Batman: Fury Road
Chapter 5: HELGA AND HER FIVE WIVES
MORNING. THERE IS SILENCE IN THE WASTELAND. THE SANDSTORM IS OVER. BRUCE SLOWLY RISES OUT OF THE SAND. HE NOTICES ZUK IS UNCONSCIOUS. BRUCE GRABS HIS ELC CHARGER AND CHECKS ITS BATTERY CARTRIDGE. IT IS HALF-EMPTY. BRUCE GRUNTS IN ANNOYANCE AS HE HOISTS ZUK ON HIS SHOULDER AND WANDERS OFF, FOLLOWING THE TRAIL OF GUZZOLINE THE WAR RIG LEFT BEHIND
ELSA: HELGA?
HELGA: WHAT?
ELSA: ARE WE THERE YET?
HELGA: PRAY TO VALHALLA, CHILD, IF YOU ASK ME THAT ONE MORE TIME…
DORA: OOH! A PIT STOP!
THE WAR RIG STOPS. HELGA AND THE FIVE WIVES GET OUT. HELGA NOTICES AURORA IS ASLEEP.
HELGA: AURORA! GET UP!
AURORA YAWNS AND SLOWLY WANDERS OFF LIKE A ZOMBIE UNTIL SHE RUNS INTO BRUCE, KNOCKING HIM DOWN.
BRUCE GRUNTS AS HE GETS UP AND COMES INTO CONTACT WITH AURORA
BRUCE: HMM…
AURORA: WAIT A SEC. YOU'RE THAT GUY WHO WAS ON THAT CAR THAT OTHER GUY WAS DRIVING
HELGA: AURORA! YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE WATCHING FOR THE WAR PARTY, NOT PLAYING LOOKIE-LOO WITH SOME ROAD KNIGHT!
ZUK'S EYES OPEN AND HE LUNGES AT HELGA, BABBLING IN TONGUES. BRUCE GIVES A MIGHTY YANK WITH THE CHAIN, A CARTOONY YOINK SOUND IS HEARD, AND ZUK IS HURTLING BACK ON THE GROUND
ZUK: LOOK AT THEM, SHINY AND CHROME. WE COULD ASK FOR ANYTHING. I WANNA DRIVE THE WAR RIG
BRUCE TAKES THE UTILITY BELT OFF OF ZUK
BRUCE: THAT'S MY BELT
ZUK: YEAH, YEAH, YOU CAN ASK FOR MORE THAN A BELT!
ELSA: WE'RE GOING TO THE GREEN PLACE
BRUCE AND ZUK IMMEDIATELY FREEZE AT THAT MOMENT
ZUK: WHAT?
HELGA: YOU, HOOD ORNAMENT, GET IN. I'LL GET THAT FACE THING OFF YOUR FACE
BRUCE: K
ZUK: HEY! WHAT ABOUT ME?!
HELGA AND THE WIVES STARE AT ZUK FOR A FEW MOMENTS
ELSA: HEY, WAR TOON, ISNT THAT VALHALLA OVER THERE?
ZUK: OMG, WHERE?!
ELSA: STRAIGHT BACK WHERE YOU CAME FROM
ZUK RACES DOWN THE PATH, SCREAMING AND LAUGHING INSANELY
BRUCE: … AND I THOUGHT BARTERTOWN WAS NUTTY ENOUGH
ELSA: BARTERWHATNOW?
BRUCE: LONG STORY. WILL TELL YOU WHEN YOU'RE OLDER
CUT TO ZUK RUNNING TO IMMORTOON ZIM'S WAR PARTY BEFORE HE REALIZES HE'S BEEN DUPED. ZUK IMMEDIATELY CLIMBS INTO THE MILK TANKER AS THE WAR RIG DRIVES OFF JUST AS THE WAR PARTY ARRIVES
HELGA: CAPABLE, WHAT IS IT YOU SEE?
WHILE BRUCE IS UNHOOKING HIS MUZZLE WITH HIS BAT-KNIFE, CAPABLE PULLS OUT A TELESCOPE AND PEERS OUT THE WINDOW
CAPABLE: POLECATS… SCAVS… PSYCHOS… MARAUDERS… AND THE PEOPLE EATER HISSELF
CLOSE UP ON BLOB DRIVING TANKER. THIS IS THE PEOPLE EATER, MAYOR OF GAS TOWN
HELGA: HEY, ROAD KNIGHT?
BRUCE: HRRM?
HELGA: WHAT'S YOUR NAME?
BRUCE: DID YOU READ CHAPTER 1?
HELGA: ….
