Air for life

by thebeagle

A story that follows the ninja girl Toshi who's a rebelious orphan. When Kakashi and team 7 is assigned to capture her, they find out that she's quite a handfull, especially for Kakashi. Will she end up in prison? Full summary inside. KakashixOC

18. Air for life Chapter 18

Greetings from Rome! :D

I'm so sorry I haven't updated any sooner, but I've been really busy with birthday, the examine to enter the royal academy of art and other stuff :( But right now I'm sitting in Rome (I live in Denmark) enjoying the sun and the peace, which has helped me write nonestop! Anyways, I'm kind of torn between rewriting some of the older chapters and writing a new chapter. Sorry for that!

A biiiig thanks to everyone who reviewed the latest chapter and to Hell's Butterfly who suggested I write a sequens of Kakashi's thoughts in the shower in chapter 17. I think I might do that soon!

JUST REACHED 100 FOLLOWS, wooooop! That makes me so excited and evne more passioned about writing this story!

This chapter is the longest I've ever posted to date. 26.000 words more or less! Enjoy

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Konoha library was - to put it mildly - completely useless. After having found every single book containing information about the city, the intel was still not satisfying my curiosity. A lot of information were lacking about the ANBU and Root and the more darker days of its history. Surely there was the battle between the first hokage and Madara, but that was common knowledge in this city. What I wanted to know, was the dirty, dark side of Konoha that nobody saw og knew of. The only thing I knew about Root, was that its leader was a man called Danzo and that they worked anonymously in the shadows, while ANBU was more directly under the orders of the hokage.

Disappointed I left the library knowing that it would get me nowhere to keep searching there. I put a hand to my chin as I strode down the street. Konoha had to have some kind of forbidden archive somewhere. The question was where was it, who was in charge and how did I gain access?

As I made my way to the training grounds these questions circled my mind. Understanding the depths of the system almost gave me a headache, but I also knew if I was cunning enough I could get what I wanted, as long as I did it unseen. I knew very well that I was still being watched - by ANBU or Root; I wasn't sure.

I really needed to know why it was always a Root following me on those assassinations. Did that Danzo need to keep me in check? What was the deal? Missions had become increasingly more difficult. I was required to gather more intel myself - intel on location, intel on the subject before I could go and kill the unfortunate soul. I had to know the connection between these people.

Who did I know, who knew anything about a supposed secret archive. Kakashi immediately drifted into my mind. But he was too suspicious and too loyal to give away any information I wanted. I could always ask him subtly and play dumb, ask him who I should talk to, to be allowed into the archive.

"Hey Toshi! Good morning."

Gai's familiar voice roused me out of my thoughts and I made a mental note to ask Kakashi later, now when we were on speaking terms again.

"Good morning Gai." I responded and gave him a tired smile.

There was no telling that Gai had been drinking yesterday. He looked as hyperactive and happy as he always did. With morning exercises consisting of a lap around Konoha, two hundred push ups, a hundred air squats and some yoga we were both ready for todays summoning practice.

Neshkent - the old tiger - greeted me nobly when summoned and told me to be prepared to fight the two cats, preferably in Eien's form.

"Why would they fight me? I'm not going to force them to anything." I said perplexed.

"They're very cunning, capricious cats. They're the best assassins amongst our group, and don't take commands from anybody unless they find you worthy of following. If you're not worthy of the contract, they're most likely going to kill you." The tiger said.

Actually the only thing I cared about in reference to what he said was that they were going to kill me.

"What?! That's a really serious thing to say!" I cried.

"Toshi don't worry, I'll stand by your side!" Gai enthused and gave me his infamous thumbs up.

"If you want to gain their respect you'll have to convince them yourself." Neshkent snapped, his topaz eyes solemn fixating between me and Gai.

"Gai, you'll just have to stand by." I responded as the mood turned deadly serious.

He nodded, that rare serious expression evident in his face.

"Alright, here I go." I muttered and took a strong stance, legs spread wide apart as I bid my thumb.

"Summoning jutsu." I said, trying my hardest to show no fear or anticipation.

I leaped backwards, creating some distance between me and the cats as smog blew up from my hands. With Neshkent by my side and Gai watching from a distance, my fear was calmed by having someone I trust, just in case.

"What's this?"

Shock hit me when I heard a male voice to my left, crouching a bit in defense as I was taken off guard. I hadn't sensed the presence move away from the smog to sneak up on me from my left. A sleek, athletic, graceful and swift predator stood to my left, resembling much a cheetah except it had no spots and its fur was completely white.

"Neshkent."

I gasped involuntary when I heard another voice - female - from my right, and saw the same athletic cat, black as coal and with heaven-blue piercing eyes.

How could I not have felt them flanking me from both sides? I moved backwards a bit to get both cats in front of me where I could see them both.

"Backing down are we?" The black female cat purred sweetly.

There was no making mistakes around these cats. They were exceptionally good at hiding their presence, that fact didn't go unnoticed. Somehow they both reminded me of snakes. Thin and fierce, not in any way trustworthy: venomous. The two cats moved elegantly towards each other, their eyes never wavering one bit from me. They were like ying and yang, the way they moved synchronized.

"Heket, Nephthys. This is Toshi Setsuko, she has signed the contract." The old tiger said, sitting casually in front of me.

Both their eyes snapped promptly to Neshkent, both tilting their heads questioningly before snapping back to me.

"So? Why haven't you killed her yet?" The white male cat asked.

"Are you siding with the human, Neshkent?" The black female added.

For the first time they didn't do anything synchronized. The black female looked at me, giving no hint whatsoever as to what she was thinking.

"Yes I am." The old tiger pushed his chest forward. "She's a capable young ninja, and she shares her soul with Eien." He said proudly.

The white male looked back at me, eyes slightly widened, the female cat still seeming impassive and capricious. While the old tiger spoke, I took in every little detail of the two cats. Higher than the tiger they stood, with a large chest, narrow waist, long thin legs, and a slim well muscled build. Their heads were small and round, set on a long neck, and their tails were long for greater balance. These animals was definitely made for speed.

"What do you say Nephthys? Should we believe this?" The white male said sweetly, his eyes giving me a sense of murderous intent.

"I don't know. Maybe we should test the human." The black female - Nephthys - answered promptly.

"Please believe me. Neshkent is telling the truth." I said and bowed to the two.

For a moment they both seemed to freeze. I straightened up confused at their silence, feeling every muscle in my body getting alert. They both broke into a condescending laughter while I just stood, unsure about what to do and completely unable to read the two.

"So you think you got friends in high places?" The white said.

"With the power to make us obey?" The black said.

"No, that wasn't what I meant. I can show you her form." I explained, growing weary as they started to move to both my sides, their eyes locked on me.

"And why should that make us help you?" The white male answered sweetly.

"If your power and goal is worthy, maybe we won't kill you." The black female added.

"All I ask is for you to lend me your powers." I responded, starting to grow highly alert.

They were about to attack. Despite their small sizes, I felt like I was being stalked by predators. Everything about them screamed of no mercy. I realized I'd been moving slowly backwards, Neshkent suddenly far in front of me, watching silently. Despite having talked my case, he had warned me that there was nothing more he could do. I was slowly realizing there was nothing I could say that would help me avoid a fight.

"Well forgive us these smiles on our faces." The white one hissed.

"You'll know what power is when we are done, girl." The black said.

"You will kneel before us."

"Kneel to our splendorous power."

"You will bow down."

"Or it's your own grave you'll dig, girl."

"You're playing with the big cats now." The male bristled, both having circled in on me.

I took in a deep breath, as the whole training ground seemed to be holding its breath.

"Not so fast is she?" In the blink of an eye I froze when the black female balanced, light as a feather, on my shoulder.

Before I could react, only able to move my arm an inch, her claws tore the shoulder of my vest open as she leaped upwards. I jumped away, immediately creating distance between us, and didn't hesitate to draw out Eien's chakra to hone my instincts and speed. Being used to fighting Gai and Lee, I knew that I could keep up, but was simply taken by surprise. Glancing down at my shoulder I saw the raw pieces of cloth flapping. If that had been my shoulder...

"You two talk too much." I responded neutrally.

They both squinted their eyes at me, the white male baring his teeth the slightest.

"Clearly you're both at a disadvantage in this open space. None of you is build for great power, rather your strength lies in your skills to analyze and kill in the darkness. It's obvious the both of you are assassins." I lowered myself, feeling the ground beneath my feet.

"With that said I'm quite disappointed that none of you have taken your time to get to now me before you charge. Being an assassin myself, I know how important that is." I grinned at the two, hoping to provoke them. If they were anywhere near as proud as Eien, they would take the bait.

"I could easily overpower you out here, so why don't we take this into the forrest for your sake?"

"Don't get so cocky girl!" The white male snarled at me.

"Heket!" The black female snapped, as she looked at her twin, a silent conversation seeming to go on between the two of them.

I grabbed that opportunity to gather Eien's chakra in my feet, and jumped at them in the blink of an eye, launching a heel at the seemingly short tempered white male - Heket. He dodged as anticipated before they were both gone into the forrest.

"I'm going in. Please wait for me out here." I said calmly to Gai and Neshkent, turning around to face the forrest, dulling every fear I had for the twins.

If we were going to play this game, I was definitely going to be the predator.

It was intense to be in such high alert for such a long distance of time. I was constantly subjugated to sneak attacks, and could barely manage to land one scratch at the two cats. Starting to have a shrewd idea that they could communicate silently with each other - after three hours of mind games - I was beginning to work up a plan that could at least separate them for a time.

Being able to hide their presence and blend into the environment, I had a hard time finishing this, and was starting to grow weary. Separating them didn't do much, although I was lucky enough to land a heel at the rips of the black female cat - Nephthys, once. Neshkent conveniently warned me that the cheetahs used poison on their claws, so for now, I had been lucky enough to avoid any contact with those things.

But I wasn't using my full strength. Not anywhere near. To keep the attacking cats at bay I created air currents around myself whenever I felt them lurking around. Although I was faster and stronger than I had ever been, it had been a long time since I had really used Eien's form in battle. Drawing out too much of her chakra would only result in me loosing control or rampaging instead of keeping it cool.

It wasn't until I for the third time had separated the two cats - that I found Heket, the white male alone, in a clearing. I moved silently into a nearby tree, as the athletic cat crouched threateningly in front of a child - a familiar child at that. He had a chip in his tooth and wore a blue scarf, that seemed to be a too long.

Suddenly fearing for the brown haired boy's life, Eien's chakra surged through me and all precautions I had been taking was thrown out the window along with my human body. In an instant I transformed into Eien's large form and lashed instinctively at Heket, knowing that brute force could easily take out the small cheetah's.

While the kid screamed horrified, his boyish voice still coming off girlish, I caught Heket's narrow body between my jaws in an instant, my strength and speed completely taking the cat by surprise. His claws lashed wildly at me, and in my brute attack I sacrificed a few deadly scratches. There was the undeniable difference between brute force and stealth.

I threw him away, tearing skin and fur with me as he bashed into a nearby tree, promptly landing on his feet, bristling at me intensely, completely unaffected by his wounds.

"Heket!" The black Nephthys was halfway down a tree, eyes wide in what could only be horror.

Blood dripped from his sides, loose pieces of skin hanging limply as if someone had tried to peel stripes off of a tiger. Her fierce blue eyes snapped to mine as she froze in place.

"What are you?!" She bristled.

"I told you already. Eien lives inside me." I responded neutrally.

"I won't forgive you!" She hissed, the hairs on her back seeming to spike even more than before.

"Stop it. You can't win. I'm simply too strong. Accept defeat." I raised my head higher and pushed my chest forward to intimidate the two cunning cats.

Nephthys' eyes seemed to loose all hope, before turning awestruck in what could only be realization.

"I see her." She breathed.

The pre-dusk gloom turned every little streak of sun that shone through rustling leafs to golden dots everywhere around the clearing. A breeze stirred the trees as silence lingered between us.

"Don't get fooled Nephthys!" Heket growled, his thing legs shivering in determination.

He recklessly lashed for me, and I crouched watching his incredible speed closely.

"Heket!"

Green eyes widening, I was surprised when the black Nephthys suddenly stood in front of me, facing Heket defensively. It was my first time seeing the two disagreeing on anything.

"She is stronger than us, Heket. If she possesses even a fragment of Eien's skills and power, we're no match. It's obvious she's both stealthy and has a lot of destructive power." The female cheetah explained.

Heket who seemed to be battling with his wounds, glared coldly at his twin, nose wrinkled up in a snarl.

"Look at yourself Heket. You're bleeding all over the place, and I have broken a rib." She continued.

Well, didn't know I had broken one of her ribs. It must've been painful walking around with. I snapped my head to my right where the kid was sitting flabbergasted, watching me with a fear struck expression.

"What're you still doing here kid? Leave already."

But he just watched me, frozen in place as if he was looking at some kind of monster. I moved heavy paws a bit in his direction to face him more, without turning away from the cheetahs.

"Go!" I growled. This seemed to snap him out of it, and he scrambled to his feet before taking off into the bushes.

Turning my attention back to the black and white cats, they were still arguing, the black female seeming to have accepted me.

"You can't be serious Nephthys!" Heket bristled temperamentally.

"You're barely standing." She responded.

His hind legs started buckling.

"Damn you Nephthys!" Was his last words before he evaporated in a gush of smog.

The black feline turned around, her blue eyes fixated upwards at me.

"He'll come around." She said wryly, one of her ears pricking backwards unsure.

"And what about you? What made you change your mind?" I asked guarded.

"Logically I realized you are stronger than us. Neshkent was right."

"Took you long enough to understand."

"Ah, but that is not our way." She scoffed gracefully.

"I figured. Let's find the others then." I suggested.

I followed my nose through the forrest, as my big white shape strode through the forest floor, the small black cheetah tapping along in a faster pace. We didn't speak, a sudden air of master and subordinate lingering between us. If that was how the two wanted it, I would provide it, although it was nothing like Neshkent.

A wind drifted through the trees as we exited the forrest and stepped onto the training grounds once again. The breeze brought along Kakashi's pine like, earthy scent, urging me to halt and inhale.

"The humans are watching you." Nephthys commented dryly.

I opened my eyes and looked ahead to see Gai and Kakashi sitting under a tree along with Neshkent, who seemed content in the pre dusk gloom. Feeling somewhat self-conscious about being in this indiscreet form, I shifted out of her form and into myself again. Popping my shoulders, the black Nephthys and I walked over to the three sitting, all of them getting up to meet us halfway.

"Where's Heket?" The old tiger asked as he trudged towards us, his back seeming to ache heavily down with each step.

"Licking his wounds." Nephthys answered neutrally.

"I see. You have submitted then." Neshkent sat down tiredly, holding Nephthys gaze strongly.

"Impressive training you have going on here." Kakashi commented softly.

