Not going to lie guys this is a major chapter! Several of the events you've been asking me for are about to happen that lead up to the grand finale in the next chapter. So I hope you have fun with this one :) Happy ending is only a few thousand words away! I must warn you that I'm about to head back to school so I'm going to be a little busier than I have been.
One Note: I do suggest listening to Enrique Iglesias's Addicted when you read Chuck's scene. I was listening to it when I wrote and something about the writing fits the grove of the song.
To my reviewers: GGfanficfan09, CrazyBitch10, SouthernBelle88, tvrox12,LitPrincess2787, ggff-fan, CarolinaGirl21, LovelyLydia, ana-12, CBBW3words8letters, annablake, and Taiyo To Tsuki No Megami. You guys are absolutely incredible. Thanks so much for the reviews, I adore them!
Special thanks to ggff-fan for beta'ing this chapter for me. 3 you!
Disclaimer: I don't own Gossip Girl. But I do own a mild obsession for Vitamin Water just like the show.
Saturday, May 16, 2009 - Brooklyn, NYC
Sighing slightly, Nate walked into the Humphrey's Art Gallery. He knew Vanessa was here working . He just wanted to get this over with. Luckily the café was empty so he wouldn't have to deal with breaking up with her in public. This was ridiculous, what had he gotten himself into in the first place hooking up with Vanessa to make Jenny jealous; it was all a bad idea from the start. Now, if he wanted to move forward with Jenny he had to end things here first. "Hey." He spoke, mustering up all his confidence as he came and sat before Vanessa at the bar.
"Nate!" Vanessa spoke, a mega-watt smile appearing on her features. "I'm so glad you stopped by! Today's been so slow and I've missed you."
Nate couldn't shake the feeling that she was almost too happy to see him. It weirded him out. "I was actually hoping we could sit down and talk for a while."
Vanessa continued smiling brightly. "Of course. It's almost time for me to close up anyway, twenty minutes early won't hurt." She said as she walked around the bar and flipped the sign on the window. "So what'd you want to talk about?" She asked, taking a seat next to him on the bar. Immediately, she reached over and placed a hand on his. "Gosh, I feel like I haven't seen you in forever."
She was making this easier by the minute, Nate thought to himself, slowly extracting his hand from under hers. "Actually, that's kind of what I wanted to talk to you about."
Vanessa's brow furrowed and the smile slipped slowly from her face. "What's going on Nate?"
Nate could hear the distress in her voice and whilst he didn't want to cause her pain, it was time this ended. "I don't really think we should be seeing each other any more."
"What?" Vanessa asked, alarm filling her voice. "Why?"
This was the part that Nate was dreading the most, he knew this would likely ruin whatever friendship Jenny and Vanessa had left. "I'm still in love with Jenny." He spoke directly, he at least owed her a straight answer.
The fire that filled Vanessa made her want to scream and throw things but she forced herself to remain calm. After all this time, all the love letters and the devotion from her and the lying and cheating from Jenny, he still only wanted Jenny. "Get out." She said, her voice dangerously low.
"I'm sorry." Nate said as he stood from his bar stool. Walking from the coffee shop he could hear Vanessa crying. He wished there were something he could do to comfort her but he knew that right now the best thing for everyone was if he simply walked away. As he left the Gallery, he couldn't shake the feeling that there was only one place he wanted to be right now, so he picked up his phone and dialed.
As Jenny saw the caller id on her phone, she couldn't help the rush of happiness she felt. "Hey Nate, what's up?" She asked, doing her best to keep her voice nonchalant.
Nate inhaled contentedly, just the sound of her voice made him happy. "Not much, where are you?"
"I'm on my way to Serena and Eric's. Dan's going to be out all night working on this thing with Blair and Marcus. . ." Jenny said, trailing off as Nate realized that she'd just said Marcus.
"What!" Nate asked bursting in. "What do you mean Blair and Marcus? What's he doing in New York?"
Jenny found herself giggling slightly at Nate's reaction. The only one that had been stronger was Serena's. "Don't worry, Blair's fine, everything is fine. They are just doing a little media blitz to announce their split. And apparently Marcus has a new girlfriend, one everyone appears to already know."
Nate breathed a sigh of relief, the last thing they needed was Marcus back in their lives. "Who's stupid enough to get involved with Marcus?"
"Jocelyn Forbes." Jenny said a smug smile on her face because she knew that once more Nate was going to be thrown for a loop.
Nate shook his head. "No way. Joss would never go for . . . " Nate trailed off, considering the situation. "Okay, so maybe Jocelyn would." He spoke, beginning to see that Marcus and Jocelyn could be the perfect match; each of them had a twisted sort of perversion about them in the way they looked at other people; besides they'd both always found themselves to be outside of the rules. "So Sunshine's hooked herself a Prince huh? I hope she knows what she's doing."
Jenny found herself nodding on the other end of the line. She didn't actually know Jocelyn personally but she knew enough to know that Nate was probably right. Jocelyn was enough like Blair to be able to handle Marcus. "From what I heard, I think she knows exactly what she's doing. Dan says they're cute together."
Nate found himself rolling his eyes. He didn't want to imagine Marcus being cute with anyone. "Hey, do you mind if I come over?" He asked, knowing he was changing the subject.
"That's fine. We're ordering in Thai food." Jenny spoke, trying her best to contain her excitement that Nate actually wanted to be around her.