BRUCE: CALL ME BAT
HELGA: UM… OK
BRUCE: YOU'LL FIND MY REAL NAME EVENTUALLY
JUST THEN ZUK LEAPS UP AND STRANGLES HELGA WITH A CHAIN, SPEAKING IN TONGUES. CAPABLE, ELSA AND AURORA RESTRAIN HIM
ZUK: IT WASN'T MY FAULT! WE WERENT TO BLAME
ELSA: THEN WHO KILLED THE WORLD?!
ZUK IS SILENT AS HE REALIZES IMMORTOON ZIM IS RESPONSIBLE.
CAPABLE: WE WILL COME BACK FOR YOU
CAPABLE GIVES ZUK A GENTLE PUSH OUT OF THE WAR RIG, BUT NOT BEFORE GIVING HIM HER SCARF AS A KEEPSAKE
ZUK: IMMORTOON! IMMORTOON ZIM!
ZIM HEARS ZUK'S SHOUTING AND RAISES HIS HAND TO COMMAND THE VEHICLES TO STOP AS ZUK APPROACHES THE GIGAHORSE. ON A PURSUIT BIKE IS SPICE
ZIM: WHAT IS IT?
ZUK: I'VE FOUND THEM. THE WIVES ARE IN THE WAR RIG. HEADING TO THE GREEN PLACE
ZIM: CLIMB ABOARD
ZUK: AM I AWAITED?
ZIM GRUNTS
ZIM: WE SHALL SEE
GASTUS: BUT DAD, WHAT ABOUT THE ROAD KNIGHT?
ZIM: PATIENCE, GASTUS. ONCE HELGA IS DEAD AND THE FIVE WIVES ARE MINE AGAIN, THEN I'LL DECIDE HIS FATE
SPICE: HEY! HEY! I GOT HIS BOOT!
SPICE IS SCREAMING THIS AS THE GIGAHORSE DRIVES OFF. OBSERVING THIS IS THE PEOPLE EATER AND HANDSOME JACK, THE BULLET FARMER
BULLET FARMER: ALL THIS OVER A PETTY FAMILY SQUABBLE. HEALTHY TOONS
BULLET FARMER SMIRKS. PEOPLE EATER NODS HIS HEAD
CUT TO ROCK RIDER CHASE. ROCK RIDERS ARE PURSUING THE WAR RIG, THROWING GRENADES. JUST THEN, THE GIGAHORSE GETS CLOSE. ELSA OPENS THE DOOR AND STANDS OUT, DEFENDING CAPABLE AND AURORA AS A MEATSHIELD. ZIM IS SHOCKED
ZIM: ELSA! ELSA, DON'T! THAT'S MY CHILD! THAT'S MY PROPERTY!
ELSA: WE ARE NOT THINGS. WE ARE NOT THINGS!
ELSA SLAMS THE DOOR WITH THAT, ZIM HOLSTERS HIS PISTOL IN FRUSTRATION. ZUK COMES UP
ZUK: IMMORTOON? I KNOW A WAY IN
ZIM LOOKS AT THE OVERLY PSYCHOTIC WAR TOON
ZIM: WHAT IS YOUR NAME?
ZUK: ITS ZUK
ZIM HANDS ZUK HIS REVOLVER
ZIM: GO. PUT A BULLET IN HER SKULL, STOP THE RIG, RETURN MY TREASURES TO ME, AND I MYSELF WILL PERSONALLY CARRY YOU… TO THE GATES OF VALHALLA
ZUK'S FACE BEAMS WITH JOY
ZUK: AM I AWAITED?
ZIM SPRAYS ZUK'S FACE WITH CHROME
ZIM: YOU WILL RIDE ETERNAL, SHINY AND CHROME. GASTUS! HELP HIM ABOARD!
ZUK CLIMBS OVER TO WHERE GASTUS IS STANDING. GASTUS HOOKS A PULLEY TO THE BACK OF ZUK'S PANTS
GASTUS: ALL RIGHT? HERE WE GO
GASTUS TOSSES ZUK ONTO THE TOP OF THE RIG WITH A MIGHTY THROW. AS ZUK SCRAMBLES FORWARD, THE CHAIN SNAGS ON THE RAILING, ZUK SLIPS AND LOSES THE REVOLVER
ZIM: BAH! MEDIOCRE!
ZIM DRIVES OFF IN DISGUST, ZUK SEES GASTUS SHOUT "GOOD JOB" AS AN ACT OF APPRECIATION. HUMILIATED AND DEVESTATED, ZUK CLIMBS INTO THE RIG AND LAYS THERE
TO BE CONTINUED IN CHAPTER 6