I was quite shocked to see him here and wondered how long he'd been joining the others. We had been at it for hours.

"You shouldn't speak unless spoken to, human." Nephthys hissed.

Well, this was surely a change of direction. I looked at her a bit puzzled, as did Kakashi and Gai.

"It's okay Nephthys, he's a friend. They all are." I said, holding her eyes until she looked away.

"You're strong." Neshkent commented, his old brown eyes looking deeply into mine.

"Well, it wasn't that bad." I responded in all modesty.

"You've got some pretty scratches across you nose." Kakashi pointed to my nose, raising an eyebrow.

In that instant I became aware of my condition. I did feel sick and was even starting to feel heated like my body was working out a sickness. Right, there was poison on those claws of theirs. How could I have forgotten that? I touched my nose taking in a sharp breath.

"Um, Toshi?"

My throat felt soar and my knees were starting to bugle. I bumped down on my knees, as a cough started to erupt. It was like there was something corroding inside of me, burning and scratching its way out.

"What's happening to her?"

I felt people around me starting to get confused and just as I was about to explain to them, I coughed up the known red liquid that was blood.

"She's suffering from Heket's poison." I heard Nephthys say.

I started coughing violently every fiber of my body shaking weakly. Gai was at my side in an instant.

"You must know the antidote." Kakashi said calmly.

"Of course, and I will give it to her in a second." Nephthys answered.

Unable to focus, Gai held me up so I didn't go face first into the grass. I coughed over and over, an eternity seeming to drag by before Kakashi held a small wet bottle up in front of me.

"Drink this!" He said and tilted my head upwards, forcing the bottle to my mouth, pouring the bile liquid down my throat.

I almost spat it out again when I continued coughing, but Kakashi kept his grip around my jaw firm. The relief in my throat was instant but my body was still trembling and overheating.

"Okay put her down." I heard Kakashi say, my eyes now closed.

Gai carefully put me down, as the antidote took its time to enter my body.

"I thought I was going to die." I breathed, only now realizing how helpless and out of control I'd been.

That was a really serious poison. How could anyone keep on going like that?

"Of course you aren't going to die!" Gai exclaimed, his voice full of emotion.

"Of course not." Came Kakashi's calm voice.

The grey haired ninja squatted down beside me and stroke my hair comfortingly once. It annoyed me somehow. Why was he showing care all of a sudden? Coming to visit me after a whole month? Who does he think he are?! Despite my angry inner thoughts I lay silently, feeling my body burn, nevertheless glad that Kakashi was by my side. Nephthys came into view.

"I'm glad you felt that. Now you know how it feels to be poisoned. Now you know our power." She said cooly before disappearing in a blur of smog. Silence passed.

"Should we take her to the hospital?" Gai asked.

I looked up at Kakashi from my position, thinking how he could look so much in control.

"No, I don't think that's necessary. Besides, she doesn't like hospitals." Kakashi answered his friend.

In that moment I was grateful that Kakashi knew me so well.

"I'm fine." I breathed, managing a small smile.

Both men looked down at me skeptically.

"I'll follow her home, Gai." Kakashi said, his brow creasing the slightest.

A passing silence was shared between the two ninjas, and I wish I could see the looks they were giving each other.

Gai finally sighed "Fine." His head popped into my view.

"I'll see you tomorrow Toshi. I hope you'll be better." Gai said and then squinted his eyes "Are you okay with Kakashi taking you home?" He added in a whisper, as if Kakashi couldn't hear.

The silver haired jounin rolled his eyes.

"It's alright." I answered hoarsely.

He nodded understandingly before Kakashi took a hold of my arm, stretched it out, and slowly lifted me up, placing my arm around his shoulder to support me.

"Can you walk like this?" He asked as I tried to regain my foothold.

I bit my lip, secretly cursing myself for enjoying the sudden concern and proximity. I tried one step to test my strength, sensing my knees buckle. But his strong arm around my waist kept me up. I glanced up at him, his eyes showing worry in that lazy facade.

"I'll see you later my youthful friends!" Gai gave us his famous smile already turning around and leaving.

"Thanks for the training." I tried to shout, but it came out hoarse and dry.

Kakashi chuckled and I shot him a look that told him to keep his thoughts to himself.

"You know, you have to relax in order for the antidote to work at its best." He said.

"Shut up. I know." I muttered.

The sky was orange and red as we made it down the streets of Konoha in a slow tempo. Walking in such close proximity with Kakashi felt odd, especially in public. Despite his past as an ANBU, the copy ninja was fairly easy recognizable and that fact went with the people - the girls especially - in Konoha. Limping along side of him, I stopped keeping count of girls giving me the looks - either confused or just downright jealous.

Somehow it didn't come as a shock to me, but it still made me wary and irritated. He was elite, well known, respected and feared - some was even starstruck in his presence. He held authority through out the city and was looked upon as a high class citizen from a great clan, supposed to marry some girl of higher birth. I didn't know much about Konoha, but I knew most ninja of higher status or birth married other ninja out of love, but society still expected them to marry other of the same status.

Then there was me, a nobody orphan with no social status other than the people I'd gotten to know. I did Konoha's dirty jobs, lurking around anonymously in the shadows, never to been seen or recognized. It was the harsh truth, but the truth nonetheless. It was what was Konoha needed of me and therefore I would play the role if it meant having a place on Kakashi's side, even if he didn't want to be much around me.

Oh' and there was the fact that Kakashi had spent years building his reputation amongst the hidden villages. I had a long way up hill in days of peace before I could ever prove myself worthy as he. Afterall he had been there along the attack of the kyuubi and participated in the great shinobi World War III. What was I? I was seven back then, barely even gave the rumors of the Kyuubi attacking the hidden leaf a thought. During the war I was two years old, learning how to speak properly...

I peeped up at Kakashi's determined expression suddenly remembering he was much older than I.

"Look we're here." He said and glanced down at me.

Having been lost in thought I looked up straight ahead and saw the herb-store. The small black haired girl Azami was playing hopscotch with her mother, who mostly seemed to be looking. The girl stopped in her tracks and looked at us dumbly in way only kids could, with mouth slightly open and eyes squinted. Azami's mother, sitting on the front steps got up, worry crossing her features before shifting to slightly startled and confused when she saw Kakashi.

I almost forgot that she was from the upper parts of Konoha. Of course she knew who Kakashi was.

"Hey." I enthused weakly.

She nodded at me, the confusion still showing in her eyes, her feeble thin arms clutching each other in a polite manner.

"Toshi was badly poisoned. I'm just going to help her inside." Kakashi said, surprising me with the sudden authority in his voice.

Azami's mother - Yoshiko - seemed to stiffen her eyes sparkling at him before she bowed, remembering her manners.

"Of course mr. Hatake." she answered feebly just as Azami came rushing up to clutch her mothers leg.

The copy ninja simply steered me inside and I sighed at the familiar scent as my body was starting to relax as well. Hana came rushing to us, worry plastered all over her face. Among Hana's calm cries of worry we made it inside the kitchen - I had to crawl through the door myself - and Kakashi steered me around the middle kitchen-counter and stopped by one of the high chairs.

I gasped suddenly, when he grabbed my waist with both hands and lifted me up in one of the chairs like I was light as a feather. The movement took me by surprise - it was almost like being a child again - and I instinctively put my hands on his shoulders to keep balanced.

"I'll just clean your scratches." He muttered, Hana started to muss around the kitchen for some cloth and sterilizing.

I didn't need Kakashi's help though. My pride couldn't take it, not after a whole month of ignoring me and then suddenly showing up into my life again. Still, I wasn't really up for a discussion right now.

"I just need some rest." I said calmly, slouching forward while Kakashi and Hana searched the large kitchen.

Azami and Yoshiko entered through the back door in that moment and the small girl came running up to us while her mother stood politely by the fireplace, watching us from a distance.

"What happened Shiro? Who's that old man?" The girl asked innocently stopping by me and peeped up at my face.

"Shiro?" Kakashi exclaimed, amusement showing in his voice.

I sighed "Don't ask."

The hyperactive girl had given me lots of nicknames ranging from man-shi to toshi-ro and now simply Shiro due to my light hair color. Kakashi stopped in his tracks and looked at the small girl dumb-founded and Azami returned the look equally curious.

"Remember your manners Azami." Yoshiko said softly, but there was a harsh edge to her tone if you knew her well enough.

The girl just crossed her arms defiantly and pouted as Kakashi blinked at her.

"He's not old, he was born with that hair color Azami." I explained with a sigh.

She huffed, blowing up her cheeks stubbornly "Well he looks old." She pointed a finger at him "Old man."

"Azami." Her mother warned but kept her distance to us. It was the first time I had heard Yoshiko ever correct her child. Apparently you had to be important like Kakashi for that to happen.

Kakashi squatted in front of the black haired girl and she sucked in a breath, suddenly being in his eye level, but kept her ground determined.

"I have grey hair because I'm enchanted so no princesses will fall in love with me." He explained a smirk evident under the mask.

He reached to the pouch in his belt and rummaged through it.

"You're miss Azami Fujimaki right?" His eyes briefly glanced at Yoshiko behind the girl.

His status considered, Kakashi probably knew the surnames of every upper class family in the city, either having been assigned to escort them or simply help out with affairs I would never know of.

"That means you're almost a princess of Konoha." He added and pulled out a small creased dandelion.

His way with the small girl surprised me beyond comparison. I always imagined Kakashi to be awkward amongst kids this age, but he knew exactly which buttons to push. Oh' and I couldn't forget his way around girls. Apparently six year old girls was no exception.

"Maybe you'll be the one to break the spell." He said, working a thick edge of charm into his voice while offering her the dandelion.

Azami's face had grown raspberry red, the girl standing stiffly on her toes, stubbornly refusing to back away. Kakashi nudged the dandelion forward and she reached silently out to take it, head tilted downwards flustered while still looking him in the eye.

"I already have a boyfriend." She said defiantly, mouth pouting even more than before.

"Oh' and who's that?" Kakashi asked, his eye curving in a smile.

"Gai-Gai." She answered now finding the guts to actually look at the creased yellow flower.

I suppressed a laugh, smacking the back of my hand subtly to my mouth. The contradiction was simply of epic proportions.

"Gai? Really?" Kakashi sounded genuinely startled.

"Yes!" Azami glanced up at me and then leaned closer to Kakashi whispering: "Because once he gave me a rose. But don't tell Shiro because she likes him too."

"She does?" Kakashi raised an eyebrow, glancing teasingly up at me. We both knew it was the misunderstanding of the year.

"Mr. old man you can give the flower to Shiro, she's a princess too." She added happily "You just can't see it because sometimes she acts like a man and carry things around."

Kakashi genuinely laughed at that and got up, taking the flower gently back from Azami.

"I'm not a princess Azami." I said and rolled my eyes.

"Yes you are!" She raised her eyebrows defiantly "You should help break mr. old man's spell. Don't you feel sorry for him?"

"It's true though. Look at her face. A princess couldn't have such scratches on her face." Kakashi commented, pointing at the scratches on my nose.

I fanned his hand away starting grow uncomfortable about the conversation.

"That's because a dragon abducted her and you saved her from it!" Azami enthused starting to grow over-enthusiastic about this story Kakashi had dragged us into. She slapped his leg defiantly.

"Give her the flower quickly so she'll fall in love you!" The girl scolded the tall elite ninja.

Ever the mind-set of children. So fantastically simple. Yet I found myself fighting a mad blush creeping its way to my cheeks, my heart starting to pick up its rhythm. Even Kakashi looked a bit awkward at the suggestion, scratching the back of his head.

"Alright then. Here, Toshi." He handed me the yellow flower and I took it reluctantly, the gesture seeming to affect me more than it should. It was cheesy as hell.

"Thanks I guess." I said peeping at the bowing head of a dying dandelion.

"Now you should kiss." The girl enthused.

Talking about feeling awkward. I couldn't even hear from blood shooting through my ears. Kakashi's lazy facade was up in the blink of an eye like what the girl had just said wasn't a big deal.

"Now, don't you think it would be better to take care of those scratches." Hana's voice came from beside me, the old lady having gathered warm water and sterilizing to get rid of the remaining poison.

Saved by the bell.

"Right." Kakashi agreed and started preparing whatever he thought needed to be done to those superficial scratches.

"It'll probably sting a bit." He said when he was ready, standing closely in front of me.

I locked my jaw stubbornly as his hand closed in on my face, his other hand gently tugging through my hair and to the side of my neck to keep me in place. Although I was still somewhat mad at him, his hand there made my body go numb, a rush of an unknown feeling ghosting up and leaving me light headed. I watched his silver ebony eye up close - and hissed.

That did sting, I thought as he dapped the cloth across the bridge of my nose, deeply focused and surprisingly gentle. There was so many shades of black and silver in his eye, it being the first time ever for me to watch this closely. In the middle his pupil was jet black and then the color turned a light grey silver with hints of blue. Further out an onyx ring encircled the colors barely turning jet black before ending... He was truly unique.

I blinked when he stopped and rummaged for something else on the table, before I looked down to see Azami admiring me. I had almost forgotten her standing there. It seemed Kakashi and I had a fan now.

"I'll just rub some drops of the antidote into the wound before covering it with some salve." He explained, this time moving closer to me - closer meaning in between my legs.

He let you go. He left you and kicked you out of his apartment as quick as garbage. The anger I was trying to fuel myself with constantly seemed to turn into frustration and desire. I would let him go this time, but some day when I was on my best, we would have an argument. No matter how hard I tried to ignore it, the fact was there and my feelings too.

His fingers traveled through my hair along the feeble skin again, this time sending chills down my spine. I watched him again. Watched how handsome he was, felt his breath on me as he dubbed antidote into the scratches.

"O' hey."

Everyone stopped their doing and looked to the small door into the shop. I turned around in my seat to see Kenshin crawling through.

Shit... I had forgotten everything about our date.

"Kenshin?" I said surprised.

An awkward silence passed as he smiled sheepishly and looked around the many people in the room before his eyes stopped at Kakashi, who stood as if frozen in place between my legs, the cloth hanging where my nose had been.

"Hello Kakashi." Kenshin said, his eyes turning more serious.

Realizing how Kakashi and I was looking, standing in such close proximity, I waved Kakashi's hand away instinctively, who by the way, gave Kenshin a curt nod in response.

"Is it already six o' clock?" I asked, promptly growing annoyed that Kakashi wasn't backing off.

"Yeah it is." He said timidly, obvious - even to Azami's mother - that he was uncomfortable about all the eyes at him.

Subtly I poked a finger in between the muscles of Kakashi's stomach, causing him to snap out of his calculating state of mind. I wondered why Kenshin was addressing Kakashi so casually, being a joinin - who knew his name but wasn't aquatinted with him - he should be addressing him like the rest of Konoha.

"Ok, I'll be right there. I just had a bad poison infused in my body, but it's wearing off already." I responded and flashed him a smile to ease the mood.

