Monday, November 22:
Station 127
The fire had taken only about half an hour to extinguish. The cleanup, however, took several more hours and Station 127 cleared the scene shortly before one. The engines backed into the bay, one at a time. The firefighters exited the engines and headed for the showers. Captain Walker stopped one of them with his voice before they got too far.
"Gage! In my office." He indicated the location with a jerk of his thumb.
The captain did not bother with niceties before launching into his reprimand. "What the hell did you think you were doing?" he demanded rhetorically, neither pausing for breath nor expecting a reply. He continued to articulate his ire and re-instruct Johnny in the finer points of firefighting protocols and ventilation procedures.
Johnny had been studiously examining a spot just to the right of Captain Walker's nose during the dressing down. "Look at me, Gage." Johnny's eyes snapped to meet the captain's. "We all have made this kind of mistake and I know this is a tough time for you, so I won't be putting a reprimand in your file. Consider this a verbal warning that this kind of inattention simply will – not – be – tolerated!" His tone emphasized the last four words. "Understand, Gage?"
"Yes, sir. Thank you, sir."
Captain Walker crossed his arms and thoughtfully considered the younger man before him. Hazarding a guess as to what might really be bothering him, he said, "You couldn't have done anything to prevent it, you know."
"Yes, sir." Johnny's expression belied the words.
"Hit the showers, Gage. Dismissed."
After Johnny left the office, Captain Walker sat down to begin writing up the fire incident report. He drummed his pen on the desk, still thinking about the man who had just left. Captain Walker derived immense satisfaction from being a firefighter. He loved everything, from the first kick of adrenaline when riding to a call on the big rig, sirens screaming, to the smoky, bone-weary fatigue of a stubborn fire finally knocked down. He felt most alive when battling the dragon, safeguarding property and above all, protecting lives. He also enjoyed the nitty-gritty, hands-on of station life. The camaraderie between partners. The deeper-than-brother closeness that few other professions developed in men. He felt no desire to rise any higher into the paperwork chain of command than where he already was. He was a seasoned leader, confident in his abilities to captain men; however, he did not particularly care for the messy, personal psychology aspect of leadership. And he did not know exactly what to do about this particular firefighter.
Johnny stopped at the pay phone before heading to the showers.
"Rampart Emergency. This is Nurse McCall speaking."
"Uh, hi, Dixie. This is Johnny. Uh, has Roy been released yet?"
"Hi, Johnny!" Dixie was both pleased and surprised to hear from him. 'Down, girl.' "Oh, he left about an hour and a half ago, I think."
"Oh." The relief in Johnny's voice was evident in just the one word. "It wasn't too serious, then?"
"Just some facial abrasions and bruising to the shoulder. He has limited mobility, but should be as good as new in less than a week."
"That's good."
"So, how are you doing, Johnny?" Dixie had a well-deserved reputation for getting directly to the heart of the matter.
"Uh, fine. Fine."
'You're not a very good liar, John Gage.' "Johnny…" Dixie began, and then hesitated, not sure how far she should go. "You know, if you need to talk, I'll buy the coffee."
"Why, Dix! Is this a date?" Johnny made an attempt at humor.
"Whatever it takes to see my favorite par...-p-patient." She mentally cringed. 'Open mouth, insert both feet.'
"I wasn't planning to be a patient any time soon. But maybe I'll take you up on the coffee later." Nothing in his voice indicated that he'd noticed what she had narrowly avoided saying. If anything, he sounded a bit puzzled by her word choice.
"You do that, Johnny." She sincerely hoped he would take her up on the offer, but rather doubted that he would.
"Gotta go. Bye, Dix. And, thanks."
"Bye, Johnny." She sighed as she put the phone down. This whole situation just didn't sit right with her.
Toby Barnes smirked, deliberately jostling Johnny as they passed each other in the hallway which lead to the shower room.
Johnny kept walking, not even bothering to glance at the man.
"Hey! You too high and mighty to say 'excuse me' when you bump into somebody, skinny boy?"
Johnny turned around slowly and faced Barnes. "Man, what is your problem?"
