air holding a colder bite to its intensity as Cloud moved through the darkness and ran with the shadows. He still didn't know why he was doing it, still couldn't explain the desire to escape as it had consumed him, and in truth there was no need for him fleeing like this. But something had called to him from the world outside as the moon had shone through their bedroom window, a familiar presence whispering words that drew him away from the warmth and comfort of Zack's arms and out into the embrace of something else. And though the cadet had known there was no need to go he had been unable to stop himself from rising from their bed, had allowed his body to move of its own accord as he dressed quietly and slipped silently from the apartment.

There had been no time for second thoughts or regrets as the craving to run free had spread along every fibre of his being, as the sensation to move through the night had consumed him and left the blonde with no choice to obey. It wasn't like he was trying to get away from the soldier that lay sleeping peaceful back in their home, his heart aching both from the strain this activity was putting on it but also from the pain his distance now put between them. And yet, his feet would not stop moving, would not cease to travel across the dry muddied ground so that more and more space formed between them.

Cloud heard himself laughing as he moved like the wind and flew through the shadows of the night, no one able to see him let alone stop him as he became one with the very thing he was supposed to be fighting. Realisation of this dawned on the cadet just as if he had been struck by lightening, the very fabric of his soul being ripped in two by the heavenly sent bolt of electricity to shock some sense into him. Tired and aching Cloud slid to a stop and felt everything within him which had been growing strong fall away, felt his walls crumble and disintegrate until it was him alone in a barren wasteland and there was nothing there to protect him.

"Oh Gaia, what have I done?" The blonde breathed heart-brokenly, knowing that he wasn't supposed to run; knowing that he'd made this mistake before and promised never to make it again.

Panic filled the cadet's body until it overflowed and found release as crystal like tears, the evidence of his regret and shame spilling from his fear-filled ocean blue eyes and pouring down his pale cheeks in rivers of silver that shone brightly in the moonlight. Inside a part of him was screaming to turn around and run back, to hurry home and fall into bed once more with his soldier so that no one would know of his betrayal. But that dark part of his mind which had led him astray before would not keep quiet and called out loudly that it was already too late. The wicked voice whispering words that cut deep as it told him that Zack would be awake by now, that the soldier would be wondering why the cadet's side of the bed was cold and empty, and that his love would have already guessed that Cloud had abandoned him again.

"No." The blonde croaked, practically choking on a sob as it followed the only word he could speak. "No." He repeated again almost defiantly, the pain he felt at the idea of losing Zack giving him strength to fight.

Anger burnt through him like wildfire and Cloud used it to fuel his movements, focused all the rage which was now aimed at himself for leaving the safety and comfort of the soldier's arms and began to run back to the tender embrace that he needed so much. Except, something was wrong.

Dry mud was now becoming wet and sticky so that it clung to his boots and slowed him down, the skies having suddenly clouded over and started to rain down tears from the heavens to match his own as they continued to fall down over heart-broken angelic features. Each step he took becoming harder and more difficult to take, his speed gradually falling to nothing as the very world itself seemed to turn against him.

"No." Cloud choked out as he found himself unable to move any further forward, his feet now submerged to the ankle in a black tar like substance as the ground began to draw him in.

Panicking cobalt spheres flew up to the horizon, the fathomless blue depths searching desperately for hope and salvation. But Midgar was miles away in the distance, the plate and surrounding city nothing more than a dark outline against the backdrop of a lightning filled sky. And that, well that was more wrong than Cloud could imagine. After all, he hadn't run that far. Or had he?

Fear gripped Cloud harder than any other emotion possibly could, his terror filled eyes widening as he realised just how badly he had screwed up and that no one was here to help him and that, once again, he was very much alone. Dread raced through his veins as he felt himself begin to sink even further into the wet mud, the dark brown sludge pulling him under bit by bit so that there would be no escape. There was no way to get out of this, no way to get back to Zack and say he was sorry, no way to undo all the wrongs which still needed to be put right.