Kenshin tensed up briefly, his eyes darting to Kakashi and then to mine.

"What happened?" He asked seeming alert.

I opened my mouth to answer but was cut off by Kakashi "She's fine now. I just gave her some antidote. I carried her here after having watched her train."

Was I missing some kind of guy-code here? He didn't exactly answer Kenshin's question. But it looked like the tall dark haired ninja settled with that explanation when he visibly relaxed. The copy ninja, on the other hand, backed away fully now, and started to clean up what Hana had found for me. There was a dull ache in my chest. I felt we should be closer again. I dismissed the feeling and hopped down form the chair, still feeling nauseous. I looked over at Kenshin who seemed to be admiring me, his eyes sparkling in anticipation.

I was smacked in the head with the realization that I was going on a date. Not just a date, but I was going with someone who desired me. Me! Suddenly I felt nervous. I looked at him dressed nicely, well nicely for a ninja - meaning he didn't wear any ninja clothes.

Looking down at myself I realized I was still wearing my training outfit and had done nothing to look good for him. Well, that was what I was supposed to do, right?

"Um... I'm not quite ready yet. I mean I'm still wearing this." I tugged in my pants "And I'm all dirty."

"Well, yeah, you do look kind of gross." Kenshin pondered putting a hand to his chin.

I glared at him, already having forgotten his sarcastic sense of humor. Kakashi peeped up from a cabinet, a slight scowl evident his one eye. Hana suffocated a laugh and the old man just looked stiff.

"Shiro's a princess and she's not gross." Azami's voice cut through the awkward silence that lingered.

"I was just kidding." Kenshin said apologetically to the small girl who came stomping forward.

"Good because if you did, Shiro's boyfrie-"

I slapped my hand over the girl's mouth.

"Azami don't be rude." I smiled at Kenshin while trying to still the girl without looking too obvious.

The girl was about to make this moment much more awkward than it already was. Kenshin just looked at me perplexed, scratching the side of his hair.

"Anyways. Let's get going." I enthused, maybe putting it on a little too thick.

"Toshi, are you sure you're alright?" Kakashi asked from behind me, I looked at him over my shoulder.

There was something there in his eyes. Something that made me want to stay with him instead. I set my jaw stubbornly.

"Yeah, I'll get better on my way." I ensured him, forcing myself to enjoy this moment of my first date, even if it was hard leaving behind Kakashi as he watched me walk away with a date.

.

The date was less formal than what I had imagined it to be. Kenshin took me to a sushi restaurant and the conversation had a natural relaxed flow, although he was prone to be cheeky. Somehow I liked that, but still he wasn't Kakashi and he surely didn't act like it. Kenshin was wearing his heart on his sleeve - at times - but sometimes I took him in having a mortifyingly neutral face - an on-the-job injury I suppose.

"Are you close to Kakashi Hatake?" Came the dreaded question.

I respectfully told him I didn't want to answer and he seemed to accept that. But there were simply too much to tell if I should ever explain my relationship with Kakashi. What I was dreading the most was Kenshin's reaction to my past. Did he know about me? Surely he would have to. I had already made a reputation by breaking out of an A-ranked prison.

Of course he knew about that, but had explained that he believed that people were born good, and therefore everyone should be looked upon with new eyes. At least that was his explanation even though I couldn't help but feel that he wasn't being totally honest.

He walked me home after our dinner, being very much a - sarcastic - gentleman, hoping that my first date ever, had gone well. He didn't try anything, keeping the physical contact to a minimum as most ninja's did with people they didn't know well.

Two days after I was starting to plan my little 'visit' to the forbidden archives. I had to go locations to gather intel on different subjects, choosing how and when to strike. It was extensive, thorough work that would take a long time to plan, but at least I could still seem like I had a normal day to day life, knowing I was being watched either by Black Ops or Root.

To begin with I had to find out if such an archive existed. Unfortunately, the only person I knew, who knew anything about such an archive was Kakashi. Although I was reluctant to seek him out, I found him - thanks to Gai's suggestion - by the ninja World War III memorial. Why Gai knew he was hanging out there and I didn't was a mystery to me, as I had been around him so much. Anyways, our conversation went somewhat like this:

"Gai told me about a secret archive. That sound so cool!" I had to play this casually "He told me you could tell me more about it."

"Why do you want to know?" Kakashi retaliated, suspicion immediately showing in his eyes. Okay, there was an archive.

"I was simply curious. I thought maybe you knew who could give me access." I tried.

"The hokage can give you access, but even I am not permitted in there, unless there is something in there benefitting a mission." He stopped talking abruptly, now giving me his full attention. He'd just given away a great piece of information.

"Don't try to trick him into giving you permission." He warned.

"What? Why do you think I would do that? If there is no way to get in I'll just have to accept that. Jeez." I tossed my hair offended "You're so suspicious of me."

His eyes softened for the briefest of moments.

"Sorry. Old habit I guess." He said "You're not telling Kenshin any of this?"

I blinked at him. Never had I considered involving Kenshin in this thing. Especally not talking to him about me and Kakashi's conversations.

"Um no. Is it a secret that you can only gain access through missions?" I asked, playing dumb.

"It isn't common knowledge." He replied, raising an eyebrow.

"Well then I wont tell, although I was just curious if the opportunity was open." I explained again.

"Right." He eyed me, and I sensed he was holding information back.

"Is it buried into some kind of tomb or something?" I asked casually. Any other man and I would've made my smile alluring.

He scowled at me briefly, like it was a stupid question to ask.

"No it's in the hokage's building." He answered like it was matter of fact, only seconds after, the suspicion returning to his eyes.

"That's not very secret." I pondered.

"Well-" Kakashi sighed-"It's not a secret or forbidden archive. I guess it's like the Hokage's private archive."

"Toshi. I warn you. It's only because I know you so well I'm telling you this." He added, growing serious.

"And I'm very grateful for that. It probably makes you feel good that you're the only one who knows me so well. But I'm not up to anything, just basic cu-"

"Curiosity." He finished my sentence. "I know."

Then he looked at me in a strange way. Like I was a puzzle to figure out. I should've known he didn't buy the curious-idea.

"Anyways. That was all I wanted to know." I said curtly and looked into the sky to tell the time.

"How're your scratches?" He asked suddenly.

"Oh, they're fine. You can still se them across my nose." I said and smiled sheepishly.

He was silent, seeming to chew on some words, but then decided against them.

"Good." He simply answered, eyes lingering on me. I had to look away from his watchful gaze, suddenly becoming self-conscious.

"Well, I'll see you some other day." I said and started walking away, giving him a wave.

"Yeah, I'll see you around." He responded.

That had been our conversation. Short indeed, but I didn't really know what else to do around him anymore.

Kenshin took me out a few times more before he took 'things' to the next level and dared to put an arm around me. I didn't mind much, I was somewhat attracted to him - he was a good looking guy and he knew how to communicate with me without becoming cheesy. Compared to my short time with Hayate in the land of ice and his - if I put it mildly - direct way of just kissing me, Shin was much more considerate and was much more aware of physical contact. He didn't strike me as a submissive kind of guy though. I was starting to suspect that he one day would go all in with his feelings for me. I wasn't quite sure what I liked most.

.

"To your left, to your left!" Lee pointed as if it would make a difference.

"No, you're facing the wrong way!" He screamed.

A fist landed a teasing blow on my shoulder.

"Quick, to your left!" Lee screamed "No! The other left!"

"Would you shut up!" I retaliated and tore the bandage off my eyes.

Gai planted a foot in my stomach, satisfied watching me buckle over as I hadn't been prepared for the impact.

"Don't let your guard down. If you can't ignore Lee, you aren't focused enough."

"Sorry miss Toshi!" Lee called from the sidelines.

"Jeez." I huffed irritated.

For some reason I had a hard time focusing this day. Ever since my date with Kenshin a week ago I hadn't been able to get Kakashi out of my mind. I felt like I was betraying my own feelings by going on a date with someone I knew would never attract me like Kakashi did. Yet, attraction and anger kept mixing up inside my mind by the thoughts of the grey haired ninja. He kept swooping into my thoughts, his hair, his eyes, his mouth...

Not those thoughts. I looked into the sky, taking in a deep breath to empty my mind. His behavior this past month was messing with my mind. He kept a distance, tried to push me away, yet he was starting to approach me again. What was wrong with him? Couldn't he just make up his mind? It would certainly make my life a lot easier if he would stop playing all those games.

Great now I was thinking about him again.

"Ready for another round?" Gai planted a large hand on my shoulder and squeezed it in a friendly manner.

"Always." I replied, catching the concern in his eyes.

A pang of guilt hit me. Gai had no clue about what I was planning. Kakashi on the other hand was sharp so I had to watch my words around him. And then he did that thing with helping me when I was poisoned, showing care, but not telling me why he threw me out of his apartment an ignored me for a month!

I tipped my nose upwards and sniffed the air... Speaking of the devil.

"Hey you guys."

I didn't need to turn to see Kakashi coming, but glanced sideways as he came up to our little training session.

"Kakashi?" Gai enthused, a smug grin showing on his face.

"Hey." I greeted neutrally and gave him a nod, folding my hands under my chest.

"Hey Toshi." He replied looking somewhat stoic.

A-nd the tension was back tenfold. Kakashi's eyes travelled down to my bare stomach, promptly making me remember I was wearing the navy blue sports bra, the standard kunoichi training gear.

"You've grown some serious abs Toshi." He commented, not able to hide the surprise in his voice.

Unfolding my arms I looked down at my stomach. It wasn't anything to brag about, I wasn't ripped in any kind of way but, yeah, I guess a six pack was starting to show under the soft skin.

"That's what happens when you train with Gai." I answered casually, trying to hide the fact that I was about to blush at his observation.

"Well said Toshi!" Gai crossed his arms and nodded satisfied "Hard work and healthy food is the way to become a stronger ninja."

"It suits you." Kakashi said softly and stuffed his hands deeper into his pockets.

"I'm not sure if I should thank you for ogling me." I said, squinting my eyes at him, to hide my own insecurity about his compliment of my body.

He huffed "Like I would ever ogle you."

I glared at him, as he glared teasingly back, even Gai seeming to pick up on the tension.

"Anyways. Guys, let's continue our spar." The black haired ninja suggested and laughed nervously.

"Fine with me." I scoffed and looked away from Kakashi, not able to hold his gaze for any longer.

"Right. Lee and Toshi you'll team up, Kakashi and I will do the same."

"I was just passing by to see what you guys were doing. I gave the kids the day off." Kakashi explained and ran a hand through his silver hair.

"Nonsense Kakashi, are you going to decline a spar?! It'll be purely taijutsu, no ninjutsu or genjutsu allowed." Gai tried to convince the sharingan user.

"Don't bother Gai. Kakashi's too lazy for any real training. Probably why he gave the kids a day off." I said wryly.

The condescending edge to my voice seemed to spark the respected elite ninja, his eyes flaring for the briefest of moments.

"I'm not lazy. I gave them the day off because they all were on edge yesterday and needed a day off." He commented, his posture seeming to stiffen more.

Gai's expression was priceless with mouth slightly agape and narrowed eyes, like he had no clue about what was going on. It was a bit uncharacteristic for Kakashi to explain himself.

"Then why're you declining Gai?" I answered just as wryly as before.

"I'm not declining. Maybe if you would let me finish speaking you could've heard my answer. You're as impatient as always." His tone was so neutrally condescending that I momentarily couldn't hear anything for the blood shooting through my head.

"Good then. Come Lee." I answered icily.

This was so odd. Kakashi had always been good at affecting me, but now we seemed equally good at affecting each other. In the past, nothing I said could get to him, but now... well, things between us seemed so off. If anyone had told me two months ago that there would be tension between me and Kakashi - tension from both sides - I would've laughed at that person. Now it just seemed surrealistic. My image of past Kakashi versus present Kakashi was completely different. Understanding the depths of him only seemed to have made him more tantalizing.

Sighing I took a stance before the eager younger version of Gai. It was ever so hard to fight Kakashi, but my pride couldn't take much more. If not for my pride, he could just keep on ignoring me and then just pick up things where they left off. Someone really had to put him in his place and teach him some manners. Still, even if I wanted to yell at him, all his memories kept washing in to my mind, reminding me why he was so cautious about friendships. This was an endless contradiction and sooner or later one of us was going to back off or go in head first.

Lee lashed for me, forcing me to focus on the fight ahead. The kid was faster than me, but always adjusted his speed to mine, keeping me constantly on the limit of me speed, working it slowly and gradually upwards.

Kakashi's POV.

Gai was forcing him to maintain focus, and he took every little opportunity he could to glance at Toshi who was fighting gracefully with Lee. The sight of her in a sports bra, exposed stomach and marked arms and shoulders, open gloves on her hand, and the rare sight of her bare neck, her blonde hair set in a high ponytail and the pearl glistening in the sunlight. She was - to put it mildly- extremely enthralling. But there was still unsolved issues between them and he knew he had created them himself.

It would stay that way if it was up to him though. If that could keep her slightly more at bay, then so be it. Every time he was around her, he opened involuntary up a little bit more at a time, and that was exactly what he was trying to avoid. Yet, why did he find himself here? Every time they met the tension grew a tad, even Toshi seemed to not be able to hide her actual state of mind anymore.

He stopped and threw off his navy blue shirt, leaving him in the combo top-and-mask he wore underneath. It was too damned hot outside to train in a shirt. He lashed for Gai, using a Kunai instead of fists and the two friends engaged in a high speed battle. Gai had through the years grown into a strong shinobi. He wasn't the same weak boy Kakashi remembered him as, when he had first met him outside the academy, the time Kakashi's father still lived. The thought brought forth a strange feeling and the silver haired ninja grew a tad more serious, keeping his spar partner on his toes.

Before he knew of it, the shrill ringing of the timer sounded. Half an hour had passed by in the blink of an eye. Kakashi found himself trying to avoid looking at her. Everything he did around her seemed to him a sign of weakness and it took him aback every time he thought about it. Couldn't he just act natural? He never thought this much about his behavior around another person that wasn't his enemy. Crossing his arms in thought, he felt confused about his own behavior. The genius ninja simply couldn't figure out why his thoughts was so led astray by her.

Sweat was glistening off of her collarbones and further down he could spot the beginning of her tan cleavage before it disappeared into her sports bra. He diverted his gaze and closed his sharingan. Too damned observant sometimes. They all met in the middle of the field, Toshi still seeming defiant and nonchalant.

"Let's take another round!" Gai enthused.

Kakashi's body reacted by sending a strange surge of emotions up through his stomach. He and Toshi hadn't sparred much due to the issues with her back in the past. But now, she was at her outmost best, although Lee might've taken some of the heat off. But he was still somewhat excited to match her taijutsu with his, now when she wasn't able to use Eien or anything else. Still... He wasn't sure if she could control her temper. It would be a good opportunity to test her self control though. The copy ninja was confident in his skills against her, but didn't want to get in the way of her wrath. He was getting a vibe from her that he had to tread carefully.

