Disclaimer: Not mine.

His Calling

Chapter 56

Death

Remus was pulling his wand out as his feet touched the ground. He dropped to his knees as his eyes swept the field in front of him, momentarily confused and disorientated at finding himself alone until the sound of apparation filled the air.

"Boy!"Moody's voice called out. "You're my second. Fall in."

Remus ran to stand behind and to the left of Moody as he watched others take up positions in the field. "What's going on?"

"Getting out some Muggles tangled up in there." he nodded towards a small dark house on the edge of the field. "You take what you can and get them the bloody hell out of here. Head for the Hogshead, out back in the alley."

Remus nodded and glanced over his shoulder, seeing Black in full run behind Gideon leaving Prongs to follow the other Prewett brother. John appeared beside him with Peter, not acknowledging him as he sprinted to the north side of the dark house.

The front door burst open as all hell broke loose. Death Eaters ran out throwing hexes and apparating away. He heard Moody curse and throw up the anti-apparation spell too late as he set up a shield in front of him, spinning to the side to find where a stray curse had come from. He saw movement in the trees but was unable to see clearly. Dropping to one knee and sent a ball of fire to hover over the spot, lighting up the sky and making it clear that the Muggles had been herded outside.

"Fuck, don't know if that's all of 'em," Moody snorted, charging up the steps. Knowing that if the Muggles were outside something had changed since they had been briefed, but following through with the directive to clear the structure. "Gideon, get them out of here."

John and Peter ran to cover the pair sent into the woods as curses filled the air and the sound of children crying above the screams of their mothers lent an unholy air to the battle. Remus felt un-nerved and clutched his wand tighter, shutting out the sounds and concentrating on Moody. These were not the sounds of battle. Not of the war he thought he was fighting. These were the sounds of impending slaughter of innocents.

He kept his eyes on Moody's back, determined not to botch his first duel. When the old man went forward so did Remus. When he moved to the right Remus threw a hex to the left, step for step he matched the Auror only to find nothing in the house.

"Where's the fucking cellar?"Moody muttered. "Find it. There's a reason they want us to go after the ones in the woods."

Remus muttered Lumos and began searching the floor for an indication a trap door. Running into what he assumed had been the kitchen he found it and called Moody. Together they pulled open the door and let it fall open before sending down a globe of light ahead of them.

"Don't hurt them…please…take me…take me but let them go." A young woman sobbed, puling against ropes that held her fast to the wall.

Remus turned in a circle, lighting every inch of the cellar as Moody squatted down and untied her. "We are getting you out of here."

"Moody?" Remus nodded to the far wall where two children sat huddled together.

"Did they get you yet?" Moody grabbed the woman's head and twisted it to the right and then to the left. "Looks good."

"No," she whispered. "This…this man with a mask on…he's crazy…help me…he said he was bringing…bringing someone…something back to…to…"

"Damned Muggles," Moody pulled her up. "Think werewolves and vampires are made up stories? Get them out of here boy."

Remus swung a boy around to this back, telling him to hold on as he pulled the girl up on his hip, throwing his free arm around the woman as Moody pushed her into him. He closed his eyes and spun out to the alley behind Hogshead, hoping that he could get them all there in one piece. He landed hard, falling to his knees as a pain ripped through his head, causing him to let up his grip on the girl. He took deep breaths, listening to the woman vomit onto the ground. Opening his eyes, he glanced at them, making sure they had made it whole, before he closed his own eyes and sucked in gulps of fresh air.

"I'll take them from here," Molly Weasley said calmly. "Now come dear, you and the children are just fine. Why tomorrow you'll wake up and not even remember this."

"I need to get back," Remus panted, digging for his pocket watch.

"You stay right where you are. You won't do any one any good in that condition." Molly said as she wrapped blankets around the three Muggles. "Who were you with that he let you bring out so many? No, forget it, it was that fool Moody."

"Who," Remus grinned. "Him or me?"

"Both, him for telling you to do it and you for trying. Could have lost all three."

Gideon and Black appeared, each with a Muggle in tow, followed by Peter and James with two more. Soon the small alley was full of wailing Muggles until Fabian put up a silencing spell. Molly took all her charges and sat them against the back of the building assuring them that they were safe and tending to minor cuts and scratches.

"Bloody Vampires," Moody spat as his feet touched down. "The fucking Death Eaters are feeding them. We were told it was the bloody wolves again."

John appeared and sagged to the ground, blood running down his face. "Something's wrong. It was too easy."

"They wanted us there," Fabian agreed.

