Rating:
This chapter is Rated T.

Beta:
Nightingale Winters; thank you so much for cleaning up this chapter in a short amount of time.
Isabella Rain; your editing skills are mad-ass!

Authors Notes:
You fans are amazing. The response I've had to this story is wonderful. Thank you so much for your support!

Disclaimer:
The author Richelle Mead owns the Vampire Academy universe. I Want To Experience Love is a Vampire Academy Fan Fiction story and it is not intended to infringe on any copyrights held by Richelle Mead or Razor Bill Company. Richelle Mead is the creator of the Vampire Academy characters, however this story is my original work. Copyright 2010 by xx-RedRoseBlackThorn-xx. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without my express written authorization.

CHAPTER TWO

Rage Management

As I was walking into the cafeteria area, I could smell delicious bagels and doughnuts, which I had been craving all morning. I lined up in the long line, noticing who was lined up in front of me.

Jesse Zeklos.

I was not in the mood to deal with him right now. Especially since the incident I had this morning, and at the best of times, I couldn't stand him. Yeah, he was really good looking, but his attitude stunk. I decided not to look straight ahead and, instead, looked around the room, hoping he didn't turn around and make communication.

The line was getting smaller to my delight, and I turned my head to a whistle I heard. It was Christian trying to get my attention, while looking very irritated. I was trying to think what could possibly be causing him to look so glum as I waved towards him, letting him know he got my attention. That's when I noticed Lissa was not seated next to him.

To my disgust, Jesse Zeklos noticed the exchange and had a big sly smile on his face while turning towards me. I guess trying to keep a low profile from him wasn't going to work now. Thanks Christian. Remind me to get you back for that later.

"Rose," he nodded. "What a pleasure to be here in the line next to you," he said sarcastically.

"The pleasure is all mine," I said with more exaggeration. "Look Jesse, I don't want to hear anything. I'm hungry, tired, and not in the mood. I just want to grab some breakfast and be on my way. I'll even pretend we never had this conversation."

"Why, what's up? Want to talk about it? I know you do." He took a step closer. "How about we meet up in the common room later tonight, and prove the rumors about us are true," he added with a wink.

I took a step back. Man, he really didn't have the effect on me he used to. He used to be able to make me squirm with lust, but now his manner makes me feel sick with nausea.

"I couldn't do that to you Jesse. I might ruin the tight reputation you got going," I said with a devious smile. "You see, if I take you up on the offer, you won't be coming out of that room happy, if you get what I mean," I winked.

Jesse picked up a plate and was more than willing to start grabbing some food. "You wouldn't do anything that could jeopardize your time at the academy for the princess."

"You have no idea what I would do, especially to you. Leaving the academy would be worth what I'm thinking about doing to your pretty – pretty average face." I grabbed a plate, some bagels and doughnuts, while leaving Jesse at the fruit bar.

As I started walking over to Christian, he was still by himself. I was stunned as to where Lissa was off to this morning. I gave him a big cheery smile; I knew he loved my company.

"I didn't know Jesse can still tickle your fancy," he forced a smile.

"He can't and you know it." I sat across from him. "Jeez, smile Christian. I know you don't like my company all that much but at least try and smile. Oh wait, you can't - I forgot."

He just looked down to the floor. What was wrong with him today? Maybe he and Lissa had a fight? No, that would still mean she would be here to talk to me. That means I'm going to have to play nice with him to find out. Oh what the heck, he looks pained, so I don't need to sound sincere. It will come out naturally.

"What's wrong? Not feeling well?"

"I'm fine," he said as he looked at his barely eaten pancakes.

"I know we have had our ups and downs Christian, but I do care about your well being," I wiggled my eyes. "Is there trouble in paradise?" I knew the answer to that one. I've been having trouble sleeping because of him and Lissa.

"No."

"So then talk. What's wrong? Is there anything I can help with?"

"Just leave it alone, Rose." He pushed the plate away and started to stand up.

"Wait. Don't go. I'm sorry. I'm just trying to understand. No need to get all snotty on me. I know you're antisocial but I thought you got over that with me." I placed my hand on his arm pulling for him to sit back down. "But do tell me where Lissa is."

"You can check for yourself."

So I did check. I was sucked into Lissa body and she was walking out of the feeder's room on her way to the cafeteria. She didn't seem to have been feeling any different. She was as happy as she normally was on a daily basis.

