Only Kevin Owens could book a match called the 'America Sucks Fatal-Four Way' and a shame he wasn't there to see it as he screeches down the city streets of Columbus, camera crew in the backseat filming everything.
Back at the Nationwide Arena, Neville, King Barrett, Sheamus and Cesaro go toe to toe in attempts to come out on top as the best foreign pro-wrestler in the company. Cesaro's frankly a bit pissed off that he was booked in a mid-card match, considering he's the leader of one main factions in the WWE. The match comes to a head as King Barrett eats a Red Arrow from Neville who nearly gets the three count before Cesaro breaks up the pin. Cesaro takes Neville for a spin before launching him into Barrett who was more or less an innocent bystander trying to crawl back into the ring. Cesaro sends Barrett over the top rope into ringside before contorting Neville into the Sharpshooter. Neville has no other option but to tap out, making Cesaro the first ever winner of the America Sucks match.
The titantron cuts back to footage of Owens driving in Cole's sportscar as they grind to a halt on the bridge Seth described. Owens releases a sigh of relief as he sees Seth and Dean who are still on the bridge, throwing punches at each other as each look close to collapsing. "PIN HIM, SETH," Owens roars, pushing out a referee in the passenger seat who he'd kidnapped from the parking lot. Like any Chicago Street Fight, pinfalls count anywhere, so Seth could win on the goddamn Main Street Bridge for all Owens cared.
The camera shakes as the crew get out of Cole's car, trying to get a better shot of the bridge brawl. Dean ducks a right hook from Seth, spinning around and clotheslining the Legion 2IC across the chest, onto the pavement. The goddamn Lunatic that Dean is, he begins to climb the barrier of the bridge until fully balanced on the top metal rung. He looks down to Seth, rolling his hands to signify an impending elbow drop. Seth shouts something that's too far from the camera to hear before the picture shakes and Owens yells out "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!"
When the camera stabilises, Seth is grabbing onto Dean's hands as if too pull him back down but Dean is shouting and trying to writhe out of his former brother's grip. Suddenly, Dean loses balance and Seth gets pulled up and over the banister before both men are sent tumbling into the Scioto River.
"SETH," Owens roars before turns to the camera, pushing the lens away from him, "GET THAT FUCKING THING AWAY FROM ME AND DO SOMETHING!". The sound of the camera hitting the ground causes the image to crackle out before the screen goes black. A couple seconds later there is a cut back to ringside with JBL, Cole and Lawler looking stunned.
The PPV continues as per Owens' instructions on the crumpled piece of paper. The next match is between Tyler Breeze and his mentor at ringside R-Truth vs Zack Ryder who arrives with the still injured Cena joining as Zack's manager on commentary. Cena puts Zack over repeatedly while slandering Damien Sandow after being questioned about the man who put him out of action. R-Truth gets pissed off at this, staunching over to have an argument with Cena. Cena retaliates and it looks like the two veterans are about to fight before Tyler is distracted by them, "Um, excuse me? Can you stop your squabbling and focus on me?" Tyler turns around only to be hit with the Rough Ryder and Zack takes the win.
The titantron cuts to a promo with Owens who has returned backstage at the PPV. Tom Phillips comes up to ask him for specific details about what happened on the Main Street Bridge. Are Seth and Dean okay? Were they found? What's going on?! Owens smacks the microphone out of Phillips' hand, calls him a 'short nerd' and proceeds to start ripping up everything backstage.
"AAAWWWWWWH KEVIN OWENS!"
For what seems to be Owens' worst nightmare, the New Day arrive to inform Owens not to be sour and to trust in the Legions soon to be three-time-champs that they will bring back Seth Rollins with their unicorn magic. If they successfully complete the task, then they need to be promised a title shot with the Primetime Players the next day on Raw. Owens looks way past the point of angry and gives in with silent loathing. "Fine."
Kofi, Big E and Xavier cheer each other on victoriously. They did it! They got the big boss to give them a title shot! Time to show the Primetimes who are the real Champions around here.
"Only if you bring Rollins back," Owens reminds them. "Go. Now."
The New Day giggle before clambering over each other and run out of frame. Owens sinks into a chair and puts his face into his hands with a muffled growl. Running a PPV is so much harder than it looks.
The PPV is on the home stretch (much to Owens' relief) as its time for the main event. Rusev defending his Intercontinental Championship in a No-DQ match against Bray Wyatt. The bought is as vicious as one would assume, with Wyatt bringing in his whole family to beat up Rusev every time he gets thrown to ringside. The Russian brute proves his name by kicking out over and over and over, despite how badly he is beaten. He was supposed to get backup after all but almost everyone in the Legion had been beaten or was MIA, either from the PPV itself or an earlier date.
With very little options left, Owens' theme hits when it seems like Rusev is close to losing the IC title but is intercepted by the Wyatts at the bottom of the ramp. Without Rollins, there is no way Owens can outmatch a three on one and is brutally beaten by the family until he's left out cold on the ramp. As Bray is about to lay down the winning pin, Bo Dallas' theme hits and he runs out with a mic, yelling "BROTHER, STOP!" The Wyatts charge up the ramp at Bo but Bray stops them by screaming for them to cease the attack. The distraction allows Rusev to low blow Bray with the Legion's flag before winning by rollup pinfall.
"BO!" Bray screams viciously as Dallas freezes up with fear before retreating backstage.
The classic Wyatt terror package flashes on the titantron and the lights go out. When they return, the Wyatts are gone. With laboured breaths, Rusev collects himself grabbing his title but leaving the flag in the ring. He exits before slinging Owens' arm over his shoulders to help the leader of the Legion of Ruination backstage.
