Disclaimer: Not mine.

His Calling

Chapter 21

A Rat

Remus lay on his stomach peeking out from under the lowest branch of the thorn-bush hedge that separated the cottage from the barn and the fields beyond. His cheeks held fresh scratches, and three thorns poked painfully into his back as his hands held the prickly stems high enough for him to see the path. He did not move and barely breathed. If John found him, there would be hell to pay, but all he needed to do was to reach the bottom of the road that ran to the south. Mum had told him to stay home, sort'a. "I don't think it is a good idea," is really what she'd said when Remus had asked. It may not be a good idea, Remus thought, but she had not said to stay home. Not for sure, not as if she really meant for him to stay home, just that it was not a good idea.

Seeing John's feet kicking up small billowy puffs of dust as he walked by on his way to the barn, Remus held his breath. He waited for the sound of the door's squeaky hinge, then seized the chance and began to run. Once he rounded the curve in the road, and knew he could not be seen from the barn, he smiled widely and slowed his downhill flight slightly.

Sirius waited at the bottom of the hill, hovering on his broom a few inches off the ground, periodically kicking his toes into the ground and pushing up, then sinking down to do it again. The sun was high overhead, and Sirius was impatient. Mrs. Potter had the best lunches and he didn't want to be late.

"Hey?" He frowned seeing Remus on foot. "Where's your broom?"

"My Dad locked it up." He shrugged. "Mum told him it was my fault the cows aren't giving milk again."

"You got to stop doing that," Sirius snorted and scooted forward, making enough room for Remus to climb on the back. "Potter's Mum is letting us meet there. You ever been down to Godrics?"

"Long time ago, is Peter coming?" He leaned into Sirius back as the broom climbed up, to keep the colder sea air off his face.

"Nah, his folks are fighting again and he's stuck at his Gramms. His cousin said he was too much bother and his mum and dad don't want him for the summer." Sirius called over his shoulder. "Course, we could stop by and snag him. You know where it is?"

"I can take you to where I used to live, I don't think the wards were changed, so bet I can still find it, but we have to land on my side of the river and walk in." He reached over Sirius shoulder and pointed the way. "It's about an hour from here, but just outside of Godric."

"Done." Sirius grinned, banking the broom and leaning forward to pick up speed. "He'd better have his own broom."

Remus watched the ground, leaning on Sirius to cut down on the buffeting wind on his face. He at last recognised the landscape below him, and again pointed the way. They followed the stream that flowed to the edge of the two properties and seeing the place where he and Peter used to swim, he told Sirius they would have to set down there.

"Hey, why don't you go on up there and get him. I want to look at the old place."

Sirius looked at him oddly, and then suddenly understanding he nodded. "That's where Greyback killed him isn't it?"

"Yeah, it's … it was my Dad's place. We had to sell…"

"I'll get Peter, meet you up the road." He nodded up the hill toward the Lupin's old place.

Remus took off at a slow run, intending to take a look and move on, only wanting to see the barn to see if it would help him remember his father's face. It was getting harder to remember. Harder to remember the smell of the barn and the way the sun filtered into the kitchen. He wondered briefly if the spring on the door was still fixed, or if it had broken again, and again rang out like a gunshot each time it slammed shut.

"Thought this is where you would be."

Remus snapped his head up from the dirt path and looked at John.

"How'd you know?" he said meekly. "I only wanted to, you know, I wanted to see my friends."

"Thought you may need this. It will give you time to think on the way." John brought out Remus' broom from behind his back. "You get along home now. We will talk when you get back."

"No." Remus stood firm. "I am going with Sirius Black. We are going to see James, his Mum invited us."

"You know what happens tonight, and you know what can happen if you are late." John said roughly. "You want to put your friends in danger?"

"No sir, but I can be home in plenty of time."

"Boy, you are late for dinner almost every day, how can I count on you being on time for something this important?" John watched Remus shrug his shoulders and kick the dirt with his dirty trainer. "Doesn't this Potter kid live up at Godric? What if you are recognised? Don't you think…"

"No one knows me. When I visited Grams she kept me inside, no one would know who I am, and even if they did so what?"

