Disclaimer: Not mine.
His Calling
Chapter 17
Are You Snogging Mum?
Rhea paced in front of the fireplace waiting for Remus. The clock on the wall showed it was almost noon and she knew he was always up with the dawn on the nights he transfigured, unable to sleep though the pain. Knowing Minerva, she thought bitterly, he would be locked up and not have someone waiting, then chided herself for thinking poorly of her.
She stomped to the kitchen and flung his breakfast in the sink along with all his favourite foods, now ruined, cold and hard. Sitting heavily at the table, she laid her head down on her arms to wait. Another hour passed before the floo activated and she hurried out in the sitting room to find John Dawlish brushing off his clothing.
"John," she hurried to him and flung her arms around his neck. "He's not home yet and I am worried to death."
"I would have heard if there were an accident, and you would have heard if he were ill," he gently chided her. "Do you want me to leave?"
"No, but I don't want him to walk in and see us together until I have time to talk to him." She stepped back and smoothed her hair. "I'm sorry, John."
"How about a cup of that coffee I smell? I've had my share of tea today."
"Right this way." She grinned and returned to the kitchen, hearing him follow and sit at the table to wait for her.
"Have you been thinking about what I asked?"
"You know I have, but it's not a good time now."
"Never is with you." He took the cup from her and sat it on the table in front of him. "Can't just keep putting it off."
"What if I said I like things the way they are?" she asked, looking down at the tabletop.
"I'd say that I don't."
"What if it's all I can give you now?"
"I'd say the kid is going to find out sooner or later anyway. It's never going to be a good time."
"John, you know what he is. You know you he is unregistered. It could affect your job, your friends, just everything. I don't want you waking up a year from now and resenting us."
"Then I find a new job and if my friends give a damn they aren't worth keeping anyway." He grinned and leaned back in the chair. "Don't you dare say I'm too old to find a new job."
"It's nothing to laugh about."
"Before the summer is out, bloody hell woman, before the week is out, I want an answer."
The floo activated and Remus tumbled out, tripping over his trunk and spilling his backpack in the soot and grime. Rhea grinned at John and jumped up, running to the next room
"Mum, I'm home!"
"I can see that," she hugged him tightly, then wrinkled her nose and pushed him back. "You smell like a dustbin."
"Professor McGonagall let me use her floo and it stinks."
"Well, you sit yourself down at the table and let me feed you then it's off to the bath for you." She brushed off her clothes. "And don't touch anything."
"Hi." He grinned at John as he climbed up to the table. "So, you and my Mum been snogging?"
John snorted coffee from his nose as Rhea shouted at Remus from the doorway.
"What? Grownups are always snogging. Peter says so."
"It must be true if Peter says so." John fought not to laugh as he wiped the front of his shirt.
"Remus, you apologise to Mr. Dawlish."
"What'd I say?" He saw his mother's scowl and swallowed hard. "Mr. Dawlish, I am sorry you are not snogging my Mum."
"Remus Lupin you go to your room at once!" Rhea stood stiffly with her arm flung out pointing to the stairs.
"Witches get like that when you talk about snogging." John leaned over the table and whispered loud enough for Rhea to hear. "They don't always mind the doing, just the talking about it. You best remember this when you get older."
"John Dawlish!"
Remus looked up at John and grinned, ignoring Rhea completely. "You been staying here, shagging?"
"Now, that is a completely different matter, as you well know, and for that you do owe your mother an apology. I think that bath without lunch is in order." John looked directly at Remus with an expression that clearly showed he no longer found humour in the conversation, and would not accept no for an answer.
Remus slunk up stairs, casting looks at his mother as he walked passed her, clearly upset with the way his homecoming was going. His resentment with this man, who sat in the kitchen and could talk to him this way, was evident on his face.
"John, he has never acted like this, I don't know what's got into him."
"He has never spent nearly a year living with boys either," John smirked. "Should have seen your face when he asked if we were snogging."
"Should have seen your own when he asked if we …" She turned away from him, no longer smiling. "My gods, how can I tell him about you now?"
"Rhea, he is a boy." John laughed. "You should be glad he feels free to talk openly with you … well, all but the last comment that I plan on talking to him about."
"You will do no…"
"Yes I will Rhea. He is at the age he needs to be able to talk about things. Unless, of course, you want him to learn about sex from Peter."
"We live on a farm. He knows how things happen."
"Really? You know Rhea, if he had asked … Are you staying here because you love my Mum?… or even… Do you like my Mum? … I would believe you. But he didn't."
"He should know…"
"I agree," he stood up and pulled her to him. "He should know, but at his age he doesn't. At his age shagging and love aren't connected."
"Just how much to you plan on telling him?"
"I am not going to give him instructions on foreplay if that's what you're asking." He fought not to laugh at her. "And I won't spend the night when he's home, you know better."
