(The NEWEST AN: I've tampered with this AN (and chapter) so much. For the new AN and the apology of a lifetime, please look at the bottom of this chapter – but the original but tampered with AN still stands. Thanks for sticking with this.)

AN: Okay, I'm back and I'm tying (stating the obvious much). I know you've had to wait for ages for an update but Jimothy (my writer's block (yes, I named my writer's block but in my defence, it really does help to name it when you want to curse it)) came to sit on this until I read Nain-san's reviews (nats-stars) then I had some major ideas all jump into my head at once. The truth is, I honestly didn't know if I was going to let Murtagh live until lunchtime today (NEW AN: or a few days ago… (EVEN NEWER AN: Yeah, or ages ago! When I get my hands on Jimothy…)) when this happened:

Me: I've got some really good ideas for it but I still don't know if I'm gonna kill off Murtagh yet-

Both Sadie and Natalie (aka Sadie193 and nats-stars (or Nain)): NO!

Me: What?

Natalie: You can't kill Murtagh!

Me: Why not?

Sadie: 'Cause he's funny.

Natalie: And we need our mini emo one! It won't be the same without him!

Me: (gives enigmatic grin) Well, we'll see…

So yeah, watch this space…

…or preferably, move on and read the chapter…

Disclaimer: I don't own the Inheritance Cycle, so don't sue me… Please?

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(AN: Jimothy NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! And I was just about to start… My writer's block's just so darn persistent!)

Islanzadí, queen of the elves, stepped out of her car and took in the horrific scene in front of her.

"Just what is going on here?" she demanded, looking from Selena, who was watching the flames engulfing the house anxiously while Arya spoke to her at a billion miles per hour, to Eragon, who was choking in Morzan's grip as his father instructed him to 'shake it off'.

No-one answered her.

With a sigh, Islanzadí murmured the word in the ancient language that would heal Eragon, following them with the words to put out the fire around the house.

"NOW WHAT IS GOING ON?" she yelled as everyone (including the firemen) stared in surprise at what was the burning house.

The only reply she got was Selena shrieking, "MURTAGH!" and running across the burnt lawn to an equally burnt, blackened lump on the grass, laying next to another lump with a strangely still recognisable Morrison's uniform on.

There was total silence as she ran until…

"Oh dear."

You're not helping, Angela, Solembum stated from the witch's feet.

Eragon, finally recovering from the shock of regaining the ability to breathe, snapped out of his thoughts, grabbed Arya and sprinted to his mother and brother with Islanzadí close behind him.

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You owe me twenty burgers, Saphira informed Thorn with satisfaction as the two dragons circled the site of calamity.

What? Thorn exclaimed.

Saphira sighed, the motion blowing smoke into Thorn's face. When we moved in, I bet you twenty burgers that your rider would be first to get burnt to a crisp.

I don't owe you anything! The red dragon insisted.

Really? Saphira teased. Your mini emo one is looking very crispy right now, don't you think?

It was true but there was no way Thorn was going to let himself be beaten by a female. He puffed smoke from his nostrils in defiance. Well, your little one was burnt first! Look at him! His skin is blacker than Shruikan's scales!

Yes, I will admit little one needs washing but he's not burnt to a crisp. So pay up!

Never!

Don't make the bet if you can't pay the price. I expect payment as soon as possible.

Saphira, do you think we should do something?

Saphira considered this for a moment, looking down at the panicking people. Nah, they've got to learn to look after themselves sometime. Now, about your revenge on Solembum…

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Someone was stroking his hair.

His head was spinning. He was not looking forward to opening his eyes. How much did he drink? He didn't doubt it was any less than the amount of alcohol it took to knock out an elephant. No, there was no doubt in his mind at all about that. The real question was how many elephants could have been knocked out with the amount of alcohol he'd forced down his throat.

Someone was stoking his hair… And his arm… and his chest and his legs and his stomach and his… nose?

Ha! HA! Suck on that, Solembum! I rule! Hey, mini emo one! You're alive! Man, that was some good revenge. You're not a crisp, are you?

Murtagh, who struggles to keep up with his dragon's high-speed babble answered, Erm… No?

A shriek startled him. His eyes snapped open just in time to see Orik hit the grass and to catch Eragon, Arya, Islanzadí, Morzan, Brom and Galbatorix all resting a hand on him.

His first reaction was to twist his arm away from Galbatorix, who was eyeing it hungrily, because, funnily enough, Murtagh was rather fond of his hands and a missing limb from being munched on by a crazy person was probably a major turn-off and Murtagh liked the idea of having a girlfriend. He just never had the heart to introduce anyone into the insanity that was his life even if they didn't take one look at him with his beloved rusty arrow and insane family and run screaming for the hills.

His second reaction, occurring almost immediately after the first, was to ask, "Eragon, why are you holding my nose?"

Even though he didn't sound human due to his brother still holding his nose, Eragon understood and replied, "We used magic to save your life!"

"And it worked!" Arya added.

Islanzadí smirked. "I knew it would. You see, this is why I am queen of Ellesmera, because I am unmoveable at times of crisis."

"And because she's hot!" The Morrison's alcohol delivering paramedic and fireman guy quipped while nursing one of his many minor burns. He was more relieved that the magic done by the family of the insane rich freak and the insane rich freak himself had jumped to heal his worst injuries as well than he had ever been in his life.

Naturally, everyone stared.

Silence reigned.

"Eragod, why are you till holdig by dose?"

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AN (the one the NEWEST AN was talking about): Firstly, I've got apologise. I don't update quickly. It's taken me forever to update this chapter and I'm actually amazed that so many of you still read this – in fact, I'm amazed anyone still reads this. So a big Thank You to all of you who have stuck with this fic.

Secondly, and I hope you'll all be pleased to hear this; my English coursework deadline has passed so I'll hopefully have a bit more time to write, also, it's the Christmas holidays, so that gives me even more time to write. Basically, I'm going to update more often and I'm finishing this fic. I will have the next chapter up before (or on) January 3rd.

Okay, I know this chapter was short but it felt right to end it there.

Next Chapter: The family sort out the issue of the ruined house and go… ICE SKATING? They must be insane…

Review Replies: I've run out of time to upload this so I'm going to send review replies out tomorrow instead.

So thanks for reading this and thank you to everyone who's been kind enough to leave a review, even if they've said they hate my guts.

Please review!

~ The Purple Rose