I had fun with this chapter (more so than I usually do) and now I want to take my Edward home with me. How bad is that?

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BPOV

"Will I need my jacket?" I asked Edward as we were leaving his apartment, not knowing where he was taking me. On the one hand I wanted to ask, but on the other I wanted to wait to find out on his terms.

"Definitely grab your jacket. We'll be outside and it will be chillier than usual where we are going."

He walked over to the hall closet, opened it up and grabbed some blankets. Turning back to me he smiled and said, "Are you ready to go?"

I was a bit puzzled by the blankets but had no reason to distrust Edward's intentions, and I had had a very pleasant evening thus far, even with the rather uncomfortable question - which I thought I handled fairly well.

Edward walked me out of his apartment to the elevators and pressed the button for the parking garage. We stood in comfortable silence, but the closer we got to the parking garage, the more I thought about being pressed up against his car, being ravished with his mouth and tongue. I could feel myself getting warm, heat pooling between my legs, my breathing getting heavier.

"Bella, are you okay?" Edward asked with concern.

I shook my head slightly, snapping out of my thoughts, "Hmmmm? What Edward?"

"Are you okay?" he asked again. "You look a little flushed."

Well shit! I can't control my body for a second canI?I smiled, "I'm great Edward."

The elevator stopped at the parking garage and Edward bowed and offered me his elbow. "Madam, may I escort you to my chariot?" he said playfully with a smile.

I giggled and curtsied, "Why yes, kind sir, I would be honored for you to escort me to your chariot. Please do lead the way," I took his elbow and we walked to his car. He opened the door and helped me into my seat and closed my door behind me. That had been the first time that a man had, one: walked me to a car, and two: opened a car door for me and helped me in. It was by far, in my books, an extremely romantic thing to do and the gesture completely turned me on. My hormones were already raging and now they were steaming ahead at full speed.

Edward made his way around the car and got into the driver's side, starting the car and pulling out of the garage. He drove us to Seahurst Park, just north of Three Tree Point and about ten miles from Seattle. Seahurst Park was a beach currently undergoing restoration to preserve it in its more natural state. They had been removing invasive plant species, improving trails and upgrading facilities. Edward took me to a part of the beach that simply took my breath away.

He came around the car and opened my door, holding out his hand to help me out. Once I was out of the car, he went around to the trunk to get the blankets that we had brought from his apartment. I wrapped my arms around my body. Being this close to the water made it at least twenty degrees colder and I was shivering from the chill in the air. My light jacket was definitely not going to be enough to keep me warm. I heard the trunk lid close and saw Edward walking back toward me with a smile on his face.

Holding out his hand, he looked at me and said, "Are you ready?"

I reached out and grasped my hand in his, "Absolutely." I was hoping he couldn't tell that my body was shaking from the cold, but no such luck.

"Bella, you should have told me you were cold. Here."

He unfolded one of the blanket he was carrying and wrapped it around my shoulders, enveloping me in it, and instead of dropping his arm, he left it resting on my shoulder. It felt good; it felt right. I felt warmth spread through my body from his touch, through the layers of cloth. I wanted to feel him on my bare skin, I wanted his heat on mine.

I turned my head and glanced to my right, looking up at him, a half smile on my face. "Thank you."

He stopped walking, yet kept looking at me; reaching over with his right hand he brushed the left side of my cheek with the back of his knuckles, leaned down and lightly kissed me. Pulling back up, he said, "You're welcome, Bella." My hands were hanging at my sides motionless. I was stunned, literally at a loss for words. I was putty in his hands; that small kiss was more significant than any hot steamy kiss could have ever been. In that moment I wanted him more than I ever had.

"You know, you're letting me do that more and more, Bella and you do realize that you're not objecting. If you keep not objecting I'm going to keep doing it. I'm giving you fair warning." He dropped his hands from me and turned so he was completely facing me, moving in closer. The smile he gave me sent my heart was racing, it was a slow secret smile and it sent shivers to my toes. We were inches apart, and I could think was that I wanted him to touch me. "I'm going to do it again Bella."

Oh please do it again Edward, please...

