"We won't be alone," Jake said. His eyes stayed on the floor.

"What are you talking about?" Leah's eyes bored in to him, and he looked up at her.

"Edward Cullen is guarding us. He said he would stay until he was sure I was able to fight again." Jake shrugged, turning towards me. "He said not to worry about him bothering us, or anything…just that he would make sure the area was safe."

"Patrolling the perimeter?" Leah looked incredulous. "To guard you and his ex-girlfriend all snuggled up in a cabin?" She swore, shook her head, and shrugged in rapid fire succession. "I can't believe I'm actually saying this, but I think you're going to be okay. I never expected in my whole life to know that vampires were capable of love, but if that's not evidence than nothing is." She started to stand up, but I stopped her.

"It's more than just love, Leah. It's family, and forgiveness." She shook her head again and moved towards the door.

"Whatever, vamp tramp. I guess he forgives you for not wanting his cold, dead butt any more, but if you do anything dumb, Jake," and here she turned towards him, a warning arch in her brow, "you can bet he won't forgive you." Jacob's gaze met hers and they both nodded in understanding. I realized she was telling him she wouldn't be happy about it either. We can't be friends. She motioned for Embry and Quil to get up. "Let's leave these two before we have to help with the dishes," she said, and actually winked at me. "Jake, thanks for the clothes. I know it must be weird to have your friends parading around in your mom's old gear, but we appreciate it." These final words echoed in the room after they left, and suddenly Jake and I were alone.

"This was your parent's cabin?" I wanted to be hurt that he hadn't told me, but I wasn't sure when would've been appropriate. He looked at me apologetically and nodded. The dull satin of his skin had paled from his earlier exertion, and the wounded look in his eyes hadn't left since Edward had spoken to him in too low a voice for me to hear. I assumed this was when he'd told Jake he'd be nearby. Jake began to lower himself on to the pile of blankets and pillows.

The light had dimmed; the day had slipped away as we'd discussed the latest insanity to occur since my trip to Forks began. For a moment I worried about the three wolves, and then realized that even if they were weak, Alice would have known if anything were going to happen. It would be tricky…probably requiring her to monitor Edward's future the most…but even without being able to see them directly, she was the ultimate fail safe, and she'd given us a month's reprieve. I got up and stacked dishes and plates, found some candles and lit them in strategic places close to our little nest, and went to sit on the porch where Edward had accompanied me earlier. Jacob's gentle thrumming snores rumbled along the floorboards. The night eased upon us as my mind wandered, searching the dark trees for a splash of white. I knew Edward was there, but as promised, I wouldn't speak to him until tomorrow when we returned to Forks. I found that I missed him; not the lurching, pining rawness I'd felt even recently, but the same yearning I had when I hugged Alice. I was truly beginning to think of Edward as a friend. Could he ever think of me the same way? I thought of his words that afternoon and wondered.

I realized that Jake's snores had ceased in the same instant that he sat down next to me. At least two hours had passed, maybe even more; not nearly enough to compensate for the exhaustion his body must be feeling. He didn't touch me, and I turned to ask him why when I saw the plaintive look on his face.

"Bella, I'm so sorry," he began. His eyes swept mine, and then wandered out to the small, starlit lawn. "I felt so jealous that I acted like last night never happened. I feel like an idiot."

"You acted like an idiot," I said, still looking up at him. In spite of my earlier anger, I wanted to accept his apology, lay him back down, curl into the dip of his spine, and sleep. I wanted to do anything but berate him, and yet, I felt that if we didn't talk about his rapid mood changes now, I would put it off forever. He looked crushed, and then I pushed myself against his side, burrowing in under his arm, inhaling the smell of his warm flesh and woolen blankets. He brightened slightly, but looked as though he knew it wasn't over. "What do you think I'm going to say?"

"I think 'you acted like an idiot' sums it up," Jake muttered. His plump lower lip pushed out in a bashful pout. The blanket wrapped around his lower half didn't cover his calves or feet, and his long hair hung around his face like a storm cloud. He was exquisite, in the way that only loved ones can be. I felt my love for him blooming across my chest, expanding my ribcage; I felt it in the way I hung on every flicker of his eyelashes, the way my hands raced across his stomach to hold him closer. He watched me, looking afraid. "What am I missing?"

"A couple of things." Our voices were low and shaky. "Like, the fact that I can never tell when I'm going to say or do the wrong thing, or that even the most distracting situation in the world isn't enough to keep your emotions predictable." I leaned back and watched his expressions range from tender to furious and back again. "I can understand why seeing Edward and I would be startling, or even…I don't know. Awful. But, along with everything else—"
"What else, Bells?" He genuinely sounded like he didn't know. I leaned back.

"Oh, I don't know…how about, my legs are wrapped around you, we're kissing, and I think this is it he knows we belong together and then poof! Back to depression. Or," Jacob was rolling his eyes, opening his mouth to protest, "I tell you I'm in love with you and you jump out of a truck. You know. Little things."

"All of those things are related, Bells," he said. His tone was slightly scolding.

"I'm worried that the way they're all related is…that they're all times when you almost wolfed out and ate me." I was still trying to keep it light, but the physical distance between us told me that the intense discussion I'd feared earlier had begun.

"No—I totally was not going to eat you last night when we were…when I was…you know what I mean." His lip pushed out again, ripe but for the shock of white in the center, and then the corners folded up into a sly smile. "Well, not in that way, anyway—"

"Oh jeeez Jacob—"

"Okay, okay, listen." He looked at me and the depth of his seriousness touched me. "Do you remember, that first night, when you said Edward's name?" I nodded. "I don't know if it's possible for you to imagine how hard it is to go from being…an animal…to a person. All of a sudden, too—Bells," he looked at me fiercely, and touched my chin with his heated fingertips, "I love you so much that even the remotest chance that I could talk to you again, just speak to you, was enough to make me phase back. I hadn't wanted anything else in years—I just took things, food, shelter, lives. I didn't even remember wanting." His face was closer to mine, the heat in his touch and his breath blowing across my skin. "And when I heard you tell him goodbye—and you have to realize, it took me a minute to even register the words, because they weren't just images…I wanted. I wanted you. Just the chance to say…to say I was sorry for being a dumb kid." There it was. I heard the brutal echo of his voice in my bedroom as he shook off the wolf: I've waited years…to hear you tell him goodbye. "This has been really, really hard for me, Bella." He abruptly sat up, and I winced that his face, once so close, was now further away again. "I was actually relieved in one way, as sick as that sounds, when the vamps showed up. Just because it meant I could go back to being a wolf again, even for a little while." He looked down at his hands, his eyes swimming with things I couldn't understand. The moment lengthened and grew between us, pushing the sweetness in to the past, and I decided it was time for bed.