Nate smiled. "Sounds perfect. I'll see you in a bit."
As Jenny hung up the phone, she couldn't resist doing a slight happy dance in the middle of the street. Things were finally getting back to the way they were supposed to be.
Saturday, May 16, 2009 - Central Park, NYC
Finally arriving at the entrance to Central Park, nearest to Tavern on the Green Blair checked her compact quickly, not failing to notice the car in the reflection once more; she just couldn't shake the feeling that she was being followed. "Here goes nothing." She said towards Dan before hurrying out of the cab with him hot on her heels.
As they stepped out, Marcus was there, holding the door and assisting her; a bright flash of light alerted her to Aaron's presence as well. Going along with the plan they'd rehearsed Blair wrapped her arms around Marcus's neck and hugged him, smiling all the while. Pulling away she kissed his check before leaning back in to another hug, while Aaron continued to snap photographs from all angles. They began to walk through Central Park, smiling and talking amicably with one another though not touching; neither wanted the photographs to tell the wrong story.
Coming up on Tavern on the Green, Blair spotted Jocelyn instantly. Her blonde hair the color of honey bathed in sunlight and her grey eyes so light they almost appeared blue, which would have been a perfect match for her polo T-shirt dress. Approaching Jocelyn she smiled brightly kissing the girl on each cheek before taking the girl's hands in hers as though she were looking her over, which in fact she was. "Joss, it's been too long."
"It truly has!" Jocelyn replied with a smile because in truth she had missed Blair Waldorf. The girl was as much a little sister to her as she'd ever had.
Blair then turned to Marcus, she knew that this was the important part this is what had to work out and it had to look just right in the photographs. She spared a quick glance at Aaron who encouraged her to proceed with a reassuring smile and a thumbs up. Placing a hand on Marcus's upper arm she made a show of introducing him to Jocelyn who reciprocated perfectly. Joss turned on her charm just as she had that day in the coffee shop.
They sat through their early dinner together; Jocelyn's chair purposefully closer to Marcus's to give the appearance of familiarity. Truly New York was the only place that they could get away with this. Any other town, people would have been looking around to see what the fuss was about as they had a photographer following them around but the same was true for three other tables at Tavern on the Green. They actually blended in.
Once dinner was over and they began to walk back out of Central Park, Jocelyn locked her arm with Blair's while Marcus walked along a step behind them. "So my little ingénue how are you?"
Blair looked at Jocelyn and smiled ruefully. She knew that Joss's question was purposefully loaded as she was well aware that Jocelyn already knew the details of her personal life. She was actually asking Blair how she was handling things and she wanted an honest answer. "I'm not sick anymore." Blair said softly, knowing that Jocelyn would understand that she was referring to morning sickness, "and this whole debacle has given me something to think about other than Chuck, which has actually been good for me."
Jocelyn nodded, well aware that she was technically breaking almost all of Marcus's rules of conduct at the same time. But she'd given Chuck her word that she would try. The strange thing was that it didn't seem nearly as difficult to get Blair to talk as Chuck had seemed to think it would. The walls weren't quite so sturdy as they once were. "So still no word from Bass?" She asked, her voice full of empathy.
"No." Blair replied curtly as she broke eye contact. "Not a word."
Jocelyn reached over and brushed a lock of hair behind Blair's ear before speaking quietly. "You are the strongest person I've ever known and whether people know it or not, you're also one of the best people I've ever known. You deserve so much and I have complete faith that you'll get all of it. He'll come back."
Blair smiled. Joss was truly her mentor. The older girl had always known just what to say. She was about to respond when Aaron approached them.
"Hello ladies." He spoke, tilting his head in a mock bow.
Blair smiled up at him. From what she'd heard recently, Aaron had almost ended up as her step brother. It was funny to think that she'd been so close to being related to him when she'd spent more time with him today, than she had in all the time their parents had been dating. Truthfully she hadn't even known her mother was seeing someone until the funeral, she'd been too caught up in everything else. "So where to next Mr. Rose?"
Aaron returned her smile. Blair Waldorf was a fascinating creature, as was her friend and whether she knew it or not, she was doing him a major favor with all of this. To be printed in a magazine such as Vanity Fair and being given the opportunity to earn a spot in Vogue was a huge deal . "I thought we'd go to Barney's where the two of you could pick out new outfits and we'd take a few pictures of you shopping around afterwards before you each got some coffee at Fred's Diner."
"That sounds perfect." Blair spoke with a smile. Blair pulled out her phone about to text Jenny and let her know that she probably wouldn't be making it over at all tonight. "Shit, my phone is about to die. We're going to have to run by the Palace so that I can get my charger."
"No!" Jocelyn spoke forcefully without thinking how that might sound; but she couldn't let Blair go back to the Palace, not right now. "Let me see that phone." She said reaching over and taking Blair's cell from her hands. Looking at it briefly, she picked up her own phone and dialed Chuck, crossing her fingers that this would work. Hearing Chuck say hello, she quickly began her spill. "Hi this is Jocelyn Forbes, Ms. Waldorf is going to need a charger for the Verizon Blackberry Curve delivered to the set of the photo shoot this afternoon." Hearing Chuck's acquiescence she immediately hung up rather than risk Blair hearing his voice. "There, now it's all taken care of." She spoke as she handed Blair's phone back.
Blair shrugged slightly. "Thanks, but you didn't have to do that. I don't even know who you called."
