"You made her do it."
"Do you really think I could make her—of all of you—do anything? Ever?" Edward spun on them, frustration darkening his tone. "She is what you said—strategic. Clever. And she is a warrior—she understands war. That is what we spoke of, nothing more."
Edward respected Leah, like the rest of the men around her; her bitterness and frightfully impulsive temper all contributed to the hold she had on them, but most of all, they knew she saw the future of things in a way that they couldn't. She wasn't psychic, like Alice, but Leah was powerful, if fragile. Edward's words hung in the air over the pack, each one slowly taking them in, and they all startled when she spoke.
"I'm sorry," she said. "I shouldn't have attacked Sam." She looked over them again, and her voice lowered back in to the dreadful monotone from before. "I didn't really want you to kill me. But I don't want to watch you die—I am angry. I am angry at so many things…but I shouldn't have attacked you, Sam."
"Yes you should've," he whispered back to her, the miserable words carrying in spite of the soft sound. "I still don't understand what happened—why it made me—"
"What if it didn't make you?" Leah asked, her voice breaking. "Was it you? If she said no, if she didn't want you—"
"Leah," Jacob spoke, and his voice was low and deep and wide as a river over the desperate, heated sobs now filling the air. "It wasn't the imprint that made that happen. That was an accident—he didn't have anyone to help him learn how to phase. You know this, you've seen his memories—"
"If she needed him to leave her alone, why couldn't he?" Leah erupted. Emily rubbed her back with soothing circles, her other hand wrapped over the ones clutching broken ribs. Silence echoed through the clearing. "I've seen that memory—I've made him show me, over and over and over, and each time I see her face, I see her saying no--"
"What if it was me," Emily said. "What if I knew it was wrong, but inside, under everything I said—"
"Oh nice," Leah snarled, her usual manner abruptly returning. "No means yes? Just like date rape? Perfect."
"That's not what I meant," Emily retorted. She continued to rub Leah's back, even as the women scowled at each other. "What if it knew it had to weaken me, to make me say yes? If imprinting is about improving the line…maybe it didn't give us a choice. Maybe it made Sam take our choices away." She looked deeply in to her cousin's eyes. "I've forgiven him, Leah. I've thought of all the ways it could have happened, and that's all I know."
"So imprinting date-raped both of you," muttered Leah. "Still disgusting."
Emily shrugged, but it was Seth who spoke. "What about now? Is it still gross when they love each other and have kids?" He looked earnest, as if he really wanted to know; his eyes raked across all of them, finding Jared and Jacob in particular. "If imprinting is really so bad…."
"I love Emily," Sam said. He was still planted on his knees, but he watched the two women carefully. "I've never forgotten you, Leah…I think everybody knows that. But underneath what happened…I do love Emily. For herself, not because of anything else."
"And I love you," Emily said simply. She and Sam both softened; I remembered Emily's tears at my kitchen table and hoped that this meant she could talk to him the next time her heart ached over the wrong kinds flowers, the small things that make life pass easily. I hoped Leah would still let Emily touch her when we all left this dark place.
"I never loved my imprint," Jacob said, and everybody was silenced once again. He looked at me, and I nodded; I knew he wanted to make sure nothing he said would make me uncomfortable. Edward stared hard at the tall man, an inscrutable expression on his face; occasionally he would glance at Leah, but I was the only one who saw, and when he caught me looking he gave me a tentative smile I gladly returned. Edward had always been attracted to noble people; Leah was that, for all her flaws. It seemed obvious there was some clear connection between them, even if she didn't want one to exist.
"My imprint was a child of the moon," Jake said, and the pack hung on each word as he detailed their meeting. At one point in the story we were all startled by a gasp from Edward, who then waved us on, embarrassed that he'd interrupted. Raising an eyebrow, Jake continued, explaining everything, from the vampire attack to the plan to prevent more from reaching La Push, until Quil stopped him.
"Why?" The hurt in his voice made Embry's stance change, reaching out; Jacob walked towards him and then stopped when he saw Quil's shaking hands. "Why didn't you ask me to help with the burial?"
"Because you were mad at him already, Quil," Sam said from his post on the ground. "You were furious when he left."
"And you would've told me," Leah said. Embry hung his head, but she clucked her tongue. "I don't blame you, Embry. Seeing how I reacted tonight…" When he lifted his head again, his expression hopeful, a steadier Quil came back and stood beside him.
"Yeah," Quil muttered. "I've never been a traitor, hiding mutinous thoughts—"
"Because you can't ever shut up and you say them all out loud," Leah cut him off, her tone dour. Emily giggled, and Edward hid a smile. For a minute, things seemed alright, and maybe that was why, for the first time, one of the little wolves spoke.
"So you didn't want us?" It was the thin one from the night we'd fought Victoria, the one Alice had spoken to. His hair was long, sun-burnt streaks of red cutting through the deep black visible even under the night sky, and he twisted a piece between his fingers nervously as he spoke to the pack. "You tried to make sure there weren't any new wolves?"
"They just didn't want us to have to deal with imprinting, duh," snapped an even younger boy, one of the small ones that could never sit still.
"They think being a wolf is hard," said the largest, oldest of them. He stared out at the adults. "It is hard, isn't it?" When he stood up, I was instantly, painfully reminded of the Jacob I'd first known—tall and strong, but naturally so. The wolf was already pinning more muscles to his bones, stretching his skeleton, but the boy looked sharply like my slender Jacob from First Beach. The same wide mouth, the same bright eyes. "I thought it would be great—to be strong, and tough like you guys. Nobody can mess with you." He didn't have the youthful Jake's sunny disposition, though; this boy had suffered in the world, and it showed. "But you make it seem so…bad." His lips twisted, worry pouring out of his young face.
"Being a protector is not easy," Sam said quietly. The boy looked down, but the younger one who'd piped up about imprinting leapt to his feet and stood tall.
"You're not even alpha any more," he said in his high voice, and one of the other young ones began to tug at his hand. He yanked it away and boldly took another step forward, the older boy now watching Sam from behind his hair. "Maybe being alpha isn't easy, but—"
"Nothing about this is easy," Leah snapped. Emily lightly slapped her arm, and Leah furrowed her brow at her cousin before turning back to the children with a softer expression. "Sam was the best alpha for you, wasn't he?"
The younger boy stood on one leg and cocked his head, but the older boy nodded without hesitation. Leah nodded back.
"Lots of tribes have a war chief and a peace chief." This came from the third oldest boy, also thin, also from the night with Victoria. He stood next to his friends, his long hair pulled back in a tight braid. "Maybe Sam is a peace chief."
"I want Leah to be chief then," said the sassy younger boy. "I don't want Jacob to be alpha."