A/N: Once again apologies for the lateness. I've been playing about with this chapter for so long going from being really pleased with it to completely dispising it. Please let me know what you think, thank you readers and reviewers!

Chapter 10

We Are Worthy

When I finally awoke I was in Hecate's bed chamber. Selena and Hecate were both there staring down at me.
"Thank goodness!" Selena cried, "I thought I'd lost you."
My head was spinning, "Wh…? What happened?"
"You fainted," Hecate responded, placing a cool hand on my forehead, "But at least you did it after you'd finished singing."
I thought back to what had happened leading up to my blackout.
"Thea?" I asked.
"Don't worry about her," Hecate said. "Both her and Dinah have been taken before the Matriarch. I have given a full account to her of what happened and how they tried to sabotage you. They will not go unpunished."
"But... why?" I struggled to say as a sudden pain struck the back of my eyes.
"Dinah discovered your desire to serve Raziel, Thea must've told her. Dinah did not want Thea as her student... but the thought of my student serving Raziel was more than she could bear. She promised Thea that she would be given to Raziel if she did exactly as she said... Thea was consumed by this thought." My rage boiled beneath the surface, but I refused to show it. I would not show a moment of weakness. If Thea had betrayed me then I would not give her or Dinah the satisfaction of knowing how it had affected me. No one would know.
"And what of the selection? Have the vampires decided yet?" Selena shook her head.
"The selection will go ahead as planned, but I have one more card to play." Hecate spoke as she rose to her feet and left her bedchamber.
________________________

We gathered in the Followers' bedchamber. Isis had summoned us there. She was now starting to look old beyond her years, her dark hair was tinged with grey now, but still covered by her red scarf. Her face looked pale and thin and I was especially worried about her cough which had gotten progressively worse over the years.
"I'm sure you must all be aware of what has happened, but despite these events we must carry on as normal. Lord Kain has made his decision." She cleared her throat at this point.
I was still feeling weak from previous day but nothing was going to keep me from attending this, I had to know what the outcome was. I had to know if my efforts had succeeded.
Isis informed us that while I had been recovering, Kain himself had paid the Matriarch a visit and had discussed the selection with her, a very unusual occurrence which could only have meant that he was taking this very seriously. The Matriarch probably would have told Kain of our thoughts and our secret desires.
How embarrassing… The thought of that old witch telling Kain of my fantasies of both him and especially Raziel made knots in my stomach.
I looked at my friends. The side of Sophia's face was black from the impact of Dumah's fist, but despite that she was smiling.
Besides Thea they were all there. From what I'd heard from the others, both Thea and Dinah's punishment was to be thrown to the fledgling feral vampires… it was a death sentence. It had been a long time coming for Dinah as she had overstepped her mark countless times before now but had never done something that had significantly jeopardised another of her fellow worshippers like this, and then to have the 'audacity' to try and jeopardise Hecate's Follower. It was only because she was Raziel's higher concubine that she had managed to get away with it for so long. Now her chances were used up.
Thea was now considered tainted by what she had learnt from Dinah and was no longer worthy. I had no sympathy for either of them, regardless of the decision; they could both burn in Hell for all I cared right now.
Kain had been informed of these things when he had seen the Matriarch so he was fully aware of the situation.
Isis began to call out our names and telling us who we would be serving until the day we died, which for many of us would not be too far away.
No one seemed particularly disappointed by Isis' words. Lilly smiled when it was announced that she would be given to Dumah, although this was no surprise for despite their first encounter where he had pulled her to her feet by her hair her infatuation for him had not subsided. If anyone could put up with his brutality it was definitely her.
Sophia was given to Lord Rahab that day to which she breathed a sigh of relief and I knew that of all of us she would serve him well.
To my dismay Selena was offered to Lord Zephon. She only smiled at this and would later tell me that if what I had seen that day in his bedchamber was accurate then it would give her an excuse to become more flexible in her dance routines. I shuddered at the thought, I had not seen that side of my best friend before.
The others were given to their respective Lords and as far as I could tell everyone was happy. I was the last name called, and so far no one had been given to Kain or Raziel. I held my breath as I awaited the decision.
"Anastasia, you will be given to Kain," my heart sank as the name was said, he had chosen me for himself, despite my longing for his eldest son, a longing that he must've known of by now, "He has requested your company immediately, Ana. You are to attend his bedchamber right away." She started to cough heavily.
His bedchamber? This soon? I stood wide eyed and dumb for a moment as I took this in. I began to shake my head in defiance of the decision, tears came from my eyes. It was then that I knew just how much I loved Raziel…