Jocelyn smiled. "Ahh but I wanted to darling. Why do something yourself when you can make other people do it for you?" She spoke, purposefully avoiding Blair's question concerning the identity of whom she called. If Blair didn't ask directly she wasn't going to answer, that way there were less lies to keep track of.
Blair smiled and turned to Dan. "Since my phone's dead can you take care of the Gossip Girl blast?"
"It's already done." Dan said, returning her smile. Moments later their phones began to beep.
B, and M, and J oh my! And by this we mean Queen J. Our long lost comrade seems to be back and stirring up the pot faster than you can say Prada. B and M were seen gallivanting in Central Park (was I the only one that thought that relationship had evaporated into thin air?) before having lunch with J at Tavern on the Green. It looks as though B was setting up her ex-hubby with none other than our former Queen. My how the tables do turn. And that's not all the juicy gossip I've heard, it seems as though eNVy has called it quits and N is on his way to see Little J. Sounds like my earlier prediction was right on target. It appears as though our two months of boring have come to an end and I for one couldn't be happier.
XOXO
Gossip girl
A few hours and a few outfit changes later, the entire party arrived at the Vanity Fair headquarters for the photo shoot. Dan stood by on set, discussing the article with the editor and making a few minor changes, while Aaron worked with the photo specialist and later the editor on which photos they were going to use. On the other hand, Jocelyn, Marcus, and Blair were in make up, getting ready for the series of cover shots as well as a few more for the articles. Each of the Vanity Fair covers were to have a different shot featured, using a slightly different concept for each. In each cover, Blair's attire was changed from Diane Von Furstenberg, to Monique Lhuillier, to Michael Kors, and finally Missoni. The US cover was to be a shot of a smiling Blair on the back of Marcus, with her arms around his neck and her legs around his waist. The UK cover featured Blair and Marcus smiling with her back against his chest and his arms around her. The Italian cover was to be a photo of them sitting down, back to back and the Spanish one with him facing the camera straight on while her body faced him, but with her hand on his chest, and her upper body turned to look at the camera. Even with the different poses, each headline conveyed approximately the same message: The marriage was finished but they were still friends.
Looking at the finished products Blair found herself partial to the UK cover's photo but she liked the US headlines better. These headlines read, Royal Marriage Annulled and They Couldn't Be Happier, followed by smaller headlines underneath including, Exclusive interview with Blair Waldorf and Prince Marcus about their unexpected marriage and quick annulment, as well as, Staying Friends With an Ex Can Be Easy, and Prince Marcus's New Girlfriend a Friend of Blair's. Overall, it seemed to have the perfect coherent effect. She didn't mind the others though, except perhaps the Italian one which seemed to ride too much on the idea of fairy tales. When she saw each of the final issues' contents she couldn't have been happier, everything was perfect and their plan had gone off without a hitch.
Saturday, May 16, 2009 - Van der Woodsen-Bass Penthouse, NYC
Nate looked over at Jenny who was wrapped snuggly in a blanket on the couch and couldn't stop the smile that rose to his face. This evening had been normal, the most normal that anything in his life had been in months. They'd all sat around eating Thai and watching movies, action since Blair wasn't here to insist on the classics. It didn't take much to make Nate realize that this was what he wanted, time to spend with his friends, time to spend with Jenny.
Everyone else had gone to bed a few hours ago but she and Nate had stayed up watching another movie. They were planning on sleeping in the media room anyway since neither felt right sleeping in Chuck's bed and Nate didn't feel like going home this late. Jenny knew that he was watching her right now as the end credits rolled on the Bourne Ultimatum. "So are we watching another movie, or are you ready to go to sleep?" Jenny asked, breaking the strange stillness that had settled between them.
Nate rested his head back against the couch. "Do you think we could just talk for a while?"
"Sure." Jenny said, with a small smile. What she'd told Nate earlier wasn't a lie. She'd missed talking to him more than anything. He was one of the few people who seemed to really get her.
Nate had thought, or at least he'd hoped that Jenny would say that, but after her refusal earlier on the street he hadn't really known for certain. There were so many things that he found he needed to say to her. "I broke up with Vanessa today."
Jenny's eyes went wide. When she had named that as part of her requirements for them to be together again, she hadn't expected him to manage to do it quite so quickly. "Already?"
Nate nodded. "Things have been over there for a long time." He inhaled, knowing that he was about to make a fairly large admission to Jenny. "I was only hooking up with her to make you jealous."
Jenny couldn't help the smile that appeared on her face, sure she'd surmised that much herself by now but it was still good to hear it from him. "Well it worked." She said with a lift of her shoulder.
"Good." Nate said, sounding relieved and at the same time like a stubborn child. Both of them were laughing within seconds, neither seeming to be able to stop.
Finally catching her breath, Jenny spoke. "You know, I really am sorry, for everything."
Nate looked over at Jenny, meeting her eyes. "I know. But really the only thing you should be sorry for is keeping it from me for so long. You should have told me what happened with you and Chuck so much sooner."
"I know." Jenny said, echoing his first statement. "I was scared." It was the truth, she'd been terrified of losing him and now that she'd been through that, she was even more terrified of never getting him back. "What I did with Chuck was wrong and it was eating me up inside and I just didn't want to lose you."
