Warning: These one-shots feature heavy subjects, including alcoholism, drug abuse, and torture... so far. Now adding: depression, cheating, heartbreak, underage, implied prostitution, suicidal thoughts, someone having acid thrown on them, smut, implied rape/non-con. I'll add more as the story wears on, just in case.

Disclaimer: Credit goes to HannahSongla for the story idea. Please go check out her Hayniss story similar to this - Sweetheart. Credit goes to Suzanne Collins for the verse and the characters. I don't really own anything but the text of these one-shots. And no, that doesn't mean the song lyrics or the playlist. Enjoy c:

AN: Sorry it's been so long! I'm back with some AWFUL chapters because I still have NO inspiration but I promise I'm back and I'm going to push myself until something good comes of this. So sorry, guys.

Song: Waiting Game by Banks

Waiting Game

I'm thinking it over
The way you make me feel all sexy
But it's causing me shame

She fell in love with him the second he turned those worn and beaten gray eyes on her. The torturous story behind them enthralled her, had her hanging on every action or syllable that escaped his chapped lips. They were the color of slate, grey dotted with blue and they shined in the sunlight with something captivating. They possessed an unreleased animalism, something feral and wild and unkept that she couldn't quite put her finger on. But they were also weak and exhausted, worn from years of being trapped in 'the life'. They seemed aged beyond their years, like they'd seen things that no human should ever see. There were a million years worth of age hidden in those blue specks.

The rest of him didn't stand out very much - he was an average man with graying locks in his greasy dark hair and a slouch that could only be cured by spinal reconstruction. It appeared as if he was trying to curl in on himself, to disappear into a never-ending black hole. He was always swaying - recalling a time in which he'd been able to stand straight without appearing as if he'd fall over... well, that was impossible. It wasn't hard to guess that he was drunk when she'd first seen him. A small curve had formed in his stomach from years of drinking and more often than not, his clothes weren't clean. Crusted vomit or liquor splashes ran down the front, rings of sweat near his collar and underarms.

To her, somehow, he was mesmerizing, and she didn't know why. All she knew is that one day, she would be able to become one with him. Was it possessive to say that she wanted him, wanted to be the only girl he ever looked at and opened up to and showed that wild, feral, untameable side to?

Maybe it was. She didn't care.

Katniss was, in short, torn. On the one hand she had this enthralling character of a man, this mystery that had yet to be figured out, this puzzle that needed to be put together... this person that made her feel alive and excited and fresh and new. But on the other hand she had the only person that could save her life, that could save her family's life.

Her happiness or theirs. The question that hung in the balance - the elephant in the room.

It was a problem because, when she closed her eyes, she saw Haymitch. She saw laughter and kisses and a strange little dark haired, grey eyed girl with lots of energy and happiness. But she also saw fire and despair and death and rubble. She saw ash - she saw a phoenix of life.

But when Katniss truly looked inside of herself, when she rooted into the depths of her mind, she did not see Haymitch. She saw alcohol and misery and a boy with blue eyes who looked at her with sadness and pity. She did not see laughter or kisses or the little girl of happiness. Nor did she see the despair and the death and the destruction around her. She saw herself - consumed in darkness while everything... everyone around her thrived in the light.

Her happiness or theirs.

And if she chose neither? Katniss shudders. It feels wrong to think of it that way. Choosing neither the man with the bottle or the boy with the bread. It feels like she's not only betraying her heart, but betraying everyone who relied on her. That was out of the question - Katniss' conscience couldn't hold that much for some odd reason.

She needed to choose. That was final. And she didn't know what to do - find her way to happiness through sorrow and loss, or discover sorrow through loss at the expense of other's happiness. Choose the man she loved over the boy that could save lives. Choose the boy that would save her sister, save her mother, save the entire country or the man that would kill them all and yet somehow make her feel on top of the world.

"Your happiness or theirs, Katniss. You need to choose."

"Mine, Haymitch. Always mine."

I wanna lean on your shoulder
I wish I was in love
But I don't want to cause any pain