"Get these people home," Moody said to Molly. "Arthur knows the memory spells. Just make sure they are clean. Don't need more…"

"That's enough." Molly stopped him from saying more, hoping that the Muggles did not understand what had happened.

"There's a debriefing." Moody spat on the ground and jerked his head toward John. "Busted his head open on a branch."

"Shut up," John muttered. "It was dark out there. Someone pushed me into it."

"You better get to St. Mungo's," Molly said, examining his brow. "Too close to your eye for me to mess with. If you wait for Arthur and Frank I'll take you myself."

"You know how to get to The Burrow?" Gideon asked Remus.

"The Burrow? No, I…" Remus said confused.

"The Weasley place." Moody shook is head. "Tag along with Black. He's been there."

Remus found Black squatted down in front of one of the children, trying unsuccessfully to get a name.

"Don't know where to take her back to." Sirius looked up at Remus and shrugged his shoulders.

"Her mum probably told her not to talk to strangers," Remus grinned. "Leave her for Molly."

"Right. You seen Prongs?"

"I think he went inside for a drink with Wormtail and that Marlene chick."

"Merlin," Sirius ran his hand through his hair. "Just what we need our first time out. Peter can't drink and walk let alone Apparate."

They collected the pair and after telling them, they were to report to The Burrow, Peter and James left as Sirius took Remus in a side-a-long. Sirius slapped Remus on the back when he saw his look of surprise upon seeing the structure the Weasleys called home.

"Something isn't it?"

"Merlin," Remus grinned. "How does it stay up?"

"Don't let Molly hear you say anything against it. That's one witch you don't want to cross."

"Wouldn't think of it." Remus said, reaching for the door.

"Moony," Black said quietly, reaching out and stopping Remus. "Did you get a good look at any of them?"

"No, they were gone before I was …"

"No, the two…in the woods. Did you see them?"

"What's wrong?"

"The one in the back, tall…he had his mask on, for what they are worth. I didn't pay much attention at first…but...fuck. He had me dead to rights and never threw a curse. Just…just didn't do it."

"Scared?"

"No, he…he was open. He had a clean shot. Then he just stood there, any one of us could have taken him down. He just lowered his wand and stepped back. He didn't even try to fight us. I think it was Snape."

"You sure?"

"No, just…the way he moved, the way he held his wand. I…I would swear to it."

Remus studied Black's face and saw the turmoil he was going through. "And the other one? Who was it?"

"My brother."

"You have to tell the Order. At least what you think…if you didn't see his face you can't be certain."

"Why else didn't they take me out?"

The door opened suddenly, revealing Minerva, who stepped to the side and waved them in. "We want to get home some time tonight gentlemen."

Sitting in the kitchen with platters of sandwiches and a seemingly never ending pot of tea the discussed the nights work, going over every detail, dwelling on what had gone wrong. Moody was furious that the anti-apparation spell had not been used before they had arrived. All eyes went to Peter who shrugged and explained that he had a hard time finding John, causing their lateness.

"I will discuss the matter with Mr. Dawlish when he returns from St. Mungo's," Albus said frowning. "This will not happen again. Six slipped through our fingers tonight."

"Eight," Sirius muttered, looking at Remus. "There were two watching the Muggles they had taken outside."

He explained what he had seen, including the description of the Death Eaters, and his impressions of who they were. He was only half way through his identification when the Headmaster raised his hand, silencing him.

"We only use positive identifications, Mr. Black. They have fooled us before, with disastrous results. It is not unlike them to plant the seed of doubt amongst our ranks to benefit from our own confusion. Until this is verified, this will go no further. What we need to focus on is the woman left in the cellar and determine why she and her children were the ones they kept."

"She's a Crabbe," Arthur said walking into the kitchen and kissing Molly on the cheek. "At least her mum was before she married a Muggle. We stopped by at the Ministry and looked up the records. Neither one of the children are magical nor is she so it wouldn't be obvious."

"Poor child," Molly sighed. "Pulled into this with nary a reason as to the why."

"It was a bloody ruse," Moody spat. "You mark my words. Something else was up they didn't want us available for."

"I agree," Albus said solemnly. "We need to add to our ranks. That, or agree to go in at half strength."

"No," Molly said loudly. "You will not send them in unprotected!"

"We do that or don't answer every call for help," Gideon argued. "Should we have left them there to be sucked dry because we wanted to wait for more information?"

"We only needed…four at the most," Black offered.

"Didn't know that 'fore we rushed in," Moody spat.