"She is on her way here now." I started to nibble on my bagel and noticed Christian slump and sigh. "Oh for God's sake, Christian, what is it?"

He finally spoke a full sentence. "She's stopped taking her medication."

"What? Why?" This can't be true. It was helping her get back on track.

"She said she is learning a lot from class now, since they know she specializes in spirit. So the medications are unnecessary, especially if she wants to involve her powers." He looked more annoyed about her choice instead of being worried she could hurt herself.

"Okay. I guess she would have had to talk to Dr. Olendzki about this." He nodded. "Then why are you annoyed? I thought you would be happy that she is learning something that is making her progress."

"It's not that she's stopped. Well, that did worry me a little bit, but they seem certain that she can keep it under control." He stated, irritated again, like the reason he was upset should be obvious to me.

"Then what is it Christian, because if you don't get to the bottom of this soon, I swear you won't have any male bits left. Get to the point!" Why did he have to make everything so hard to understand about him? I guess the fight I had with Dimitri this morning didn't help much with my patience.

"It's because she is learning new skills and how to control them with Adrian. They are having extra learning sessions together." He looked me in the eyes. He looked hurt, but why? I know Christian and Adrian don't get along much, but wasn't he teaching Lissa new skills? He should be happy and supporting her.

"Oh..." That was all I could say. I didn't like the idea of her being around Adrian all that much either. I wasn't going to continue the conversation with Christian; it would only make it worse. I picked up a doughnut and took a bite. I think he got the idea to leave it alone.

"Yeah, so what did Jesse want?"

"Not much really, just being a jerk as always." I smiled, hoping I could lighten the mood.

"Aren't all the royals like that?" he said with full Christian disgust. I saw Lissa grab some fruit from the fruit bar.

"Not all." I said with a mock expression. "Lissa is a caring, friendly, intelligent, and a royal, must I remind you." He looked at me with anticipation. "So are you. Maybe forget about the caring and friendliness but you can be intelligent." I smiled and tapped his head twice. "And Adrian, well, I don't know. He doesn't seem as ignorant as the others."

Christian rolled his eyes and sighed in disgust, just as Lissa sat at our table. She gave him a glare thinking it was to do with her sitting at the table.

"It wasn't at you, hun." He kissed her forehead.

"I feel the tension on this table. You two aren't fighting again are you?" She looked between Christian and me giving each of us a weird stare. "Because like I've said before, I'm not choosing between my best friend and my boyfriend."

"That's not what it's about Lissa. I found out that you are off your medication. How come you didn't tell me?" I asked, a little hurt. She had confided in Christian instead of me.

"I was going to tell you this morning. The only reason Christian found out before you was because he was with me last night before curfew was overdue. By the time I was able to tell you it was too late," She said with all honesty.

"Are you sure you can handle it? I know you're strong, but I don't want -"

"I'll be fine Rose. I have the all go from Dr. Olendzki, and Adrian is trying to teach me how to dream walk and see auras." She took a quick glance at Christian. She saw the look on his face and looked back at me.

"Okay, okay. I'm sorry. I'm your best friend. I'm meant to worry about you; it's what we do for each other. What does Adrian get in return?" Now I'm curious.

She leaned forward. "I'm trying to teach him how to heal. Since that's the only thing I'm good at."

Before I could say anything, Christian butted in. "Lissa, you are excellent at a lot of stuff. You don't need to hang around Adrian because you think you need to learn more." He sounded irritated for the hundredth time today. He was really starting to test my patience.

"Christian just leave her alone, will you? We can't tell her what to do with her life. If she wants to work with Adrian, then let her work with Adrian. All we can do is give her advice and I think we have done enough of that, don't you?" I hissed. Where was the supportive boyfriend he claimed to be?

"Guys please don't –" Lissa began.

"I'm just trying to look after my girlfriend Rose. That's what I do remember. Me, you know, her boyfriend?"

I stood up. "You're pathetic Christian. You can't even trust Lissa to be with Adrian. What kind of boyfriend can't even trust the girl he is going out with?" I pushed my plate and it slammed into Christian's. Some of the students in the cafeteria were looking in our direction.

"Rose, what's gotten into you?" Lissa said with worry. I didn't know the reason myself.

"Nothing, I'm sorry. I've just had a pretty bad start to the day." The bell rang and I started to grab my bag.

