Lexi sat on her bed deep in thought. It was 10 o'clock at she couldn't sleep. Nausea was her constant companion these days. Her dad had brought her the pen and the paper though. Now she was busy trying to compose a letter to someone she hadn't even met yet. She felt like she had to do Dee Jay's first because if she got real ill real fast then she might not have time to write the rest and she needed him to know that although she never met him he was important to her.

It was hard writing this, I mean did she sort of give sisterly advice? If so what? About girls? That could turn embarrassing! About their parents? Possibly but would they change if she died become different people in 10-15 years time. She had no idea what to say to this boy. It was really weird. I mean what type of music would he like? TV shows? Sports? Would he be shy and quiet like dad or loud and out going like mum?

She just decided to switch off her brain and write the first thing that came into her head and hopefully she wouldn't sound like a absolute fool!

To Bump, aka Dee Jay aka Daniel (Delete as applicable lol)

Ah if you are reading this then you are born - obviously. That's one quirk of mine stating the obvious. You'll already know of me from mum and dad no doubt but I'm your big sister Lexi. Alexis Marie Trevanion Queen of the whole world! I suppose I'll tell you a little about me huh. I'll try not to bore you too much! Well I'm the double of our dad as you probably know from pictures. I've got mum's passion and spirit. Never say die, never let 'em see you sweat. Fight for the ones you love and protect your family at all costs. That last one makes me sound like dad huh? I wonder how old you are. Hmmmm sound I censor this letter? Haha. I can't see mum and dad reading this before you. I'd better be careful of what I say or they'll kill me if I lead you astray huh? They probably think I won't be stupid in it, don't they know me at all? I guess you don't know me. I'm sorry about that. Truly. I'm gonna fight this as hard as I can but it's kinda hard sometimes.

You're a little belter you know. I felt you kick when mum was 6 months gone. Talk about wow! It was the first time I realised that you were really there. Sure I knew mum was having a baby but feeling you kicked it sorta made it all the more real! Your all they ever wanted so you better be treating them right or stuff will start disappearing from your room. I bet you got rubbish taste in music like Ethan. He better have taken you under his wing by the way. Tell you what I'll ask mum to keep a hold of my CD's for you. Word of advice. If you wanna drive Ethan mad play him Darren Hayes. (But not neverland that one is awful for him!) yeah anyway Darren Hayes he'll have a coronary.

Wonder if dad had a nickname for you or if they've just stuck wi Dee Jay. Mine was sunshine. I liked it even though it does seem pretty cheesy. He is a beltin' dad isn't he. Tell him you care huh. Everyday if you can I know it's different for boys and their dads but I know he loves you. Me and dad had our fallouts and one of my biggest regrets is that the times I fought with him and said all this mean and nasty stuff I should have been telling him I love him. Coz I really do! I suppose when your ill all this stuff gets put into perspective. Look at me going all mushy on you. I'll give myself a slap upside the head for you. You so better be saying no! Oh your saying yes? Ok then ….ow! Ha-ha x

Mums actually pregnant with you at the moment so I don't know what you look like. I can see you looking like dad for some reason. He completely dominated with me so I'll base it on that! So £20 says you look like dad. If you do you owe me a bunch of flowers. If you look like mum you'll find a IOU in here for £20, ha-ha.

I have no idea what to say to you, you know. I mean your like this tiny baby at the moment. Nice and safe and warm. No worries until of course your born and you'll cry and stink up the place! And have dad breaking his neck tripping over toys. Sorry if I offended you over the stink the place up comment. Actually if you knew me you'd know I partially meant it. In the most loving possible way of course! ha-ha x.

And finally. You want any dirt on mum and dad go to Auntie Shauna and Auntie Missy. They have the funniest stories. And the jokes they used to play on each other will have you laughing your head off. I'm gonna miss them actually. Give them a kiss for me will you? I'm gonna miss all of you. I'm gonna miss not getting to know you especially. Kiss everyone for me Dee Jay. I guess I gotta go now. This is Lexi T signing off.

Love ya bump hugs and kisses.

Your big sis Lexi xoxoxoxox

Ps my apologies if the doctors got it wrong and your actually a Danielle x

Jamestown Story - Goodbye I'm Sorry

Time has run out, for me.

Everything's distant and I don't know what to believe.

It's so hard, lost in the world confusion.

And I need to leave, for a while.

Life is so meaningless, there is nothing worth a smile.

So goodbye, I'll miss you.

A/N there will be letters for other family members later in the story so keep reading please x