Cloud screamed for as long and as loud as his body would let him, the air he needed to breathe barely making it into his burning lungs as he continued to cry out for the mistakes he'd made and would never be able to make up for. He wanted his life with Zack back, wanted to be held and loved and cherished. He needed to be with his boyfriend and not here where the world was cold and cruel and trying to kill him. He struggled and fought as the ground continued to swallow him up, as the darkness swirled around his despairing form consuming him both mentally and physically as it buried him alive beneath a storm filled sky. He shouldn't have run even though the night had called to him, shouldn't have listened when the darkness spoke to him just as Reno had warned him. But it was too late to take that back now, too late to undo the damage which had been done.

Darkness and despair had a grip on Cloud that could not be undone, their icy claws digging into his flesh and spreading a cold through his bones which froze his blood. He couldn't move, couldn't get anyway, and the very earth he had walked on only moments ago was now trying to bury him alive. With nothing but fear and panic coursing through him the blonde continued to scream for help, even as the darkness pulled him under and into its embrace where no one would ever be able to find him again.

…

…

"Gaia damn it Cloud, wake up!" Reno shouted, his voice cracking as the blonde's never-ending terror filled cries made his own shaken emotions start to spiral out of control.

It was just after two in the morning, a time when any sane person was asleep, unless they had a job to do, and he'd been dead to the world in the room next door until the cadet's alarmed shouts had woken him. He'd faltered for a moment as his consciousness had drifted fuzzily someone just beyond the realms of sleep, his rational mind taking a painstakingly long few seconds before realising what he was hearing and the Turk had leapt from his bed and made a mad dash to the place in his apartment which Cloud was currently occupying.

His trembling hands had thrown the guest bedroom door open wide to reveal the outline of a knotted bundle of sheets wrapped tightly around a twisting and flailing form, the restraining mass of fabric keeping the poor cadet immobilised even as he struggled to break free and probably making the nightmare he was clearly experiencing even worse.

Not hesitating any longer Reno had thrown himself towards the bed and quickly begun digging at the edges of the blankets he could reach to start pulling Cloud free, had broken two nails in the processes of pulling one corner away only to be met by more twisted layers beneath. His heart having begun to race widely within his chest as the young blonde's sounds of distress had become more frightened and pain-filled with each passing second. With a desperate tug he wrenched the lose corner out further and managed to free the cadet's left arm, the limb instantly swinging out and latching onto his shoulder for dear life.

Biting back the cry of pain that wanted to escape him at Cloud's strong hold on his shoulder Reno struggled to get the cadet's other arm free, his right shoulder protesting the death like grip that was now being exerted on it as the cadet held on to him as if he were a life line to the blonde even in his sleep. A few more violet pulls and the remaining tangled sheets gave way and Cloud's upper body was unbound, the lose bedding quickly slipping all the way down the cadet's body so that it allowed his legs to break free as well. Yet, even with his self-created confinement gone the blonde didn't calm down, his lithe body continuing to twist and turn in clearly panicked, desperate attempts to get away from something as his mind remained trapped in the nightmare consuming him.

"Shit." The Turk swore in a heart-felt way, his own body now starting to hyperventilate a little as he frantically tried to work out what to do. "Come on Kid, you gotta wake up." He half pleaded, half ordered, as the frightened screams began make his ears ring and his head hurt.

But Cloud was unable to hear him and it was perhaps a blessing, or a curse, that when his sounds of torment did start to die down it was because he'd ripped the lining of his throat raw in the process. The heart-broken whimpers and pitiful words of protest which continued to escape him making the distressed noises from before even more painful to bear. With no other choice, and apparently no way of waking the cadet with his voice, Reno resorted to something he'd personally sworn he'd never do to another person. Unless absolutely necessary.

"I'm sorry." He breathed regretfully, before using one hand to grab the front of Cloud's nightshirt and hoist the blonde into a semi-sitting position then the other to slap the cadet across the face.