He reached up and threaded his hand in my hair, tilting my head back, and my body shuddered, knowing what was coming next. Slowly, he lowered his head. I thought he would take my lips but instead, his head dipped lower and he kissed my neck softly, his lips parted, his tongue darting out and wetting my skin. I shivered and moaned under my breath as he made his way up my neck up toward my ear. He took my earlobe into his mouth, gently biting it and releasing before lifting his mouth and lightly breathing on the shell of my ear, his tongue peaked out slightly and its tip tracing the contours. I could feel myself getting wet. The blanket slipped from my shoulders as I lifted my hands and wrapped them around Edward's neck, threading my fingers into the back of his hair, grasping it. I pulled his head back, looking in his piercing eyes for a split second before crushing his mouth to mine, for once in my life commanding a kiss. I covered his mouth hungrily, urgently and he returned my kisses, leaving my mouth burning with fire. I slowly succumbed and let Edward take over, dominating the kiss. He reached up and placed his hand on my jaw, forcing my mouth open as he thrust his tongue in, kissing me with a hunger, an urgency. With both hands cupping my face, he continued to assault me with his drugging kiss, the taste of him mixed with my own, darting and thrusting deep into the recesses of my mouth. My emotions were whirling and skidding, radiating outward. I could feel things stirring inside me that I had never felt before; I would have gladly stripped bare right here in the parking lot and let Edward take me in that very moment. This was something I have never felt with James, never once in the entire ten years we had been married; it was a testament to the failure we truly were. Slowly, Edward started placing smaller softer kisses on my lips, running his hands over my hair, down my arms; finally, he placed his hands under my chin and placed one last chaste kiss on my lips and tilted my head up so he could look at me.

The look on his face was one of affection, Edward smiling lightly as he said in a soft voice, "Bella, I don't think I could stand the thought of anyone else doing that to you." He looked me directly in the eyes next and what he said completely floored me: "I don't want to share. I'm selfish; I want you to myself."

I was completely stunned. I knew Edward wanted me - it was no secret he was pursuing me - but I had no idea he felt this strongly. It made me completely giddy inside because Edward stirred something in me that I had never felt in my life. He made me feel passionate, sexy, wanted, needed, and strong, and I wanted him - oh God, I wanted him! I had never before wanted anyone the way I wanted him. If I were smart, I would stop and think about this rationally, but I didn't want to be rational; I wanted to be reckless, to let loose, to be free. I wanted Edward. I wanted him to fill me, to fill my void and make me feel whole again, like a woman.

I bit my lower lip and tipped my head to the side, peering at him curiously before replying in a soft voice, "Edward... As much as I want to say yes, and I really do want to say yes..." I took a deep breath before continuing, "I'm a screw up Edward. Things may be good now, but eventually all the shiny newness will wear off and I'll just screw things up. Look what happened with James and I. No matter how hard I tried, I just couldn't get it right." I looked up at him sadly, "I know there's something here," I said, gesturing between us with my hands, "but I'm terrified that if I give in, it will all go away and then where will I be? I'm selfish too, Edward..."

"Come here."

Edward grabbed my hand and pulled me toward the beach, the two of us trudging through the sand until he found the spot he wanted. Fanning out a blanket he spread it out on the ground and motioned for me to sit down while he unfolded another blanket and sat beside me wrapping the extra blanket around us both.

He grabbed my face in both of his hands, staring intently at me as if he was trying to convince me solely by the look in his eyes. I had never seen him look so determined before. "Just listen to me, okay? Don't say anything. I want you to hear me out."

If I had learned anything in my ten year marriage, it was patience and the art of listening. I would at least give him the benefit of the doubt. I licked my lips, pulling my bottom lip between my teeth and closing my eyes briefly before replying, "Okay."

Dropping his hands from my face, he grabbed my hands and faced me, the blankets still wrapped around us, "First of all, you are entirely too hard on yourself. I don't know a lot about your relationship with your ex-husband, but I do know that it takes two, and it can never be entirely one person's fault for any failure when it comes tomarriage. And from what little I have gotten, and forgive me if I'm overstepping here, James was a complete asshole that treated you like shit.

"Second, you deserve to be happy and you deserve to be with someone that makes you happy. I'm just thankful that you reciprocate my feelings, because if I had to work any harder to get you where I have you, I'd be one extremely exhausted man," he said earnestly, and at that, I had to I crack a smile. I'd given him a run for his money. My stubbornness was well known on the Swan side of the family.