"He will be confused because of… John, his wolf-self is older. More mature. That's why werewolves don't live as long as we do, they age faster. It's as if he has two biological clocks, one wolf, one human. So unless you know something of animals and their mating habits you may not be the one to have this talk with him."
"Since Greyback isn't on the short list of sources of information it's up to us, Rhea," he whispered, and tipped up her chin. "I told you I wanted to marry you. Did you for one minute think that in anyway excluded accepting your son as mine?"
"You're not my Dad! You never will be either!" Remus stood on the stairs looking down, then rushed down, pushing the wizard away and put himself in front of his mother snarling as John tired to regain his footing.
"Remus, don't," Rhea gasped.
"Lad, we can talk…"
"No," Remus dropped his head and looked up under his brows. "You don't touch her, you leave her alone."
Rhea flinched at the sound of his voice, the lower timbre, the near snarl.
"Calm down." John raised his hands, palms out looking up at Rhea as if for help.
"No one can be my Dad, my Dad loved me. Tell him Mum, tell him to go home."
"I was there Remus, I know." John kept his voice even and firm. He saw Remus dip his head further and tilt it to the side.
"Sometimes," John squatted down in front of the boy, "the day before and the day after the full moon you can still feel it's pull. Some believe that the further north the harder it's felt. Others say there's nothing to it, just things that people who don't know what they are talking about say. What do you think?"
"Shut up!" Remus yelled, then turned and buried his face in his mother's chest. "You don't know, you don't know nothing."
"You can teach me, and I can show you some books I bought on werewolves."
"Why'd you do that? Buy books?" Remus looked back under his arm at John.
"Because I love a witch, whose son just so happens to be one, and I thought one day I may have need of them."
"We don't need you," Remus' voice hitched. "Tell him Mum. Tell him we don't need him."
"Ah, baby don't," Rhea hugged him tightly looking at John over the top of his head. "Sometimes we want what we don't need, Honey. Sometimes that want is just as important."
"More important than me?" He ran his sleeve over his eyes and looked up at her.
"No baby." She turned her eyes to John and saw his nod as he walked into the sitting room. "Wait here, okay? I just have to tell him something."
She gently pushed Remus back and ran into the sitting room as John stepped into the floo. She ran in with him and grabbed his arm before he could toss down the powder.
"I love you." She felt tears well in the bottom of her eyes. "I know I've not said it aloud before now, but I do love you."
He traced her mouth with the pad of his thumb and sighed. "I'll have that talk with him, but Rhea, know this…you give me an answer when I am done or this is over. It's not right to fool him, and it's not right to do this to us."
She stepped backwards out of the floo and watched as he left before turning back to the kitchen. It was a week before she saw John walking towards the house again. She glanced at Remus who sat on the floor, his head bent over a book on charms and spells, knowing that John had not used the floo because of the familiarity it would show.
"Remus? Company is coming. I expect you to watch your manners."
Remus looked up from his book and craned his neck to see out the window. Seeing John, he pressed his lips together and put his head back down to the book. She opened the door and jerked her head towards Remus.
"Hi Scout," John called out to him. "Did your Mum tell you we were going fishing?"
"Wizards don't fish," Remus muttered without looking up.
"Could have told me that before I made a fool of myself looking for the … tackle I think they called it."
Remus turned his head and looked at what John carried and snorted. "Those are sissy poles. Not like my Dad's. He had fly rods for trout, and a whole box of flies. Got burnt up at the old place. He knew what to do, he was a Muggle."
"We could catch some for dinner," John said hopefully, before seeing Rhea's smirk and the shake of her head. "Or not."
"You stupid or something?"
John put his hand on Rhea's arm, and shook his head, not wanting her to take issue with the boy's rude behaviour.
"When it comes to fishing seems I am. Thought you could show me. Your Mum said she used to fry up what you and your dad brought home."
"Yeah, but you'll never get one with those old poles. Maybe a cat-fish, that's all they're good for."
"I hear cat-fish is good eating."
"Well, you heard wrong." Remus pouted. "Like I said, you must be stupid."
"Okay kid." John set the poles by the door and shooed Rhea from the room. "This is how it's going to work. I talk you listen. You ask a question, I do the best I can to answer it. You are polite to me and I don't turn you over my knee."
"My Dad never spanked me!"
"No, and I guess you never called him stupid either."
"No but I…"
"And you never hinted that your mother was not a respectable witch."
"No, but I didn't mean it."
"Boy, when you put a word out there, you can't call it back… no, this is where I talk and you listen remember? You say something like that and it hurts her a little. After a time all the little hurts add up and it's too big to fix. Now you go in there and apologise for what you said the other day."
"Guess you want one to."
"No." John looked at him evenly. "I won't ask for an apology for the truth, but she gets one for the way you treated her."
"You and my Mum?" Remus whispered, his eyes growing round.
"I want to marry her, boy. She has the idea she should sit here alone from September to June waiting for you. I don't think she should."
