Disclaimer: Not mine.

His Calling

Chapter 55

Assignments and Confrontations

Remus winced as he landed outside the gates of Hogwarts. His right arm ached from the bite he had inflicted on himself and he knew from the burning of his left calf that the fight with Greyback had not left him as uninjured as he had thought. Limping slowly up to the castle, he was not surprised to see Albus open the doors.

"Poppy is waiting," he said, peering over his spectacles.

"I am here to see you, but if you don't mind I think I will head up to the infirmary," Remus ground out between his teeth, trying to hide the pain he felt. "I hate to intrude on her. Since I left school, I find myself somewhat…at a loss…the day after the moon."

"No need to apologise, you are an old habit of hers," Albus chuckled. "Summer is almost over and she will soon have students to tend. Until that time she looks forward to your monthly visits."

"Walk with me Headmaster? I have something to ask Poppy and want you to hear it as well."

Albus scowled and nodded his consent, falling into step beside the young wizard.

"I remember the first day of term, Snape and I would head up here while everyone else was in the Great Hall. It's the only time I ever saw it so quiet up here."

"Ah, yes, Mr. Snape. He has been accepted into a very prestigious apprentice program and will soon have a title of his own."

"What kind of apprenticeship?"

"He is quite gifted in potions," Albus said slowly, watching Remus from the corner of his eye. "Although I do wonder in which direction he will take his knowledge."

"Yeah, well if he stayed away from that Malfoy I know Lily would be happier. Did you hear? About Potter and Evans?"

"Your friends were here to see me as well as Miss Evans. They have expressed the same interest in joining the Order as you."

"Who else from our year?"

"As of now, none. That is not to say that Voldemort has not been so unlucky."

Remus stopped and turned to Albus. "Who? Who would…Snape? Him and Mulciber?"

"Mr. Mulciber and we are still confirming Mr. Wilkes. We have no word on Mr. Snape at this time. However one does wonder as to whom is paying for his schooling," Albus said quietly and began walking again. "You do understand this information goes no further."

Remus greeted Poppy with a warm hug and once she had convinced him to drop his trousers and don a hospital gown, she did what she could to begin the healing process. The wounds would take a long time to heal and leave scars as all wounds by magical creatures did. He told her and Albus about his night on the Spencer farm, beginning at finding the female wolves and finishing when he arrived at the gates outside of Hogwarts.

"Anyway, I was hoping you could talk to them." He looked at Poppy sheepishly. "I don't know what else to say. Merlin, Poppy, if they ask me a question I'll get them killed if I give them the wrong information."

"Albus?" Poppy turned to the Headmaster. "You know they will bring in a vet if they register and without registering they will not get the potion."

"Bloody hell," Remus grimaced. "Being Muggles they don't stand a chance."

"Now, now." Albus folded his arms behind his back and studied Poppy. "Do you have the expertise to perform the sterilization here?"

"There is a certain Healer that will help. He is a vocal opponent of the …"

"No," Remus interrupted. "If he is a known dissident, and they show up already sterilized it can fall right back on him."

"As I was saying," Poppy spoke louder, "of the French Ministry."

"Go see the girls and do what you might." Albus patted her on the arm. "Remus, I need to hear more about the encampment. Perhaps you can draw a simple map?"

"One more thing," Remus said with a shrug. "The old farm is empty. It wouldn't matter if they stay there."

"We shall see," the Headmaster said softly. "However, there are other places I can send them."

"That would be better," Remus slid off the examining table and grabbed his clothes. "I was wondering, is there anyway the procedure can be reversed? You know, in case a cure is ever found."

"I am afraid not," Poppy sighed. "Perhaps that is something that will change as well."

"Thanks, Poppy. You know it is foolish to give them a procedure when every month the change alone would stop them from having children. When you see them, would you hold out some hope? It's important, it's all we have."

After dressing, Remus and Dumbledore sat in the Headmaster's office, studying old track maps of the area until Remus could point out where the encampment laid. Cautioning Albus that the map was so old and that the creek had changed course, He drew lines to show the new flow and circled the areas that were now devoid of brush or woods.

"I want you to forget we had this conversation," Dumbledore said evenly.

"What are you going to do?"