"Look, All I'm asking for is a chance okay? I'm not in this to hurt you. I think what we have is right and real; it merits exploring further. Trust in yourself Bella, trust in me; better yet, trust in us. You are such a strong determined woman; how can you not trust in this with all you have accomplished in the last six months? How can you not see the truth in yourself, in me?"

He searched my face earnestly, looking for some sort of sign, I was searching for a sign of my own, in his eyes, some sort of falter, something that told me this was a mistake, I could find none. My head screamed NO, but my heart screamed YES. I took a deep breath: I was going follow my heart... well, I was at least going to try.

"Okay."

"Okay?" Edward asked, sounding surprised.

"Do you want me to take it back? Because I can," I retorted, sounding like a smart ass.

"No, no!" he said laughing and taking my hand kissing it. "I was just expecting an entirely different reaction." He pulled me in to his arms, hugging me. I wrapped my arms around his waist and laid my head on his chest reveling in the warmth and the comfort of this man, for once not feeling revulsion, or the compulsion to walk away.

"So what exactly does this mean?" I asked trying to get some sort of clarification out of our relationship.

"It means that now I can do this," he pulled back from our hold, lifted my chin, and kissed me again, taking my bottom lip between his lips, "...any time I want," Edward said as his face split into a wide grin.

"Mmmmmm," I said as I closed my eyes, pulling my bottom lip into my mouth, tasting him, a slight smile starting to play about my lips. "I could get used to that rather quickly." Damn I really could, but I don't know if my sex drive could take it...

"I plan on doing it often, so prepare yourself," Edward said with a devilish grin on his face.

The next thing I knew he was turned toward me and moving in closer. I leaned back, but the further I leaned the closer he got. My insides started fluttering and my heart started beating hard and fast; I was literally leaning back, propped up on my elbows with Edward hovering over me, holding himself up on his right forearm while his left reached up and brushed the hair back from my forehead.

Edward leaned down and placed a kiss on my right shoulder, lightly grazing it with his teeth. Lifting his head, he placed small kisses up my collarbone until he reached my neck. My head fell back at the contact and I shivered, not from the cold but from the feeling of his lips on my skin. They were a whisper on my neck, ghosting across my flesh, making me quiver in excitement. A sound, that was between sigh and a moan slipped through my lips as he flicked out his tongue, wetting my skin and placing soft kisses across it up toward my ear. "Ungh, oh...Edwaaaard, "With the blanket still wrapped around us, he gently eased me all the way down so I was lying on my back and continued his gentle assault, with his lips moving from my neck to my ear.

"Bella," he whispered, "you feel so right in my arms, like you belong here."

Reclaiming my lips, he crushed me to him and sent shock waves of pleasure through me. His kiss was urgent, possessive and full of heated desire that I had never experienced before. His body covering mine, hands fisted in my hair, his tongue tangled with mine, telling me how much he wanted me, darting in and out of my mouth. Briefly, he would pull back, kissing my lips, his teeth nipping at my lower lip, teasing me just enough and then coming back for more.

"Oh God, Bella" he said, lifting his head and lowering it to my neck, biting a path down to my collar bone, moving lower.

His right hand shook free of the blanket and slid down, brushing the side of my breast. I arched in response, gasping at even the brief almost contact. I could feel my nipples harden and heat pool like warm honey in my core; he was awakening a response from within me that had been so deeply buried, I had feared I would never return and I was reveling in it. It would be so easy, just to push up my skirt, move my panties aside and let him bury himself in me, pulsating, throbbing, and finally pushing me over the edge. I let out a soft whimper, thinking about it.

Panting, head thrown back and my hands fisted I finally spoke, "E-Edward? I- Oh, I like that..." He was nibbling at my nipples through my shirt, I was lost...

Lifting his head Edward looked up with passionate eyes, "Did you say something?"

