Hours of tests after Shepard left him to the science team assigned to his resurrection and well being, Nihlus emerged a little stronger, sorer, and feeling a bit violated. The rehabilitation lab doctors released him to Shepard's charge with a smile and a regiment of exercises to regain his strength. He found her waiting for him just outside the doors with Miranda, who had also wore the signs of stresses of Armageddon and time. No doubt she oversaw my... recovery.
"It's good to have you back, Kryik." Miranda said.
"Thank you for making it possible." He offered her a half bow.
"You're welcome." Miranda nodded, confirming his conjecture. "I'll just leave you two alone." She said, glancing over to Shepard then back to the turian without smiling, before leaving the room.
"Sorry about the tests. We wanted to make sure you're not going to fall apart. How are you feeling?" Shepard offered a smile.
He hoped she was teasing, but she wasn't smirking. "Sore, tired... even though I've been asleep for five years." He teased.
"Good to see your since of humor recovered." Shepard replied with a slight grin. "You seem to be taking this all pretty well."
"I'm alive and with my bond mate." He responded. "We can handle the rest. There's no time to lament what cannot be changed. A morose spirit makes easier prey for the Reapers."
"I suppose you're right," she shrugged.
He took her hand in his as they walked down the hall. She curled her fingers over his palm, but did not return the smile. It only seemed to sadden her. They passed into the living section of the station. He could feel the slight vertigo from artificial gravity. He knew they were hers quarters when the scent in the air filled his nostrils. No one smelled quite as she did.
She retired to the shower room that made up one corner of the space almost as soon as the door closed behind them. He was cleaner than he'd ever been after the doctors were done with him, so he climbed under the sheets of the bed. When Sonya reappeared in a tank and boxers, she hesitated when she saw him laying there. For a few moments she busied herself with medial tasks, such as setting out a clean uniform for the next day and tidying up unnecessarily. He had to remind himself that it had been five years for her since anyone else was in her bed. Then the thought occurred to him that perhaps it hadn't. His belly flipped and he suddenly felt anxious and jealous. He took slow, even breaths to control himself. He reminded himself he had no right to be upset after what she forgave him for, but the idea still hurt. Eventually she turned off the main light, leaving only the low glow of a lamp on the bed side table. She crawled in next to him, leaving several inches of space. It made him uncomfortable that she did not want to be near him, but he tried to be understanding.
"I love you." He purred, tentatively caressing her face.
She smiled faintly at him. Her eyes seemed to search him for something he couldn't get a feel for.
"I love you too, but..."
She put a hand over his and adverted her eyes to the pillow. He withdrew his hand. Worry and fear tickled at his mind with paranoia. He tried to push the thoughts away, but the 'but...' at the end of her sentence that trailed off to silence was a needle in his heart and in his mind. Then he took her hand in his. He could not be angry with her if she had sought comfort from time to time with another. Her time of loneliness was much greater than the stresses he endured.
"If you... If you're worried I'll be upset... I won't hold anything against you. It wouldn't be fair. I realize five yeas... it's a long time." He told her. He meant it, but he could feel the storm brewing.
She looked at him with all sincerity and love he remembered from a time that was only hours ago for him. He moved in closer to nuzzle her forehead out of habit, but she turned away. A stiff reminder that it would take time. That she was willing to sleep next to him was probably a blessing. It stung but he tried to understand.
"What is wrong? I know I've been gone a while, but I would think you would be happier to see me... If you still love me..." He voiced his concern. He tried to guess what else might be bothering her. " I will always love you, Sonya. There is nothing you could have done to change that. You are my bond mate."
"Nihlus... you should rest." she said thickly.
She rolled over and put him to her back. In the dim light he saw the subtle scars on her body that were not from battle or from him. Are those... from another turian? Did she bond with someone else? I didn't smell him... The realization of the possibility angered him and he turned his back to her and glared at the wall trying to control himself. How could she? he thought bitterly. She was mine! She is mine!... But I was dead... I might not have come back. Can I really expect her to have remained alone and deny herself love and happiness if she found it? ... Where... who did she...
"Are you still bound to him?" He asked in a low tone that was almost a whisper.
His heart beat hard in his chest as he waited for her answer. Waiting to learn if he had been replaced. It felt like an eternity.
"I have not seen him since I left him in charge of the Normandy to come here. It's been months." She answered with a sigh.
He sat up and turned to her quickly then, his peridot eyes blazed in the dark.
"Who did you leave in charge of the Normandy, Shepard?" He asked, unable to hide the anger from his voice.
Sonya sat up to face him, fear and pain in her eyes. He knew the answer before she told him.
"Garrus Vakarian."