"That, Mr. Lupin, is no longer your concern." Dumbledore scowled at him.

"The woman in the shed…"

"Mr. Lupin," Dumbledore said as he stood, "I will thank you for your information. Furthermore, I do not want this information shared."

Remus swallowed hard and had no choice but to accept what Albus said. "There has to be more encampments. If what has been in the Prophet is correct, the number of attacks has escalated and if Poppy's correct, and the potion to speed the change does exist …that means Greyback is amassing quite an army."

"At one time you claimed to have run into Greyback and several Muggles in Hogsmeade. Did you not?"

Dumbledore opened his desk drawer and pulled out a galleon, handed it to Remus and leaned back in his chair. "Make sure when you give that to Aberforth you place it in his hand and not on the counter. He will know you have joined us."

"Abs? He wasn't at the…"

"Aberforth will do as Aberforth wants as will Mrs. Weasley. She is not a…true member and comes to every meeting, he who is a member shuns them," Dumbledore said evenly. "However, make no mistake as to his loyalty to the Order."

Remus headed to Potter's place before going to the Hogshead. He needed to sleep and hoped that there was something in the fridge to eat besides eggs and sausage. Letting himself into the back door, he rummaged around in the kitchen, finding not even that. He grabbed a jug of mild and drank from the bottle, downing it at one go.

"We have glasses," Lily said from the doorway.

"Takes too long." Remus ran his sleeve over his mouth and grinned at her. "I hear congratulations are in order."

"Thanks." She headed for the sink and began putting on a pot of tea. "James thinks you are against it."

"Ah, Lily, no," he said tiredly, slumping into one to the kitchen chairs. "I just hate to think what you are setting yourself up for. It's just that you would be safer to stay with you folks until this is over."

"What about your girl, Lucy? Don't you want her here with you?"

"That's not fair," he said frowning at her. "I'm not like James. I don't have a place or my own. I can't rent a place…bloody hell…if they knew I was even seeing her they would…they'd stop it."

"It's true? What James says? That they would give you a potion?"

"That, or an operation," he barked out a snort of laughter. "Kind -a puts a whole new spin on the term safe sex."

"You could bring her here. I talked to…"

"Stay out of it." He stood and put the empty jug in the bin. "Sirius awake yet? If not I'm going to crash on the sofa."

"He left hours ago. You should eat first. Sit." She went to the fridge and started to pull out what she needed.

"Don't bother," he said with a loud sigh as he stood. "I'm too bloody tired to eat."

"Go up and use Sirius' room. He won't be back until late…if then. He said something about heading down to London."

"Thanks," he said heading for the stairs. "Lily? Did he take the bike?"

"Yeah," she chuckled. "I think that's the only reason he's going. He wants to ride."

"Something's bothering him. Has he said anything about his brother?"

"He won't talk about him," Lily said with a shrug of her shoulders. "Remus, where do you stay when you are not here?"

"Around." He ran his hand over his face and yawned, not willing to tell her he most often camped by the stream behind Hogsmeade or stopped into The Three Broomsticks to do some odd work for a meal. "Listen, I'm dead on my feet…"

"Sorry, go."

Once he woke and grabbed a sandwich, he headed down to the Hogshead where he took up a corner table and waited until Aberforth kicked him out for the night. For the next several days that was where he could be found, nursing a glass of ale and occasionally accepting a bowl of soup form Abs. Not only did he not see Greyback, but could tell that none of the men that came in was a Muggle changed Werewolf.

He borrowed Aberforth's owl and sent a note to James, asking him to meet him the next day. Waiting impatiently, he kept looking at the clock on the back wall wondering if James would even be on time for his own wedding. Finally, forty-five minutes late, James arrogantly sauntered in and plopped down opposite Remus.

"What's up with you?" Remus said, not able to stop grinning.

"Sorry I'm late. I was hung up at Gringotts. You are now looking at the sole heir of the Potter fortune. Seems even the Black fortune was mixed in but the goblins got it cleared up." James grinned and pulled out two bags of gold that he slid across the table to Remus. "I also have your potion on order. It should be here tomorrow."

"I can't take that," Remus frowned pushing the bags back. "I'll make my own way."