"Toshi and Kakashi, you'll go and I'll spar with my young student here." Gai said giving the group a thumbs up, the sun glistening off of his teeth.

"I'm not sure Gai. I just came here to say hello." Kakashi said, scratching his hair.

Toshi huffed "What? Scared to fight me Kakashi?"

"Very scared." He said casually, his tone giving away that he didn't mean it one bit.

The blonde's eyes flared, her posture stiffening. If she could hiss like a cat, she would've done it now.

"You can take one more round my youthful friend." Gai enthused and gave Kakashi an encouraging - at least that was what it was supposed to be - clap on the back.

"Fine." The copy ninja muttered reluctantly. He had a bad feeling that this spar would be more than just a spar.

Toshi's POV.

My heart was throbbing quickly in anticipation to this spar. Kakashi and I had never really sparred much and now was a perfect opportunity to let some of my aggressions off on him. Eien's instinct overwhelmed me for a second and it didn't go unnoticed by the grey haired ninja who was prone to be overly observant. I took in a deep breath as Gai and Lee left us and spread my legs apart into a strong stance and pulled out a kunai. The copy ninja did the same, but firstly pulled his headband over his red sharingan.

"You're offending me." I said cheekily and smirked

He laughed softly "Yeah well, lets see if you can keep up with me this way. I might even let you touch me."

By kami he knew which buttons to push. Crouching I readied myself. A wind blew across the field. My energy was building. A bird sang somewhere in the distance. Kakashi looked casual, even slightly glad in his stance. Somehow it annoyed me.

I launched forward slightly to the right and sliced at him. He blocked, the small blades ringing at the clash. Kunai's clashed and clashed and clashed together, Kakashi taking the defense while I was on the offense. He didn't slice back even once, but spun a few kicks at me as we danced in a battle of death, attacking and blocking. I picked up my speed, starting to grow frustrated at his evasive tactic. Not even getting one single hit was just irritating beyond comparison.

A kunai came in from the left, surprising me slightly. I blocked wrist to wrist and slid my hand over his arm and grabbed it, twisting his arm as I pulled and immense amount of chakra in to my foot to launch a front kick right for solar plexus. Quick as he was, a kunai came in from the right before I could kick him, his other arm twisting mine out if my grasp. I dodged, cursing myself for not picking up my speed as he created some distance between us.

Crouching slightly in silence I took him in. His hard muscles showing underneath the tight top he was wearing. His navel and the round outlines of his six-pack. The well build chest - the biggest muscles on the upper body and its almost square male curves. He lifted the headband up again and closed his onyx eye, revealing the blood red eye. For a moment I was entranced by his whole being, but remembered how easily he could humiliate me.

"I was wondering when you were going to get serious." I shouted and smirked, although the smirk was only an overconfident facade compensating for my inner aggressions and worries.

"I'm still wondering when you're going to be." He called back.

In that moment he made me realize that in order to get somewhere with this spar I'd have to use my head instead of relying on my instincts, build through many years. Kakashi was everything. Strong, fast, stealthy, intelligent. His nose, eyes and hearing was even better than anyone I knew. So should I use stealth or brute force against him?

I would definitely gain an advantage taking the spar into the forest, but even there his sharingan worked miracles. I'd have to be more stealthy than ever. The decision was made in a heartbeat. Throwing shurikens at him as a distraction I leapt to the forest in a blur. He followed me quickly and for a moment I felt like I was being chased by a hungry wolf.

But I soon found cover and before I knew of it we engaged in a highly alert sparring match. He was good at concealing his chakra just as I, but he easily found me if I was too near, thanks to his red eye. Fifteen minutes of a deadly hide and seek went by in the blink of an eye, until I finally caught him from a blind ankle. The sound of him landing on the ground, his feet swept away from under him was ecstatically satisfying. I smirked, but his grin - obvious even under the mask - made it clear that I'd only succeeded because he let me. A bubbling anger grew in me before he spun from the ground, trying to take me down with him. In my burst of anger I jumped away, every fiber of my being wanting to punch him through a wall. Forcing my speed to a maximum I threw three shuriken at him, one of them missing by an inch, or so I thought.

Suddenly still, he took a hand to his ear and back, red liquid spread across the tip of his fingers. For some reason, a surge of fear hit me. He looked back at me, seeming surprised, but then his eyes turned mortifyingly cold.

"Fine. You want to see me serious?" He said calmly.

A murders intent.

The feeling ebbed out of him like a black cloud and I withdrew all my chakra to get away from that feel. He wasn't serious before... But now he was. The last time I'd seen him like that was when I first came to Konoha. I shivered involuntary at the thought of those scars on my back, as I pictured the memory of child Kakashi, cold bloodedly assassinating anyone who got in his way.

He's not like that anymore. Remember that.

I braced myself in front of him, the whole forest seeming to stand still. Finally I got what I wanted, but I should have been careful of what I wish for. I stared into his scowling red eye, never wavering, never blinking once. I had to keep everything at a maximum now, without turning into lion form.

In the blink of an eye he was at me, his incredible speed taking me off guard. I blocked, but his incoming hand swept right past my arm, grabbing my throat in such a predatory manner that I hitched at the impact.

A kunai fell soundlessly into the grass as I grasped his arm and he strode forward, pushing me in front of him, until a tree stopped us. My hands fumbled at his arm, as I stared into that one red eye, no emotions evident inside. His grip tightened and my lungs burned for air. This was all too familiar, bringing back memories of that day in front of Konoha gates a long time ago. He couldn't win like this. It was too easy. I'd trained so much! This couldn't be it!

'The body must obey the mind' a voice in my head said.

'But your mind is consumed with fear. How can the body help?" Eien's voice whispered distantly.

She was right though. The bad memories couldn't stop me now. Anger rose in me again. The violence in his heart was so deeply rooted into his being that I had to remind myself this wasn't anything personal. Yet his eyes flickered at me, his resolve seeming to waver with each passing second. I took that opportunity and smashed an elbow into the joint of his upper- and lower arm, forcing him to break his grasp around my throat. Using every ounce I could of Eien's chakra I landed a front kick in his stomach forcing him to slide through the forrest ground. He lifted his arms defensively at the harsh wind that suddenly found a path through the trees. Instinctively I lifted my hands to form the ox seal:

"No ninjutsu." Kakashi responded neutrally, leaping at me in that same instant, not wasting a single second.

We fought a battle - it would be wrong to call it a spar anymore - on a high level. I literally felt I was giving my all without really giving my all as I had to stick to the rules of no ninjutsu or genjutsu. My spars with Gai and Lee had never gone to such an extent as with Kakashi, and as we danced throughout the trees there was absolutely no room for any wrong steps. I'd almost forgotten how skilled Kakashi actually was. No doubt most ninjas held him in such a high regard. I could barely keep up with him.

Then again, I had triggered something in him, forcing him to take this spar seriously. I wondered if he ever took any spars as serious, cause his sparring partners would be unfortunate souls. No - his enemies would be unfortunate souls. I dodged a kunai slashing continuously and strategically at me, thinking that I had once been one of his enemies.

The thought sent a chill through me and distracted me for a second. The grey haired ninja took the small opening in his hands and swiped my feet away from under me. Heavily I landed on my back with a hard thud, but took advantage of my position in an instant and kicked for his legs which he easily jumped over.

My head rang from the impact, leaving me slightly dizzy but there was no time to waste. I rushed up, anger flaring in me. I wanted to land at least one punch at him! I wanted to slap his cheek and yell at him. I wanted him to comfort me and hug me. I wanted him, his thoughts, his memories. I wanted him to share it all and confide in me so I could reconcile the violence in him. The good the bad, I could carry it all.

In seconds we reached the training grounds once again, hacking and slicing at each other. I growled in exhaustion from every single launch, my muscles aching badly. Kakashi only grunted now and then as he collided with my brute force.

"You two the time is up." Gai called from across the field.

But none of us payed any attention and continued our dance. I had to end the spar soon, as long as Kakashi was still taking me seriously or else I would soon be in no control of transforming, being this high on adrenalin.

"You're so infuriating!" I growled, startling myself by speaking at all.

"Really? Enlighten me." He answered effortlessly.

I just gritted my teeth, trying to sweep him off his feet as he left an opening. He treaded backwards before striding forward in a distance that was in such a close proximity I could barely get any force behind my slicing. His whole warm presence was oppressive and we mirrored each other's movements, taking each other's free arm while barely stopping each kunai at each other's throat.

Startled and with a kunai pressed against my throat I exhaled harshly, seeing my own kunai lingering at the delicate skin at his throat. He looked down at me with a stubborn frown, breathing just as exhausted as me. Sweat was glistening off of his arms, his navy blue top soaked. We both stood in anticipation, breathing at each other while his warmth rolled onto me like waves. The wind seemed to breath with me, rising and falling with exhale and inhale. Even Kakashi - who'd been emotionless up until now - seemed to glow with a sudden tension.

This wasn't over yet though. In a last resort both kunai's were dropped and we were entangled in close combat, trying to win with weight. I lunged my shoulder into his stomach, lifting him off of his feet and fell into the grass with him and tried to execute a choke hold. I crossed my legs over his body as though I was lying cross-legged and hooked my arms under his chin to pull his head down until his throat was against my shin.

"You can't just come back into my life after month of ignoring me!" I growled.

But Kakashi broke my guard elbowing me in the ribs, and threw me off to side before wrapping his arms around my left leg. Using his own body weight as leverage, he fell backward with both his arms and legs around my isolated leg. To increase the torque - and pain - he pulled down on my toes, hyperextending my knee. I cried out in pain, managing to kick him in the stomach, forcing him to release his hold.

"You kick me out of your apartment and now you come back like everything is fine!"

I was on him in seconds and he grabbed my arms as I was about to take him in a choke hold before he rolled on top, his eyes growing serious. I wrapped my legs around his waist in a guard, grabbing his wrist, opening my guard again and rotated to the side from under him. Then I reached over his arm that was being held by pushing my knee to his elbow, grabbed my own wrist and started pushing his arm away from his body, moving it toward my head. The lock hyper rotated his shoulder and he gritted his teeth beneath the mask, fighting against the eventual pop that would follow this move. He rotated out of my guard forcing his knee into my bladder.

Kakashi's POV.

Note to self, Toshi's really good at floor fighthing, he thought to himself.

"What's wrong with you? Why can't you make up your mind?!" She hissed at him.

He was getting the scold of his life at the moment, and to be honest it had taken him slightly by surprise. He didn't think she had the guts to address his behavior the past month. Her words struck him deeply although he didn't show it. He was growing just as frustrated and irritated as she was, and he didn't like it one bit.

He had thought this over so many times now and still didn't know quite how to explain it to her. What was wrong with him? Why couldn't he make up his mind? Pushing the pretty blonde down with all his weight, he caught her neck in a triangle choke.

"I can't believe I'm the one who have to tell this to you!" She spat.

He was along side her head, her chin brushing against his as her body twitched to get free from under him. But she had a point. Did he really need someone as damaged as her to tell this to him? No, he had thought about it a lot of times, but it seemed she had too. Her thought patterns were fairly close to his own. The two did have a connection, his dreams about her told that much. But how could she ask the exact same questions as he? Did she really know him that well?

"Make up your mind Kakashi! Why me? Why don't you push Gai away or anyone else?! Do you care or not?! Stop messing with my head! " Her voice was starting to take on a note of sadness.

He tightened his grip around her neck, cutting off the blood circulation to make her submit.

"I have a lot of reasons to push you away." He admitted, hating the feeling that came with choking her. He closed his eyes, trying futilely to ignore her apple scent.

She squirmed in a last try to get free. He couldn't hold on for long, for some reason it almost made him sick to do this to her. Please submit, he thought as he felt her struggling becoming weaker and weaker. The wind lay deadly still around them, indicating that she wasn't breathing. Finally she tabbed the ground and he released his hold immediately.

She inhaled sharply, as he lifted himself up in his arms to look down at her. The beautiful green eyes were unfocused for a few seconds while she saw stars, before they focused on his hovering figure.

"Why don't you tell me those reasons?! Do you know how much it hurt me that you just left my life like that?!" She said bravely although her voice was becoming high.

He closed his sharingan and opened his normal eye, her words genuinely stirring some emotions inside him. His eyebrows creased as he chewed her words, while he - how wrong it may seem in the situation - took in her rising flat stomach, her shiny hair sprayed across the green grass, flushed cheeks and that neck he just wanted to dart into...

He was taken aback by his own thoughts and blinked dumbly down at her. It was so inappropriate considering the tears starting to form in her emerald eyes.

"Because I... " Kakashi Hatake was for once lost for words.

He obviously cared about her. He wanted to protect her badly, he knew that much. So why was he hiding it? He knew why; to convince himself that it was ok to loose her when that day came. But why couldn't he tell her that?

She slapped his chest weakly her eyes blazing with emotions. He brushed a strand of loose hair away from her forehead in response, causing her to hitch. Seeing her lie there helpless under him, asking so much of him at the same time... He looked away sensing the desire building between them.

She's only nineteen for crying out loud. Stop thinking like that. His thoughts were running on a completely wild track. He rolled off of her and lay beside her to look into the sky, sighing deeply.

Toshi's POV.

So so So SO strange. That crazy surge of emotion running through me as his finger had brushed my forehead. How could such a simple gesture make me go blank like that? No it wasn't just the gesture. It was his whole body pressed down on me, his rising strong chest and those strong shoulders and arms on each side of my head, standing all predatory. His grey hair and his worried eyes. I wanted to attack him in a kiss right then and there.

Wait, I was mad at him! And how long had I been staring into the sky? I tilted my head to look at him fully, lying beside me in the short grass, wind caressing his silver hair. He was looking at the skies too, deep in thought.

"Well?" I tried, hoping to get him to talk for once, the angry edge forgotten.

He tilted his head to look at me too. He was so close I could feel his breathing through the mask. None of us looked away or wavered.

"I'm sorry... " He said softly "of course I care. I just..." His eyes flickered as his eyebrows creased again.

I bit my lip to hold back the tears that threatened to come out. I liked him vulnerable and at the same time it made me feel his struggling, remembering his worst memories.

"I just don't like that you know me so well. It makes me feel easy to read, I shouldn't be that. Not even Gai guesses my emotions as well as you do." He turned his head to the skies again.

"Your future is still so unsure. You know how many people I cared about I've lost in the past. I feel that possibility is lingering by your side constantly. You're very independent and don't go well with authorities, so chances that you will leave Konoha or choose another path are very high. The more educated you are, the closer you'll get to making the right choices for you. If I become too attached to you, I'll just, you know, end up loosing another friend I cared about."

