It took longer than I thought, sorry for this. From now, I`ll try to post chapters every two weeks.

A choir of clear voices soared into the night sky, floating into the dark firmament. A shadow, as if symbolizing the grief of Ost-in-Edhil`s gathered inhabitants, was obscuring the sky, so that no star shone through the veil, and only pale light of the moon allowed to discern the figures, centred around a cluster of several newly formed mounds. The white walls of the town loomed nearby, a river branch was wrapped in a gray band of fog, that reached out the long, pallid fingers towards the meadows and the water it carried condensed on the blades of grass growing there in a silvery drops. Everything was dimmed, as if covered with a silk cloth or painted in dark watercolour paints.

At the head of the group stood Celeborn, Galadriel and Celebrimbor. Galadriel, dressed in a pale dress, sang in Quenya, raising her arms high, as if calling the Valar to be her witness. Her deep voice combined with others in a mournful chorus. Her long hair flew down her shoulders, a moonlight suppressed their golden glow, so they gleamed silvery, just like her husband`s, who was standing next to her. The sadness of her long life, which she usually concealed so carefully, now flowed from her like water from an overfilled goblet.

Ai firin, man avánier!

Nai ómanúmenyaron tulyastë

tierisse minna i Mandos

ar nai i Fuine laractastë tierisse ata…

When she stopped, Celeborn took the initiative, telling about the life of those, who, by the corrupt nature of Arda, were forced to abandon their bodies. He didn`t omit their stumbles and failures, which were after all an important aspect of their lives. Some of the elves joined the pair when others stood with their heads bowed, their faces gleamed with sadness, resignation and anger. Celebrimbor was among those silent, but he stood with his fists clenched, and on his hardened, emotionless face only sometimes flashed his eyes, red-hot with anger.

I stood a few meters away from the group dressed in a formal dress, woven from some light material. Alcar settled himself on the rock by my side, so that our heads were at almost the same height. The falcon waved sometimes with his silvery feathers to shake off moisture, but otherwise sat motionless, staring with nearly unblinking eye into the darkness. His body was girded with by two straps, the longer one covered his chest and stiffened both wings at the top and the shorter stiffened the darts and his tail. Needless to say, Alcar wasn`t thrilled by this solution. However, this technique was known to me from the practices on the veterinary studies and I was pleasantly surprised when I learned that elves also know how to use it.

Singing falled suddenly and died in one long tone. The Elves, gathered there came, one by one, to the mounds, placing on them the bunches of knotted branches and flowers. I could not go out of town, so I had only a few wild flowers to offer. I place one at each of the mounds, their red petals gleamed accusingly. `Stop it` I scolded myself again. `It's not your fault. '

While I was returning, my eyes fell on Liria, my friend, with whom I used to go hunting. Tears glistened on her cheeks as she watched without a word a mound, lying far left, which contained Finarin`s body within itself. I felt a pang in my heart. She and Finarin recently got married and would have lived together for many centuries. Again, I was overcome by guilt. I lifted my head to throw a glare in the direction of Celebrimbor, just to see that he beat me to it. His eyes bored into me like drills, but I didn`t give ground to him. I was angry too. I wanted to rebuke him even further, but in the end I dropped my gaze with a sigh. There is no point in worsening my still not too good reputation.

Two days later, the dawn found me sitting on the walls of the city, observing water birds, which floated above the river. In the back of my mind I felt Alcar`s jealousy – he couldn`t fly for several days and it seemed he would remain grounded for a few more weeks. I convinced him to spend most of this time in the hunting lodge, near the eastern gate, where there has always been someone, and to where I decided to move after this whole cave disaster. I did not want to be under one roof with Cartelion and Celebrimbor in his current state. I did not want to risk that some 'accident' would happen to Alcar, while alone in my room. At the same time I lost all hope for any more discrete tracking of Cartelion, but I didn`t care about it that much - Alcar has never managed to track down anything vital, beyond that one night.

~ Hey! The next time you will be following the prey and I will be sitting, while pondering the meaning of life, if it does not suit you!" I heard the irritated voice in the back of my head.

~ It`s called planning, Alcar" I answered him patiently.

~ Well, whatever. But you can do your 'planning' on your way to Galadriel, to whom, as you well remember, you were supposed to go yesterday, after you clear your weapon and clothes and look to the leg of this horse, which you insisted to do and which took you a surprisingly long amount of time."