I could not deny it. I was a worshipper, this was my calling, this was my purpose in life since the moment I was born; but I was in love, how could I be in love with him. I was here to serve, not to love.
I ran crying to Hecate who comforted me as she led me to the Blood Pit again.
"I love him, I love him," I sobbed in between shallow breaths.
"Calm yourself child. You mustn't cry, you will displease Kain if you do."
"I don't care!" I exclaimed, "I don't want him. I want Raziel!" Hecate turned round quickly and smacked me hard across the face. She had never struck me before and it shocked me enough to stop crying.
"You will not blaspheme within these walls!" Her eyes were glowing with rage, "What is the matter with you? You foolish girl, you are blessed; can you even imagine how many of your peers would rather be in your position?"
"Then let them go to him. Let them please him in the ways that you do. Please, don't make me go…"
Hecate gripped my shoulders and made me face her full on, "Do you remember your home Ana? Do you remember your parents?"
The memory was distant but I could recall my father's face with clarity and how happy he'd been after I'd been chosen by Kain.
"Think about them," She urged, "Think of the ideals they had for you when they sent you away. How proud would they be to know what you've become? You, chosen by the God of Gods to serve him in a manner reserved only for the truly noble of heart."
Her words hit their mark. I was here to serve, but that did not take away the pain of daggers in my heart.
My eyes pleaded with hers in one final attempt.
"Ana, this is neither your decision nor mine," she said softly as she wiped the tears from my cheeks, "Besides, you cannot deny your feelings for Lord Kain. I know how you have envisaged yourself with him on many occasions."
"The Matriarch knows nothing," I objected, aware that if Hecate was aware of my secret longings then she could only have acquired this information from our Mother, "My feelings of lust for Kain are not the same as those in my heart for Raziel."
"Then you will learn to make them so. Be proud of what you've achieved today my dear, learn to love Him as you would Raziel and He will reward you for it." She placed an arm over my shoulders and escorted me to the Blood Pit.

I was the only person in the Blood Pit but I could hear the voices from the corridors surrounding me as I clenched and relaxed my fist repeatedly stimulating the blood flow whilst the elderly woman massaged my arm. This hurt more than I'd expected it to because of my already tender wrist, the presentation already seemed like so long ago but in reality was only the day before.
"Kain has summoned her?"
"Why her? Why is she so special?"
"Do you think she'll be alright?"
The mix of concern and resentment was not easily ignored as I continued to fill the silver goblet in front of me. I must've looked more fatigued than I realised for the old woman began mopping my brow with a wet cloth to help keep me conscious.
After a little longer she took my arm in her leathery hands and began dabbing at the sacrificial wound with a wet sponge to clean it and then placed thin gauze over the top which she wrapped tightly as she chanted her magic, then she wrapped a jewelled white bandage over that. Before I left the chamber the woman made me drink sugar water again and gave me two spoonfuls of honey.
If things carry on like this I'll begin to look like a bee. I stood up and took hold of my offering and walked to meet my fate.

I was unsteady on my feet for a while but balance soon returned as I walked along the corridors. So many thoughts were going through my head that I can't even begin to say what they were. I know I wanted to cry, to run and hide from this moment, but there was no going back... There would be nowhere to run.
I finally reached Kain's bedchamber and stood before the doors unsure of what I should do next. I placed my blood filled goblet on the ground and used my hands to rub my face to remove my tears and in the hope of regaining colour to my cheeks, it was a trick I had witnessed Hecate use, I was sure that I must've looked as white as the ceremonial dress I still wore, another of Kain's requests was that I wore it. I ran my fingers through my hair and then picked up the goblet. I looked at its contents for a while.
Is it me, or is it morbid how they make us carry our own blood to them? I couldn't help but laugh at myself as I thought about it; maybe the blood loss was making me go a bit funny. I quickly composed myself and pushed open the grand door.