The smack of flesh upon flesh was distinctive as it echoed for a moment in the air around them, the sound being one Reno knew he wouldn't be able to forget for a while. And then his sea-green eyes saw the evidence of what he'd done on Cloud's tear stained check, the already damp pink surface now blossoming into a bright red handprint shape on one side. The dark crimson outline standing out in stark contrast to his otherwise pale features and looking even more painful than he'd meant t to be. Yet, it wasn't this sight which turned the red head's stomach as he continued to watch the blonde, his insides twisting as ocean blue orbs finally fluttered open and their pained depths became clear for him to see into properly.

Silence hung between them for what felt like a lifetime, but was in fact only a minute, as Cloud slowly took in the world around him. His dazed, confused and terror filled expression melting way to one of guilt, uncertainty and unquestionable relief.

"Cloud?" Reno asked carefully, not knowing what was now going on inside the cadet's head and hoping that just hearing his name would encourage the blonde to answer with some hint of what he was currently thinking.

"Reno?" Cloud managed breathlessly, his voice so faint and small that it made the Turk's chest feel tight.

"Yea kid, it's me." He whispered back just as softly, his voice remaining low and gentle as he spoke. "I'm right here."

"Where … are we?" The cadet managed, though it was clear the question pained him as much as he wanted to ask it.

"We're at my place." The red head replied carefully, unsure of how his answer would be taken. "You're crashing with me till Zack gets back. Remember?"

"Then I … I didn't … I …"

But whatever Cloud wanted to say he couldn't find the words, or at least he was afraid to let them be heard, and his voice fell away to almost inaudible choked breaths and barley muted whimpers as he wrapped his arms around the Turk's athletic body and buried his head against Reno's chest. The evidence of the cadet's unspoken fears easily being felt by the red head as the t-shirt he'd worn to bed soaked up the tears which once again began to fall freely from the silently sobbing blonde in his arms.

Time passed by slowly but neither of them moved to interrupt the quiet which had settled around them, as one gave the comfort which was clearly needed and the other took what was given without hesitation or restraint. The very open show of trust which Cloud was now displaying, in letting Reno hold and protect him like this, in this moment of vulnerability and weakness, not being missed by the red head for its true value.

Eventually though the hushed muffled crying seemed to stop and the shaking of the blonde's body had reduced to that of a slight tremble, which continued to work its way through his lithe frame. Not knowing if it was the right thing to do, but trusting his instincts that it was, Reno slowly put some distance between them by gently easing Cloud out of the embrace that had formed between them so that they could speak to each other more easily.

"I'm not going to push you about this." The red head began, knowing full well that if he did he could undo all the progress which this one moment between them had indirectly created. "But it might help if you talked about it."

Sadly Reno wasn't surprise when Cloud only tipped his head even further down and looked firmly at the space between them, a slightly movement of sweat dampened blonde hair showing that he was shaking his head in silent protest of the idea. What did catch him off guard though was when the cadet's body suddenly stilled and watery blue orbs glanced up at him uncertainly. The shimmering azure spheres flickering with something thoughtful, and clearly scared, before golden spikes drifted once more and this time the head bobbed slowly in agreement.

"O…K." Reno replied, not really knowing what else to say, his mind suddenly swimming with uncertainty as to how the conversation was supposed to go from this point forward.

"I…" Cloud began, before the red head could find his own words to fill the silent tension which now existed around them. "I was … running." He tried to explain, his poor voice sounding strained from his earlier screaming and notably thick from the tears which still seemed to linger ready to fall again at any minute.

"Running where?" The Turk enquired calmly, his own tone trying to remain as soothing as the gentle caresses he was administering to Cloud's body. His hand having begun to rub slow comforting circles along the blonde's back in a way that he hoped would be helpful in getting the still shaken cadet to relax a little more as they talked.

"I ... I'm not sure." Cloud whispered uncertainly, though it appeared he was telling the truth based on the way he seemed to be confused by this point. "Somewhere just … just outside Midgar." He offered weakly, the mere act of remembering this part of his dream making him shudder and lean forward into Reno's arms once more.

