A White Demon Love Song

by Caiti Rose

Chapter Four: Must Get Out

The trees flew past me at an impossible speed. My eyes were focused straight ahead. I was missing branches by centimeters. But this was all second nature to me now. It was late, and although not impossible, it was difficult to see in the dark. The moon was just a sliver tonight, not providing very much light. A human would never be able to see where they were going. I just needed an escape. I needed to clear my head. And most of all, I needed to be away from Alice's preachy stare and Edward's smoldering looks. Rosalie too. She may not have...extra help... like Alice and Edward, but she was very intuitive. She knew she was being used as a release for me at the moment. I just needed to get this girl out of my head and I would be fine. Things would go back to the way they were for years, and everything would be content and normal again.

I hated that I was causing these problems. It's not like I could help it. That girl is fucking intoxicating. Everything about her. Her beautiful brown eyes, her warm laugh, her infectious smile, and of course, the sweet, sweet smell of her blood. I loved my adopted family. Edward and Jasper may as well be my real siblings. Alice too. Esme and Carlisle were unbelievably amazing also. They had done so much for me. More than I deserved. I loved them. And Rosalie. Of course Rosalie. Things had always been so great for us. Sure we fought, like any other couple... but we were solid, and good together. I refused to let this weak little human girl break apart the family that I had. The relationships that had grown over so many decades. I wouldn't let her come between this. I needed to get her out of my head!

I continued running. I didn't even know how long it had been now. It must be three or four in the morning. Edward and Bella were back from their trip to Jacksonville. Bella told her father she'd be staying for one more night, but instead, she was staying with us. Edward had made up a bed for her. I couldn't be in the house tonight, that was for sure. Not with her asleep, tossing and turning in the room right next to mine. I vividly imagined her perfect body, writhing under the covers. No. I wouldn't be near her tonight. Who knows what I would do.

Alone with my thoughts again... It had been happening so much lately. I had never really been too much of a complex person. I never needed to actually set apart time to think. It was weird for me. Having to do so much thinking and reflecting.

As I continued to run. I noticed that the sun started to peak up over the horizon. I slowed to fast walk. And took in my surroundings. I had been running North. I couldn't be too far from the Canadian border now. I took a deep breath. I could continue running, and spend more time away from my family. Or I could stop being such a coward and just go back. It was during this particular thinking process that I heard a noise. I closed my eyes and inhaled deeply through my nose. Grizzly. My favorite.

Okay, I made up my mind. I'll hunt a little bit, so I'm under control... Then I'll head home.

I felt slightly awkward when I opened the side door to my house. It was already afternoon. I had been gone for almost twenty four hours. I was afraid of what everyone would say. I shook my head and took a step inside. "I'm back!" I called. I listened for a response carefully, then realized everyone else would be at school. And Carlisle at work. I wandered upstairs to find Esme alone, reading. She was always reading.

She smiled brightly. "Emmett! Where have you been? I've been worried."

She nudged her gently, "Oh please, you weren't worried. You're just trying to be all mom-like."

"Guilty." She said, laughing quietly. "Did you have a chance to clear your head?"

"Edward told you." It wasn't so much of a question. More of a statement. Of course he had told her. He was starting to piss me off. I wish he would just stay out of my damn head sometimes. Sure, it was convenient... but it was annoying.

"Yes, he told me. How are you feeling?"

"Confused, frustrated." I rolled my eyes.

"Sweetie, that's normal. It's not just a human thing. It can happen to us as well. Our hearts may not be beating, but they feel the same emotions as anyone else. You can't expect to live your life without complications. There are going to be many things in life that test you. Temptation is one of them."

I nodded, taking in everything she was saying. I never opened up like this to anyone, except Esme. She was just so easy to talk to, and had great, motherly advice. I don't remember my human mother much, but I remember what it was like to have someone like that. To go to and depend on. Someone that can pick up on how your feeling, not because of.... special powers, but because of their unconditional love. A real 'mother'. Esme fit that role perfectly.

"So you're saying not to act on it? Not to give in to the temptation?"

Esme contemplated this for a moment. "Well... The situation is a fragile one. Usually I would say... as long as it wasn't long lasting... go ahead and act on it. Personally, ever since he changed me, I've never been tempted by anyone but Carlisle. But I understand. You were changed when you were younger. You still have those teen boy hormones." She jokingly stuck her tongue out at me. "Look, Emmett, sweetheart, you have to do what is best for you. However, you need to take the rest of the family into account as well. It would crush Rosalie, and I shudder to think what it would do to Edward. Just keep that in mind when you start having those tempting thought about her. Think of what it would do to your brother."

I nodded. Again with the great advice. She was the best. "Thanks Esme..... mom." I hugged her tightly. "That means a lot."

She gave me a kiss on top of my head, and I stood up to go to my room. I needed some mindless, human television. That would help take my mind off things.

I collapsed on my lounge chair and flipped through stations. I came to a stop at some adult humor cartoon show. There was a marathon, so I didn't have to worry about finding something new when it was over.

Hours passed, and finally, I heard two cars pull up. I heard Rosalie's BMW, and Edward's Volvo. I wondered why they would have to take two cars, then I realized.... Edward picked Bella up for school again this morning... every time he did that, he always brought her here after. I sighed. Great. That's exactly what I needed. I turned the TV off and walked to the top of the stairs. Edward walked in as predicted, with his arm around Bella. I clenched my fists and closed my eyes. God! Every single time! Every time she walked in, her scent hit me like a ton of bricks. I took a moment to inhale a few times, before steadying myself, and opening my eyes. There, at the bottom of the steps, beaming up at me, the biggest and warmest smile I had ever seen, was Isabella Swan. Fuck, she was gorgeous.

"Emmett!" She called, way too happy to see me.