"What about me. Peter says …"
"Peter's folks are divorced and making fools of themselves. You can tell him that. Ain't no call to push and shove him between their arguments. This is your home, and that is your mother in there, I suspect with her ear to the door trying to hear what we are saying." He grinned seeing Remus peek over his shoulder and nod. "I can never be your Dad. I can be like a dad, and would like it if someday you could call me that. Anthony, was your dad, always will be. Nothing can ever change that and no one should ever try."
"What did she say?"
"Won't tell me until you say it's okay."
"And if I say no."
"Then I will tell her you are too young to know what's going on, just a stupid little no account kid that she should ignore. I'll try to make her miss me so much she can't stand it. Then I'll wait until you leave and come crawling back to make her change her mind."
"How?"
"I have no idea, but begging sounds right."
"Cat fish isn't so bad," Remus bit his lip and looked at the door.
"Let me just go snog your Mum goodbye and we can get out of here."
"Ewww, why'd you say that?"
"Before the day is done I'm going to say a lot more than that," he muttered, thinking this was not such a good idea. "Take the poles and wait outside, okay?"
Remus scrambled up with a grin toward the kitchen, he grabbed the fishing gear, rushed outside, and let the door slam behind him.
"John?" Rhea stepped back into the room, casting a worried look at the door, making sure Remus wasn't listening. "I'm not sure that was the wisest way to … you know… you … you could have lied."
"Lied?"
"Oh, John, you have a lot to learn about children and their parents having sex. I don't know if you are the one to have this talk with him."
"Too late," he grinned. "Rhea, I don't know what girls talked about for nine months locked up in Hogwarts, but I can tell you what he and his friends talked about, and it wasn't all about fly fishing and how much they missed their mothers. At least I may be able to tell him that a girl doesn't think looking at dead animals in the Forbidden Forest makes a great first date."
"You didn't," she grinned.
"Bloody hell, at thirteen I thought it great fun to poke dead rabbits with a stick and see how hard they were. I thought girls were strange because they didn't want to."
"John, don't share that story."
"We'll be fine, Rhea. Then it's up to you."
"I know." She crossed over to him and stood in front of him, peeking at the door before wrapping her arms around his neck. "You've been gone a week and I can't sleep."
"I thought we could do it before he heads back."
"Do it?" She looked at him horrified.
"Marry, not shag woman." He laughed, and when he saw her nod, pulled her into a kiss.
"John," she pulled away and looked at him nervously. "If we do this, and I want to, I really do, but if we do, we should keep it quiet. Not a true secret, just… quiet, not talk of it. I should keep my old name."
"Still afraid of the Ministry?"
"Yes. If we can't agree on this, then the answer will be no. It's the only demand I'll make of you."
"Well, then let them all think I am shagging Mrs. Lupin," he grinned and kissed her one more time on the forehead before releasing her and joining Remus outside.
They walked to the stream that cut through the back of the property, and Remus showed John how to bait his hook and weight the line. Laying the poles on the bank, the lines drifting in the water they stood looking at the slow moving current. Remus squatted down and looked up at John, pointing to tracks in the mud.
They followed the delicate fox tracks until they disappeared, then returned to the poles and sat back on the bank. They talked and bantered, John trying to answer his questions, and posing some of his own about werewolves and transformations. Remus felt a release in talking about his fears. Fears he hid from his mother and Madam Pomfrey. Fears that one day he couldn't return. Fears that one day we would remain trapped in the body of the wolf or lose his human voice.
John finally managed to swing the conversation around to what he had come for, and thought he did rather well until Remus frowned and wrinkled his nose.
"You mean even after you get married you want to do that?"
"Umm, well, I've never been married, but yeah… I hope so. Remus, this is not something we need to talk about."
"Will you do it with other witches?"
John looked at him blankly. "Remus, I don't think you understand what I am saying. I love your Mum. I don't want to see any other witches."
"Peter says his Mum and Dad argued all the time about it. He said his Mum was mad because his Dad liked to do it with other witches."
"Is that what's bothering you?" He saw Remus shrug his shoulders, and then nod. "I'll make you a deal."
Remus looked at him from the corner of his eye. "What kind of deal?"
"If I ever hurt her you can bite me." John tried to look serious only to receive a punch in the arm.
"Mum said you helped my Dad that night."
"I got there too late," John frowned. "I don't know many that could have tried to do what he did, Remus. You have every right to be proud of him."
"Will I still be a Lupin?"
"I'd never take your father's name away from you. It's a good name."
"Can I call you John? Sometimes Sirius calls his dad by his name."
"Not to … Yeah, John would work."
"That's my middle name you know."
"Yes, your mother told me it was your Grandfather's as well."
"I guess it would be alright if you hung around."
"I don't want to hang around, Remus."
"Then, you are really going to marry my Mum?"
"If you go get that fish that's dragging your line away we can go ask her." John laughed as Remus scampered to the fishing poles and pulled in dinner. Then draping his arm across his shoulders they walked back to the house.