'So, how is it working so far? You look like bloody hell and smell worse. Listen, Moony, if you don't take that I'll have to explain it to Lily. Frankly, if she cuts me off I am going to blame it on you. Now just put it in your pocket and I'll put it on your tab if that makes it easier."

"You know I'll never be able to pay you back."

"I have plenty of room at the house. Lily had the idea of turning the study into a bedroom. That would free up a room and we want you in it."

"I…I don't think so," Remus muttered. "I am there enough as it is."

"Then find a place," James said seriously. "You can't go on like this."

"I appreciate the offer, Prongs, I truly do," Remus sighed and shook his head. "Let's see how it plays out. I have a couple of ideas about getting work. I can tutor or something that doesn't demand regular hours. I can't keep taking your money."

"I don't care about that. I have a vault full…more than I can send in a lifetime. Bloody hell, more than Lily can send and that girl loves to shop. Now take it and shut up before I start screaming werewolf. Now, what did you want me to come here for?"

Remus put the bags in his pocket avoiding James' eyes. He desperately needed the money and knew he would use a few galleons to visit Lucy, something he had not dared to think of before. Nodding his thanks, he launched into his need for a list of all Wizard owned properties that were either isolated or large enough to be considered a true farm.

"I don't know where to start."

"I was thinking that if you go to the Ministry, Moody may be able to help. Him or John."

"If they even keep his kind of record. Bloody hell, Moony, can't you just use my cellar?"

"No, it's easier for me to be outside. I just need someplace I know Muggles won't be around." Remus lied easily.

"I've only been at your place," James said slowly. "Maybe on the registration records? You know, a werewolf would be more inclined to be registered to a farm."

"I want a list of wizard farms not registered." Remus said evenly.

"Hey, Aberforth," James yelled across the room. "Got the Daily Prophet yet?"

"Don't see it do ya?"

James rolled his eyes and turned back to Remus. "Friendly cuss isn't he? Would this have anything to do with the Ministry raid on the Spencer place?"

Remus leaned back in his chair as James told him about the lead story in the morning's edition of the Prophet. A squad of Aurors had raided the Spencer farm. Based on an anonymous lead, they'd had reason to believe that a group of renegade werewolves was holding Muggles captive. Not only had the information been correct, the owner of the property and his sister-in-law had been found guilty of aiding and abetting unregistered werewolves.

"Isn't that Lucy's mum?" James asked.

"Yeah," Remus muttered. "Did it say how many others were arrested? The Werewolves? Any names given?"

"No names, just that there was seven werewolves and the two Spencers."

"Azkaban?"

"For the Spencers, didn't say anything about the others."James watched Remus carefully. "You need to tell Lucy before she finds out on her own."

"I know," Remus muttered. "Merlin, Prongs, how do I tell her this?"

"Listen, Moony, if the Ministry gets hold of her first it will scare the bloody hell out of her. She needs to be warned…and it is her mum, right or wrong she needs to know."

"If they talk to her it will take them less than five minutes to know she doesn't know what's going on," Remus said evenly.

"You two not having problems, are you?"

"Nothing more than what happens once a month."

"She doesn't care about that, Moony. Give her a chance."

"If you can get me that information I'd appreciate it." Remus stood and threw down a galleon on the table for his drinks. "I'll be here every day this week."

Three days later Remus was sitting in the Hogshead when James sauntered in and tossed a piece of parchment on the table as he pulled out a chair and sat down. Grinning, he watched Remus read the list of Wizard owned farms.

"It was simple after Moody called me an idiot," James laughed. "Hogwarts has information on all their students. When you enrolled, your mum had to list your home address and your father's occupation, stuff like that. Once I got the list of kids whose fathers were listed as farmers, and the addresses, Moody was able to find out which ones were registered, only two. Do you believe that? Merlin, I would think more than that would be used. Anyway, that leaves only those."

"Fourteen. Even if I take the Spencer place…Prongs, you have my old place on here. So if I take off those two that still leaves a year's worth of…places I can use."

"What is this about? If I didn't know better, I'd say you're looking for something. Something like what was in the Prophet."

"Let it go," Remus said as he finished reading the list.