The argument with on with no resolution until Minerva announced the meeting closed. Remus waited to talk to Albus. Explaining what he wanted the Headmaster to reset the pocket watch to take him back to Lucy and give him the spell to reset it as soon as he arrived.

"Before you leave I need a moment." Albus said, leading him back into the kitchen where Molly was making a pot of tea. "Do you agree with Mr. Black?"

"I went inside…not to the woods."

"That is not what I asked." Albus peered over his spectacles.

"He's known his brother was going to join them for a couple of years now and I would guess that even with robes and those pitiful masks they wear he could recognize him. Snape? I don't know, sir. I guess I would be more surprised that they would put two of the younger troops together. We both know Snape can fight, it's not that but wouldn't they do the same a you? Pair them with someone else?"

"He is known for sacrificing his new recruits. I believe that our mission was discovered prior to our arrival. In which case, Voldemort may have used two of his many to distract us. He is unconcerned about such things as the death of his chosen. By sacrificing two he would lend more importance than there was to this site at the same time sending me a message that he has some measure of control over the youth at my school."

"And now? That we got the Muggles without killing them?"

"He will either see them as heroes or traitors. If it is indeed Mr. Black's brother, you may hope for the first. The later does not survive in his army."

"He is gathering the vampires now," Remus said shaking his head.

"Give my best to your young woman," Albus smiled as he stood up, ending the conversation. "I have always thought she would go far. How delightful that she will soon take top honours in her class."

Remus brought his eyes up and studied Albus' face, seeing his eyes alight with humour. "You've been watching her."

"I told you she would be safe. Have you doubted me?"

"That was years ago."

"And she is still safe. Is she not?" Albus chuckled. "I have taken the liberty of visiting with your mother. A most delightful woman albeit a little…old fashioned. Not that I disagree with her, however in these uncertain times it is understandable."

Remus stood up and held out his hand, shaking Albus' as the old man clasped his in both of his own. "I will ask you, in light of what we have seen today, to double your efforts. There are other…venues that are being used. We must find them."

"The next moon is on the sixteenth," Remus said. "I have someplace to be earlier that day but with the port key it shouldn't be a problem."

At Lucy's graduation, he stood in the back of the hall, watching as Lucy took her place behind the podium and gave a speech to her class. Her eyes kept going to his as she tried to pay attention to the crowd in front of her. She has never looked happier, he thought, never so full of life and anxious to move on. He felt a swell of pride just watching her and knowing that she was his.

"Remus? Is it not?" A young man joined him at the wall.

"Yes," Remus frowned as he looked at the man. "Is it Carl? I think we met."

"Yes, yes," Carl smiled and leaned against the wall, folding his arms and nodding to Lucy. "She was my…how do you say…study mate. My wife's study mate."

"Your wife is here also?"

"Yes, there," he pointed to a woman sitting quietly, her hand on her swollen stomach obvious even with her graduation robes on. "Beautiful, is she not?"

"Beautiful, yes she is. Congratulations."

"We are pleased the baby will be born at home." Carl smiled, his accent slipping away. "Once Lucy leaves for her job assignment there will be no way of tracing her. She will be quite safe."

Remus ginned and lowered his chin until it was resting on his chest. "I thank you. Does she know it was you?"

"No, she would be…let's just say angry does not come close." He chuckled and received a glare from his wife, who held up a finger to her lips.

"Is Carl your real name?"

"No." He nodded and pushed away from the wall. "I hope we never meet again."

Remus nodded and watched as he walked off before turning his attention to Lucy and the swell of applause that filled the room. Once the diplomas were handed out, she ran to him and threw her arms around his neck.

"How long can you stay? There is a celebration. Remember? I told you about it so don't give me that look."

"I have a couple of hours left," he said laughing. "And what kind of look am I giving you?"

"The let's go to bed and hang what you want look."

"Not today," he said, tapping the end of her nose with his finger. "Nor is it the best time from me to be with a crowd."

"We can leave early," she said hopefully. "There is every kind of food imaginable and no speeches. I promise. You should eat today, you know how you get."

"Food? Food that I don't have to cook and you don't have to burn?"

She slapped his arm and pulled him along, wrapping her arm around his elbow. "I am happy. Don't go ruining it. Look around, no one knows you here. No one cares. Let's have a good day."

"We need to finish packing and…"

"I'll have all night once you leave. I promise, it'll be done before you get back."

"The movers come on the eighteenth…"

"I know." She rolled her eyes. "We don't have that much left, only a little in the kitchen and my clothes. Please?"