He was just as lost as I was. If I did not speak up now, this would go too far and our first time would be wrapped in a blanket on beach at Seahurst Park. As passionate and romantic as Edward was being, this was not what I had in mind, and if I was being honest with myself, this was moving a little too fast for me and I needed a bit more time for this step. I wanted him - lord knows I wanted him and could think of nothing else - but I needed to be sure this was right. I had already taken a huge step tonight; I had made the first commitment with another man besides James in over ten years. If I was gonna make this work, I needed to do it right. I hoped Edward would understand.

"I...I-God Edward as much as I want you and as much as I want this, I think we need to slow down." Oh lord...he's giving me a look, and it's not a good one.

"Bella, I'm not sure I understand what you're saying. Well, let me rephrase: I get what you're saying, I just don't get why."

Oh God, he is going to be mad, "Edward... First, even though I did agree to see only you, this is technically our first date, and secondly, I don't want our first time to be on a beach, in the sand." I grimaced when I was done, ducking my head. I was embarrassed, and afraid I had screwed up before we had even started.

"Bella, look at me," he said, as he placed his hand under my chin, lifting my face so he could look in my eyes as he made his next statement, "I would neverpressure you into something like that before you were ready, and as to the beach, as wonderful a time I have had out here with you, I have no desire to get sand in all my, ah... parts if you know what I mean. I'd just as soon keep enjoying the pleasure of your company the way I have been, if you don't mind? Or, if you would rather, we can talk some more. I find you completely fascinating and can't seem to get enough."

"God, I feel stupid," I muttered under my breath, my cheeks growing heated with embarrassment.

"There's nothing to feel stupid about Bella. You should never feel embarrassed or frightened to tell me anything. You can always talk to me okay?" Edward said, with a smile on his face.

Edward dropped the blanket from around his shoulders and stood up. He reached down and gave me his hand, "You want to go for a walk? They cleared a lot of the brush for several miles and there is some beautiful beach up ahead. Come on."

I lifted my hand and grabbed his, allowing him to pull me up. He wrapped the blanket snugly around me to keep me warm, and then wrapped his arm around me; I laid my head on his shoulder as we walked, evoking the intimacy and closeness we were sharing. I allowed myself a small smile, knowing Edward could not see me, I could not remember a time I had ever been so happy or comfortable with a man and I was finding it just a bit hard to believe that it was all real; everything felt so surreal.

"Edward? Can I ask you something? I need you to be completely honest with me."

Edward nodded his head, "Of course Bella, I'll always be honest with you. What do you want to know?" he asked me earnestly.

I pushed ahead with my question, feeling the wind blow through my hair off the water; instead of cold, it felt refreshing, "I know you said we felt right and real, that our relationship merited exploring further. To trust in myself, in us? What I want to know though Edward is, why me? What sets me apart from everyone else? To me, I'm just boring, screwed up Bella and I don't understand..." I stopped for a moment turning to him, "This...happy..us?" I gestured back and forth between us with my hands, "is something that would never happen to me. I'm just not that..." I trailed off, but unable to find the right words to complete myself, I just shrugged.

Edward took a deep breath in and breathed out his nose. Closing his eyes, he leaned his forehead against mine briefly before lifting it and placing a kiss to my forehead. He turned and we continued walking, and after a moment he answered, "Bella, you are the first woman I have ever met that has ever been completely true and real to herself. You have beliefs, convictions, values - and they're not shallow and 're not made up of bits and pieces of a story that you want to be. You're real, and you are who you are because that's how you're made, and there's no changing that. You have been hammered and beaten down -" I stopped walking, shocked that he would say that. "Bella, you have overcome so many odds and have not let it get you down; you came out on top, you won. You have silent courage that's easy to miss but so beautiful to see; would you like me to keep going?"

I started walking again, trying to keep the tears out of my voice; what he said had rocked me. No one had ever said anything so beautiful or generous on my behalf before and I had no idea that anyone could see me that way. "No, that's enough...for now," I turned my head and looked up at him with a soft smile on my face. "Thank you for answering."

"I said before, I will always answer your questions Bella; never worry about asking me anything."

"So, you and Emmett are brothers, but you don't have the same last name?" I asked, hoping I was not prying too much.