Nate couldn't say that she shouldn't have been scared, as much as he might have wanted to. He was the one who'd chased her into Chuck's arms, just like he'd chased Blair the year before but he knew that his reaction wouldn't have been an easy one to handle, even if she'd told him immediately. "I pushed you to what you did with Chuck. I never dealt with my feelings over Blair."
Jenny shook her head, picking up the second Nate's sentence finished. "But I should have known that what you felt for her was in the past."
"Why?" Nate asked with a shrug. "I never gave you reason to."
Jenny closed her eyes, her heart pounding furiously. "Yes you did. Every single day you showed me and told me how much you loved me. I was just so insecure. I thought I didn't compare to Blair."
Nate who was fully facing Jenny now, reached over and brushed her hair behind her ear, tracing her jaw. "You don't have to compare to Blair. For me you're perfect."
"I love you." Jenny said, her voice pained as though the words hurt to speak them.
Nate lifted the blanket Jenny was wrapped in and slid next to her, pulling her to him in a tight embrace. "I love you too. And I forgive you."
Jenny's eyes looked up and met his, seeing the truth there. She didn't know how but something that had seemed to be warring inside of him this afternoon was suddenly so still. For a moment she thought that she would kiss him but decided that now was not the right time. Right now everything was perfect, there was no reason to change anything. So instead she tucked her head into his chest and inhaled deeply.
Nate leaned his head forward and placed a gentle kiss on her head. Within a few minutes both were sound asleep.
Saturday, May 16, 2009 - The Palace, NYC
Chuck looked up at the TV screen in front of him, his eyelids growing heavy. Scarlett had just created a dress from curtains and was trying to swindle Rhett Butler's money. Chuck could identify with Rhett, forever chasing the one woman he wanted, the one woman he'd be willing to settle down for. It was a movie he'd seen before, though he wasn't sure when; he knew it must have been with Blair. Chuck sighed. He'd been sitting here for hours, only occasionally moving to change the movie. He'd read every letter and looked through the entire photo album. There were photos there that hadn't been on the iPod; but here he still sat, remembering nothing more than he did when he got there. Except that wasn't entirely true. He'd gotten a flash earlier in the day of watching Nate and Blair kiss, in which Blair looked up and met his eyes.
Have I told you how good
It feels to be me
When I'm in you
He groaned in frustration and turned off the TV. Looking longingly at the bar, he finally decided he couldn't resist the pull of such exquisite scotch. He'd been avoiding it all day, believing that drinking might pollute his mind and prevent him from remembering. Pouring himself a glass of the amber liquid, he took his first sip, relishing the way it burned his throat. He stood there like that for a few minutes, casually sipping the liquid from the tumbler. When he reached the bottom of the glass, his first instinct was to refill the glass and continue to drink himself into oblivion. He chose instead to set down the glass and go to bed. There was nothing more to do here.
I can only stay clean
When you are around
Don't let me fall
Walking into his bedroom he saw something on the floor that he hadn't seen before, one of his button down shirts. Lifting the fabric he had the distinct sensation that Blair had been sleeping in his clothes. The thought made him smile as he pulled on one of the robes from his closet and climbed into the bed. Jocelyn had texted him earlier saying they wouldn't be done with the photo shoot until six or seven then they were all going for breakfast; so he didn't have to be out until eight. Laying his head down on the pillow, Chuck could feel the disappointment radiating through him. He'd thought that exploring the suite was the answer but he'd come no further today than he had the past few days; the suite was not the key to his memory. He turned his head into the pillow, about to allow his tired eyes to shut when he caught a whiff of something; something lavender. The scent caused a tugging deep in his core as though his body were responding to it.
If I close my eyes forever
Would it ease the pain,
Could I breathe again?
Chuck buried his face in the pillow and inhaled deeply, closing his eyes tightly. It was like a shock to his senses, a shock to his whole body; it was Blair, the key to everything was Blair. No sooner had he really smelled the scent before the memories began to rush through as though he were fast forwarding through a movie of their relationship.
Maybe I´m addicted
I'm out of control
But you're the drug that keeps me from dying.
Thanks for the lift home, you were amazing up there, you sure? The limo, the scent the taste, invaded his being as his memories continued to flash through his mind.
Do you like me? Define like. Something this beautiful deserves to be worn on someone worthy of it's beauty. That kiss he'd placed on her shoulder as she intertwined her fingers with his.
Maybe I'm a liar
But all I really know
Is you're the only reason I'm tryin'
Is that what I am to you . . . Just an accessory? On him yes, on me you'd be so much more. Blair's red tights, her lips tugging on his. The way her body felt in his hands. Nate interrupting.
This thing between us, is over, for good. BLAIR! Her retreating back, in that beautiful silver dress at Cotillion after he'd screwed everything up.
Enough with the blackmail, aren't you bored already? I can't avoid Nate forever. I didn't say forever, just until the sight of you two together doesn't turn my stomach. Don't you have someone else you can torture? Yes but I choose you. Memories that weren't on any kind of iPod, ones that had no trigger.
I'm wasting away
I've made a million mistakes
Am I too late
I'm not pregnant. So goodbye mistake so far in my past I can hardly remember it. You cannot be serious. You can't be touching me. Look if you were going to tell Nate you would have done so in Monaco but you don't want him to hate you. Game over. Game's not over until I say it is. Have fun playing with yourself. And with each memory came the feelings, in this case, it was the hurt and the pain at her rejection. She'd pushed him so far that he'd gone over the edge.