"I am not concerned about the Muggles boy, I am concerned about the pure-bloods. Godric is full of fools. I don't want you there, that's final. Unless I have assurances that you are safe you are not going."

"He'll be safe." Sirius lowered his broom to the ground, followed by Peter. "Mrs. Potter makes us stay inside, sir. She would never let us up there unless she could trust us."

"You must be Black." John looked him over. "Lot like your father, but I see your mother too."

"Less like him than you think, sir," Sirius said, as he slid off his broom. "You see sir, we want Moony to be there. We plan on doing some studying over the summer we thought he could help with."

Remus held his breath as his new nickname slid off Sirius tongue and hung in the air. He saw John's face become hard, his jaw clench tight and knew if he had been Sirius he would have just earned a whole summer in his room.

"I see," John said so softly Remus knew the back of his hand was getting ready to fly.

Remus had only ever see John this angry once before and cringed knowing he was at that place again. The day in Diagon when a piece of fudge had found its way into Remus' pocket and he could not think of a good enough reason for the small miracle of suddenly appearing candy, he had tasted knuckles before being dragged back in the shop and forced to apologize.

John's eyes turned from Sirius to Peter who stood nervously by the side of the road, looking like he wanted to be anywhere but in front of Dawlish. "Boy, you Pettigrew's son?"

"Yes, sir," he squeaked, knowing if Remus was in trouble he would be next.

"Whose idea was this?" John now bore down on Remus.

"No one's." Remus shrugged his shoulders and peeked up at John.

"Mine." Sirius stepped forward, placing himself between John and Remus. "You see we just thought about Remus being up there all by himself and thought it may be fun to get him."

"Who is Moony?" John asked, stepping to the side and watching Remus' face.

"Our friend, sir." Sirius did not back down, and stepped to the side as well. "We thought today would be a good day to keep his mind off things."

John snapped his eyes back to Sirius and then took in Peter's hunched shoulders and lowered head. Rounding on Remus he clenched his fists and took a step forward.

"No, Dad," Remus said quickly. "They found out. I didn't tell 'em. They just found out."

"You were careless, you…"

"No, Dad." Remus backed up at the same time Sirius shouted, "No, it's my fault, really. I got this book and guessed."

"You guessed?" John said incredulously.

"No, Dad." Remus put his arm across Sirius' chest and shook his head. "It was bad and I left my clothes and stuff on the floor when I got in the shower. It was real bad that time and he helped me. He helped me Dad."

John nodded, and swallowed hard. He had seen Remus the last time the moon was full. He had heard not only the screams and howls but the bone grating on bone and had left Rhea watching him as he had left to vomit behind the barn.

"It's getting better, at least the coming back part is. But I couldn't move my hands Dad, I couldn't do my buttons and he helped me, even helped me get on my trousers."

John nodded again and reached up to Sirius shoulder, giving it a squeeze, before glaring at Remus. "So now you have to tell your mother your secret is out."

"She'll blame me." Peter blanched. "She'll think because I lived 'cross the river I knew and ratted him out."

"Ratted him?" Sirius smirked. "I thought you were going to rat with him tonight."

"Shut up, Black," Peter sniggered.

"So, anyway," Sirius said. "We know. See? We know he has to be back. We'll make sure he gets back in plenty of time. We got to right? I mean if we don't it will be our arses that get hung out. Right?"

"Language, Mr. Black." John felt his lip twitch as a sense of relief lightened the air. "Remus, just this once I will tell your mother I gave you permission to go with your friends. I will also tell her I allowed this because you promised to never, never leave on the day of a full moon again. Am I clear?"

"Yes, sir." He grinned and reached for his broom.

"No." John pulled the broom back and grinned at Sirius. "I think Mr. Black deserves to deliver you himself. If you are late, it is not a mistake he is apt to repeat. Do you agree, Mr. Black?"

"I'll have him back in time." Sirius swung his leg over his broom and nodded to Peter to do the same, no fear in his voice. "Come on … Moony."