"Yes, yes, I know!" I interrupted him. He became so grouchy since he broke his wing!

But he was right, of course. Just when I realized that I would probably be forced to summarize for Galadriel everything that had happened since I met Cartelion, including the fight with a werewolf, there suddenly were dozens of excuses and hundreds of other things to do. I had no idea how to convince her that it was not me who standing behind the last attack of Orcs, but Cartelion. She seemed to be more reasonable and calmer than Celebrimbor, but I had no guarantee that she would believe me. Besides there was a feeling that bothered me from some time, the growing suspicion that all my actions are drastically changing the course of history, which I did not want to change. Eventually, the final ending appeared to be the happy one. What if I change the story so much that everything would collapse? I wondered if Eru actually gave me a free hand and I was afraid of the answer to that question. On the other hand, history may have been changed already, that wouldn`t have surprised me much, based on recent events. What if only some specific action from my part could steer it back to the track? I didn`t even know if it was time travel or space travel. Or maybe both? I covered my eyes with a silent moan.

In the end I decided that I would listen to Alcar. What is to be will be, it does not make any sense to postpone it. I did not have much choice anyway. I only hoped that the future Queen of Lorien wouldn`t force me to reveal everything for her help. I preferred to keep to myself the information about who I really am and where I came from, as long as possible.

I broke the connection with the falcon, and slipped out of the wall on the stairs, which went down a narrow street. I turned at the corner of a house, heading to the west of the city. I had not even looked at the sun to assess the right direction – my elven senses coped with it quite well. The worst thing was my orientation in the field. I`ve always been awful at it as a human, and although my current state helped me a little, I was stillthe object of Liria`s jokes, when we hunted together. The fact that I had never once gotten lost for more than a few hours when I was alone, I owe perhaps only to a lucky chance and a compass in my brain.

I have just left one of the main streets and I was about to turn on a path that led directly to Galadriel`s house, when I heard someone calling my name. I turned and saw Liria, who was walking in my direction. Slinging across her back was the short bow and a quiver, made from a tanned skin, full of arrows, fletched with feathers from a pheasant. Beside her walked the tall Elf with hair in the same pale yellow colour, in whom I recognized Laren, Liria`s brother. They were very much alike, except that Liria was a lot shorter than he, cheerful and witty, and he seemed to be more quiet and calm. This time, however, it was almost the opposite, it was Liria that seemed subdued and quiet, and Laren tried to cheer her up.

"Good morning, Liria, Laren" I greeted them, looking at my friend with a concern. Glow of her feä was weak and uneven, she probably forgot to hide it. Her eyes too were pale and bland, and the corners of her mouth fell slightly, as her upper eyelids - the unmistakable grimace of sorrow. "What brings you here?" I asked after a moment.

"I wished to persuade Liria to train with someone on the archery field, but, as I was never good at it, I thought we will go and fetch one of the hunters" explained Laren in his calm voice. "We just saw you on the way and..."

"Please, brother, I am not inarticulate" Liria smiled at him slightly, but the smile did not reach her eyes, which were darker than normal. She looked back at me. "I wondered if you would find some time...?"

I was about to accept her proposal when I remembered where I was going and for what purpose. I grimaced. "I am sorry, but I was going to Galadriel. I just wanted to speak with her ... I wish to ask her about something important."

"Oh, but she is probably now at Celebrimbor`s. We saw her walking into that direction, so you would have to turn around to catch her. " replied Liria, looking at me uncertainly. Probably few were going to the Lady of Light 'just to talk'.

I thanked her and I passed them to go into that direction, when it occurred to me that after all I would have to go to the Gwaith-i-Mirdain`s headquarters, a place that I preferred to avoid for the time being. I had no desire to have any secret conversations there, as I did not want to be overheard. 'In the evening' I promised myself and turned again to catch up with Liria and Laren. I immediately congratulated myself for that decision, as Liria was clearly pleased. I told her to meet me at the field in a few minutes, said goodbye to Laren and ran for my bow, which I left in the hunting lodge. I grabbed my bow, but Alcar caught me before I could get out and I had to put up with his nagging about my person, which leaves everything at the last moment, for a few good minutes. In the end I had enough of this and I simply left the house, ignoring his piercing screeches and puzzled looks, casted me by two other elves, who happened to be there. With bow slinging across my back I rushed to the meeting place to spend a few pleasant hours with a friend before having to speak with Mrs Ost-in-Edhil.