You're like one of my father's Arabians, rode hard and put away wet. I don't want you anymore and I can't see why anyone else would. Some were memories he'd rather forget.
I slept with him in the back of a limo. Several times. And some he wanted to relish.
There's a storm in my head
And it rains on my bed
When you're not here
Don't worry, I can be bitch enough for both of us. I still have the scars on my back to prove it. You know they say when you love something you set it free. They say when you hate something you should slam the door in its face. I love it when you talk dirty Blair.
Lets take it slow this time. Do it right. Chuck Bass is a romantic, who knew? Now you do and that's what matters. Some he would replay in his head over and over again if he had the choice.
He remembered leaving her to go to Tuscany alone, trying to see her and her fathers not letting him and the long miserable summer without her.
I'm not afraid of dying,
But I am afraid of losing you
You need to know that I'm not giving up. I'm not going anywhere. If you want to be with Lord Marcus, that's fine but I'm not going to crawl away with my tail between my legs like I did last time. I'm going to fight for you, and Blair, I'm going to win.
I thought if I could prove to myself that I didn't love you, then I wouldn't lose you. I know that it's backwards but I've never let myself love someone before. But Blair I love you, I love you so much that I can't be without you. God he loved her, he loved her so much it hurt.
What do you say we continue this upstairs? Now that wouldn't be behaving now would it? I want to be with you Blair. I want to make love to you. Normally, I would race you there; however, Roman's mother is in the room between ours so my dad asked me to keep it chill for one night. Oh I can be very quiet. She would never know. CHUCK stop it. . .the point is, I can't be quiet. You know me. That had been at Christmas when Harold had asked them to hold off on the sexual activities for one night and somehow they had managed to do so. He could still fill that want and desire invading his senses and the love, so much love.
Maybe I'm addicted
I'm out of control
But you're the drug that keeps me from dying
He had his memory back, all of it. The good the bad, the best, he thought as his proposal came to mind. Blair I love you. You are the only person that I've ever said that to. I've always thought that I would be a bachelor for my entire life. I didn't want to have to deal with being tied down to one woman. No woman was ever worth the promise of fidelity but something's changed and now I can't even imagine being with someone else. On your wedding day, I would have given the world, to change places with Marcus; to be the guy that you said 'I do' to. I though that I had lost you and now that I have you back, I can't let you go; not now, not ever. So I'm asking you to give me the greatest Christmas present of all and marry me. I love you and I don't care who the law says that you are currently married to. That doesn't matter to me. The knowledge that you would have chosen me, that you would have married me is enough.
Maybe I'm a liar
But all I really know
Is you're the only reason I'm tryin'
We'll run forever if we have to. He's not going to find us Blair; I swear to you. Chuck remembered them trying to run and failing. He remembered the intense emotion of the moment. The intense emotion that came from that failure.
He remembered the agony of Blair's mother's death and the grief that followed as he forced down her walls only to have her leave him again. But none of that compared to the abject agony he felt when Blair ended things for good and he realized that he couldn't live without her. Blair ended things, for good. Now any reason I would have had to be a better person than I was is gone and I'm done trying. When he'd told Jenny that, he'd thought he'd hit his lowest low but that would come a week later in the church when he'd prayed to his mother to save him.
When you are lying next to me
Love is going through to me
Oh it's beautiful
His eyes snapped open as he sat up in bed, he was gasping for air. It was as though he'd been drowning, unable to breathe, unable to see, but someone had suddenly jerked him out of the water and placed him on the beach. In some ways it was true. Without Blair he had been drowning. She was his everything and that he'd forgotten it for even a minute was incomprehensible. But he'd never really forgotten what she'd meant to him, he'd felt it even when he remembered nothing but now he had the memories to go with the feelings.
Everything is clear to me
'Till I hit reality
And I lose it all
There was no way he was going to sleep now. Not after he had gotten his memory back. He had to go to Blair. Chuck was already out of bed when he remembered the way he'd treated her back at the hospital. He owed her more than simply showing up and being back. He owed her a grand gesture. Then he really remembered. He remembered something he'd allowed himself to forget. He'd slept with Jenny. That was something he was going to have to tell Blair. So tonight wasn't the night he would go to her, first he had to do something, think of something to make all of this up to her.
Maybe I'm a liar
But all I really know
Is you're the only reason I'm trying
Conscious that sleep would not be coming for him tonight, Chuck eventually did stand and exit the bedroom before taking a seat in front of the TV; settling in to watch as Rhett continued his pursuit of Scarlett. Maybe it wasn't a grand gesture he needed after all, maybe it was almost the opposite. He needed something simple, something open and honest. Then it would be real.
Sunday, May 17, 2009 - Conde Nast Studios, NYC (early morning)
Aaron's photos were so good, Newhouse personally hired him to do the shots for the Vogue piece featuring Blair and Jocelyn. Blair and Jocelyn were now preparing for the final photo shoot, finished with all the internal Vogue shots even a few on "location" which really meant rooms inside the building that happened to look like they weren't indoors. Blair stood and walked over to the dressing rack realizing that her last dress was one she recognized instead of the others in which she had mostly just known the designers (even though the article was supposed to be based on their shared personal style). But the dress in front of her was different; it was a Waldorf Original and Blair remembered it well as she'd seen Jenny modifying it slightly only a few weeks ago for a Vogue shoot; it was funny mostly because at the time the dress hadn't been for her and she'd envied the girl who would wear it. Running her fingers over the garment, Blair had to fight back tears. Her fingers continued to trace the fabric, surprised when they landed on a slip of paper pinned to the hem. Blair lifted it to her eyes and smiled; however Jenny had discovered what was going on today she didn't know but the note was encouraging.