"The Spencers were given to the Dementors and from what Moody says the whole lot was sent to Azkaban. Your dad is partitioning to probate their holdings."

"Can they do that? While they are still alive?"

"Guess so." James shrugged. "Lily says she'll make curry tonight if you come."

"No, I want to…I thought I would head across the channel."

"Have you seen your Mum?"

Remus shook his head. "I'm not even sure if it's Greyback, or the Dark Fucker that she needs to be hiding from. She hid a werewolf, Greyback has a grudge against the Lupin family and Fucker Head hates anyone that's affiliated with Muggles. I would think since my father died they could forget she had married a Muggle."

"I think she needs a holiday. Her and John need to get out…you know…maybe something far enough away to be off the radar."

"What are you talking about?" Remus frowned.

"I was talking to John the other day and happened to mention the Oktoberfest. He seemed interested. I wouldn't be surprise at all if he and Rhea took a trip."

The day after the next full moon, Remus showed up at Rosmerta's back door asking to use her shower and sleep for a few hours. He insisted on working for payment and after he was finished kissed her on the cheek and headed up to Hogwarts. Now that he was part of the Order, he thought it prudent to inform Albus of his whereabouts at all times. The Headmaster gave him a charmed pocket watch that would strike the hour if he was needed and would work as a portkey to bring him home.

Arriving at Lucy's door late that same day, he hesitated before knocking, taking a moment to collect his thoughts and still wondering how to tell her what had happened. He heard muted music and her voice singing along to a song he was unfamiliar with as he raised his hand and pounded. Grinning at her response, yelling at the door to be patient, he still found it surprising that she would use English after living here for so long.

"What do you…" She yanked the door open ready to take issue with whoever was disturbing her when she froze. "Remus?"

"I think so," he grinned, engulfing her in his arms as she threw herself at him. "If it's not me I want to know if you greet everyone this way."

"Only werewolves and Englishmen," she sobbed into his neck. "Come in; hurry before the neighbours come out."

Waiting until the door closed, he again he grabbed her arms and yanked her to him, kissing her hungrily. "Circe, I've missed you. You have no idea how much."

"You look awful," she said, wincing at the pressure on her arms, pulling away far enough to look into his face. "You lost weight."

"You'll have to fatten me up." He grinned and leaned down to kiss her again. "You, however, look as beautiful as the day I first saw you."

"Stop," she said, grabbing his hand and dragging him into the kitchen. "After you eat you shower then sleep."

"Only if you sleep with me," he said grinning.

"I mean it, you look like shite." She pointed to the table and told him to sit as she started pulling things out of the fridge. "When was the last time you ate?"

"Just before I came." He muttered. "I'm not hungry."

"And before that how long?" She tuned and put her hands on her hips. "Do you eat every day? More than a bowl of soup down at Rosmerta's?"

"Between you and Lily I'm beginning to think all women want fat men." He stood and pulled her to him again. "Now stop. I'm fine."

"How long can you stay this time?"

"When is the next moon?"

"And then?"

"And then we will talk about it again." He became suddenly serious, knowing he could not put off what he needed to tell her.

Sitting on the sofa with his arm around her shoulder, he was surprised at how she took the news of her mother, not showing much emotion until he told her of the punishment that had been doled out, the kiss of the Dementor and the life sentence in Azkaban. He let her cry, not trying to console her, thinking it better that she allow herself to grieve and try to put it behind her.

"I think I knew all along but didn't want to admit it," she said, sighing deeply. "I guess Rhea can say I told you so now."

"Don't, she was worried. She didn't …."

"I know," Lucy interrupted him. "Was she the one that took my letters? You said you never got any of them. Was it her? My own mother?"

"I think so." He sat on the edge of the cushion and turned to watch her. "Rhea and John are planning a holiday. I want you to see them with me."

"It's late," she said, avoiding the question. "Let's sleep on it."

"I'm going to stretch out right here," he said, patting the sofa. "You go on. I'll catch you in the morning."

"Why? Is something wrong? Something I …why?"

He gently took her hand and traced his finger over a bruise that was forming on her upper arm. "This was from me. I told you once that I wouldn't touch you the day before or the day after. Do you understand now?"