Edward barked out a short laugh, "Yes, my father Carlisle married Emmett's mother, Esme, twenty years ago and I acquired a brother. I have to say, as far as ready made families go, I got rather lucky. I couldn't ask for a better mother; I was actually adopted by my father myself, so Esme is the only mother I have ever known. I'm lucky to have them all." Edward reached up with his free hand and ran his fingers through his hair, "I have a lot of interesting childhood stories to catch you up on, and if you ever need to hold anything over Emmett's head, you just let me know."

I giggled at the thought, which made me think of Rose and I started laughing even harder.

"Care to let me in on your little joke?"

When I had calmed down enough to breathe without hyperventilating, I regaled Edward with the entire Rose/Miley caught on tape story and by the time I was done we were both doubled over in laughter all over again. It seemed we both had stuff on the happy couple, and Rose was always giving me shit for one thing or another. I couldn't wait to start using my ammunition, and with Edward in cahoots it would be even more fun.

We turned around on the beach and started heading back the way we came when Edward suddenly started firing questions at me, "I hope you don't mind but there's a great many things I want to know, so I'm just going to ask, okay?

"Ummm, Okay? Shoot." I still was not sure what he could ask me that could be so interesting.

"When's your birthday?"

I answered, "September 13th"

"Favorite color?"

"Ah..." I laughed, "that changes daily, based on my mood."

"Fair enough," he said, "favorite movie?"

"Ohhh, hands down, 'Independence Day', I could be flipping through the channels on TV and if I see it on, I'll always stop and watch the rest of it. I love it; sorry...is that cheesy?' I said laughing.

"Not at all. I happen to agree; it's a great movie, not my favorite. Mine happens to be 'Blade Runner' - it's a classic - but 'Independence Day is up there on my list of all time faves."

"What were you like as a child?"

"Oh, you would ask me something like that! You are an evil man, Edward Cullen; you just wait until it's my turn," I said as I narrowed my eyes, glaring at him with false apprehension. "Unlike now," I said grinning, almost laughing at myself, "I was quite the little nerd; I was always the girl in the dress and funny barrettes that talked to herself. You could find me on the playground at recess with my nose buried in a book, or in the library when there was no more recess doing the same thing. I never hung with a lot of people until Rose and Alice came along and until Alice, I never had much sense of style. To this day I still ponder why they befriended me so easily. What about you?"

He looked at me and grinned, "I was much the same, but without the book, I did not acquire that taste until a bit later on in life, I'm afraid. I was pretty quiet unless I was with Emmett. Unfortunately, I was tall and lanky so I stuck out like a sore thumb, but I tried to keep to myself. For the most part I just hung with Emmett. I made good grades, graduated at the top of my class, and remained fairly inconspicuous until the tenth grade when the whole DJ debacle happened; after that there was no hiding, any longer. I took it in stride and rode it out, but if I could have laid low, at least for a couple more years, I think I would have preferred it, especially after all that's happened now. I don't get much peace anymore."

"I can imagine not, with you and Jessica's faces plastered all over Seattle," I said, not meaning to let the disdain come out in my voice with the sound of her name.

"About Jessica, she's just a -"

"No need to explain, Edward, I understand you work with her, and I also understand how she is. I knew the day at Jam Fest."

"You did? How? She was so nice."

He had an odd expression on his face. We had reached the parking lot and had stopped at the car. I could tell he was debating whether or not to continue the conversation inside while we were driving, or to keep talking outside. I turned to face him as he leaned back against the car, wrapping the blanket all the way around us both with both arms.

"Edward, she saw us kissing on the side of the stage, and when I came out, she made some pretty rude remarks. She was not trying to hide anything. It's obvious she wants you, and it's also obvious she will do whatever it takes to get you." I was so sure of this as I said it.

"The tequila shots..." he trailed off, grinning.

Shit! I was busted. Well I was already in it for the long haul, so I may as well just admit it, "Yeah, she came over and it really stirred something in me. By that time I had pretty much made up my mind concerning you." Edward cocked an eyebrow at me, like he was telling me what? you made me work for all this? "Don't give me that look, Edward; I said it pretty much, not that I had; anyway there was no way I was letting that psycho bitch sink her claws in you. Something about her just twists me. I knew you couldn't be rude, but that didn't mean I couldn't." I smiled, "Besides, I didn't see you complaining."