When I reached the square, Liria stood before one of the targets, sending arrow after arrow, and the wind blew her blond hair. I walked over to her quietly, not wanting to disturb her concentration, but she immediately turned around, hearing my steps. I should really practise my sneaking. She smiled at me in a friendly way, and I was full of admiration, not finding any trace of sadness on her face. Only hands that clutched a bow a little too tightly and a tense demeanour betrayed her true emotions.

"There you are" she said, sliding stray strands behind a pointy ear. "What took you so long? Have you lost your desire to practise, knowing that you are no match for me?"

I smiled to myself, seeing something return of the old Liria, the one that I used to call the imp in my mind, due to her relatively short stature (could not have been more than 160 centimetres) and a sharp tongue.

"From what I remember," I bit off, "the last time, I had more hits in the head and it was not me who broke two arrows on the stand."

"No, because yours prefer the ground" Liria said with a small twinkle in her eye. "And mind you, I was not trying to cut off my hand with a string, several times."

"Oh, be quiet, you have won!" I said, chuckling. I leaned the tip of the bow against my ankle and put on the string. Then I set up on an adjacent track. "I am still working on my posture. Sometimes my hand twitches and arrows fly a little to the left. I had to correct my course every time."

"Lean your elbow a little, the hand will be more stable and the string will not strike you" She advised, looking at me sideways, as she was aiming at a target, with the string close to her nose. After a moment she let go of it, releasing her breath. The arrow hit a half inch from the centre of the target. "You see, nobody is perfect!" she summed up, pulling another arrow.

I snorted and pulled the bow. While I was sending more shots to their destination I felt most of the stress, grief and tiredness flowing from me. It was just me and the target in front of me and the rhythm of inhales and exhales. For a moment I could forget about all problems and relax.

After training I went with Liria to sit in the shade of a tree, growing on the edge of the square, to eat breakfast. So we sat, munching bread and cheese and talking about trivial matters, each wanting to forget the events of the past days. The reality, however, soon made itself felt when Liria invited me to the hunting.

"Apparently there is a herd of a plump deer in the area" she told me. "Rarely such game ventures so close to the city. Come with me, we can have some fun before... before something happens again." Her voice broke at the end of the sentence, turning to the whisper. She bowed her head and her lips tightened slightly.

I felt a little uneasy - in my previous life I was rather a loner and I didn`t always know how to behave when the other person was in a difficult situation. In the end I put a hand on her shoulder and said quietly:

"Do not despair, he is now in Mandos, and when he returns to himself, you will see him again. He will come one day healed and joyful, and you will feel as if this separation meant nothing." I almost winced, hearing how pathetic it sounds.

She looked at me with a gaze, in which grief mingled with hope. "Not everyone is coming back" she said, wiping her moist eyes.

"But he has too many reasons to do so," I continued, surprised that my approach actually was working.

Then I saw as her feä changed, brightening slightly, and her face was lit with a smile. "Thank you," she said, her voice became once again as clear and strong as before. "So, will you come with me? Will we hunt together?"

I opened my mouth to agree to her proposal when I remembered Celebrimbor`s ban. I frowned, shaking my head. "Forgive me, Liria, but ... I cannot."

"Why?" She asked, looking at me with amazement - Celebrimbor decided that until the situation is cleared, he will not advertise it.

"I ..." strained mind in search of some excuse, but nothing came to me head. "You see, I ..."

"Please tell me, Talia," she said, squeezing my hand. "You know you can count on me."

I rolled my eyes. Let it be her way. I told her in a hushed voice about what happened in the gorge, how... how I pulled the werewolf from my companions, distracted him and managed to pierce him with my sword and about the argument with Celebrimbor. I summarized the result of months of tracking Cartelion and my suspicions regarding the Elf. I stopped short of describing how I unintentionally broke into his mind. I could not. Just as I could not tell her about the real fight with the wolf. Something in me was blocking it, something which made a lot easier to lie than to recall those memories. Because behind them came others and they didn`t belong to me. Memories of killing other beings with mad joy, blood on the tongue and bones crackling between fangs, memories of orders given by a Being, whose every word cut like a whip and each order was the meaning of existence. I held my mind, before it could wander too far and looked at Liria, who was silent all this time. I flinched when he saw in her eyes a mixture of horror, anger and disbelief.

"Are you telling me that this bastard is behind the death of Finarin and so many others?" She shouted, leaping to her feet. "And Celebrimbor, rather than getting rid of him, allows him to put all the blame onto you?"