"Oh," he muttered, stopping until she turned to face him, pulling a box from his pocket. "You will have to pack this."

She took the box in both hands looking into his eyes. "You have never given me a gift."

"Now who is ruining it?" He quirked an eyebrow at her.

She opened the box and found a pair of perfectly matched sapphire earrings set in platinum. "My gods…Remus? How?"

"They were my grandmothers," he said, watching her face closely. "If you don't like…"

"No! I love them…I…I have never had anything so beautiful." She handed him the box and took them out one at a time, placing them on her ears. "How do they look?"

"Beautiful, as is the wearer," he said softly as he leaned down and kissed her.

"Come," she giggled as she tugged him along. "Now I have to show them off."

Remus left Lucy at the celebration after eating and drinking until he thought he would never eat another bite. He headed first to Potter's house to change his clothes into something he could no longer wear in public and take his second dose of potion. Lily had a gift ready for him to take back to Lucy and asked a hundred questions about the graduation, explaining the importance of receiving honours to James as she did, rolling her eyes and laughing when he thought it was like completing Hogwarts.

All too soon, Remus felt the tug of the moon and reset the port key to take him to a new destination in search of yet another hiding pace. He arrived at the edge of a pond, damp and dank, a smell of rotting fish and mucky water, unfit to drink and stagnant. He did not have to time to hike to higher ground, striping off his clothes as soon as he arrived and stuffing the now familiar flannel in his mouth he fell to his knees and tried to keep a vision of Lucy in front of him. The wolf sprang up instead, pushing all memory of her away, bristling the yet fully formed hair along its spine, fighting for dominance before Remus had suffered through the worse of the pain. He felt a growl of anger deep in his chest, before the wolf had taken over his jaw. Unable to lift his head he fought the demon inside him, concentrating on holding the wolf at bay, at last changing without screaming in pain.

He sat up on his haunches, panting and tasting the air, sensing others he allowed he wolf it's lead and ran up to firmer ground. Remus saw electric lights in the distance and flattened the wolf to the ground, sniffing the air and trying to see where he was. He fought to keep the wolf down, unable to control it as he had so easily in the past. Confused as to the reason he gave it the freedom to run, relying on the wolf's instinct to keep them safe.

The wolf turned even with the electric lights, running parallel, not getting closer, but not avoiding them. Remus saw a small building in front of him, hidden in the darkness made deeper by the near by lights. The wolf dropped on its stomach, its lip curling up in a snarl as saliva dripped from its mouth. Remus lifted the wolf's head as he inched forward, seeing what he assumed to be a farmer step back in fear, waving a rake in front of him. Following the farmer's eyes, he saw the other wolf.

As if on signal, the other wolf and that which was Remus sped toward the man. Remus launched into the air and took down the other, his teeth sinking into the back of its neck. The other twisted, rolled to the ground, trying to shake of the attacker as Remus gave over to his rage, clamping his teeth harder, tasting blood and hearing his teeth grate against bone as his claws raked its sides, splitting it open and spilling its bowels to the ground. All too soon for the wolf within Remus, the fight was over. It ripped at the dead flesh, pulling it from the bone and tearing at the animal until Remus was sickened and finally able to pull it back in a fit of rage and power.

Remus sat back over his prey and allowed his wolf a howl of victory as the farmer ran in fear. The Muggle's movement caught the wolf's attention, a low rumble of warning spilling out, which Remus fought down as he forced the wolf to turn away from the easy kill. Horrified that he had killed so easily once and that he wanted to again. For a moment, he lost control and almost unleashed the beast on the unwitting farmer before he managed to run. Needing to expend the pent up energy and power that he felt in the creature he could no longer control as easily as he had before.

He prowled he property, staying away from the electrical lights until almost dawn. Finding nothing else, and knowing his time was running short he approached the lit area. He wondered why so many lights blazed all night. Skirting around the perimeter of the corral he looked for signs of more wolves, and then assumed it was fear that kept the lights on all night. Satisfied that it was nothing more, he began to lope over the field, finding his way back to the pond where he left his clothes.

Remus squatted at the edge of the blackish water, trying to wash off the blood that he was covered in. Using the flannel the wiped his face, worried about Lucy's reaction if he showed up looking like he knew he did. With a deep sigh he apparated to Potter's place, thinking it best to clean up before returning home.

"Bloody hell," Black hissed when he opened the door, pushing Remus back into the yard, glancing over his shoulder into the kitchen. "Get your arse over here."