Remus looked at John and slipped onto the back of the broom, unable to read the man's face. He didn't know if he had hell to pay when he got home, or if this was one of those times his mother would cry and wring her hands and John would stand behind her and put his finger to his lips telling him to be quiet.

"He seems like he's an okay guy," Sirius called back over his shoulder as they sped out of John's sight. "Thought he was going to trash you there for a moment."

"Nah," Remus tried to sound confident. "He don't hit, not really."

"Peter's does. You see how green he got? Thought he was going to puke on you dad's shoes."

Remus chuckled, craned his neck to see in front of Sirius and saw Peter flying upside down. "He's nutters."

"Yeah?" Sirius laughed. "Hang on."

Soon Sirius, like Peter, was speeding to the ground, upside down, their legs wrapped around the broom and Remus holding on to Sirius cursing at the boy in front of him.

"Bloody hell, Black. I got nothing to hold onto back there." He seethed as they came to a landing.

"Ah shut up, Lupin," Sirius chided. "If you want I'll let you in the front on the way back."

"He can use my broom." Peter grinned widely. "Come on, we got to show you."

"Nah, I smell lunch. James' Mum always fixes fish-n-chips when I come. Just like the Muggles fix. Put's vinegar on it too, not that lemon like they got in Diagon."

"My Mum used to take me to the Muggle places when we went to the museums," Remus said. "One place, they ate eels."

"Did not," Sirius laughed as he shrunk down his broom, tucked it in his pocket and reached out, took Peter's and did the same.

"We are going to get caught," Remus whined. "Why'd ya go use magic? Brooms are bad enough, but with 'em moving it's one thing, but plain old magic is going to get us caught."

"Black's do what they want." He laughed. "It's just the … just some that still can't use under-age magic. Dad has a charm he uses. Lots of the kids use it. Peter may be able to real soon. From what my dad says, his dad joining Riddle's club too."

"Come on, Black." Peter headed over the low rise in the field. "We are going to be late."

"How far?" Remus asked.

Peter raised his hand and pointed across the field. "There, the white house, on the left. We come this way cuz we can use the back door."

Remus looked to his right, and saw the cemetery where his dad must be buried. Looking at the chapel he had knelt in on Sundays he lifted his eyes and tried to see his grandmother's house that should be about three streets up.

"Muggles." Sirius said. "That side of town is mostly Muggle now. Never used to be, but it's a place a lot of mudbloods and mixed couples live. There are a few old families, like yours and Potter's. Only the old Muggles live on that side."

Remus looked at him oddly and saw him shrug. "I'm a Black."

"What's that mean?" Remus hurried to catch up with him and Peter.

"It means you get your summers free and I get lessons on what it means to be pure. Now hurry up, I'm hungry."

.

.

Rhea was furious, with Remus as well as John. She warded her bedroom door and started pulling her clothes out of the cupboard shrinking them down and packing them into a sack that she then shrunk in turn. Shoving it into her pocket, she unwarded the door and opened it, intending to pack Remus' room next. She found John sitting on the hall floor, twirling his wand in his fingers, patiently waiting.

"You are not stopping me," she hissed.

"Wouldn't think of it, my dear." He waved his hand toward Remus' room. "He shouldn't have much left. Took most of it up to Hogwarts."

She stomped into her son's room and again warded the door closed behind her. She started to shrink his bedding, then looked to the top of his desk and saw the framed picture of Anthony. He smiled, waved and turned to look at someone just out of range of the camera's lens, then smiled, waved and turned again. She felt her breath hitch, knowing it was her he was looking at and Remus that had taken the picture. She flicked her wand at it and levitated it to the sack she had designated for Remus.

When she finished she strode to the kitchen, ignoring John who still waited on the hallway floor, and began to take what she needed. Turning to the sitting room, she found her way blocked as John now stood leaning in the doorway.

"What confuses me at the moment is that you are packing your own things rather than mine."

"Shut up." She tried to push him out of the way only to have him grab her arms.

"If my wife is leaving me I have the right to know why."

"You know why."

"No, I am afraid I don't. I don't understand how you think you can take my son from here."