I entered the room slowly and looked around. Kain stood by a lounging chair not too far from the bed. He beckoned me forward and I walked to him, my head lowered so as not to look at his face. I knelt before him and offered my sacrifice. He took the goblet and I heard him put it on the nearby table.
"Look upon me human," that deep voice sent chills through me, I could not resist it. I looked into his eyes, "Hecate has been to me. She has told me a few things about you. Apparently you have an infatuation with my eldest son."
Oh no, I thought Why did she feel the need to come and tell him that? Surely that was the worst thing she could do. If nothing else I was astounded that he had spoken to me. It was not customary for the Gods to speak to us in this manner.
"Your Matriarch has also seen this from your thoughts, but she tells me that you've had many thoughts of me too. Is this true?" I did not know how to answer him, "You may speak freely." He insisted. I gulped back my anxiety and looked to the floor then I spoke to him openly for the first time.
"My Lord, my only desire is to serve you and your kind. That you have chosen me personally on two occasions is a great honour. I do not deny that I have harboured desires to know your touch since I saw you with Hecate… but my deepest longing for the past six years has been to know Raziel's touch. I worked hard to be the best that I could simply to serve him. But my Lord, I will gladly serve you in any manner you request."
"I did not give you permission to avert your eyes from me." The tone of his words made me look back to him. "As you must know I have no love for humans, even worshippers like yourself. Your longing for us to consume you, is no more noble than the fly who succumbs to the spiders web. But your devotion serves a purpose. Just because we are what we are does not mean that we do not have needs and desires, and sometimes those needs are easier met when the prey is given what it wants." He reached out his clawed hand to me. I hesitated for a moment before taking hold of it and he pulled me to my feet effortlessly. I had grown much since I was ten but he was still so much taller than I.
"What is your desire my Lord?" I asked in a whisper.
He reached to my neck and brushed my red hair away, exposing the flesh.
"I wish to know how your blood tastes directly from its source." He smiled lustfully at me, exposing his fangs, and then he bent himself towards me, slowly opening his mouth. I closed my eyes while I awaited the inevitable moment I had waited for for so long. I tilted my head to the side and drew in a quick breath. I felt his fangs graze my skin and I shuddered excitedly. I wanted Raziel… Oh how I wanted Raziel… But I wanted Kain too and now my God of Gods was standing before me, teasing my throat with his fangs which never penetrated my skin. My body tingled but I felt so confused, unable to tell if I truly wanted this, his presence was enchanting, intoxicating. For all my love for Raziel, I still wanted Kain to take me, to drink from me.
I could hear the door behind us opening but in that moment I did not care. I was so consumed with the images of what he would possibly do to me. Maybe he was enchanting me. If he was going to do to me what he did with Hecate…
Oh Gods let him take me, let him do things to me. My hormones raged inside me.
I heard the soft sound of cloven feet approach. I did not turn. I did not open my eyes. I could not bring myself to be drawn away from this glorious moment.
"Your pet is looking a little drained."
That voice! My eyes opened in disbelief. Kain withdrew from me and looked at the other figure who'd entered the room. The figure who now stood by the table holding the silver goblet filled with my blood. Raziel raised the vessel to his dark lips and drank my offering. He licked his lips after he'd finished. My heart was beating faster than I'd ever felt it before, so many differing emotions ran through me, I relished in the sight of him consuming my blood, but I felt guilty too, the man I loved had just seen me nearly give myself to another. I could've fainted…
"You were right Kain, her blood does taste sweeter than the others."
Kain laughed softly at Raziel, "I've told you before Raziel, I always get the best."
"So you take my higher concubine and her follower, throw them to the feral fledglings and yet you do not see fit to replace either of them?" his tone was sarcastic, his golden eyes turned to me and I looked away at the floor, "She is well trained." He commented.
I bit my lip. I did not know where to look or what I should do, I had never been alone with two vampires before. I had not been given permission to leave so I dared not move. Raziel walked over to me and placed a claw under my chin making me look at him. He was flawless.
Please don't let me pass out! I screamed internally. My heart pounded against my chest and my legs were starting to shake.
"I do believe she's trembling Kain. Are you sure she could survive an evening with us?"
Did he just say "us"? I must've looked comical for I was staring wide eyed at him and I'm sure my jaw had dropped. In fact Raziel started to laugh at me.
Kain suddenly grabbed Raziel's arm and forced him around to look at him.
"I do not offer favours easily Raziel. If your slut and her ward had not been so foolish, I would have laughed at your request for this girl." The tension was intense, it was physical, I could almost feel the oxygen being pulled from the room, "Just remember Raziel; this one is mine. If you damage her in any way, then our agreement no longer stands." They growled at each other, like two beasts fighting over a piece of meat. I backed away from them slowly, not wanting to draw attention to myself. Raziel's growls died away over the din of Kain's until he stopped snarling entirely.
"I understand, my Master." Raziel smiled at his creator, and Kain strangely smiled back at his eldest son. The growling between them had stopped and suddenly they both laughed and embraced each other like brothers. When they released their bond they turned and stared at me with hunger in their eyes.
"You may inspect her closer if you wish." Kain said as he turned to the table where the goblet was placed, he lifted it and swilled the remaining blood around and raised it to his face, inhaling the aroma as if it were a fine wine. Raziel took a step forward and looked at me.
"My Lord." I said softly and bowed my head to him then looked back into his lovely face. I would've gladly thrown myself to the ground to kiss his feet to thank him for coming to me now, for saving me from Kain if only for a few minutes.
"I remember you, your eyes... Anastasia... that's your name isn't it?" He began to circle me.
"Yes, my Lord."
"You were the young girl who ruined Dinah's dress." He stopped behind me and brushed my hair from my throat, "Womanhood suits you. I had no doubt that it would when I saw you those five years ago. From a pretty girl to a very attractive young woman."
I gulped as his hand touched my throat, I was lost for words and there was only one thing I could think to say, "Did you enjoy the presentation, my Lord?" Raziel laughed softly and walked around to face me again, his hand did not leave my throat as he completed the circle.
"I could not take my eyes off you," he said as he pushed a strand of hair from my face, "And like Kain, I do so enjoy owning the most beautiful of things."
I felt like my heart would stop beating.
Please don't let me die now, I begged my body, I want to hear more of his compliments. I would cast myself to the void with pleasure to hear him say more. I loved him with every breath I took and what I would've given to tell him so.
"Officially she is my property," Kain's voice came from behind me and I turned to see him there, "And as she is mine, I get the first taste." Kain advanced towards me and took hold of my neck in his great clawed hand.
Oh Gods, this is it... this is actually it. The moment I've waited for... I had been chosen. I was worthy. I closed my eyes and tilted my head. Kain did not hesitate, his fangs grazed my skin softly then bit down fiercely.
My flesh burnt and I gasped in a short breath which escaped my lips as a moan. I felt Kain's free arm encircle the small of my back and he gently lowered me onto the bed. I grabbed the silky sheets under me as his body rubbed against mine, he was heavy but it felt good to have him on top of me. His fangs penetrated deep into my neck and I could feel my hot blood escaping me. The feeling of his tongue against my throat was simply divine and strangely I found myself praying. I whispered the words but they screamed in my head.
"Oh Gods..." I thank you... "I worship you..." I sacrifice myself to you... "Please don't..." Let me die... "I will serve you..." Forever... Amen.
I felt Kain lift himself off me and I watched as he wiped my blood from his mouth and looked down at me on his bed. He placed one of his arms under my body and lifted me forward. I felt ever so light.
"She tastes divine, Raziel," I looked at the lieutenant who stood patiently by the bed, his hungry eyes staring at my blood stained neck, "Come, share her with me."
Raziel smiled and he knelt beside me, taking my arm in his clawed hand and he pressed my wrist to his lips. His gently removed my decorative bandage and I felt his cold, dark lips parting and his tongue started to caress my already broken skin. I almost did not feel his fangs at first for he brought them down so gently, but once my pulse began to push my blood into his perfect mouth I felt his control subsiding. He tore at my wrist while Kain who held me tightly round my waist regained his hold on my throat. I closed my eyes and breathed in shallow breaths. I threw my head back in ecstasy as I gasped, my head rested on Kain's shoulder and I surrendered myself to both of them.

