Chapter 2: What's On Benji's Mind?

Kevin's POV

We arrived home at 8:30pm, and as soon as I got up to my room to change into a clean shirt and sweatpants I noticed that Benji's things were all over my room.

"Hey Ben! Your things are here, they are in my room!" I called, wondering if he was too busy to notice. It took a while before he responded;

"Oh thanks Kevin! Sorry, I'm looking for something important." I watched as he scrambled around the room, seemingly looking for something, some book no doubt. When he finally found it a small sigh escaped his lips, and then he started to put away the rest of his things. He had suddenly gone quiet so I decided to break the ice;

"Hey, Ben?"

"Yeah? What is it?" He turned to face me, pausing in putting his things away. Now, think of something to say to make this not so damn awkward!

"Ummm..Ted is on tonight, do you want to watch it together?" The other boy smiled wildly at my suggestion. Thank God he wasn't going to act all weird on my ass.

"Sure! I have heard it's a great movie, really funny too! Just let me get changed into my pyjama's first." I nodded, turning away from him to give him some privacy to change, after all it was only decent. I wouldn't like it if some guy was perving on me getting changed, wait...did I just say perving? Ignore that!

Once he was changed he joined me on my bed, adjusting his baggy pyjama bottoms accordingly. Immediately I picked up the television remote and switched it on. As expected the movie was just starting, and for once I actually felt relaxed like this. No awkward conversation, no small talk. Just genuine laughter about the movie. It was a nice change.

The movie ended when it was just shy of 10:30pm on my wall clock. Maybe it would be a good idea to get some sleep, after all, you never knew what was around the corner nowadays. I yawned loudly as I switched the television off.

"Hey, maybe we should sleep. It's 10:30pm."

"You go on ahead, there is something I do every night before I go to sleep," Benji smiled uneasily at me for a moment. "Don't worry, I will join you soon."

As the other boy slipped off my bed I just pulled the covers over me and closed my eyes, wondering just how long he would be. I didn't fancy being woken up at 1am in the morning because of him.

It took about fifteen minutes before I heard a book hit the floor softly and felt his body get into the bed with me. I stiffened for a moment before relaxing. A small sigh escaped his lips as he settled down.

"Goodnight Kev," He murmured, barely above a whisper.

"Night..."

I couldn't sleep. All night I was tossing and turning, and when I woke up I noticed it was 2am. It just felt like something was on Benji's mind and I needed to find out just what it was. So, I slipped out of bed as quietly as possible as not to awaken the sleeping boy beside me and walked over to where that book lay on the floor. It had a worn out cover, so I figured it must have been old. Taking a deep shaky breath I opened the first page only to realise this wasn't just a book. This was Benji's diary! I had no idea he even had one.

I felt a cold sweat consume me as temptation stood right in my face. A part of me didn't ever want to snoop on him, because man I would hate it if that happened to me. But another part wanted nothing more than to find out just what was on his mind recently. Sadly the entries were coded, and I just had no idea how to translate it.

'Now...who would know how to crack this code?' I thought to myself, as my ears heard Benji's soft breathing echo around the room. Okay, I had to make a phone call, and a quiet one at that!

"Kevin, it's 2am! Why the fuck are you calling me?! I rubbed my head at hearing her loud voice. Gwen was never usually so loud but, maybe it was because I was tired.

"It's about Benji's diary." I started.

"Why the hell do you have that?!" She cried, and immediately I wondered if he could hear her loud voice from in bed. God, that woman sometimes!

"Look I am sorry for waking you, but I am worried about him. He is acting weird about what he wrote in the diary so I need your help to decode it. Please?" I heard her sigh on the other end of the phone, causing a horrible sweat to consume me. I hated whispering, it made everything seem so damn secretive and I hated secrets!

"...fine, but if he finds out I am blaming you for this!" Yes that was fine, I had no issues with that. I just needed to know. It was like I just couldn't rest without finding out the reasons for his behaviour.

"Okay...well take a photograph of it and send it me, then I should be able to decode it." I nodded, and did as she told me, even though I was worried the flash might wake Benji up. Thankfully he never uttered a peep and stayed asleep. Once the photo was sent it took a while for Gwen to reply. I figured because she was busy figuring out what it said.

"Okay...I think I have the gist of what it says..." She murmured, her voice dropping an octave. Now I really wanted to know. It was like spying on presents before it was my birthday.

"Are you sure you want to know?" Her voice sounded pained for a moment.

"Yes please." She sighed softly, before re-telling the diary entrant back to me in an even voice.

"Okay, it says: 'Dear Diary, today was a very interesting turn of events. I made my crush blush today, which was totally unexpected. And I also managed to beat an odd monster named Malgrum. What a score! And now I am sleeping over at his house and I swear my emotions just constantly go crazy. Like I am on drugs or something. Every time I see his eyes on me...it does strange things to me. Like everything is a dream. But I have a feeling things are going to get better with him by my side, like I can be myself without being judged or looked down upon. But somehow I don't think he sees me like that...like we are just friends or whatever. That saddens me. But'.." Gwen paused, and immediately I could feel my heart leaping in my chest. Was all this about...me? No it couldn't be! Benji would never think that way about me, would he? And why the hell would he write it down in a book?!

"Is...that it?" I struggled to ask, frightened my voice might break on me. Then I heard her voice again;

"No, there is more. Sorry I had to grab a drink and catch my breath. I'm not used to reading so much. Man, I knew my cousin could write but Jesus, I never expected this!" I smirked, thankful that Gwen seemed to be okay reading her cousin's diary entrants to me. I had thought she would go nuts at me or something.

"Okay...let's continue," She muttered, taking a deep breath. "...'When I am alone with my crush my mind wonders about other things, things that I usually wouldn't even dream of thinking. It's like every time he looks at me my skin becomes alive with electricity. And I can't stop thinking about him! I don't really know everything about him, but I am just excited to be around him. Like his aura is electric, or something. Okay, I'm rambling. But seriously I have never felt butterflies before...you must be my one and only...'..."

I paused, feeling my hands tremble while holding the phone. His one and only? Did he stop writing then or what? What the hell was this about? He had a crush on a boy?

"Is that everything?" I asked, feeling how dry my throat had become. There was a brief pause.

"It's says...my one and only..." There was another pause before I felt my heart stop in my chest; "...Kevin." This couldn't be true! Benji liked me? But how? I mean...I had liked him for a long time, so long I can't even remember when it started. But...he liked me?

"Oh my God!" I exclaimed, suddenly remembering to keep my voice at a quiet level. "I had no idea he felt like that..."

"Is it a good thing?" Gwen asked, the uncertainty ringing in her voice. I shrugged my shoulder's, realising she couldn't see what I was doing.

"Ummm yeah, I guess. I have liked him for a while, I just...never thought for a second he would like me too..." Maybe it would take time for everything to sink in, I mean it's not everyday you find out the one person you have a major crush on likes you back. So did that mean he was Gay?

"Well...I must admit I am a little shocked, but if it makes him happy then that is all that matters." I smiled softly, eternally grateful for all her help.

"Thank you Gwen,"

"No problem, just call me at a more sociable hour next time! Good night!" Then the conversation ended.

I sighed softly, deciding to put the diary back where I found it as not to cause any problems between Benji and I. He didn't need to know about any of this. If he did then it might jeopardise everything. But as I got back into bed and lay beside him I found myself smiling wildly. Maybe things weren't so bad after all?