Frodo and Sam were out of Bilbo's garage now. #dangeroustho
"Frodo, I'm already scared. We're five steps out of the Hobbiton territory!" Frodo face-palmed.
"Sam, you douche. This isn't very far. Didn't you take pre-calculus, you dumba**!" Sam was displeased.
"Frodo, ur so mean! Ya wimp!" Sam was very p***ed off. "Ayyyy, you wanna be bffs, Frodo?"
"No."
There was silence for a while. Then, Merry the short plump man came out some garbage cans. So did Pippin, another short plump man, but more stupid.
"Hey girl!" Pippin said with a touch of saltiness.
"OMG it's Frodo! And his chubby companion, Sam! OMG we're getting food out of these garbage cans. OMG the garbage person is coming, run away!" Merry cried out.
Frodo and Sam ran with Merry and Pippin. The garbage person was shouting after them mercilessly.
"Let's hide in this totally abandoned house!" Pippin said, pointing to an old meat parlor.
"F*** that!" Frodo yelled. "That stuff's nasty! I'm a vegan!"
"Here's a sausage, you p***y," Merry and Pippin said in unison. They threw a sausage at Frodo. Frodo was disgusted.
Suddenly, a dark hooded figure came from out of the darkness.
"OMG what is that? Nice style!" Merry said. The figure was coming very close. "OMG let's run away! He's scary actually!"
Frodo, Sam, Merry and Pippin ran into the meat parlor anyway, and were greeted by another dark figure. It hissed at them.
"Where is Sauron's ring-pop?" It asked in a scary voice.
"It's at Walmart, aisle 9."
"No, you have it, douchebag. I can smell that sweet scent of strawberry berry berry berry."
Then the figure screamed a lot. Then the short men screamed a lot. Then they ran for it.