That was a whole lot of Kakashi in one sentence! Had he ever considered that he was one of the biggest reasons for me to stay in Konoha?

"Wow... That was deep." I muttered startled.

"But Kakashi, as long as you're here I won't leave Konoha. I don't think I could ever do that to you." I added.

"You don't have to comfort me. You should do what you want to, not stay here because of a shinobi who dragged you away and ripped your back open in wounds and almost choked you to death." He snapped.

Was he feeling guilty? Unworthy of my care?

"I decide who I want to be around or not. And as much as I hate to admit it, you're the one person I like most to be around. If you want me in your life with all my 'knowledge' of you then I'll be there. If not, then please say so. Make up your god damned mind and just do what you want to do. Stop worrying so much about something that could happen and has happened." I retorted.

He closed his eyes as a faint breeze swept by and stirred the grasses.

"Again, I can't believe I'm the one telling you this! You're supposed to be smart, but apparently you're not very insightful." I added and looked up at the clouds like he.

He sighed defeated, his gazing eyes turning soft "You're right. I'm sorry I've been so difficult." He said softly.

I turned around on my stomach and popped myself up on my elbows to catch his dim grey eye.

"Will you promise not to play games anymore? It makes me exhausted." I asked.

He looked at me like I was asking a lot of him - maybe a normal person would've just thought he looked indifferent - but I could see the emotion in his eye as I looked down at him; promises meant a lot to him. I waited for his answer while a breeze waved a few strands of golden hair in his direction, sweeping feather lightly over the bridge of his nose an eyes. He closed his eye enjoying the tickling sensation. It was hard not to marvel at him, the sight being one of the rare kind. He looked peaceful.

"Alright, I promise." He said softly and looked at me again.

"Pinky swear?" I smirked putting forth my pinky.

The elite ninja looked reluctant to swear in such a childish manner, but with a sigh seemed to relent. Our pinkies hooked.

"Pinky swear." He muttered and tugged a bit.

"Good." I answered with a grin and plopped down on my back.

It didn't take much from him to make me forget all the bad feelings I held. Maybe because he'd never promised me anything before.

"I need shade." I muttered and put my hand up in front of my eyes.

"Me too. I'm baking after this spar." He answered lazily, but in a second got up from his position, not in the least impressing me with his strong stomach.

He held out his hand towards me and for a moment I marveled at the picture of the summer version of the copy ninja. Standing in a tight navy blue top, arms bare, silver hair swaying gently in the breeze and with the blue sky behind him, I had to squint my eyes to see him in the sun. He looked like a saint. But I knew very well he wasn't.

I took his offered hand before he simply pulled me up. He looked down at me with that thoughtful expression that almost seemed tortured sometimes, holding my hand only a second too long. His eyes flickered away and around the training grounds as he hooked a finger under the fabric of his mask.

"Too hot to wear this right now." He said and tugged down the mask to reveal his gorgeous bare face.

I looked at him, still not used to seeing him like that. He smirked cheekily at me, one corner of his mouth pulled more up than the other, gum slightly showing amongst a set of straight teeth. Damn... Just damn. He knew very well what he did to me when he showed his face.

"That tree over there provides some good shade." I said, trying to redirect both our attention.

He dropped the smirk and nodded but simply followed me to the tree where I bumped down under the umbrella of leaves and branches. He followed suit and lay down beside me, arms folded under his head with a satisfied sigh.

"Gai left." I commented, although I'd sensed that a long time ago.

"True." Kakashi responded calmly.

Gai wasn't known for his understanding of situation, but sometimes he still surprised me, picking up on things that I tried to hide well from him. Of course, this escapade between Kakashi and I had been obvious.

I rolled around on to my stomach feeling the dabbled shadows of the tree across every inch of my skin.

"My body hurts from over-exertion. I'm going to get some good bruises, especially here." I pointed to my throat where he had choked me in the forest.

He stiffened a little at that, his eyes flickering to me.

"Don't be so tense. I had it coming, although I must admit you scare me sometimes when you go ANBU-mode." I muttered, stroking my throat to feel the soreness. "What happens in you when you do that anyway?"

He contemplated on that one, his eye unfocused as he looked up at the branches.

"It's just what I do to survive. Normally spars are for learning purposes and you're meant to match each other's level. But you just wanted to fight I realized. So I just thought of you as an enemy so you would stop measuring our strength." He explained.

"It's kind of scary you can just switch like that." I said. He looked at me without moving his head.

"You're doing the same when Eien's chakra gets too much for you to handle." He retaliated.

"... Guess you're right about that. Although, you're doing it purposely while I just can't control it." I said.

It made me wonder - if he was ever ordered to - could he then kill me without hesitation?

"Don't look at me like that." He said without even looking at me "It isn't easy to hurt anybody I don't want to hurt, no matter how emotionless I seem."

I looked away from him, realizing my worry had been showing.

"Right. I know that." I admitted feeling guilty I had even doubted him for a second.

I looked at the smooth skin of his neck, just above his hairline and then to his ear. The blood there was dried, the cut seeming deeper than it actually was. I reached out instinctively to touch the rim of his earlobe softly;

"How's your ear?"

He raised an eyebrow like he had forgotten, his arm twitching instinctively to reach up to the place I was touching, but for some reason he stopped himself.

"It's only superficial." He responded.

"Sorry." I said and smirked seeing the goosebumps forming along his neck.

Even Kakashi Hatake who could be as emotionless as a stone, couldn't fight goosebumps. Either he liked the touch or he was utterly disgusted by it.

"You shouldn't say sorry after a spar." He said, laying completely still as my hand traveled down to the soft shell of his ear.

"Why?" I asked.

"Because taking a beating is what you sign up for when sparring." He muttered and gulped.

This was interesting, seeing him give away those small signs of his actual state of mind. I removed my hand thinking that was enough experimenting for a day. Not like I had the guts to do anything else anyway. At his last words his eyes travelled to my bare back, his eyebrows creasing ever so little.

He sat up, resting his arms on his knees, his eye seeming to scan my back. I looked over my shoulder thinking that maybe a spider was crawling there, but realized it was the scars he was looking at.

"In return I should apologize for those scars." He said softly, a flicker of pain crossing his features.

"I thought we already had this talk." I responded, really not getting why he was so upset by those scars.

He ran a hand through his silver hair before his hand ghosted over the sensitive skin on my back. Now it was my turn to fight he goosebumps. This reminded me too much of the times in the hot-springs. Now thinking about it, he always checked up on those particular scars when we were there.

"I can't express it enough times. I scarred your skin and carried your bloody body through the city." One of his fingers traced a scar "If I had known how you are now back then, I would've never treated you like that."

He slid his hand back slowly, fingertips grazing my side. When his fingers lifted, I felt an ache in my chest. I turned around to hide my scars and popped up on my elbows. Now his eyes rested at my stomach.

"Thanks." I answered in reference to his last sentence "I already told you it was a good wake up call though."

We were both silent for a moment, listening to the sounds of wind and trees.

"I'm not Rin. I'm not Obito. I'm not anyone of your past friends. But I am Toshi and I would've never been the Toshi I am today without your help. So stop blaming yourself for something as insignificant as scars. Your list of accomplishment with me are a lot larger than the list of mistakes." I snapped watching the contours of muscle in his back.

"The mistakes weighs heavier than the accomplishments." He retaliated.

By kami he was being annoying and downright depressing.

"Come on Kakashi, do I really need to pep-talk you? You know that isn't true!" I said, trying to hold back on the snapping.

He was silent so I sat up with a sigh, trying to catch his eyes. He was resting his chin on his knees a distant look crossing his eyes.

"You carry too much guilt Kakashi. Let it go. At least your guilt concerning me." I said softly.

He rubbed his face in a frustrated manner and glanced at me.

"I hate that you're right. I hate you know me so well." He grumbled.

I chuckled at that, and brushed my hair backwards before he looked at me fully, his head still resting on his knees.

"Who would've thought that you of all people, would be the one to tell me such things."

His eyes lingered warmly and suddenly the moment was intimate again. I didn't know what to with myself, didn't know how to act. So I shrugged and looked away.

"That's what you get by investing so much time in another person. The kids are probably going to know you well when they grow older as well." I answered.

Kakashi agreed and we stayed and watched the fields in silence, the clouds moving slowly by like giant godlike beings in a light blue sky.

"It's going to rain." Kakashi said, breaking the silence.

He sniffed the air discreetly while I realized I'd been so caught up in sharing this tranquil moment with him, that I had failed to notice the change in air.

"You're right." I agreed.

We stood up and started walking. A large darker cloud had snuck up Konoha and was making its way to us. On an instinct we started jogging and soon the rain came crashing down, the last heavy tropic summer rain, probably, to hit Konoha before autumn was kicking in for real. I cursed at first, but soon found the sensation joyful, everything around us changing. Smell, surface, humidity... Kakashi's hair was drooping down in front of his eyes, a slightly amused look evident in his eye. I laughed at him, our pace picking up to find shelter. My lungs were burning, my muscles aching, the fierce pleasure of a flat out sprint.

We came tumbling under the awning of the first cafe that came into view. People sitting by the tables inside looked at us strangely as I saw my reflection in the glass. Luckily I wasn't wearing anything white, but my hair - set in a ponytail - was clinging to my back and right chin. Not paying any attention to the customers inside I looked at Kakashi who looked like a wet dog who just got out of the shower, arms spread apart, slouching and being the outmost uncomfortable.

A laugh bubbled in my stomach before it exploded. I'd never seem him look so uncomfortable and pathetic in my life. His hair was flat - well almost - and his navy blue pants clung to his legs and... Kakashi's behind was definitely well shaped.

He looked at me perplexed, over my sudden silence. Then he started chuckling softly and his laughter - infectious - made me start to laugh again.

"I know that look Toshi! You should see yourself." He said, his naturally low and slightly monotone voice still in effect though he was laughing.

"Psh, I'm not as pathetic looking as you." I retaliated jokingly.

"Mind your tongue." He responded raising an eyebrow teasingly at me. "Oh I forgot. You're only nineteen." He added

The older ninja pushed my shoulder hard and I stumbled sideways, not anticipating such a hard shove.

"What was that for?" I asked, still playing along on whatever this was.

"Something you deserved." he answered.

For a second I looked at him amused. It was rare seeing Kakashi being playful or even joke - at least being downright genuine about it.

I shoved him back, almost pushing him into the rain. He seemed surprised by the equally harsh push and suddenly we were fighting to get the other out in the rain. With one arm around his back, and his around mine, the wet sand beneath our feet seemed to deepen as our stubborn feet plunged into the ground. I couldn't help but laugh. Two ninjas playing a child's game in front of a lot of people. Speaking of:

"Excuse me. Would you please stop, you're scaring our costumers." a timid voice spoke from behind us.

We both froze, my back pressed hard against Kakashi's front as he had tried to push me into the rain. I almost fell when he straightened up before we awkwardly apologized. She allowed us to stay until the rain stopped. Kakashi sat down at the only chair standing outside, elbows on his knees. I felt like the space between us should be smaller.

"If I sit down, dirt are going to cling to me pants." I commented absentmindedly.

His eyes wondered lazily to mine as he tilted his head. I could almost see the wheels turning in his head as he thought of his next words. He leaned back exhausted and put his hands on his thighs.

"If you want a lap it's yours." He said laying it on casually although I knew it was big deal... For both of us.

I blinked at him surprised while I fought to keep my heart rate normal. I'd even slept in his arms, and yet I felt myself over-heating.

"Um... Sure." I said, trying to act as casual as he did. He sensed my confusion and smiled cheekily. That only made me more willing to do it.

It wasn't as tense as I had thought. When I sat down on his right thigh, he scooped an arm around to lean on the armrest, while I put my arm 'casually' on his shoulder. The closeness was overwhelming at first, feeling him through such thin layers of clothes against my back. But as his warmth seeped into me, we both started to relax. He rested the side of his head lightly against my hand by his cheek. I felt his hair tickle my shoulder, feeling like he should put and arm around me. This was nice. I wondered if this was normal for him. It wasn't my impression though. So many things changed in one day.

A deep rumbling thunder echoed from somewhere in the distance, yet birds was still singing. We sat in sudden forced silence, listening to the sound of drooping rain. There was something tranquil about the moment, like there finally was this unspoken acceptance between us. The rain stopped.

"I forgot my shirt." I thought out loud.

"... Me too." He answered softly, seeming genuinely relaxed and in deep thought.

Something inside me stirred. I'd almost forgotten that I was supposed to prepare for my investigation on the forbidden archives. I glanced at Kakashi and bit my lip, torn between spending the rest if my day with him or do what I was supposed to. But the rain had stopped. It was time to move on. No more excuses to be sitting on his lap.

"I think I'll pick it up later. I have some things I promised myself to do today." I admitted, not entirely telling him a lie.

"Oh..." He looked a bit surprised and tilted his head up "Of course."

He scratched the back of his head seeming embarrassed about something. I raised an eyebrow at him. Although we had just had a major breakthrough in sharing feelings, I still didn't expect much change in him. But here it was, that little change I caught him show a few times after our fight.

I got up, suddenly feeling cold by being away from him. The grey haired ninja got up too, dusting off his pants on instinct.

"I'll pick up your shirt. Don't worry about it." He said eyes turning soft in that odd way they did when we were in Suna.

"Thank you!" I enthused and bit my lip, I didn't want to sound too happy, although everything inside me was bubbling in butterflies and longing to be with him.

"Thanks for a good spar." He said our proximity suddenly seeming closer than normal.

"You too. And it was nice to finally spill the beans." I admitted, tucking some of my damp hair behind my ear.

"Yeah." His eyes turned indifferent again "You're right."

There was so many things he didn't say in that moment, I could sense that. He was still coming to terms with sharing so much of himself with someone else, or at least, someone like me. I turned around, not much more able to resist the draw to him.

"I'll see you around." I said, smiling softly at him.

Setting into a sprint I barely heard his goodbye. But I had to get away. My body was reacting so strangely to him. I couldn't muster it anymore...

.

Getting to know who I was dealing with, I started figuring out the routine of the night shift guard who supposedly stood watch at the Hokage's archive. He was a middle-aged man by the name of Minori Rokoru who slept at day and left his house again at 2 pm for his daily routine. He had a girlfriend living in the lower parts of Konoha he would visit now and then, if he was not out drinking with some of his comrades.

The guard taking the day shifts was a father of two daughters, living in a smaller mansion at the outskirts of the upper district. He was in much better shape than the night shift guard and was fairly sensitive to his surroundings.

It was easy which one to choose as victim. If I had to break into that building without being discovered I had to know every little detail to perform this operation correctly.

Starting to grow fairly good at blending into the crowd, I stalked Minori for a couple of days without causing any suspicion. I had no time to visit Kenshin nor any time to see anyone except for Gai in the morning.