All I could think in that wonderful moment while these two great vampires used me to sustain themselves was how proud my father would have been.

You may think this was the end for me, but my dears how would yours truly be telling the tale if I had died then. How would I be lying in this bed years later, reminiscing on the events that led up to this point? No, they did not kill me, although I would've gladly let them if it would please them.
My last memory of that night was falling into darkness and waking up in my new bed within the concubines' bed chamber. The soft sheets and comfy pillow felt so good against my tired and blood drained limbs. I smiled to myself and smothered my face into the pillow.
"Ana?" It was Selena's voice.
"Hmm...?" I answered, still smiling as I turned my head to where her voice was coming from.
"You ok? You're deathly pale." She queried and placed her hand on my forehead.
"Oh Selena... it was wonderful. Both of them... together, drinking from me."
"What are you saying?"
"Kain and... Raziel." I whispered the names in a happy sigh and looked at my best friend.
"Two vampires!" She cried, then slapped her hand over her mouth and spun round to make sure no one was in the room with us. She removed her hand and leaned closer to me to whisper, "Two vampires?"
"Oh yes," I replied, "And maybe they'll ask for me again tonight. I want them to do more than just drink from me this time."
"They shall do no such thing," my friend protested, "You haven't seen yourself Ana. You'll need at least two weeks before you'll be ready for that. Do you know that Kain himself had to carry you back here?"
A short laugh came from me, "Oh my, if only Dinah were here. She would've hated that. My first night with Kain and Raziel and I come back drained but alive, in the arms of our God."
Selena sighed in defeat; nothing was going to bring down my good mood now.