"Was it somewhere you've been before?"

It was a sensible question considering Cloud hadn't really had a chance to visit the areas beyond ShinRa's base within Midgar since he'd become a cadet. The rigorous training those boys went through, plus Cloud's own determination to work hard, meaning that there would have been little to no time to go down to the slums let alone to the wilderness beyond the city walls.

"Maybe when I … I came here." The blonde suggested, his voice still sounding abused though he made no sign of letting it stop the words which were now passing between them. "I could see … I saw it … in the distance." He sighed, unable to explain any better than that.

"Were you running towards it or away from it?"

A part of Reno didn't want to ask this particular question, but something told him he needed to. The same something which seemed to take notice when the cadet in his arms tensed all over again and a muffled whimper was heard against his chest.

"Both." Cloud rasped, clearly upset by this fact.

"I know you're gonna hate me for his." Reno began, knowing that never were truer words spoken. "But I really need you to tell me what that nightmare was about."

"I ran from Zack."

Reno didn't let the curses which suddenly filled his mind have a voice, didn't dare give them the freedom to be spoken, as he bit his cheek and waited for the rest of Cloud's explanation to be heard.

"I don't even know why." The cadet practically wailed in despair, his strained voice making the choked up words sound even more pained by the confession. "I just … wanted to run, to be … free, but then …" He managed to force out between small stuttered breaths, the uncertain tone he spoke with revealing that Cloud was just as confused by it all as Reno himself was becoming.

"But then?" The Turk coaxed gently, his comforting touches never faltering as he continued to hold the blonde close.

"I knew it … it was wrong, to run from him, and I … I turned back. But I … but it …"

The red head waited quietly this time, patiently giving Cloud a few seconds to pull himself together. He knew that this time the cadet hadn't paused out of fear of his own words but because his throat had closed up on him, understood that the emotions still flowing through the blonde were making his words even more uncomfortable and choked up as he tried to speak.

"When I … tried to get back … I … I couldn't." Cloud finally stuttered, his heart-ache at such a thing evident in his tight voice.

"Can I ask why?"

Reno cursed himself even as he asked, knowing that he was now pushing his luck as he felt Cloud start to tense all over again.

"It was … Midgar was … too far. I … I'd run too far." The cadet stammered, his unprompted willingness to explain helping to ease a little of the guilt now weighing down on the Turk at pushing for answers when he'd said he wouldn't. "And then the … the ground. It … I got stuck … it wouldn't let me go."

Ok, that part wasn't good the red head thought as his brow furrowed in concern. Cloud's words continuing to come out broken and pained as he tried to give the information Reno had asked for, as he tried to meet the terms of their agreement and share his problems with the Turk instead of bottling them up and running away from it all.

"The ground was …wet … and muddy. But it was more than that." The cadet tried to justify, the tremble which had never really left him now picking up again. "It pulled me under, wouldn't let me go, and didn't want me to get back."

Reno didn't know what to say, what words of comfort to give now, especially when that part of Cloud's dream was freaking him out and he hadn't even been the one to experience it. The idea of being pulled down by something you couldn't fight, to be buried alive beneath the earth and feel it consuming you with no way of escape. It was every person's worst nightmare, to be buried alive, and now he understood why the blonde had been screaming so loudly and with such fear and panic.

"I think that would freak me out too." He finally offered, needing to break the uncomfortable silence which had stretched out between them. "I mean, who wouldn't be terrified by that?"

"Do you believe that … that dreams mean something?" Cloud managed, his voice barley a whisper, his hesitantly asked question cracking in the middle and showing his uncertainty in giving it a voice.

"I think that sometimes they're just our minds trying to sort through a load of stuff and short circuiting a bit." The red head proposed carefully, unsure now whether his answer would be helpful of not. "Sometimes they're the things we want and hope for, the things we strive to achieve and look forward to in our futures." He suggested as tactfully as possible, his words continuing when no audible protests were made. "And sometimes I think that they're the guilt we feel for the things we've done, our brains unable to keep it all safely tucked away and some of it slipping free to mix with our dreams so that we end up dealing with it subconsciously."

