A/N: I'm...still alive?

Yes!

So sorry guys. My excuse is always the same. I've been really busy. School play, project season, extracurricular things. All that jazz. But I'm back now, so I hope you all forgive me!

Hope you all have a happy holiday!

Enjoy! :3

And you do your best to show me love,

but you don't know what love is.

So are you listening?

So are you watching me?

Well I can't pretend that I don't see this

It's really not your fault

That no one cares to talk about it,

Talk about it

Cause I've seen love die

Way too many times

-Paramore 'Emergency'

I'm kind of nervous about today's meeting with Zaraki. There's only two more meetings until I start school. I've been avoiding the entire reason I'm even in counseling.

I just don't want to have to think about it.

It's been a few months since then, and I've pushed it far back in my brain so I won't have to think about it. It's not healthy, I know, but it works for me. It doesn't hurt so much.

When I hear my name called, I stand. I open the door and walk down the hallway to Zaraki's office. I bump into someone, immediately looking up to tell them to watch it.

But I stay silent.

I recognize long orange hair and the huge rack that cushioned our collision.

No way.

They just won't leave me alone, will they?

"Grimmjow?"

Orihime's soft voice squeaks as she looks at me in astonishment. She's looking at me as if she hasn't seen me in years when it's only been a few months. But I guess I'd look that way too if a friend of mine left me without explanation. Unlike everyone else, Orihime almost looks the same. Her hair is still long. Her big pretty eyes are still shining. She's still pretty short, only reaching my chest. Or maybe I've just grown. Her face is more mature, so she looks more like a woman now.

I still can't stand the way she looks at me. She always looks so full of hope and optimism.

Two things I'm not extremely used to.

And she knows almost nothing about me. If she did, there would never be another smile directed towards me.

"What're you doin' here?" When her face heats up, I realize it came out rude, but I didn't mean it that way.

"O-Oh, I come here for counseling...sometimes," she does that thing where she wraps her hands in the hem of her shirt. I almost grab her wrists because it irritates me.

"Why? What do you need counseling for?"

Again, it probably sounded rude, but I'm just giving up at this point. I've never been able to talk to people besides Renji or Kisuke, let alone girls. But who's to say I didn't mean it? What the hell does Orihime need counseling for? She's got the perfect life. Sure her parents aren't alive anymore, but she's got her brother, and they're set for life.

"Well...my brother..." She pauses. "...passed away this summer..." Tears begin rolling down her cheeks but she doesn't drop her smile.

Nice going, Grimmjow.

I can't believe I didn't know about this. How come no one told me?

Well, it's not like they didn't try. You just decided to shut everyone out, asshole.

I press my forehead in shame.

"And I haven't really had anyone to talk to. Everybody's been so scattered and distant lately. So I've been coming here. Zaraki-san is really nice...and...well, I don't want you worried about this. I'm totally fine!" She grins wide, trying to stop the tears from flowing but it doesn't work. Her lip quivers again and she bites it.

I can't fucking watch this anymore.

With a sigh, I grab her wrist and pull her out of the office.

Zaraki can wait.

"C'mon," I grunt.

"Where are we going?" She sniffles.

"I'm takin' you out."

At the restaurant, I let Orihime order whatever the fuck she wants to because she deserves it.

And shit, she orders a lot.

We eat in silence before she speaks up.

"Wait, didn't you have an appointment? I don't want you to miss it because of me! C'mon, we've still got time!" She stands up and I pull her wrist so she sits back down.

"Orihime, shut up and eat," I say with a full mouth.

"Well, okay."

I want to ask.

I need to.

"So, how did your brother die?"

The color flushes from her face and she swallows nothing, like she's about to puke.

Crap.

"Oh...he was in the wrong place at the wrong time while working. I didn't want to know the details."

"Geez. When was the funeral?"

"Oh, like two months ago. And it wasn't a really big one, There weren't that many people. Just few he knew."

"Hime," I've never said her nickname in public before, so she blushes heavily. "I'm so sorry you were alone."

"Hm?" She cutely slurps up a noodle. "Oh, I wasn't alone! Ulquiorra was with me through it all. I told him I didn't need anything, but he stayed around anyway." Her face falls a bit but I ignore it. I smirk at her when she says this. Orihime looks up at me and blinks. "Why're you looking at me like that?" She asks. I shake my head.

She'll always be clueless.

"You still don't know, do you?" I ask with a shake of my head.

"Know what? Grimmjow, don't mess around!" She pouts and I can't help myself.

"Ulquiorra has been in love with you for as long as he's known you."

There's a silence and I know what's coming next.

"WHAT!?"

People look at us and Orihime covers her mouth. I cover mine too because I'm about to laugh out loud. Her cheeks flush.

"Really?" Orihime asks almost sadly, like I'm just teasing her. "Is that really the truth?"

"Hey, why would I lie about somethin' like that?" I ask and fight the urge to grab her hand over the table.

She buries her face in her hands and there's a silence between us before I call her.

"It's the truth, on my life. What's wrong?" She lifts up her head and I see the the saddest expression I've ever seen.

"He told me. A few days after my brother's funeral, he was helping me move his stuff out. I was just choosing what to keep and give away. I wanted to keep everything." A smile surfaces before it recedes with her next line. "Ulquiorra got impatient and tried to throw away a blanket we always shared on the couch. I-I slapped him as hard as I could..." My eyes widen at this and my jaw drops.

Orihime? Slapping someone? Never in this life.

"Orihime—"

"I didn't mean it, I swear! I was just angry. H-He told me he loved me, but I was too mad. I wasn't ready...I'm still not. I'm scared, Grimmjow. I'm confused..." Her words come out in a nervous flurry, as if she's apologizing to me for what she did. But I don't blame her. When she finishes, she sighs and looks into her lap.

I feel every angry breath that she huffs out. It's familiar to me. The heat that emanates from self-loathing is unmistakable.

I can't let Orihime feel it any longer.

"Hime, listen, you were angry. We all get a little angry sometimes. Ulquiorra wasn't lyin' when he said he loves you, so I bet he's still waitin' for you. All you gotta do is talk to him." Orihime nods before standing.

"You're right!" She shouts drawing attention from everyone in the restaurant. "Thanks Grimmjow! I'll see you later!" She says before leaving.

I chuckle as I watch her run down the street outside the window. I know what your thinking.

Why is Grimmjow acting nice?

Well, I do have a heart, y'know. And who could ever be mean to Orihime? She's one of the kindest people I've ever met. Never has another person been as sweet and selfless and compassionate as she is to me. Sometimes I don't think Ulquiorra deserves her. Yeah, he's stuck to her side like glue for as long as he's known her, but he doesn't show her the love and affection she deserves. She needs to be coddled and cared for, counting all the years she's done that for other people.

Maybe he just doesn't know enough about love to show it yet.

I might have to have a little talk with Cifer the next time I see him.

I bet it's interesting how I'm so close to Orihime without her knowing anything about me. Well, we've known each other since freshman year, and she had a lot of my classes last year.

Oh, and I almost screwed her once.

It's a long story.

Yeah, I know, I owe an explanation.

Not one of my longer chapters, I know, but I wanted to give you guys something. Hope you enjoyed this little 'filler' type chapter. I really just wanted to show Grimmy's soft side before he interacts with Starrk. There is a reason for that, by the way. Next will be a bit more important, so don't worry.

Hope you guys enjoyed this!

R&R!

~EMAE