"I ain't got no problem. You're the one goin' around, thinkin' you're better than everyone else 'cause you're a paramedic. 'Cept you ain't no more. Guess you're not as good as you think." Barnes expression was feral, seeing the remark hit the target.
"Where do you get all this stuff? I never said I was better than you. I don't even know you!" He was drawn into the futile argument.
"You don't have to say it, skinny boy. You just act like it."
"I do not …" He visibly checked himself, knowing from past experience that you just couldn't argue with a bully. "Okay, look. Whatever it is you think I did, I'm sorry." Johnny glanced around at the mini audience the scene had acquired. "Excuse me, I'm going to take a shower."
Toby Barnes and Mark Smith moved down the hall, talking.
"Lighten up, Barnes," scowled Mark. "If the Cap hears you, he's going to blow a gasket."
"Yeah, well let him blow. I'm going to ask for a transfer anyway. I mean, look at this place. I don't want to work with these people. They take jobs away from us. You can't trust 'em."
"What are you talking about?"
"Take a look around you! This station is filled with non-whites. They have no business being here. They should stay with their own kind, instead of coming here and taking a white man's job. It's getting so deservin' folk like me and you can't get promoted because all those bleedin' heart liberals want to hand these damned minorities everything on a silver platter!" Barnes' voice had started to rise with the last sentence as he jabbed Mark in the chest with his finger for emphasis. Then, calming a bit, he added, "Gotta go hang hose," and made his way down the hall.
Mark stared after his friend in shock. The two men had grown up together in the same small town. They had been best buddies throughout school. They hunted together; they drank together; they brawled together. It was Barnes who had wanted to pursue a career in firefighting, so they both became firefighters. Then Barnes had a hankering to see more of the world, so they applied for jobs in the L.A. area. Barnes had always been the leader, Smith the follower. But one thing Mark didn't share was Barnes' growing attitude of intolerance towards non-whites. The small town where they had grown up was predominantly white, thus limiting exposure to people different from themselves. Mark was pleasantly surprised to find that the more he worked with Roberts, Atuaia, and Esteves, the more his professional admiration for the men grew. Even his personal views were changing. He wasn't sure about Gage yet, but then he really didn't know the man. Mark knew he was going to have to make a difficult choice soon.
Johnny let the hot water run over his body, washing away the sweat and soot, easing the tension in his neck and shoulders. 'Not as good as you think.' Barnes' words crashed against each other inside his head. 'Not as good as you think.'
After showering, Johnny headed to the kitchen in search of an aspirin. Keith Roberts, who was making lunch, informed him that Captain Walker wanted him to hang hose. Keith hesitated, then added, "Watch yourself around Barnes. He's one mean mother."
"Is it just me, or does he hate everyone this much?" Johnny asked.
Keith shook his head. "Oh no, it's not just you. Barnes is an equal-opportunity sonofabitch."
"Oh, one of those. Great."
Johnny hurriedly downed two aspirin and then went out back to assist with hanging the hose. He was not thrilled to see Barnes there along with Manuel and Ioane.
They were discussing the upcoming Thanksgiving Day football games. Ioane was waxing positively poetic about the Cowboys' offensive line. Since Manuel was also a Cowboys fan, the conversation was quite animated on both sides.
Johnny was half-listening to them and half-paying attention to hanging hose. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Barnes lob a coil of hose in his direction. He caught it with a grunt, but lost his balance and stumbled into Ioane. "Sorry!" he gasped.
"No harm done, braddah," Ioane assured Johnny. He had decided that he liked, especially after the work he'd seen him do in the canyon last shift.
Barnes assumed a mock-disgusted air. "Can't you even hang hose without screwing up, skinny boy?"
"Why don't you watch how you pass the hose, eh?" Ioane glared at Barnes.
In the face of such formidable opposition, Barnes apparently decided to back off for the time being.
"Station 36; Station 95; Station 127. Working structure fire with injuries. 516 South Selwin Ave. 5-1-6 South Selwin Ave. Cross street East 214th. Time out 22:18."