Your mom always said that you were her best advertisement. Prove her right.
Love you - Little J
Blair was smiling as she pulled on the lovely dress and the assistants zipped her up. Looking in the mirror she couldn't help but think that her mom would have been proud, which brought an extra glow to her skin. Taking a hold of Jocelyn's arm, they walked back out on to set, arms linked and smiles on their faces. Blair looked at the set critically, she wasn't a fan of most of the props that were set out around for their use and that wasn't all. There was something else that just didn't feel quite right. Suddenly, she was struck with an idea, one that was possibly one of her most ridiculous ever, she didn't know fashion or design, so she should be leaving it up to the professionals but something about this idea just felt right.
Extracting herself from Jocelyn, Blair walked over to Aaron who was fiddling with one of the cameras. They'd been working all night and were all worn out, but Aaron seemed to have born the brunt of it. She and Joss were kept up on caffeine but Aaron was so used to caffeine that it wasn't really strong enough for him, he was starting to look exhausted. "I have an idea." Blair announced in a low voice.
"And what would that be?" Aaron asked as he rubbed his eyes vigorously; doing his best to wake himself up. Glancing over at the clock he wanted to groan, they were closing in on six am.
Blair smiled slyly. "Let's go do the shoot outside, on the steps of the Met." She'd felt empowered by the dress and Jenny's note and something about the idea just felt right.
Aaron gave her a critical look. It had been a long night and despite the opportunity that this had been he was ready to get home. Photography, something he normally loved, for the first time felt like a job. He looked out the dark window wondering how to make this feel less like a job and more like fun again. Perhaps Blair was right, maybe they needed a change of scenery. "Okay, let's do it."
Blair's smile widened as she turned and walked over to Jocelyn who looked like she was about to pass out on the floor while Aaron announced the change of plans to everyone still hanging around the shoot which surprisingly still consisted of about thirty people. Some of them like Dan were working to finish the stuff with Vanity Fair which was due at press in two hours, others were stylists, helping her and Jocelyn, some were working with Aaron. Then there were those like Newhouse, who no one had expected to show up at all, who were standing around simply observing. Something about him had become increasingly unnerving. He'd come to sign the contracts with all of them earlier, contracts that she had had sent to Chuck's lawyers and returned a few hours later. She wasn't about to be tricked in any way. Though even after the contracts had been signed, Newhouse remained.
After Aaron announced the location change and the crew got to work relocating things, Newhouse walked over to where Blair and Jocelyn were standing. "So my lovely cover girls, how are you this morning?"
Blair looked at him discerningly, unable to quite put her finger on what was unnerving her about the situation. "You know I still don't quite understand why you wanted us on the cover of Vogue."
Jocelyn looked over at Blair, a look of shock on her face. Normally, Blair was one of the most sane, instinctive people she knew but Joss had noticed something different about her these past few days. Blair was more of an adult than she'd ever been but there was also a bit of cynicism there that hadn't been there before. The girl trusted no one other than herself. But as she looked into Blair's eyes she realized that the brunette might be onto something. Everything about it was kind of suspicious and she knew that with Chuck Bass back in town, things could get out of hand quickly. Turning her head back to face Mr. Newhouse she spoke, her voice steady and clear. "Blair has a point sir. We may not be nobodies but we don't have the kind of status to warrant the cover of Vogue. Vanity Fair, is understandable as it's mainly an article about Blair and Marcus's annulment but this is about our personal fashion, our friendship with each other, and only briefly touches on our respective relationships with Marcus. Yes the British people know who Blair is and soon they'll know who I am; but to the American public I'm a B-level socialite and Blair is just the daughter of fashion designer who happened to marry Marcus. So that begs the question, why do you think we'll sell magazines?"
Newhouse sighed slightly. "Can't you just believe that your beautiful faces will be enough to sell every copy of the magazine that we print? Must you question everything?"
Blair nodded. "Yes." She spoke definitively. "Sure if these Vanity Fair articles take off, the Vogue issue will be popular but if they don't the Vogue cover will flop and you aren't even waiting to see what happens to make the final decision. That is suspicious."
Running his hand through his grey hair, Mr. Newhouse looked away before looking back at the girls, almost as though he was looking over his shoulder. "If it will make you feel better, I can say that this has nothing to do with money. Should the Vogue issue not sell as many covers as our average issue the difference and more, has been taken care of."
Blair's mouth fell open as she realized just what Newhouse was saying. Someone had paid him money, quite a bit of money, to do this cover of them. "You've been paid off?" She asked an accusing but airy quality to her voice. Newhouse gave only a slight tilt of his head in indication that this was the truth. And suddenly the puzzle pieces began clicking together in Blair's head, the car she'd noticed following their cab earlier, the pink peonies in her dressing room at the photo shoot, and someone paying off Mr. Newhouse; all only days after Chuck checked out of the hospital. "Chuck." She barely breathed before finding her voice and meeting Newhouse's eyes. "Chuck Bass is the one who paid you off."