Cole's wrapping up the PPV in the standard way before Lawler interrupts him, "Hang on, what happened to Seth Rollins and Dean Ambrose?…"
"AAAAAAWWWWWWWWWW COLUMBUS! DON'T YOU DARE BE SOUR, CLAP FOR YOUR SOON TO BE THREE-TIME-CHAMPS AND FEEEL THE POOWAAAAAAAARRRRRR! ITS A NEW DAY, YES IT IS!"
The New Day come out clapping admit a sea of "NEW DAY SUCKS" chants. They cut a promo on how good they are and as promised, they brought back not only Seth Rollins but Dean Ambrose and therefore they will be meeting the Primetime Players tomorrow in-ring to return the Tag Team Title back to its rightful owners. To prove to Kevin Owens that they truly are the best and most faithful members of the Legion, would everyone please turn their attention to the screen. The titantron shows a CCTV feed of the WWE's medical bay except the beds are dishevelled and empty with the med staff knocked out and sprawled across the room.
"Huh?! Where are–"
Xavier squeals and points up to nearby stage scaffolding, where Ambrose is hanging ten feet in the air with a massive grin on his face. Drenched from head to toe, Dean jumps from the scaffolding onto all three members of the New Day, knocking all of them out. Rollins runs out from backstage (also completely drenched in river water) and dropkicks Dean over the New Day. The audience goes insane which nearly blows the damn ceiling off the Nationwide Arena. The two boys brawl down to the ring where Seth powerbombs Dean onto the ring apron ala Kevin Owens. Dean is writhing on the ringside mats in pain and Seth pulls him up by his hair to roll him back into the ring.
Seth motions over John Cone ("Do your job, dumbass!") from the timekeep's area and the match is back in full swing as the Legion 2IC covers Dean, who kicks out at two and a half. Seth's furious at this point and with the last little bit of adrenaline he has left, he gets the only weapon he can find, Rusev's Legion flag and begins to wallop Dean repeatedly with it. "IS THIS WHAT YOU WANTED DEANO?" he splutters, whacking the flagpole on Dean's head a couple times. The lunatic looks up, eyes dilated and blood seeping from his forehead, "IS THIS WHAT YOU WANTED? YOU WERE RIGHT. YOU NEVER SHOULD HAVE TRUSTED ME. I USED YOU. YOU AND ROMAN. AND LOOK WHERE I AM NOW. I WAS THE CHAMP AND NOW I'M THE SECOND IN COMMAND OF THE MOST POWERFUL ORGANISATION EVER TO GRACE THE WWE. YOU ARE NOTHING." Seth blinks back tears, "NOTHING BUT A CRAZY… PSYCHOTIC–"
Dean rolls onto his back and spits in Seth's eye. The former Champ's mouth twitches in outrage, casting the flag to the side and kicking Dean in the side. The lunatic grimaces weakly as he's pushed over onto his front, back raised as he hugs in stomach in pain. Seth slowly hovers his foot just over Dean's neck. It's an ode to the time before the rebellion. How long as it been since anyone had seen Seth's curbstomp? A flicker of the architects old ways suddenly come rushing back. "Say goodbye, Deano–"
*GONG*
The lights vanish and after a moment, a spotlight illuminates the misty stage. Two figures can be seen and as the smoke begins to clear, a masked Undertaker is hunched over menacingly, face completely shrouded by his cloak. Beside him… stands Roman Reigns. Seth looks up and scampers backwards, tripping over Dean. The lunatic barely manages to slide his face to view the stage, clenching his eyes shut in regret as he sees Roman. What an idiot he'd been. Of course, Roman had come to be his saving grace. He should have just let Roman help him in the first place. 'I'm sorry' he mouths, pressing his forehead into the ringmat.
The Undertaker slowly makes his way down to the ramp and enters the ring, stepping over Dean to approach Seth, who looks spooked as hell and is backing up on his ass. Seth is begging, "Nononononono, come on, man, please don't do this, I'm sorry alright, you can have him I–"
Seth's neck is caught by a chokehold and as The Undertaker pulls the boy up, the hood falls back over his head to reveal…
"TRIPLE H?!" Seth squeaks in horror with an expression like he just soiled his ringgear. What the hell? What the hell is going on? Why is Triple H wearing the Undertakers' gear? Why is he coming out to the Undertaker's theme? Why are his eyes completely white?!
Triple H lets out a low rasp from the back of his throat, throwing off the cloak to reveal a new, Untertaker-inspired look on his ringgear. Everything about his mannerisms suggest that he is the Dead Man but it is clearly the Game wearing the mask. Triple H/Undertaker(?) shoves Seth back against the ropes where he bounces back into a hold around his middle and is turned upsidedown.
"Nonononononono!" Seth begs as Triple H slowly turns around.
The ground comes up to meet Seth as Triple H Tombstone Piledrives him, nudging his former prodigy's limp body away. The Game drag's Dean's limp body to drape his arm over Seth's shoulders. The referee slides next to the two men, thumping the mat for one.. two.. THREE!
The Game slowly stands before throwing a fist up as thunder cracks and the Undertaker's theme echoes through the arena.
Roman runs down to the ring with medical staff, not allowing anyone to help Dean onto the stretcher but himself. The PPV ends with Roman glancing back to the ring at Triple H with an anxious fear in his eyes. It's as if he's praying for validation that he did the right thing, whatever it was to get the Undertaker's puppet to save his brother.