Standing behind a stand in the market district, eyes subtly focused on the black haired archive guard - for some time - I had been watching him pick out different kind of sakes from a salesman from the country of waves.

I crossed my arms and tugged the hoodie I was wearing closer around my neck. My hair was too distinctive to go unnoticed by, so I had to wear something that looked casual but still hid my hair. While the oblivious man was once again persuaded into trying a more expensive sake, he was unbeknownst of the fact that his bad habit of tasting liqueur before work was ultimately his biggest weakness.

"What're you doing?"

Jerking in shock, I looked at Kakashi who was standing by my side casually, hands tugged into his pockets as he looked over at the liqueur stand I had been watching. For a heartbeat, adrenalin washed through me at the thought of having been caught.

"Nothing. Just hanging." I responded casually and shrugged.

Out of nowhere Kakashi grabbed my arm and started dragging me towards a nearby ally. I was so startled by his actions that I followed completely flabbergasted, by-passers giving us strange looks. He's mad... I can feel it. He's definitely not glad. Oh god, I'm busted. A sudden fear rose in me, his iron-grip around my wrist seeming to tighten as we went along. He shoved me up against a wall like a rag-doll and I grunted, suddenly becoming fired up at his bad treatment. The last time I'd seen him like this was when we were about to leave for the land of ice.

"What're you doing Toshi?!" He hissed, towering over me, still holding tightly onto my wrist to have a certain control of me.

"What're you talking about?! Let go of me!" I growled at him and tried to snatch my hand away.

But Kakashi wasn't stupid. Why did I even bother to lie to him? He could easily put two and two together. Asking him about the archive and then finding me accidentally hanging out around the night shift guard. Not quite so clever on my side.

"You have been keeping Minori under surveillance haven't you? If you're thinking about what I think you're about to do, you better stop right now." He hissed.

Something I hadn't felt in a long time rose in me. It was Eien's chakra that surged through me, and her restlessness starting to rise as my own temperament did.

"Kakashi, let go." I said dryly, scowling at him while trying to maintain my composure.

"Not before you tell me what you're planing!" He bristled and leaned forward, looking at me levelly, his eyes determined and none wavering, trying frustrated - I assumed - to read my mind.

I grabbed his collar with my free hand gritting my teeth in restraint and pulled myself closer to him in pure defiance.

"Let. Go!" I warned. He didn't waver one bit at the threat in my voice, but only seemed to tower more over me.

"No." He responded, grabbing my other wrist and wriggled my hand free of his collar.

Green eyes stared into one onyx, the tension growing thick. I could barely muster a word in restraint from keeping Eien's murderous instincts at bay. I had polished the instinct, but it could still push me over the edge.

"I-I I can't." I breathed, trying with all my might to fight back her instincts.

A cold scowl lingered on his features for a moment before realization seemed to dawn upon him, and his eyes widened briefly as his grip on my wrists loosened.

"I just need a sec." I added, averting my eyes from his intense gaze when I felt him turn down the determination a notch.

Panting in exhaustion I looked at Kakashi's shoes as he let me calm down. The sense of security and understanding he gave me was overwhelming for a brief moment, so I allowed myself to lean my forehead against his chest, close to his neck. He allowed it, not backing down one inch as I panted away, sweat starting to trickle down my forehead.

"Just take your time." He said softly and released my wrists.

I breathed through my nose and exhaled through my mouth as Gai had taught me. This was a major downfall. How come the chakra was suddenly triggered so badly?

"Should I?.."

Kakashi's hand traveled up to my shoulder suggestively.

"No!" I breathed, shrugging his hand away.

I remembered clearly the last time this had happened so badly - in the woods where we had found two robbers. Kakashi had stroked the area around the pearl in my neck immediately snapping me out of that murderous state of mind. But this time I could control it myself.

He respectfully understood and just left his long hand on my shoulders as I started to get it under control.

"Sorry." I growled, closing my eyes to concentrate on the feel of his hand comfortingly on my shoulder.

He sighed softly in response "Don't be. You can't help it."

With slower breaths, finally getting the chakra under control I lifted my head away and adjusted my eyes to his marine blue shirt. When I slowly looked up, I met his worried eyes, a hidden determination still lingering in them. He wasn't going to let the subject go.

"Why did that just happen?" He asked, hand still resting on my shoulder.

"I-I don't know." I breathed "Guess it was the heat of the discussion." and the fact that it was him I got rilled up about. I was falling too deeply for him.

"It's my fault. Sorry for attacking you like that." He said that like he talking about something humiliating.

Well well well, he was really starting to show some care for me lately.

"No... Thank you for being there for me." I admitted with much effort and wasn't able to look him in the eyes "You're the only one who knows about these 'happenings'"

Kakashi's POV.

It touched him deep down to see the green eyed blonde struggle like that. It mortifyingly reminded him of that time in the cave in the land of ice, where she'd been screaming out in pain before Eien had taken over her body. He cursed himself for not noticing sooner that she was struggling. The worst thing was, that he could do nothing about it. At least he wasn't allowed to help her, and he had to respect that.

More over, as he had realized that she was plotting to break into the forbidden archive, he was down right frightened for her future. Not that she would turn into a bad person, but frightened that she would be caught and thrown into prison again. He could never forgive himself if she ended up there again. The mere fact the he even got angry with her had shocked him deep down. She was affecting him a lot - a lot more than anyone else lately.

"You're the only one who knows about these 'happenings'" She muttered, leaning defeated against the wall.

He felt that pull towards her again, her fingers clutching his shirt, urging him forward. He gulped, eyes traveling to the hollow of her throat, his anger suddenly turning into something entirely not anger. After their spar a week ago, he felt like he was slipping away, loosing himself somehow, by constantly having her in the back of his mind. Even his books couldn't distract him, or he would find himself imagining her into the books. It wasn't like him at all... She really got under his skin.

In that moment Kakashi was brought face to face with the realization that protecting her was the single most important thing in his life. Because without her...

No, he couldn't think like that. He blinked at her and tried to gain back a passive facade, although her liquid green eyes didn't make it damned easier.

"Please don't do this Toshi." He begged, removing his hand from her shoulder to pinch the bridge of his nose.

"I have to." She said, jaw locked in determination.

"You know what will happen if you get caught."

"Yes. But I know what I'm doing. I've even got the Root and ANBU that are keeping watch over me, fooled by clones." She explained.

Those eyes, he thought to himself seeing the fierce determination that shone through.

"You don't know what you're getting yourself into." He sighed, for a moment allowing her to see how worried he was.

Unbeknownst to him, she could already see that, and was fighting an inner battle, knowing that she could disappoint him easily if this failed.

"That's why I'm preparing so thoroughly. I have to know Kakashi. I have to know how the system works. I have to know who Root is and who ANBU is. It's nagging me every single day that I'm incapable of protecting myself against all these authorities because I have no clue about who they are and how they operate." She sighed and looked away. "I wont ask you to betray your village by giving me classified information Kakashi. That's why I have to do this my own way."

Kakashi felt like he was listening to himself talking. She would draw her own conclusions rather than just accepting what she was told, just like he would do himself. He'd done the exact same thing once, breaking into the hokages private archive. The only difference was that he had been caught by the hokage himself.

"Please let me do this Kakashi!" She begged frustrated.

Why couldn't he just tell her no? Why did he always find himself in dilemmas between those he cared about and the village. He couldn't turn her in, he knew that much. But he was afraid - afraid of making the wrong choice like he'd done before. He studied her clear eyes for a moment, finding himself getting lost in them. He cared too much for her to restrain her anymore. The copy ninja sighed in defeat.

"On the north side of the building, under a round window on the upper story is a shaft." Toshi's eyes widened at the information he was suddenly giving her "Crawl inside of that, make sure to be soundless and conceal you chakra. Take the first left turn, then continue on until you can turn right again. Crawl straight and you'll find an opening which ends directly above the archive."

"Wait wait wait! How do you know this? It's almost as if you've done this yourself." She said in disbelief.

"That's because I have." He gave her a serious look, one that told her to keep this a secret. "The only difference was that I was caught by the hokage himself. Make sure to not make that mistake." He warned her.

"But why did you do it? You're like mr. loyal mcloyal" She breathed, not even attempting to hide her astonishment.

The tall grey haired man gestured for her to lower her voice, glancing suspiciously around the rooftops.

"Let's go and talk somewhere else." He said, suggesting with his body that they should leave the ally.

She stood for a second, looking after him dumb-founded before she trudged to his side as they entered the broad streets of the market district, shops about to close down for the day.

"I don't get it. Why're you helping me?" She said, trying briskly to follow his long strides.

Yes, that was the question. He couldn't ever possibly hope to express that to her. He cared about her. He cared about Gai too and other ninjas in the village. He would do the same for Gai, but for others? He wasn't even sure himself why he did it. She was a criminal on probation for crying out loud... And also an intelligent, beautiful, strong, young woman with a vigorous free spirit who happened to have a soft spot for him and sought out his guidance. Flattered, he felt a surge of heat at that thought. The pull he felt towards her was becoming a nuisance, now even getting him into trouble.

It made him feel special, though he disbanded that feeling as soon as he felt it. He didn't like to feed his ego, but he couldn't change the fact that he was one of Konoha's most special ninjas. Yet, with her, he felt a different kind of special. Like, he wanted to be around her all the time, even touch her, because she was uniquely as special to him as he was to her. She would always have his back and maybe now it was his turn to have her back. Deep down he knew she would even break the laws for him, even follow him if he choose to betray Konoha one day.

Subconsciously Kakashi's mind was dealing with everything they had been through, while he shoved back feelings and emotions and urges that got harder and harder to deny every day he did. His mind was subconsciously putting all facts and feelings that he tried so hard to ignore - together into one sum up...

"I'm asking myself that too."

Toshi's POV

This was certainly a change in character. Settling down at a ramen shop, Kakashi explained without great details why he had once broken into the archive. Apparently in his ANBU years he'd been approached by this Danzo, about suspicions towards The Lord hokage and had made it his own agenda to find out what was really going on. I had a feeling there was much more to the story than what he told me, but decided not to press the subject as he was already helping me doing something illegal. It was at times like these that I would never even consider questioning our bond.

"You really surprised me when you decided to help me. I was even afraid you were going to blab to the hokage." I admitted in a hushed voice.

Kakashi had a kind of defeated look to him, like he had given up always being against me, instead deciding to accept my choices. It was very unlike him, especially when I was going to do something this reckless. But then again, he had done this himself once.

"Well... I can't keep treating you like a criminal anymore. You're much more than that." He sounded like he was confessing a humiliating weakness.

I almost thought I didn't hear right. Startled I looked at him, and him at me, his expression calm and honest. I felt my cheeks heat up, blood pumping in my ears at the realization that he finally acknowledged me, not only as an independent being, but also as a close friend he cared about.

"Kakashi, I don't know what to say." I subtly clenched my fist, trying to hide how moved I was.

"Thanks." I added, not able to look at him while saying it.

"You shouldn't thank me."

I looked back at him surprised. What did he mean?

"You shouldn't thank me for stating the obvious. I should've told you this a long time ago." Now he was the one not able to look at me.

I gulped. He really meant what he was saying. He was being vulnerable-Kakashi again. The tension between us was thick, as it often was lately. I just stared at him in disbelief, not quite able to comprehend what was going on between us. Grown used to staying away from him and keep a minimum amount of physical contact, I had to admit that I found it hard not to capture him in a bone crushing hug right in that moment. He was so damned hot, sitting there all tall, with his head in one hand, while gazing distantly ahead, his broad shoulders relaxed through the thin fabric of the navy blue ninja shirt.

Looking back at my noodles I tried to regain my common sense, but found myself so touched by his words that I couldn't think of anything else. My stomach was like tied up in a knot of feelings that just waited to explode at something or someone.

"Well, you're not that bad yourself." I admitted softly. Really? That was the best I could come up with?!

I tried to save it by giving him a sheepish smile as he looked at me, seeming to live up a bit. Kakashi was about to say something when:

"Toshi?"

I turned around perplexed when a familiar voice snapped me out of Kakashi and I's little world.

"Kenshin?"

The tall black haired ninja stood, halfway inside the area of the ramen shop, like he had seen me from the street, but wasn't sure of it was me he had seen. Kenshin's eyes wandered to Kakashi who just looked at him plainly. Clearly it didn't suit him one bit I was eating dinner with the infamous copy ninja.

"What're you doing here? I thought you were... I thought you were busy." He said, not able to hide the jealousy in his eyes. I had told Kenshin a couple of times now that I didn't have the time to see him, and seeing me here with Kakashi probably gave him the wrong idea.

Well, he had just interrupted a pretty important conversation. It wasn't very fair of me, but Kakashi would always be my number one priority.

"Just catching up with Kakashi here." I said bluntly and tilted my head towards Kakashi.

"Oh... Alright." He answered, trying hard to hide his disappointment.

"Well then I won't disturb you anymore." He added and gave me a half-hearted smile.

"I'll see you another day Kenshin." I answered, giving him a serious nod.

Now wasn't really a good time to explain anything to him. Not that he was ever going to know what I was planning. I didn't trust him enough for that. He nodded to me and then to Kakashi before disappearing into the street again.

"That was kind of cold." The grey haired ninja commented, eyes still looking into the street indifferently.

"What? No it wasn't." I responded and started shoveling down the last soup in my bowl.

"He thinks we're on a date." Kakashi continued.

"Well, then he doesn't read me very well. Not as well as you at least."

His eyes sparkled for the briefest of moments before he turned to his bowl of ramen soup.

"I don't know if you know this yourself. But you have a way of reaching people. That strange ability you have to sense peoples presence and mood, being able to manipulate your chakra out of your body, I think it subconsciously makes people feel like they have a connection to you." Kakashi looked into his soup, stirring his chopsticks around the remaining ramen.

"We've been around each other so much that I can't help knowing you so well, even if I don't want to." He added.

I found myself waiting for him to say that last thing: 'that's why I can't keep my distance and push you away, no matter how hard I try.' But it never came. It would be too out of character of him to keep on talking about what was going on in his mind.

"I never thought about it that way. I just thought it was paying off to be nice to people." I smiled sheepishly at him.

"I guess that helps a bit too." He answered cheekily soft.

I couldn't believe he was admitting that we had something special - that he couldn't just forget about me by staying away. We had become too close.

.

This was it. This what what I had prepared for. Crouching in the top of a roof, clad in black clothes the pale moonlight was lighting up the hokages building. The city lay before me. The night air smelled of leaves and smoke and the moon cast a pale light out amongst thin skies.

"Nephtys, Heket." I called in a low voice.

The two cats emerged from the shadows behind me, their calm cunning movements and piercing eyes reminding me how dangerous the two could be.

"Yes Lady Toshi." They said in unison.

"Check the perimeters of the building. Notify me of anyone is standing watch and their whereabouts." I commanded and gave the cats a confirming nod.