"Now listen here young lady, I didn't name any names." Newhouse was frozen. Chuck had been explicit about the Waldorf girl not finding out about his part in the Vogue cover or the contractual agreements. He couldn't deny that Bass's plan to follow up the Vanity Fair magazine with the Vogue article, was one that would likely make him a lot of money, and the money Bass had offered in case it didn't had been more than enough to get him to agree.
Jocelyn gasped. Of course that's what Chuck had meant over the phone. He'd had a hand in all of this. She knew she could have confirmed Blair's suspicions but she suspected that Blair didn't actually need confirmation from her; besides, she didn't exactly want to face the firing squad from Blair Waldorf concerning Chuck Bass due to the fact that she'd kept his phone call and return to New York a secret.
Blair narrowed her eyes. "The fact that you didn't simply say no he didn't confirms my suspicions sir. However, I also know that Chuck Bass is the only man who has enough money that would be willing to fork it out for something like this; except maybe Marcus." She said, inhaling slightly. Could it be that she'd wanted it to be Chuck so badly that she'd forced it to be him without considering the possibilities? She turned towards Marcus who was standing about ten feet away and called out. "Hey Marcus!"
He turned to face Blair, taking a step towards the trio. "Yes?" He asked curiously.
"You didn't happen to shell out. . ." She paused looking at Mr. Newhouse and taking him in for a moment while she contemplated her next words, finally settling on a sum she found likely. "I don't know, around five million dollars to convince Mr. Newhouse here to do the Vogue article did you?"
Marcus furrowed his brow in a concerned manner. "No. Do I need to?" He asked earnestly as though he was ready to pull out his check book.
Blair smirked. "No, someone's already done that for us." She faced Newhouse once more. "Now that we have that established I think we should finish up this photo shoot, I'm rather exhausted."
Newhouse nodded and turned deciding that this was probably not the best place for him to be anymore. He'd only stayed out of curiosity and he was exhausted as well. Saying his goodbyes he headed out the door as the rest of the crew began the relocation process, loading into large trucks and driving several blocks up to the Metropolitan Museum of Art.
As they arrived at the Met Jocelyn squeezed Blair's hand. "It feels like coming home." She spoke quietly for Blair's ears alone. Blair smiled, it was true. Emerging from the Van that she, Jocelyn, Dan, Marcus, and Aaron had been driven over in she was surprised to see Jenny, Nate, Serena, and Eric waiting on the steps while the camera crew stepped up around them. "What are you guys doing here?" She asked, both surprised and excited. She'd intended to tell them all later about the photo shoot, not thinking they would actually be game for it considering the fact that it involved Marcus.
Jenny smiled brightly. "I was staying at the Van der Woodsen's since Dan was going to be out all night doing the shoot and I'd told everyone why I was there. Dan called me about half an hour ago saying that you guys were coming here to shoot and since we were only a few blocks away we all decided to come watch."
"And were you at the Van der Woodsen's as well Nate?" Blair asked coyly.
Nate grinned sheepishly, a blush rising to his cheeks. "Possibly."
Blair raised an eyebrow but said nothing. She didn't know the circumstances and it wasn't her place to interfere. Noticing that the van had emptied and only a few people there actually knew each other, she made quick with the introductions. "I'm sorry, Jocelyn this is Jenny and Eric who you might have met and you of course know Nate and Serena."
Immediately Joss exchanged hellos, surprised when she was met with coldness from Serena. "Jocelyn, how wonderful to see you." Joss, hadn't failed to notice the formality with which Serena spoke to her; her words were almost clinical. She and Serena had frequently butted heads during Serena's freshman year, before she left for boarding school. Serena had wanted Blair to party more and care less about what people thought about her. She had thought that Jocelyn was a bad influence on her best friend just as Blair had thought Georgina Sparks was a bad influence on Serena. Jocelyn had thought that all of that would have been water under the bridge by now but apparently not. "Serena! Lovely to see you as well. And Eric how you've grown!"
As Jocelyn was speaking to Eric, Blair leaned over towards Jenny whispering in her ear. "So Nate spent the night?"
"Just talking, we're taking it slow." Jenny replied with a smile as she watched Jocelyn greet Nate.
"Hello Sunshine." Nate said, resisting the urge to rumple Jocelyn's perfectly coifed hair. Her hair had earned her his nickname for her but it also had something to do with her ability to brighten any room.
She'd leaned forward into Nate's arms and gave him a hug. "And here's the golden boy, you know even though I thought Chuck would one day come between you and Blair, I did think you were going to end up getting the girl."
"I did." Nate said confidently as he looked directly at Jenny.
Jenny couldn't hide her embarrassment as a blush rose high on her cheeks. She looked away without responding.
Jocelyn followed Nate's gaze and raised her eyebrows. "I see." She said smiling as she turned to Jenny. "So you are the incredible Jennifer Humphrey."
Once more Jenny found she was struggling with her emotions. This time, it just so happened that she was dealing with one she hadn't felt for a while; intimidation. The girl before her might be several inches shorter but there was something very powerful in her presence that made you crave her acceptance. She had known of Jocelyn Forbes when she was in school but the girl was four years older than her and they'd never actually shared the same school. Yet it was impossible not to have heard of her. "Incredible, now that's a word I could get used to." Jenny said jokingly before adding. "And you can call me Jenny."
Jocelyn cracked a smile, the younger girl was amusing. "Well Jenny, you can call me Joss."