In some ways the two fires the men had fought that day were similar. Both involved older, three-story apartment buildings. Both had been smoky and hot. In some ways the two fires were different in nature. One had been fought early in the morning; the second had been battled late at night. One fire had originated in the attic; the second had originated in the basement. One fire resulted in no injuries; the second fire had proven to be deadly.
Johnny carried the lifeless body of a small girl over to the triage area and gently placed her on the ground. He smoothed her hair and rested his hand on the side of her face for a moment. The death of a child had always affected him profoundly. It always would. Eyes burning, trying to swallow the lump in his throat, he wearily rose to return to the gruesome task of retrieving the bodies of victims.
Keith Roberts fell into step with Johnny as they returned to the ruined structure. Toby Barnes moved to block the way, eyes glittering with malice. "There's another one you couldn't save, skinny boy," he sneered quietly, indicating the child with a jerk of his head. His capacity for inflicting pain was seemingly boundless.
"What the hell is the matter with you!" Johnny bellowed, his voice an equal mixture of rage and anguish. He started to take a step towards the man, but something stopped him short. Although Keith had not been able to hear the words spoken by Barnes, he had grabbed onto Johnny's arm even before the words were out of Johnny's mouth.
"C'mon man. He's not worth it. He's not worth it." Keith's voice was insistent in Johnny's ear.
"You want a piece of me, Gage?" Barnes beckoned, voice taunting. Suddenly he dropped his hands and turned back towards the building. He had caught a glimpse of Captain Walker heading their way.
"C'mon man," Keith repeated. He could feel the adrenaline rush causing Johnny's body to tremble even through the thick turnout coat. "He's just not worth it. Let it go."
"I cannot believe him! We're carrying out babies and he doesn't even care! They're just babies!" Sorrow over the loss of such young, innocent lives made his voice catch.
"I know, man. Captain's coming." Keith warned, letting go of Johnny's arm.
"I don't know how he got to be a firefighter in the first place."
"Yeah, they're lettin' all kinds in these days," Keith drawled in a fair imitation of Barnes' voice.
The irony of hearing a phrase that had often been applied to people like him and Keith being directed towards someone like Barnes made Johnny smile. "Thanks, man."
"Any time."
Johnny nodded at Captain Walker as they headed back to the building. He wasn't sure how much of the scene had been witnessed.
The two engines backed into the station in the stillness of the predawn hour. Seven exhausted firefighters headed for the showers. Captain Walker stopped one of them with a hand to the shoulder. "Gage. In my office," he said quietly.
Johnny groaned inwardly, wearily following his to the office for the second time that day.
Captain Walker did not say anything for a moment as he thoughtfully the disheveled and exhausted man. He had seen the altercation between the two men, but not what had provoked it. "What's going on, Gage?"
"Uh, we had a difference of opinion. We'll work it out."
"See that you do, Gage. I don't want to see any more of that kind of display. Understand?"
"Yes, sir."
"Dismissed."
The captain stayed in his office for a few more moments, pondering the dynamics between the men in his station. He was not oblivious to the underlying tensions. He had observed Barnes' tasteless joking and thinly veiled insults, and had called him on it several times in the past. What it was about Gage's arrival at the station that exacerbated Barnes' belligerence, he did not know. Perhaps Barnes subconsciously sensed the vulnerability of the other man. Whatever it was, the situation appeared to be escalating. Lips tightening into a straight line, he set off in search of Toby Barnes. The captain hesitated at the door to the dormitory. Perhaps this conversation had best wait until after a few hours of sleep.
Shortly before the shift ended, Captain Walker called Toby Barnes into his office. After listening to Barnes' version of the story, which neatly exonerated him of any guilt, the captain discussed positive ways of dealing with people one did not like and how to best manage anger. Captain Walker concluded with a warning about the parameters of acceptable behavior in his station.
"Consider yourself on notice, Barnes. Dismissed."
"Thank you, sir." Barnes left the office seething, his ruddy complexion becoming redder. If he didn't care for Johnny before, he liked him even less now. The way Barnes saw it, Gage was the cause of what was wrong with his world. Barnes was seeking a scapegoat to cover his own shortcomings. Johnny made an excellent one.