"So me running and not being able to come back." Cloud hesitated to say, the unspoken question coming through loud and clear for the Turk to hear.

"I'd say your guilt at that got a little mixed up with your fear of hurting Zack again." Reno confirmed, the straightening of the cadet's body in his arms signalling that Cloud was about to pull away.

"And me being … pulled under … like that?" The blonde began as he put some distance between them just as the red head had predicted he would.

"I'm not sure." Reno admitted with a slight shrug, his athletic frame moving back to give Cloud the room he was clearly in need of now as they talked. "Maybe it's your fear of not being able to come back if you do it again, or that whatever makes you run away the next time won't let you come back."

"You mean … I … that I'll be …"

"It was just a dream, alright?" Reno quickly cut in, not really liking where Cloud's train of thought was now going. "A mixture of things that have been, and that you feel, coming together in one really fucked up nightmare."

He watched as the blonde nodded in silent agreement, those Gaia dammed expressive sapphire eyes filled with fare to much contemplation for someone who was supposed to be letting it go.

"Cloud?" The red head whispered softly, his hand reaching up to rest gently on the blonde's shoulder and squeeze it reassuringly. His next words waiting until a pair of glistening ocean blue eyes finally looked up and met his concerned sea-green ones. "I know this has freaked you out, but you need to remember that it was just a dream. A really shitty dream mind you, but still just a dream."

"I know." The cadet whispered hoarsely, his ruined throat once again making itself known to them both. "But it felt so real."

"Tell you what." Reno began, already rising to his feet and beginning to pull the cadet free from his remaining covers as he did so. "Your voice sounds like you've been swallowing glass and I could use a drink, so how about we grab a cup of hot chocolate and try to find something to watch while we chill out a bit?" He proposed calmly, as he practically dragged the cadet into the living room and deposited him on the nearest sofa to the kitchen area.

"But it's late and … and your probably tired and I … I've woken you up and … and all this and ... and I'm sorry… I'm so sorry." Cloud stammered to apologise, as he realised just what time it was by looking at the clock which hung on the wall beside them and a fresh wave of guilt flowed through him.

"Hush." The red head replied with friendly chastisement as he set to work preparing their drinks. "I want hot chocolate and this is as good of an excuse as any." He stated firmly, though both knew he was just saying it to be kind.

Cloud didn't objection the words though, couldn't argue them even if he'd wanted to, and it had nothing to do with the fact his throat was hurting so much. What silenced the blonde's possible protests was the mix of emotions he saw within aqua coloured orbs, the need for Reno to do this to help calm them both coming through loud and clear.

Silently the blonde nodded in agreement and without another word waited for the warm drinks to be made, his quiet acceptance of the situation not alleviating Reno's concerns completely, but at least giving him a chance to try and rectify the problem in some small way. They didn't talk about the dream any more after that, for which both were silently grateful. Cloud more so because it meant he could push it aside and try to ignore how it made him feel, whereas Reno was simply relieved that he didn't have to try and explain something he didn't really understand in the first place. And in the end they drifted off to sleep in their respective chairs within the living room, neither having found the energy to return to their beds once the hot chocolate had worked its magic nor willing to be out of sight of the other just in case the nightmare returned.

When the sun finally rose later that morning the blonde and red head continued to sleep on, each so lost to a deep sleep that they didn't hear the alarms going off in their respective rooms signalling the start of the day. And so it was Cissnei who found them still curled up asleep in their nightwear when she'd been sent to find them by Tseng, her smile being soft and silently understanding as she waited for them to get dressed and ready for the planned morning ahead. The look she gave Reno letting him know that while she had questions, that would be answered no matter what, she would not ask him in front of Cloud. And for that the red head was more than grateful.