Sirius pulled his wand and hosed Remus down while he scrubbed at his face and hands. "I didn't have clean water…"

"Water? Bloody hell, you don't have a brain. You show up looking like this and even Lily is going to lose it."

"The potion is wrong," Remus explained. "I couldn't control…"

"What happened?" Sirius asked, looking back at the house. "Christ, Moony, what the shite happened?"

"Nothing like what you are thinking," Remus spat.

"Thank Merlin," Black sighed, casting a drying spell.

"There was a werewolf…I don't know who it was…I…it was a wolf."

"Fuck, Remus, don't do this to yourself…it was a ruddy werewolf right?"

"Right. Like me."

"I didn't mean it that way. You know that. Did you kill it?"

"Yeah," Remus whispered.

"Then you killed a wolf. That's all it was. Remember that kid. Just a wolf."

"Sirius?" Lily called from the back door. "Is that Remus? Tell him breakfast is ready. We have plenty."

"How do I look?" Remus licked his lips and swallowed nervously.

"Like shite, but at least the bloods gone. Fuck it man, you can't show up like that. We have to figure something out."

"Yeah, like a cure."Remus started to the house.

"Listen," Black grabbed his arm and yanked him back. "From now on we'll set up a…a changing station someplace. We'll think of something."

"I need to talk to Potter," Remus said, his voice shaking. "Gods, I lost it. I could hardly control him. You don't know. You have no idea how close I was. I could smell his fear. I wanted to…I wanted to …it has to be the potion. It needs to be stronger."

"You didn't," Black said, pulling him into a hug and slapping him on the back. "Now come on and eat before Lily if after us."

After taking the hottest shower he could, Remus changed into the clothing he had arrived in, reducing what he had worn to ash. He used Lily's nailbrush to remove the last of the dried blood from under his fingernails and studying his face and hair in the mirror he finally felt clean enough to go down to eat. He listened to Lily's banter about the upcoming wedding and tried to answer politely, unable to get the sound of his teeth meeting bone and the tearing of flesh from his mind.

"So is that a promise?" Lily asked.

"Sure." Remus snapped his head up from his plate. "What?"

"You will bring Lucy." Lily pressed her lips together in a thin angry line. "You have not heard a word I said."

"Of course I did," he said meekly. "I have to get going."

"Remus? Aren't you waiting to see James? He should be back soon."

"No, give him my best and tell him I plan on getting drunk at his wedding," Remus grinned. "I'll talk to Lucy but I have to see Albus before I head back."

He waited in the Headmaster's office, pacing in front of the fireplace, imagining every creek in the floor as footfalls on the steps. Running his hand through his hair, he stood at the window and looked out on the grounds, losing himself in memories.

"I seemed much simpler when you were a student." The Headmaster said, stepping out of the fireplace and waving Remus to the chair opposite him.

"I was just thinking of all the times I sat here before," Remus grinned. "Why you never kicked us out is beyond me."

"Peter had no home to go to. His was a sad family, one fraught with jealousy and no room for a child." Albus sighed heavily. "As for Mr. Black he would now be with his brother, or dead. It was clear to see from an early age the battle he would have with himself."

"And Potter?"

"Yes, Mr. Potter," Albus sighed. "I must say it took the death of his parents for him to grow up. However, grow up he did. Unfortunately it took far too long and much harsher circumstanced that I had hoped for."

"And I? The experiment?"

"That and my own guilt for not seeing what had happened to Marcus." He picked up a dish of lemon drops and offered one to Remus. "I have made many mistakes in my time here, and before, and I am afraid they shall not be my last."

"Sir, last night something happened."

Albus held up his hand to silence him and shook his head. "It has been brought to my attention that there was an incident involving a werewolf attack. It seems a man's life hung in the balance. He claims another wolf interceded and killed one that would have taken his life."

"Who was it," Remus said, leaning forward resting his arms on his legs and looking at the floor.

"Will that make it easier?"

"I don't know. I killed a man. I deserve to know his name."

"Why does that concern you?"

"I could have been me. If I didn't have someone to buy the potion for me, if I didn't have the friends I have…it could have been me." Remus looked up and studied Albus. "Was he a good man? Did he have a family? How old was he? He couldn't help what he was doing! I know that! I know he wasn't on the potion! He was pure wolf."

"Tell me Remus," Albus said, slipping into first name basis. "If you had…killed a human while in your wolf form what would you want done?"

"I would want to die," he choked, feeling the sting of tears.

"Do you think a good man would feel differently?"

"That's not the point. It wasn't my decision to make. It was his."