"With Guardian Belikov? I thought you enjoyed his classes. You know all alone with him and all." Christian said with a smart ass smile. Lissa just glared at him and slapped his leg. What would he know about our training sessions, unless Adrian told him? No, he couldn't have. They weren't even friends to begin with. I was about to show Christian some of the violence I'd been building up since this morning, but Lissa stepped in. I don't think I could hurt him anyway. It would upset Lissa, unless it wasn't physical . . . Lissa interrupted my thoughts.

"Come on Rose, I'll walk you to your class and we can talk." Lissa kissed Christian goodbye and got up to walk me to class.

"What was that all about? I know you two have your differences, but since everything that happened in Spokane, I thought you two could get over it."

"Yeah, we have. It's just a shock to both of us. Don't worry, we'll get used to it." I gave her a reassuring smile and added, "You don't have to walk me all the way Lissa. It's too far and you have to walk all the way back to your class."

"Are you sure? I know we haven't spent much time together lately, but you do mean a lot to me Rose." I could sense through the bond her feeling of guilt about spending too much time with Christian since Spokane, rather than spending time with me to see if I'm coping okay.

"It's fine Lissa. I'm fine, seriously. Go on, I don't want you to get into trouble for being late. That's my job, remember?"

"Ok, I'll see you at lunch. Oh, I almost forgot. Xander Badica is having a gathering at his dorm tonight. I was invited and I'm bringing you and Christian with me."

"I don't think they'll want me there Lissa."

"Oh come on. They know I'll invite you and they didn't say not too. Please . . ." She pouted.

"Fine. I guess I need some time out anyway. Can I bring someone else though? I don't want to be the third wheel when you and Christian are making out." I made a gagging noise.

"Yep sure! It starts at 8:00pm. We can talk about it more at lunch." She hugged me goodbye and started walking back in the other direction.

Who was I going to invite to Xander Badica's gathering? All of his friends will be there already and I don't get along with them very well.

I walked into combat training late. Why did I seem to be making a habit out of this? Eddie was out in the front of the class. He was the instructor of this class since Mason passed away. I couldn't argue and neither could the other Dhampir's. Eddie was a kick ass instructor, with his moves and attitude. He did make us do a fair bit of work, but he also allowed us to laugh and have fun when deserved.

He has stepped up his game a lot since Spokane. I guess all four of us have. But Eddie has improved a lot in his ability to fight. If I were a Moroi, I wouldn't mind him being my guardian. He's not bad looking either.

Wait.

He's not bad looking.

He has stepped up his game.

No, I wasn't going to ask was I?

"Watch out Rose!" Ryan Aylesworth yelled. I must have been standing there for some time now. Ryan was one of the good boys that always do as their told and sits up in the front of the class. He was a suck up and he probably wanted me to move to show off to Eddie.

"Rose, got a partner?" Eddie asked, concerned.

"Um." I looked totally ridiculous just standing there. "No, I don't." How did Eddie know about the gathering? He must have heard some of the other Moroi talking about it.

"I'll be happy to then." He said with a cute smile.

"Fantastic. Thanks Eddie, I'll make it up to you next time. We're probably going to be the only Dhampir's there."

"It's not a problem Rose, and there is no need to make it up to me. We're an odd number these days since the absence of a -." He took a deep breath. "Absence of a close friend. I can't imagine what you mean about the only Dhampir's there. We have everyone we need here." He looked around, confused.

"Sorry, Eddie. I thought you were talking about something else. Now I just made a fool out of myself." I could feel myself starting to blush and I hardly ever got embarrassed.

"No you didn't. Don't be silly. What was it you were talking about?"

"Xander Badica is having a gathering tonight and invited Lissa, Christian, and I. I was wondering if you wanted to go together."

God, why did I feel so stupid? Probably because he has made it very clear he thought Mason and I were going out, and he doesn't want to jump in and take something from him. It's not like we were going to be in a relationship? Unless that's the reason he thinks I asked. That means no alcohol for me tonight. I didn't want to lead someone else on, but it's Eddie, a good mate of mine. Then if he is a good mate, then why is he staring at me like that? Now he has got me extremely nervous. I wonder what he is going to say. Please say yes, so I don't look like a fool. Though the look on his face might say otherwise. I feel so sick, but it's only Eddie.

"Rose... Rose?" Eddie was moving his hand back and forth in front of my face.

"Can you repeat that?" I asked. How embarrassing I zoned out. What was his answer?