"He is not yours," she spat. "He is mine and I won't lose him. Not him, I won't lose another one."

"He is my son now, Rhea. I told you that when we started this. I take you I take your kid."

"You let him go off. You left him with those kids. Don't you know what can happen? You just lost any chance you had to be his father!"

"Yes, I think I do know what can happen. He can start acting like a boy again. Rhea, when I first caught him I wanted to throttle him. I could have taken off my belt and beat him within an inch of his life. Do you understand? Do you understand that it would not have solved anything, no more than running away will?"

"He was never like this before. He never, never disobeyed me. Then you came along and …"

"He is growing up! He is a boy! He's not going to be content sitting at your fucking knee making tea! He has to learn how to be a boy first if you ever expect him to be a man."

"If he gets a chance to, if you don't get him killed first. You don't understand what it is to lose a son. You never had one, you don't understand!"

"No, Rhea." He released her arms and stepped back. "I guess you are right. I must not understand."

He walked to the door and took his robes off the hook. "I will send for my things. You can't leave here. In case you have forgotten he needs the barn."

She heard the sound of apparation before slumping into one of the kitchen chairs. He didn't understand. He would never understand. She took the sacks back upstairs and put her and Remus' things back then started to pack John's clothes. She had never noticed how little he had, or how few personal items he had brought into her life. Wondering if he still had his place in Diagon, she put his things in the back of the cupboard, she would have them ready when he sent for them.

That night Rhea sat in the far corner of the barn and watched her son, for the second time seeing him as she had seen Marcus. She leaned her head back against the rough wooden wall as Remus paced from one end of his tether only to have it snap him back and send him pacing in the opposite direction. His yellow eyes held nothing of the boy she knew. This was the wolf, the full-grown vicious wolf that he would now and forever after become. She watched as he lowered his head and looked at the back door, and then raised his head to sniff the air.

Leaning forward to better see the door she thought she saw a shadow, blocking out for just a moment the sight of the moon. Gripping her wand tightly, she raised up onto her feet, staying in a low crouch. She saw John slip in, stand against the wall, squat down, and pull what appeared to be a small rat from his pocket. She watched him release it to the floor and grin, looking over to her and winking.

Without waiting for more, she stood and ran to him, letting her arms go around his waist and her head fall to his shoulder. "I love you John Dawlish but sometimes you make me so angry I want to scream."

"I know," he sighed. "I'm still learning how to do this father thing."

"I didn't mean it." She pulled away far enough to look up at him. "Please, John. You have to believe I didn't mean it. I was scared. Those boys scare me."

He laughed and pulled her down to sit on the floor. "This is what that son of yours… of ours… has been up to. Watch."

The wolf lay on its belly, its head between its paws, snarling at the two sitting near the door, sniffing the air and smelling them. They were warm, and he could smell the female's saltiness. It whined and pulled against the chain, a low growl starting in its throat. Suddenly, Rhea saw a small brown rat run into the circle of light that surrounded Remus' tethering pole and nip at the tip of the wolf's tail. The wolf yelped, came to its feet and turned back to catch its own tail as the rat scurried outside of the light, circled around and came in for another nip at the wolf's front right paw.

The wolf let go of its tail and hopped sideways, tilting its head and whining, watching the rat scurry back out of sight. The rat came back into the light, just out of the wolf's reach and sat up on its haunches, its whiskers twitching. Rhea laughed as the rat rolled over on its back, and the wolf let out a bark, stepping quickly backwards, looking at it quizzically and lowering its head to push at it with its nose. The rat scrambled up and darted between the front legs of the wolf, causing it to drop its head and look back, under its own belly.

"John," she giggled. "Where ever did you find a rat that wouldn't run from him?"

"I didn't. He found me."

"How?"

"Peter." He pulled her back against his chest. "Do you still think his friends will fail him?"

"Peter sent you a trained rat?"

"No, Peter is a rat … I mean is the rat."

"That's Peter?" she gasped and looked back as the rat ran around the pole, the wolf in hot pursuit, winding the tether shorter and shorter.

"Yup, that funny little kid that you think will turn on him. What do you think? You think I should beat them both with my belt?"