Blair smiled at Jenny slightly surprised, for as long as she'd known Jocelyn, she'd never taken to a girl quite that quickly. Blair heard an audible gasp from Serena, who she knew had never heard that phrase from Jocelyn; wouldn't those two ever quit butting heads? Blair then turned and introduced Aaron who gave a curt nod to everyone there. Dan, climbing out of the van walked over immediately and stood behind Serena, giving her a quick kiss on the neck. It was then that Marcus approached, looking extremely sheepish. "Hello everyone." He spoke timidly.
Jocelyn reached over and laced her fingers through his, giving his a slight squeeze. She knew that he had unpleasant history with Blair Waldorf's friends due to the nature of his relationship with Blair Waldorf, but he wasn't that guy anymore. She knew that and Blair knew that and that was what really mattered.
Marcus was bolstered slightly by Jocelyn's reassurance and gave the group a small smile. "It's good to see you all again."
"Sorry, I can't say the same thing." Serena snapped as she crossed her arms. She felt Dan tense slightly behind her. "Be nice." He whispered in her ear and she tried to calm herself but she honestly couldn't even handle being in Marcus's presence after what he'd done.
Nate was grimacing but managed to force himself to shake Marcus's hand. "I still don't like you." Nate said, Marcus's hand still locked with his.
"I don't expect you to." Marcus responded sincerely earning a grim nod from Nate. Turning toward Jenny he expected the worst reaction and was surprised at a slight smile on her features.
Jenny had been watching Blair who was calm next to Marcus, even comfortable. She wasn't sure what had changed there but if he had gained Blair's trust and forgiveness, then she didn't know why she couldn't forgive him as well. "I don't know that I would say it's good to see you but I don't hate it." She said with a slight shrug, earning shocked stares from several of the group.
Marcus was perhaps the most shocked of all. "Why?" He asked completely taken aback.
"You let Blair come home, you helped her find Chuck, and you're here now going along with this crazy scheme so that her name doesn't get dragged through the mud." Marcus looked like he was going to correct her on the last statement but Jenny held up a hand. "Don't even try it, I know that you could have simply announced whatever you wanted, you could have made Blair sound like the bad guy in all of this and you are going to quite extraordinary lengths to prevent that. I'm not saying I forgive you for what you did do to all of us but I'm going to work on it."
"Thank you." Marcus replied sincerely before Aaron began to fuss.
"I hate to break up whatever this is going on but we need to start shooting if we want a few shots before it starts to get light."
Blair nodded, looking quickly amongst their friends, allocating glares and smiles where necessary to ensure a catfight would not break out without the presence of Jocelyn and herself. Then she and Jocelyn each walked to the steps, taking their place in front of the camera. Aaron started with traditional poses, many of them looking serious or regal. As the sun began to rise, Aaron began shooting like a madman, saying that it was all too perfect he didn't know how they would select just one later. When daylight began to set in he allowed the girls to loosen up and get silly with it, knowing he already had his shot.
The rain caught them all by surprise. Aaron was fully ready to pack up and was calling out the orders when he turned and saw them. Jocelyn and Blair each had an umbrella and they were. . .dancing. Water was splattering around them, pouring off the edges of the umbrella but the girls were singing and dancing, kicking up the water at each other. Aaron was back at his camera before any of the crew could blink. Within minutes we was calling out orders. Shot after shot was coming out as pure gold and he just couldn't stop shooting. "Lose the umbrellas." He called out after several minutes.
Jocelyn sat her umbrella to the side timidly, as though she was uncertain that she was okay with the idea and might snatch it back up at any moment. Blair took one look at the intensity of the passion in Aaron's eyes and tossed hers to the side, embracing the rain.
Sunday, May 17, 2009 - Metropolitan Museum of Art, NYC
Chuck sighed as he watched the photo shoot occurring from his place in the shadows across the street. His first sight of Blair since remembering was like water to the main dying of thirst. He couldn't get enough of her, he couldn't stop staring. His eyes had long since watered and stung from his inability to blink but it didn't break his gaze. She was the most beautiful woman in the world and she was the mother of his child. There was nothing more important or more unbelievable. He was filled with love, every part of his being ached with his undeniable, unavoidable love for her. But he would never want to avoid or deny his love for her again. She was his life.
He wanted desperately to get closer to her, to touch her, to feel her, to taste her; but right now he couldn't. She was happier in that moment than he'd seen her since Christmas and he wouldn't tarnish that. He knew she'd be happy, even ecstatic to see him there were things that the two of them needed to discuss and not all of them were entirely pleasant. After everything he'd put her through, everything he'd said to her when she found him in the hospital; he owed her the truth about everything. So he would stand back and let her remain happy for now. It wasn't that he was afraid that she would 'break up with him' for what he'd done with Jenny; he wasn't worried at all about such a thing. There was no breaking up for them, if they hadn't learned that by now they were both damn idiots; but at the same time it would be painful, becoming yet another obstacle that they had to get through.
Today was Sunday, graduation was tomorrow afternoon. They had a tea beforehand and there was to be a reception at the Van der Woodsen-Bass house after followed by a party at Nate's. He wanted to catch her between the reception and the party and he knew just the way to do it. So regardless of the fact that his entire body ached to be with her, this morning he would leave her be. They had all the time in the world, tomorrow. After all, tomorrow was another day.
A/N: So there you go, I hope you enjoyed this chapter. And yes the last line is a Gone With the Wind reference. I have another poll up that some of you may be interested in.
Reviews are always appreciated.
xoxo
kate