"Please, Liria, quieter," I said, raising my hand. She was right, of course, but still. "I do not want everyone to know about it."

"Why not?" She cried, her eyes were lit with a desire for vengeance. Too late I realized that I unintentionally gave her something that you should not give to the person in despair - a scapegoat. "Let this brood of Morgoth get what he deserves."

"Because I have no evidence, apart from what I saw!" I said, lowering his voice. "Celebrimbor will not believe me. The worst thing, I have only a month and no idea how to find it."

"And you did not go with this to Galadriel yet, because?" She asked, a glow in her eyes softened a little.

"I'm not sure what to say and ..." I trailed off.

"And you did not tell me everything, right?" Liria finished with a sigh.

I looked into her eyes. "Yes" I replied simply.

"Good," she said, leaned forward and began to pack their things.

"Where are you going?" I asked, surprised.

"Do you think that after all that I heard, I will just sit and do nothing?" She said sarcastically, buttoning her bag. "Especially when I found out that all of this may be my fault?"

"What are you talking about?" I gasped.

She turned to me, her eyes held so much grief that I felt pain in my heart. She stood there, looking at me and not knowing what to say. I've never seen her so helpless. I wanted to encourage her somehow, ensure that she can count on me when she said quietly:

"Those situations happen very rarely in our nation, but all of them, without exception are sad and tragic. I should have know that it will not end well, but I was too blinded by my own happiness, to pay attention to someone of whom I did not even wanted to think about much. " I wanted to ask her what she meant, but I decided to keep quiet. She will not stop now, when she already began.

"He always seemed so calm and composed. Therefore, when I sensed his feelings for me, I decided not to keep him longer in hope, but explain to him, just like that, that he will not have any future with me. I did not know Finarin then, who lived in Lindon at that time, but I knew I would never feel what he did. But he did not take it well. The next day, he went into the mountains, apparently, 'in a search of some valuable deposits'. When he returned a few months later, you could sense a change in him. He looked ill, but when I approached to speak with him, I was greeted by a smile and a nice word, as if nothing ever happened between us. I was surprised, of course, but I decided to drop it, satisfied that it does not hurt him as much as I thought. Oh, if I knew how wrong I was!" She exclaimed painfully.

I stared at her with wide eyes. She and Cartelion? Did I become so paranoid, that I believed in conspiracy, coup and dark powers, when the reason was as simple as a broken heart? Was the target not Celeborn, or Celebrimbor, but Finarin, the Elf who took what was denied to Cartelion? Yes, it would be extremely cruel and unusual action in a society of elves, particularly in times of peace and healing wounds, but I felt stupid that I did not think of that. After all, I am still a human in my heart! How could I forget about all those things which my real race was capable of?

"I ... do not know what to say," I said uncertainly. The memory of his mind was still bothered me. It was so dark, so ... evil. And what about the raven, and the Dark Speech? "Are you sure Cartelion would be capable of something like this?" I asked anyway.

"I do not know, Talia!" she exclaimed. She closed her eyes and let out a slow breath. "I do not know," she repeated quietly, opening his eyes. "But I have to look him in the eye when I ask him about it. Do not let him lie."

Wave of foreboding feelings washed over me, so strong that I could not ignore them. " Liria, do not do this" I said with certainty, that surprised me too. "You will discover nothing in this way, and he could be dangerous."

She issued a bitter laugh. "What worse can Cartelion do to me than confirm my suspicions?" I wanted to say something, but she didn`t let me. " Besides it was Finarin who was supposed to die, not me. He would not be able to do this. You do not have to worry about me. As for truth, I will squeeze it out of him, believe me. And if in this way I will help you shake off those false accusations, the better."

Having said this, she turned on her heel and walked confidently toward the Gwaith-and-Mirdain`s headquarters. I should have stopped her, tell her what I saw in the Noldo`s mind, convince her to wait a little bit. But I did not do this. I did not know what is true and what is not anymore. Months of asking myself the same questions undermined my confidence. Why should the Elf not kill for love, you know the story of Maeglin, do you not? The explanation so simple that it must be true. Besides, the bad memories began to mix with my nightmarish dreams, and I could not confidently describe what I really saw anymore. So I did not say anything and didn`t stop my friend, despite the growing sense of uneasiness. And while I was standing there, being in two minds, Liria disappeared among the trees.