"The man you saved is a husband, the father of four, and a good man. A man that is a good member of society and although a Muggle, not unaware of us. His youngest child will be joining us next term. Would you rather have lost him?"

"That's unfair. I could have stopped it. I could have…I didn't have to…"

"Kill him? Nevertheless, you did my lad. I cannot pretend to know what you are feeling. However, I do know taking a life takes its toll, that I am not a stranger to."

Remus sighed and leaned back in the chair, running his sleeve over his eyes. "Does it get easier?"

"No, we convince ourselves that the lives we take are taken in the name of good, but we know, deep inside that a death for any reason is a waste. If you did not feel this way I would not trust you and would not have allowed you to join us."

"Moody has…"

"Moody has sat here himself," Albus stood and walked around in front of the desk, sitting on its edge and laying a hand on Remus' shoulder. "It is because of our grief over the loss of an innocent life that makes it all the more important to end this thing as soon as we can."

"Was he an innocent?"

"No," Albus said reluctantly. "I will only tell you that the farmer was not to be his first victim."

"Thank you," Remus said with a sigh as he stood. "I want to get back."

"Of course." The Headmaster walked to the floo and held out the box of powder. "You will travel first to the Broomsticks. I have decided that port keys and apparation to these grounds are no longer safe."

"First I want you to promise me something." Remus said evenly.

"That I will not do," Albus scowled. "To take any life is…"

"You owe it to me! To Marcus! To everyone you claim to protect. You owe me this!"

Albus clasped his hands behind his back slowly nodded. "I will see that it is done."

After travelling to the Broomsticks and drinking a cup of tea with Rosmerta, unable to leave until he did so, he arrived back at the apartment that he shared with Lucy. Seeing she had already laid out his blanket and pillow on the sofa, he slumped into a chair and lowered his head to his hands.

"Remus? You are so late I didn't think you were coming back tonight."

"Sorry. Something came up."

She started towards him, then remembering his constant reprimands about approaching him the day after a full moon hung back in the doorway. "What's wrong?'

"Nothing, go to bed. Get away from me."

"Remus? Look at me. You're lying."

He lifted his head and saw her standing framed by the light shinning in the room behind her. Without thinking, he stood and crossed to her, pulling her to his chest and hungrily covering her mouth with his.

"I need you," he choked into her mouth. "I've never needed you as much as I do right now."

"What's wrong," she said, fear lacing her words and she pushed against his chest enough to look into his face. "Talk to me!"

"I feel like I'm dying," he nearly sobbed as his lips crashed down on hers again.

She led him into the bedroom, dropped her nightgown to the floor and slipped under the covers, holding the blanket up until he stripped down and joined her. There were no tender words this time. No playful caresses or smouldering kisses. He didn't wait for her to reach his level of arousal or even care if she were ready to accept him. He took her with a hunger and passion that scared her. He claimed her with a fervour that had her close to calling out to make him stop. Watching his face, she knew he was not making love to her but driving out demons that he could not reach and was using her to find them. Wrapping her arms around his back, she held onto him, digging her fingernails into his flesh as he lost himself in her and she fought to meet him in his release.

As soon as he finished he rolled over and pulled her into his side, forcing her head on this shoulder. He hung onto her so tightly she was afraid to move for fear of angering him. Laying still she finally felt his grip loosen and his breathing even out signalling his sleep. Only then, could she close her eyes and feel safe in his arms. In the morning, she woke to him lifting back the sheets and inspecting her body, a look of disgust and loathing on his face.

"Do I look that bad?" She chided him.

"I'm sorry," he said softly, touching a small bite mark on her shoulder. "You have bruises on your thighs. I don't remember…"

"It's fine. You scared me, but you didn't hurt me."

"Roll over. I want to see your back."

"No, I tell you I am fine."

"Did I…"

"No! I'm fine, truly. It was after, you…Remus? What's wrong? You have never been like that. Even afterwards, you scared me."

"I…I wanted you. I had a bad night and…just…thank you," he kissed her gently. "This won't happen again. I should have known not to come back. I thought I could handle it."

Lucy sat up and looked down at him, pulling up a sheet to her chest. "Thank you? Do you plan on telling me what the fuck this is about?"

"I love you. Do you know that?" He grinned at her and tugged down the sheet, looking at her breasts before he leaned forward, kissing them each in turn. "After all this time and you still are too shy to be naked in front of me."

"You're not telling me. Right?"

"Right." He swung his legs out of the bed and sat up. "Now get up woman. I want breakfast."