"Heket?" The female cat looked at the white male cat.

"I'm on it." The male said, having recovered from his wounds.

Nephthys stood by my side, her black figure seeming to blend in with the surroundings, except her fierce blue eyes. The two had a telepathic bond, one the informer while other one was the investigator.

I had spend a considerable amount of time with Nephthys and Neshkent in my apartment, not just for help with the planning of this, but also to get to know them.

"There is a couple at the eastern corner. Heket is making them leave." Nephthys said.

I nodded in response. I hadn't spend much time with Heket. He was still mentally wounded at his defeat, but would do anything if Nephthys thought it was worth it. But he was an invaluable component when working with the two cats. Without the other they wouldn't work as efficiently.

"They're gone." She said.

A cold wind blew across the roofs as we waited in silence. I fought a shiver, deeply focused on the mission ahead.

"Clear." She simply said.

On cue I was off the roof. Every step and route was planned down to fine details. Hiding my chakra I landed on a terrace just as a shadow of a guard disappeared around the corner. Not wasting a second I jumped upwards, using every pipe and window to reach the roof from a safe ankle. The night was dark, the large circle rooftop darker. Wind whipped through my clothes, making the fabric snap. I glanced around the roof hoping no one could hear.

"A guard has stopped." Nephthys emerged beside me as if she stepped right out of the a shadow.

I moved swiftly into the shadows where the moon didn't touch, standing silently as a statue. There were guards stationed around the building and every ten minutes one of them would check the rooftop. If one stopped it meant he could maybe feel my presence at certain places. It seemed like minutes of holding my breath before Nephthys spoke again.

"Go." She said and I was back to running across the rooftop.

I reached the other side, and swooped down to hang across the edge, using a high voltage box as footing. Another shadow disappeared around the corner. I swung down, using a gutter as leverage and found the round window. It was small, but I managed to use it as footing and gathered my body almost cat-like to get a grip at the bars in front of the window.

My muscles was burning as I slowly raised myself down to the shaft and freed one hand to soundlessly screw bolts free of the shaft entrance. Sweat was starting to show on my forehead and the stress of the time limit was ever becoming more and more present.

"You must hurry." Nephthys stood at the high voltage box above me, her tail swinging swiftly back and forth.

It took some time and if I started to rush the process I would only drag out the time. Now came the tricky part. I lifted off the metal plate, still hanging in one handand lifted myself up, fighting not to groan at the effort. I almost threw myself inside the shaft, put down the metal plate and with much effort turned around to fasten it loosely. I curled up and turned around once again and started crawling, turning on a small flashlight and putting it in my mouth. Nephthys was behind me, how, I didn't know.

There was a dangerous silence to the shaft, a silence so deep it could be heard. I was somewhere I wasn't supposed to be, breaking rules, putting my entire future on the line, just to gather information for personal use. I realized how insane this was, but the thrill of the game gave me a wild kick of adrenalin. I crawled accordingly to the instructions Kakashi had given me and soon found an opening in the shaft. Once again screwing bolts free, I lifted the plate of metal, stuck my head down and lit around the room with my flashlight.

My eyes widened at the immense amount of books and scrolls stacked on high bookshelves. I jumped down silently, hoping the liquor I had persuaded the merchant from the hidden mist to sell, was working its wonders.

I started searching through shelves, a tense knot permanently having settled in my stomach. I didn't like being here. I found a shabby old journal with a leather-bound cover, on the side saying "Notes on Root." That sounded promising.

I carefully drew out the journal, noting it's position and went to a square table in the center of the archive. I blew off some dust, and opened the pages. In a nice but comely handwriting the name 'Hiruzen Sarutobi' was scribbled down.

Notes on Root for future hokages:

~ Root carries out missions that Danzo believes will benefit Konoha. Because of its core views as "the unseen ones who support the great tree of Konoha from the depths of the earth", some of these missions has been less than respectable. The organization's top priority is its secrecy, and most of its missions are carried out in the dark - autonomous of my authority. Also unlike normal Anbu, members of Root take orders only from Danzo instead of the Kage, unless ordered to otherwise.

~ Root has been officially disbanded after the Uchiha Clan Massacre due to Danzo spearheading the tragedy, but remains active as an underground organization.

Right, I did hear about the massacre. It was definitely a black chapter in the history of Konoha. A whole clan slaughtered by one of it's own members. My thoughts went to Sasuke, the silent black haired child with eyes as cold as mine had once been.

~ Root is an extremely strict, and secretive group and as such each member of the organization has a cursed seal imprinted on the back of their tongues by Danzo, which when activated, will paralyse their entire body if they try to speak anything about Danzo or the organisation, rendering them unable to speak or move.

I read the last thing over twice. That was seriously disturbing. To have ones freedom of speech taken away like that.

~ Danzo trains his members to lose their emotions by growing up as brothers from a young age, only to later be made to kill each other. This is done to kill any sense of sentiment or emotional attachment. This method was extremely similar, if not identical, to the Kirigakure Academy's former graduation test. Each member has a codename; even the members themselves apparently do not know their original names. Slow, long-term brainwashing has also been used to further the success of a mission.

~ Danzo recruit Root members himself, without my interference. He favors those from clans who possess special techniques, such as the Aburame, Yamanaka, and Uchiha clan. Interestingly enough, those who are selected don't go through the traditional training that requires them to kill their team-mates.

The rest was not important, only descriptions and bad drawings of basic Root gear. I tapped the book in thought. The intel was relatively disturbing and definitely told more about the Root than I had hoped. But my curiosity was still not settled. I turned some more pages, but they were blank. Apparently, even the hokage didn't know much about the Root.

"Someone's coming." Nephthys was at my side on cue, her heaven-blue eyes piercing mine.

A feel of dread washed through me. I smacked the journal close, suddenly breathing quicker in fear.

"Who and from where?" I asked, trying my best to keep my mind cool and logical.

"Heket is following him through the shaft." She answered.

My heartbeat dropped, the fear replaced with confusion.

"The shaft?" I muttered.

The hokage couldn't be following me through the shaft. Just picturing that old man crawling in there only to catch me off guard, was simply wrong.

"Give the command and he shall attack." She said, twisting slowly as she walked, urgency evident in her voice.

If I reached out my chakra to feel the mind he would simply feel my presence. It was a long shot, but I clutched the journal close and hid behind one of the bookshelves, my heart starting to hammer again. If I was seen, I would be kicked out of Konoha society permanently.

"It is the human that helped you, when you were poisoned by Heket." The black cheetah said, moving with me around the shelves.

"The what?" Realization dawned upon me "Kakashi?"

"No no! He's a friend." I added promptly

I strode back and looked up at the opening in the shaft. Kakashi was just as sneaky as he was intelligent. I couldn't sense him at all. Surely I was becoming in need of these two cats.

Grey hair popped up and an indifferent expression peeped out from the hole in the shaft.

"Hey there." He whispered casually and waved at me.

I shot him a glare, putting my hands on my hips. What on earth was he doing here? And how did he know I would strike today?

"Have you been stalking me?!" I hissed at him.

"No... Perhaps a bit." He said, scratching his hair before he moved to jump down. He raised himself down, before letting go and landing soundlessly on the floor.

"What're you doing here Kakashi? You're going to get us caught." I hissed, eyes blazing at him.

"That was kind of offending." He said raising and eyebrow.

I crossed my arms stubbornly and stared at his tall form, standing in a forbidden place like it was the most natural thing in the world.

"Okay okay." He said raising his hands in defense. "I thought that since you were going here anyways I might as well follow you. There is a book in here I would like to take a closer look at."

"Sometimes you really surprise me. No one would ever suspect you of doing a thing like this. Yet you know that, and use it to your advantage." I said, and thought it through afterwards. The copy ninja surely was indifferent to matters of honor when it came to these things. But no one knew.

He smiled cheekily - it was evident under the mask - and patted me hard on the shoulder.

"You figured me out." He said teasingly and walked past me seeming to search for a specific section.

"Anyways. I just read a few things about Root. But I want to find something more specific." I whispered.

Nephthys stalked silently beside me, her eyes fixed mistrustfully on Kakashi. His long hand ghosted over a row of books before he pulled our another journal.

"Here's one." He said and threw at me. I grabbed it awkwardly, my temperament rising at his indiscretion.

"Could you be more careful?!" I hissed before gathering my composure. "How many times have you been in here anyway?"

He surely knew where the books where placed. I squinted my eyes at his back. Kakashi wasn't Konoha's elite ninja for nothing - he even broke some of the laws for his own purposes, not regarding any of the consequences that could follow. He was that confident in his skills.

He shrugged "A few times now and then."

Clutching the journal I simply turned around to read it in peace, leaving him to find whatever he needed to read.

Known missions of Root, I read, scribbled down in another handwriting than Sarutobi's. The author was unknown.

Infiltrate Iwagakure

Assigned to: Nono Yakushi

Outcome: Success

Danzo had Nono who is regarded as an elite in the field of intelligence gathering, infiltrate Iwagakure in order to confirm intelligence they received that Iwagakure was planning to attack Konoha. Though she initially refused as she had left the organisation, she eventually accepted the mission. She successfully infiltrated the village and remained there for several years. She was critically wounded, however, after attacking Kabuto Yakushi whom had also infiltrated the village as a spy.

Infiltrate Great Hidden Villages

Assigned to: Kabuto Yakushi

Outcome: Success

Danzo had Kabuto placed into all the other Great Hidden Villages (and possibly other villages) over the course of a few years to spy on them for Root.

I scowled at the two missions. Apparently two ninjas from Konoha had been fighting against each other. I put a hand to my chin and read on.

Assassinate Kabuto/Nono

Assigned to: Nono Yakushi, Orochimaru

Outcome: Failure/Partial Success

Kabuto and Nono has become a threat to Root, after they have become "too good" of spies, Danzo has both individuals kill each other. Slowly brainwashing Nono, by gradually switching photos of Kabuto with pictures of a different person and saying it was him, Danzo revealed that Kabuto had joined Root for the orphanage's sake and told her that they would release him once she assassinated a certain person. Unbeknownst to her when she was carrying out this mission, she was attacking the real Kabuto. Ultimately, Nono was cut down by Kabuto who fled after she didn't remember him. This mission culminated in Nono's death. Orochimaru who was supposed to kill either one who survived, turned treacherous and did not complete the mission.

I stared at the page in disbelief. This was so corrupt that I could barely comprehend it. Someone from Konoha, a simple man named Danzo, killed off fellow Konoha ninja's because they were becoming "too good". What. The. Fuck.

The Uchiha clan popped into my head. It was the most famous and strong clan of all time and they had supposedly all been killed at the same time because of a clan member seeking power. At least that was what the public knew about the incident. I squinted my eyes: what if the Uchiha clan massacre was some kind of plot too? I glanced at Kakashi, wondering if I was being too suspicious and if I should keep these thoughts to myself.

"Is it true that the Uchiha massacre was coursed by a clan-member seeking power?" I asked Kakashi.

"Uh... Yeah, it was Itachi Uchiha. The prodigy of the clan at that time." Kakashi answered absentmindedly.

"How do you know that's true?" I asked.

"I don't see why else he should slaughter his own family." Kakashi said with a shrug, still searching for some book.

What if Itachi was commanded to slaughter his clan for the benefit of the village? After what I had just read, it seemed like a possibility. A scary one at that. Konoha was suddenly not the happy utopia I thought it was. I kept these suspicions to myself though, seeing that Kakashi had no seconds doubts about the massacre.

"This is messed up. I'm never getting involved with Root." I whispered frozen.

Kakashi moved up behind me and slightly around to peep at the pages. His chest touched my shoulder blade and his presence overwhelmed me for a moment.

"Oh that affair. Yeah, pretty messed up." He said as if it wasn't a big deal.

"Do Konoha really do that!? I mean kill people if they become too good?" I whispered in disbelief.

Kakashi simply shrugged and turned one of the pages. "Sometimes things must be done for the benefit of the village. Of course this is Root affairs, and they are generally darker than other affairs. The ANBU devision, who are more public, usually keep out of things like that. But Danzo made a call on the assassination of Kaubto and Nono and Root obeyed. Kabuto is still alive though and lives in the city, unbeknownst to the fact that all of this was Danzo's doing. "

"This is why I have to know what the hell I'm running around doing. I take orders from the hokage, but I don't wear headband or mask. I could easily be caught up in some kind of scheme." I muttered.

"And that is why you aren't wearing a headband. You ask questions and you're too smart to be trusted to carry out orders without hesitation. You're not yet loyal to Konoha, only to yourself. I don't think the hokage would do anything to harm you though." He looked down at me a faint smile evident in his eye.

He was so close, and in the dim light of the flashlight, the room suddenly seemed small. I tore my eyes away and bit my lip.

"I suppose you're right about that." I answered softly.

Maybe I should stop thinking so much about the whole picture and just do as I was told. It was hard though. It went against my very nature. Kakashi strode around me and sat down in one of the chairs, carefully putting down a thick book.

"But I'm glad you wont get involved with Root. Although you're already more involved than you think." He said, opening the huge leatherback.

"What's that supposed to mean?" I said raising an eyebrow.

"You're so observant Toshi. Yet you fail to see the obvious." He said, half paying attention to me.

I felt my temperament rising. Why was he being so cryptic?!

"You'll find out what I'm talking about soon enough." He added, peeping briefly up and putting a thumb to his headband before raising it up to reveal the red sharingan.

I huffed deciding that I didn't want to give him the satisfaction of convincing him to tell me.

"It's that Orochimaru again. I've heard his name a few times before. Who exactly is he?" I asked and looked the page through once again.

"Oh..." Kakashi froze for a moment visibly uncomfortable at the name. "He was one of the legendary three sannins. He was the hokage's pupil and later joined Root to work directly under Danzo. He turned on the village, doing illegal experiments. Now he's an outlaw."

"I see. And you're sure there wasn't some kind of conspiracy behind that too?" I asked skeptically.

"Pretty sure. I was there when it happened." He muttered flipping through pages, his sharingan reading them in seconds.

I turned some of the pages, skimming the different missions written down. One in particular stood out as I read it. This was written in Sarutobi's own handwriting.

Assassinate Hiruzen Sarutobi

Assigned to: Kinoe and several others

Outcome: Failure

Unable to tolerate Hiruzen's "passive" approach to governing Konohagakure, Danzo sought to eliminate him shortly after resuming his post following the death of the Fourth Hokage. His Root members were disguised as a foreign group. The plan failed before it even began as Kakashi Hatake — a new Root member — chose to inform the Third Hokage of the treason, taking the Third's place to lure out the assailants and consequently making Danzo power-hungry and amoral nature known.

I swallowed a lump in my throat, my eyes flickering to Kakashi. So he had been a member of Root once? But had chosen to act against his orders. I realized how much respect I was slowly getting for Kakashi. He acted purely out of moral choices rather than what he was ordered to do. I hoped I could be like that too at some point.