"Uh, no, nothing from the complaint department here; feel free to do body shots off me any time you feel the need. As a matter a fact, any time you feel the need to experiment you just let me know." He gave me a wicked grin and wiggled his eyebrows.

"Perv," I replied, giggling.

"Oh, Bella, what am I going to do with you?" He asked, leaning his head on mine and rocking it back and forth as he rubbed his hands up and down on my back.

"I'm sure you'll figure out something...soon," I said with a hidden meaning I knew he caught.

"As much as I don't want to do this, I know I need to get you home. It's only going to get colder and it has to be at least two in the morning. Rose will have my ass and until she and Alice get used to our new relationship, I'd rather not cross her." He sighed.

"Not only are you handsome Edward, but you're smart too," I said as he opened my door for me to get in.

************

The car ride took about twenty-five minutes, give or take; I was beginning to think Edward was deliberately driving slowly just so he had more time with me. On the outside, I was trying to be calm and collected, but on the inside I was a giddy school girl that could not wait to share my evening with my girlfriends, telling them every juicy detail. I was so happy I was delirious; deep down I knew it would wear off, but now, I didn't care. I had Edward and he wanted me, just me, not my cooking or my cleaning...no strings. He found me attractive and sexy, he liked my intellect and my convictions, what I stood for and that meant more to me than I cared to admit.

We pulled up in front of the condo too soon for my liking and Edward got out of the car and rounded the front to open my door for me, helping me out. He walked me to the front door and wrapped his arms around me, pulling me close.

"I don't want to let go Bella." He buried his face in my hair, his hands splayed wide on my back.

"I know exactly how you feel. I could stand here like this all night. I feel so right here, in your arms. You were right; it does feel like I belong." I was getting sappy, sentimental, which was NOT me. God what was wrong with me? Oh yeah, Edward... that was it.

He pulled back and gave me a gentle kiss on the lips, "I have a benefit coming up next weekend on Saturday night, for a charity function that the station sponsors every year; it's a really big deal. I would be honored if you would accompany me?"

"Black tie, I presume then?"

"Yes, do you have anything to wear?" he asked me worriedly.

"No, but that gives me an excuse to make Alice happy and take her shopping, so don't worry about it." I gave him an excited smile. I had never been to a black tie affair before and the thought of it was actually rather exciting.

"I had a wonderful evening tonight Edward, and thank you for everything," I told him, giving him my most sincere look.

"Bella, it's I who should be thanking you. You have given me a gift, the gift of yourself, and I promise not to screw this up." Parting his lips slightly he lowered his head to mine and kissed me softly, taking my upper lip between his, peeking his tongue out and wetting my lip before pulling back and taking my lower lip between his and doing the same. He pulled back again and lightly traced my lips with his tongue before lowering his mouth to mine and kissing me full on the lips, his tongue sinking into my mouth, snaking with mine, tasting me, twisting and dancing in a sensual way in my mouth, telling me once again how much he wanted me. With his hand holding the back of my head, he continued to assault my senses, taking the kiss deeper, pressing me closer to him. I could feel his hardness against my thigh; it was stirring things in me again and I could feel the heaviness in my breathing start to thicken. Pulling back, Edward placed one, two, three small kisses on my lips before looking me in the eyes.

"Can I see you tomorrow Bella? Can I come by?" He looked anxious, like I would say no.

"Well, since we are technically 'exclusive' now you coming by is really something that would become the norm, right?" I said with a grin.

"Exactly!" He replied enthusiastically.

"Well, I go in at four, so anytime before that, or you can always visit me at the bar," I said with a smile. I never wanted James to visit me at the bar, but Edward, that was a wonderful change of pace and I would welcome him with open arms.

"Tomorrow it is then," he said grabbing my hand and kissing it. He reached up one last time and kissed me on the lips, like he couldn't get enough, and I couldn't blame him, I couldn't either; I smiled.

"Good night Edward," I turned and slid my key into the lock to open the door, happier than I had been in years. I stepped into the house and turned to shut the door, leaving it open just a crack so I could watch him leave.

"Good night Bella." he said with a sexy grin, as he turned to leave. I shut the door behind me and locked the door, turning I pressed my back to it, my face breaking out in to the biggest smile it had seen in years.

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