The month went smoothly. When Rhea and John came, they would visit late into the evening while Lucy stayed busy in the kitchen or retired to her bedroom on the pretence of studying. The only time they were together and forced into conversation was at tea when Lucy tried to bite her tongue and Remus would watch her out of the corner of his eye, as if waiting for an explosion that Lucy was determined would not come. John found the silence between the women tiresome and tried to fill the gaps, unsuccessfully coaxing them to talk. Taking his opportunity the last night of their visit he shooed Remus and Rhea into the sitting room and helped Lucy clear the table.

"She means well," he said, picking up the plates and flatware. "She is worried about him."

"She is worried about what people will say if they find out he stays here," Lucy said as she slammed the pots into the sink and began scrubbing them.

"She's his mother," John said quietly as if this explained everything.

"Then she should be happy for him."

"She won't be happy until the war is over, he is safe and…he is accepted."

"You know that will never happen. We can pretend all we want but it will never happen," she said evenly, turning to study his face. "Do you think this is all I want? Do you think I like being alone all the time? Waiting for him to decide to come here for a few days? A week? A month? How do you think it makes me feel every time he runs off and I don't know when or if he'll come back this time? One day he will go back and I will never see him again. I know it. I know he won't stay with me!"

"Lucy!" Remus scowled at her from the doorway. "That's enough."

Lucy pushed passed him as she fled to the bedroom, throwing herself across the bed and sobbing. She lay still, listening to the muted voices in the next room until she heard Rhea and John leave and Remus come into the room.

"We need to talk." He said, sitting on the edge of the bed.

"No," she pouted.

"Why did you say that? Do you truly believe I will leave you?"

"Remus?" She sat up and faced him. "When is my birthday?"

"What? I…umm, in the… in the summer?"

"January. Do you know what I am studying?"

"Lucy, don't do this…I'm not…"

"Ancient Languages. Do you have any idea what I do when you aren't here?"

"I know you like coffee in the morning instead of tea. You take it black. You like jasmine oil in your bath water and you adore those little yellow flowers that grow on the south slope. Lucy, I'm not good at things like birthdays and stuff like that." He leaned forward to kiss her cheek, not surprised when she turned her head away.

"I do nothing. I go from here to school and back. I graduate in a month. Did you even know that?" She said flatly, swinging her legs over the edge of the bed and turning her back to him. "I have a couple of job offers I have to sort out."

"How long have you known?" he asked quietly.

"For a month. I was waiting for a good time to bring it up."

"Go on."

"One is in Omsk, at the Dostoyevsky Museum of Literature. I thought I might take it."

"And the other?"

"In London."

"Which you don't want."

"No. I won't go back there."

"Then…it's Russia."

"Yes, I think so," she said quietly.

"Lucy," he said softly as he rose and walked around the bed to take her in his arms. "I can't give you more. I can't promise you that I will always be there for you. What I can promise you is that I'll try."

"It would be easy if I didn't love you," she sighed, leaning into his chest. "Sometimes I wish I didn't. It's hard."

"You never complained before."

"I keep hoping something will change. That we can…that something will change."

"Marry?"He tipped her chin up and met her eyes.

"Have a family."

He gently pushed her away and turned away from her. "I told you that will never happen."

"Will you be here for my graduation? I would like it if you could. You are all I have now and I want someone there." She changed the topic and started to ready for bed.

"Lucy, you need to understand…"

"No, I need to accept it." She smiled thinly. "I understand it completely. So, you agree that a move to Omsk wouldn't be too far? That you would still be able to make the trip?"

"I'll…no, not too far at all. It will take two port keys, but it's doable." He watched her slip her nightgown over her head fighting to keep her emotions in check. "I'll try to make the graduation. What day is it on?"

"The sixteenth," she looked up at him biting her lip, knowing it was also the day of the full moon.

"I guess I'm free," he grinned. "Care for another broom ride to the cabin?"

She started around the bed to him when she heard a timepiece, confused she looked around the room and saw Remus pick up his robes and sling them over his shoulders.

"I have to leave," he muttered.

"It's the Headmaster?" She ran to him and threw her arms around his neck. "Come back. Be careful and come back. It's enough…it's enough for me. Please, just be careful."

"Always," he said, gently pushing her away as the port key spun him away.