"You were Root once. You became that when you started doubting the hokage." I stated, remembering what he had told me a few days ago about his reasons for breaking in here the first time.

He looked up at me surprised "Yeah... I was, but it was mistake. No matter what Danzo says you should think twice about it. I didn't unfortunately."

"Pretty serious business that he attempted to murder the hokage. Why's this man still roaming the city freely?"

"There was no evidence that pointed to him. What you're reading is simply the hokage's suspicions." He said.

"Right..." I closed the journal thinking I had enough info about the Root and started searching for a book about the ANBU which was fairly easy to find compared to the Root journal

"Special Assassination and Tactical Squad" it said.

~ ANBU black-ops take orders directly from the Kage, performing special high-level missions, such as assassinations and torture. The Anbu usually work in teams formed to the requirements of the mission, ensuring maximum success. The shinobi in the Anbu are hand-picked by the Kage, chosen for their individual capabilities and special skills. Age, gender, background, or previous rank bear no weight in this decision. Members can be relieved from the Anbu by the Hokage and reassigned elsewhere.

In Kakashi's case, he had been reassigned by Sarutobi from the Anbu to the regular forces as a jonin leader, I remembered.

They wear their mask even in their own village, for their identity as an Anbu agent is to be known only by the Kage and village elders, with the exception of Konohagakure's "Root" Anbu members.

Konoha ANBU are under direct control of the Hokage, and therefore, cannot be arrested by the regular police forces without a warrant. They protect the village from exceptional threats, conduct high-risk missions into enemy territory, and deal with extremely strong ninja. They are also responsible for carrying out assassinations, tracking, surveillance, and missions requiring specially trained ninja. Some ANBU serve as interrogators that probe the minds of enemy ninja to learn information valuable to the village. If an Anbu is mortally wounded in battle, they are required to destroy their bodies to prevent any information from getting into enemy hands.

Surely if I ever was to choose, ANBU sounded more appealing than Root. Maybe the hokage wanted me to become an interrogator as he very well knew about my ability to enter people's mind, but had to start me up as a basic assassin. I fought a shiver. God I hated this game of authority. So many question roaming around in my head!

"What're you looking for anyway?" I said and closed the book softly.

He was silent for a moment before answering "I'm looking in an old clan book, hoping to find some kind of clan that could match your abilities."

I was perplexed for a moment, blinking dumbly at him as I realized he was doing research on me.

"Detailed books about clans are kept in here to preserve their secrets, so it's hard to find anything in the public library. At first I thought you somehow belonged to the Yamanaka clan with your blonde hair and mind probing abilities. But they have a secret clan jutsu while your ability solely relies on your manipulation of chakra." He explained.

"... Wow. And how long have you been doing this research?" I asked, not really sure how to react to this.

He paused for a moment and looked at me lazily "I guess ever since I met you. But it was put on pause when I couldn't find more books to read and then I saw an opportunity today."

"Okay... So have you found anything in that one?" I asked and moved to sit beside him in a chair.

"No not yet." He said and continued going systematically through the pages. "Though I found a small sub section under a long dead clan that described a technique which tranfered souls or chakra into objects. That could explain Eien and that thing in your neck, but it doesn't explain your other ability."

I made a pondering sound, putting my chin in my hand, not able to read one sentence before Kakashi turned the next page. After three minutes, Kakashi stopped at a page that seemed to be descendants of the Sage of the six paths' son, whose name was unknown.

"Here's something." He muttered. "The Shiramoto clan. It's only mentioned in this small fragment, but it seems they are a sub-branch of the second son of the sage of six paths. In reference to the fact that chakra was wrongfully used inwardly for personal purposes, ninjutsu and genjutsu, it says: Only one family, the Shiramoto clan, practiced the gift of chakra - that was originally given to connect with one another - and knows how to reach out and connect in mutual understanding. The clan has long since been lost."

I put my hand on the page, studying it closely. "It doesn't say more?" I asked.

"No." He replied and looked at the next page.

"So... Maybe me real surname could me Shiramoto?" I said in thought.

"It could be a possibility. But we'll never find out I guess. Unless we stumble upon some more information about this clan." The grey haired ninja sighed relaxing the hand that held the flashlight.

"Interesting." I muttered.

Our chairs stood close and I felt his arm brush against mine, when he relaxed it on the armrest. I turned off my flashlight and leaned back comfortably, feeling strangely safe despite being somewhere I wasn't allowed. We both sat in silence for a while him reading the last pages and I - between my train of thoughts about ANBU and Root - thinking about how much I enjoyed his presence here. Every few second, though, my eyes shifted back to him. I didn't know what I expected to see, if anything. But I did it without thinking.

"There isn't anymore." He said and leaned back defeated.

I shrugged. Kakashi seemed more interested than me to find my origins. A piercing red eye glanced at me. I fought not to flinch away at the observant expression, like he was seeing right into my mind.

"We should leave and not linger more than necessary." I heard myself say.

"Agreed." He replied.

Soon I was removing the metal-plate by the shaft and peeped out into a silent rainy night. Kakashi was behind me, keeping silent as we were supposed to. Nephthys who was still working as a communicator between Heket and I, stood somewhere outside, telling me when the coast was clear.

I hung myself out of the shaft, doing my best to blend in with the surroundings as I took the same path back to the rooftop where I started, expecting Kakashi to clean every trace of our visit.

In a heartbeat he stood my side and not seconds after came Nephthys and Heket into view. My heart was still beating fast of the rush of adrenalin. Rain poured down on us but the mood was too strange to notice.

"Let's go." Kakashi said putting a hand on my shoulder in a friendly manner.

"Yeah." I turned around to the Yin and Yang cheetahs. "Thank you very much for your help, you two. This was a success."

"Lady Toshi, summon us whenever you have the need." Nephthys said nodding at me gracefully. Heket imitated her before they disappeared in a blur of smock.

Kakashi turned to me "Lady Toshi?" He said skeptically, raising an eyebrow.

"I know I know. It's their thing." I retorted, waving at him dismissively.

Kakashi's hair was heavy with rain, droplets of water leaking from strands of grey hair. It reminded me of our spar a few weeks ago and it subconsciously sparked some butterflies in my stomach by the thought of that day.

"My apartment is close." He seemed to hesitate as he paused, one of his hands clenching into a fist. "If you want you can sleep over at my place. At least you don't have to run all the way home in this weather." He sounded like he was explaining himself.

I didn't know if I liked that or if it was a bad thing. Nevertheless was I surprised at the invitation.

"Uhm, sure. It'll be like old times." I said.

Speaking before thinking was the correct term of use here. I was only torturing myself by accepting his invitation.

We sprinted through dark night like shadows. The winds grew colder and more blustery with every passing minute, the deep contrast of happy summer memories of running in the rain, colliding with memories of almost freezing to death in the land of ice. I had to marvel at Kakashi's composure though, swift and silent, with wind snapping through his clothes. I was truly lucky to have come so close to such a brilliant ninja as he.

Kakashi's POV

They came trudging inside his apartment, both soaked and wet from head to toe. He walked in and turned on the light, unsure of wether it was a good idea to invite her here. He could hear her take in a deep breath and turned around to ask her if she remembered the smell, but almost bit his tongue when he saw her.

From the moment he had seen her inside the archive, he immediately noted her black outfit as sexy. It didn't cling tightly to her body, but still enough to show her curves and legs. Now it was surely clinging to her body. He cleared his throat:

"Do you want to borrow a t-shirt and some shorts?" He asked her, wondering why he was suddenly feeling nervous.

She looked down at herself with a raised eyebrow. It was then he cursed himself for having looked her up and down. Obviously she had noticed.

"Yeah, I'm not going to sleep in this." She said wryly.

The elite ninja walked past her and started digging for some clothes. His apartment had really seemed empty without her, and her sudden presence here made him excited and nervous. It wasn't like him. As he had thought before, he felt like he was loosing himself, discovering a knew side that had been hidden away. He never felt nervous around girls. He was elite, top trained in keeping his emotions in check, but around her, who knew him so well, they just seemed to act on their own free will. He had realized that as the days since their spar had passed by.

He handed her one of his old t-shirts he used to wear and a pair of navy blue shorts and turned around to let her undress. As he listened to fabric untying, snapping now and then, he couldn't help but picture how the wet fabric would stick to her bared skin as she pulled it down. Her bare shoulders would tense before she tugged it down revealing her back of scars and then the tip of the round lush curves of her bottom.

Kakashi felt a heated urge starting to manifest itself in his groin and immediately took in a sharp breath in surprise. This is Toshi! This is so unprofessional. Think of Gai, think of Gai, think of Gai. He pictured the bushy brows and bowl hair cut and the ever smiling man in a too tight green jumpsuit... That helped a lot.

"There I'm done" she enthused.

He turned around and even though it was much better seeing her in an unflattering t-shirt he still couldn't help but think she looked cute.

"Anyways I'll go an brush my teeth-" He looked at the watch-"It's three in the morning. We better catch some sleep."

He gathered some dry clothes to sleep in and made it to the bathroom, finding that he had been tense up until he closed the door.

Toshi's POV.

I hung up my clothes as best as I could manage in Kakashi's little apartment, all around me his pine-like, manly scent overwhelming my senses. To think that we had lived two people here once, and now it was like we couldn't be here without the space seeming too small.

I sat down in his bed to feel the softness and with a glance around the room I took up his sheets and took in a long deep breath. God, his scent was so alluring. I put down the sheet reminding myself that Kakashi only saw me as a friend and wasn't attracted to me.

Soft sheets were hidden under his bed but I wasn't able to find the futon that had once been my bed. Hesitantly I lay down closest to wall, convincing myself that it was ok to share bed as we had done it before. I folded my arms under my head and looked into the ceiling, an all to familiar feeling of safety and home coming over me.

With a sigh Kakashi came strolling inside, his posture relaxed and his face mask-less. He looked tired. The onyx eye rested on me while the other was closed, as he halted in the door way for a second.

"We're sharing bed now?" He commented, showing only the slightest discomfort about it.

My heart sunk momentarily, maybe he thought it was annoying to lie beside me. I had been sitting on his lap, the day we had made him spill the beans, but still, I felt so much insecurity around this kind of stuff.

"Well I couldn't find the futon." I said with a shrug, trying my best to be casual about it "Besides I think we've done worse than sharing a bed."

"... I guess you're right about that. Kind of silly of me." He said and scratched his hair.

What was going on with him? His whole image was build upon being indifferent and none-affected by anything. This was what I had asked for, vulnerable-Kakashi who I liked, but I had to get used to see him feel things and show it.

I scooped closer to the wall as he lay down in the bed, fighting a bit with the covers to be in the right position. Staring at the ceiling I waited for him to settle down, and when he did we both lay beside each other awkwardly in silence.

Why does this feel so intense though we're laying apart? I thought to myself, fidgeting with the edge of the cover. I felt like a lost duo was back in business. None of use wouldn't admit how well we actually worked together and how safe we felt around eachother. At least that was what I was feeling.

"So. Was it worth it?" He asked, breaking the silence.

"Definitely." I answered softly.

"How are you going to use the information you acquired?"

"... I'm not sure. Now I feel like I can make the right choices." I thought a bit on that one and looked Kakashi. "The hidden villages has been at peace for decade now. Although the battlefields offers easy moral choices and are forgiving of loud and flashy jutsu, I understand that peacetime missions favors stealth, cunning and discretion, and a firm grasp of situational ethics."

"Yes. Even though there's no war, threats can still be found all over the country." He responded.

"But those threats are lurking in the shadows and needs to be dealt with in silence to avoid a domino-effect." I said.

My grey haired friend glanced at me from the corner of his eyes, and endless stream of thoughts hidden behind them. Then he smirked softly at me, his spare upper lip and full lower lip twitching in amusement. Kakashi's eyes were deep set, I noted. It made him look foreign sometimes but also made him look that much more handsome and unique. He ruffled my hair with his long hand in a brotherly manner.

"You're going to do well. Maybe too well. You'll just end up surpassing me one day."

Even the muscle in his forearm was taut, defined. I slapped his hand away, knowing my hair looked stupid now, especially when being damp. Shooting him a glare I turned on my side to face him better.

"I've already surpassed you." I said and smirked, tugging the pillow under my chin.

His eyes rested briefly somewhere else than my eyes before they flickered back.

"No you haven't. I won the spar." He said cheekily.

"A taijutsu spar if I may remind you." I retaliated.

"And I won." He said simply and turned.

I was baffled when he reached his arm over me and started leaning closer to hover slightly over me.

"It wasn't a true test of strength." I said, trying my best not to squeak.

He leaned his face close to mine, which reminded me of lying inches away from a wolf's fangs. He either faked his oppressing confidence or he was messing me with again. I set my jaw defiantly, staring right back at him. I felt like I had the choice to either look away and submit, or keep the eye contact in challenge, just like dogs did. His breathing came down on me warm and sweet, and the hollow between our bodies became warm in an instant. And by mistake I felt an emotion roll off of him. A wave of something warm and longing, and by the blink of an eye it was gone.

Then he turned off the lights on the wall behind me and fell back on his side of the bed, leering victoriously. Something in me deflated like an untied balloon. That had been so intense and this time it wasn't just from my side, even though he was putting on a mocking grin. If hadn't felt that, I would've just thought he had been messing with me again, but the emotion was definitely there.

"Well as I said, maybe one day." He said and yawned, turning his back towards me, nuzzling into the covers.

I just stared the back of his head flabbergasted. That feel of emotion that rolled off him for a second. Had that really come from him? That meant he wasn't annoyed with me. Actually on the contrary, he liked staying this close to me.

"Anyway. I'm too tired to discuss. Thank you for being there for me today. Sleep well." I managed to say, keeping my voice carefully neutral.

"Yeah well don't get used to it... Sleep well." He said softly.

Maybe he liked me more than I gave him credit for. I thought back at our spar when I had sparked some goosebumps on his neck and the way he had acted, letting me sit on his lap and all. But I thought it was all in a friendly manner, at least from his side. I knew we had something special, but... God, I couldn't even explain the feeling that had rolled off him, to myself.

I nuzzled into the covers, listening to the rain outside tapping against his window, basking in Kakashi's scent. I was welcome here. I was wanted here beside him, even if he didn't want to admit that himself. A smile tugged in the corner of my lips. I was going to sleep safe and sound tonight.

---

Phew that was a long one.

In tribute to all my 100 followers I was thinking about making a short summer filler for the next chapter. That means it won't intirely interfere with the plot. I was thinking to make a "Shinobi beach trip", which would invole a lot of the original character (And of course Toshi and Kakashi) in a more casual chapter, where they all enjoy a day at the beach. - Would you guys like that, or should I just write the next real chapter?

Anyways give me your thoughts on this one, and I'll try to update as soon as I can :D