"No," she sighed. "Just me, Merlin, I was such a fool."

"No, if I wanted a submissive I would have gone after Peter's mom, I hear she likes …"

"Shut up." She reddened and looked back over at the rat and wolf. "Remus may not be able to hear you, but Peter can. You want him to think you are after his mother? Or that we … you know."

"Like kinky sex? Trust me. To kids that age any kind of sex their parents have is kinky."

The wolf was tied around the pole, giving the rat a chance to dart to the watering dish and lap up a few fast mouthfuls before it took off in the opposite direction, unwrapping the tether and letting the wolf again be as free as he was allowed to be.

"I think he needs his own water dish." Rhea stood up and started for the door.

"Stay here." John stood up with her. "You know better than to go out in a full moon. You also know better than to keep the door open."

Just then, they heard a yelp and turned back to see Peter nip at the Wolfs soft underbelly before running as fast as it could out of the circle of light and behind a bale of straw.

"Peter?" Rhea called. "Peter, come out. Are you hurt?"

"I got a problem, Mrs. Lupin." He peeked his head around the bale and crooked his finger at John.

"It's Mrs. Dawlish now," John smirked and shrugged of his robes. "Mrs. Dawlish, would you please turn around?"

Rhea grinned and faced the wall while John gave Peter his robe to wrap up in. "Left my clothes on your back step. I still have to figure out how to do it with clothes on. That's the tricky part the book says you got to transfigure your clothes at the same time."

"So, it was your broom he came home on." Rhea folded her arms and scowled down at him. "You do know this isn't safe."

"Yeah, well… Sirius, he thought of that, so he said he would come and get me round midnight."

"And how does he plan to do that? Just thought I would ask since it is a full moon out tonight and both of you know better than to be running the country side."

"Side-a-long, Sirius does it really good."

"I didn't hear that." John rubbed the bridge of his nose. "Peter, you do know I am an Auror?"

"Yeah, but James said you couldn't be a real Auror, you know because of Remus and all."

Rhea snorted and put her hand over her mouth as she tried to hide her amusement watching John's face go from disbelief to anger and back to disbelief.

"You my little rat friend can tell Sirius and James in no uncertain terms that under-age magic applies to everyone."

Peter smiled and stood a little taller, proud to be called 'friend' by an adult. John looked at him sternly not understanding how Peter could stand in front of him grinning at the same time he was scolding him. Turning to Rhea, he held up his arms, palms up, pleading for help.

"Pete." she put her hands on his shoulders and smiled at him. "I want to thank you for playing with … Remus. For making this a little easier for him but it is dangerous. Not only for you, but for all you boys, and for Remus. If you get caught using magic, and you will, Remus will be found out."

"If we are careful…"

"No." Rhea shook her head. "You remember Remus' dad? You don't think he was careful going after a werewolf? Or me? And, still look what happened. Peter, when he is like this he is not Remus, he is the wolf. It's not like when you change. His mind changes too."

"The got potions and things that…"

"You said that Sirius is coming at midnight?" John stepped in to stop Rhea from starting on her social injustice rant with a just turned thirteen Hogwarts student.

"Yeah, he is meeting me up by the house, where I left my … shite."

"Exactly, Mr. Pettigrew. I could not have put it myself better." John frowned. "Rhea, as soon as we step outside, ward the door, and you Mr. Pettigrew are to stay with me, and stay close."

After Peter had left and John returned, they sat until sunlight when Remus began to return. John tipped up Rhea's face and kissed her softly.

"I should be going now."

"Why? John I told you I was sorry, that I didn't mean it."

"When I wasn't here, when Remus got back, what did you tell him?"

When Rhea turned away, unable to answer him he kissed the top of her head and stood up. "Thought as much. No Rhea, you explain yourself to him first. I won't put him between us. And I won't have him growing up thinking the only reason I am here is to fuck you. No, you listen…you told him why you sent me away, now you tell him why I am coming back. He has to hear it from you."

A/N: For the few that are reviewing I thank you...for those that are not.. now would be a good time... Thanks.