Ai Wow…I haven't updated in so long. And I'm sorry! Writer's block got me, then school came along, and I have to focus on the evil world of algebra and Earth/Space Science if I want to make it to high school. And then one weekend, I was trying to figure out what to update…and this came into my head. I hadn't planned to update for a while, actually, and I'm not sure where I'm going with this chapter, so cut me some slack if it stinks, plzkthx. :D
I don't own Jedi Apprentice. Seriously, don't people know that? Why put a disclaimer, when everyone can assume I'm so irresponsible I can't be trusted with my own homework, let alone the entire Jedi Apprentice fandom!
Hijacked!
Greeting galactic civilians! And if you happen to be from out of the galaxy, hello, too! Just check in with Republic security, so we know you're not going to take over our galaxy with your biological weapons of mass destruction. This is Qui-Gon Jinn here, filling in for Tahl, as she is on a mission in the outer rim and should be gone for a few months. I figured she would want her loyal readers to be entertained while she's away, so I am here to help her out. Prepare yourself for the shocking stories of those who are victim to Tahl's interrogations. Yes, the real inside scoop behind the inside scoop.
Here we shall start with the opinions of every being Tahl has interviewed:
Obi-Wan Kenobi says, "I was really mad the first few weeks, when the gossip was fresh. Everyone kept staring at me like they expected my eyes to turn red and I would suddenly start screaming out threats. But later on, the girls started to think my status as a bad boy Padawan was cool. I could say I owe Tahl a thank you, but the crowds of screaming fangirls do get annoying."
Xanatos: N/A
Bant Eerin says, "No way did Tahl's article do me any good. Anytime they have seafood in the cafeteria, guess who is the topic of the night's jokes! And now no one will even listen to my dolphin story. I'm telling you, my great, great, great, great, (etc, etc, cost too much ink to print the rest) grandfather was a dolphin."
I, Qui-Gon Jinn, say, "I strongly oppose our relationship being revealed the media for judgment. After all, flowers aren't manly! And I am by far not a hippie. Look at Cin Draillg or even Master Windu if you want a hippie. But not me. Peace out."
Yoda says, "No one messes with a T-Rex, even if they are unsure. Pleased, I am, by this outcome."
Garen Muln ponders, "Obi-Wan's a nice guy. He and I are close friends. But taking our friendship to the extremes and saying we are brothers? It sounds strange. Consider this, Tahl. You and Qui-Gon are good friends, correct? You are also the same age. Does that mean you are dating your brother?"
Mace Windu says, "Tahl is so immature. I remember when she was still an older Youngling and she wasn't potty trained. And now this; I bet it is because of her immaturity. Why even wonder about my hair? How about she takes into the account I am a member of the Jedi Council?"
Adi Gallia says, "For a Jedi Librarian, she doesn't know much about anything, or else she would not have this tabloid. She could have done her research before launching such an investigation. Of course, she must be restless, being stuck inside the Temple for most of her years and suffering from blindness. I just wish she hadn't chosen me to question! It's a headdress, not an octopus!" (Note: Tahl seems to have an obsession with sea creatures.)
The Jedi High Council has already voiced their opinion by sending Tahl off on a mission far, far away…
That concludes this issue. I hope Tahl appreciates the new, er, insight on her work. Not all of us like to talk via Letter to the Editor. But for those who do, here is what they say:
--
Tahl,
Hi…er, I heard about your boyfriend, and first of all, just saying, dump him. He seems so…shaggy, and…I don't know…maverick? Play it safe and stick with the nice boys. After when you're done with him, can you please send him to Ord Vaxal? I know someone who would like to meet him…you know, completely casual. Well, thanks!
-Aliana
Ord Vaxal
Qui-Gon,
If you're reading this, it's because you've taken over my tabloid. I suggest you stop, if you want to keep that beard of yours…
-Tahl
Tahl,
I love your tabloid. I saw Yoda on a once, I was like, "Oh my gosh, it's the T-Rex!" And then I spilled my caf all over him. His garments cost a lot to dry clean…
-Senatorial Aid
Coruscant.
Well…that's it. I'm not out of ideas, I just have a bunch of undeveloped ones. I should update…soon? I hope I do, but only if time allows.
Reviews make me the happiest kitten this galaxy shall ever know.