"… like the Heimlich, with stripes," Willow said, smiling at Xander. "Very … stimulating."
Cordelia glanced at the others round the table, judging their reaction. Buffy seemed oblivious, Margo and Giles were both unreadable, but Xander looked understandably surprised.
"No doubt, Mistress Willow," Margo said. "I found it so, when I was in Africa."
"Would that be when you were rogue, Dame Margo?" Giles asked.
"I had justification, Mr Giles," Margo said, firmly rebuffing that sally, "or do you believe the spring rites were acceptable?"
"Certainly not, Dame Margo," Giles said. "You know my opinions on needless ceremony. However—"
"I only broke with the council, Mr Giles," Margo said. "I did not break my oaths."
Giles smiled faintly, apparently satisfied. Quite what he had been after, Cordelia wasn't sure, but he'd been probing Margo ever since he got back from the zoo, not just bickering, but digging for a specific answer.
Any other time, Cordelia would have written it off as watcher politics, but for Giles to be probing now, right after the zoo trip, was worrying.
If the hyenas had been a triumph, he'd have been boasting about it to Margo now, in a discreet English way. If they'd been a no-show, he'd have just stayed silent.
Giles had done neither.
Buffy yawned. "You still haven't told us what Harmony did."
"Dame Margo," Giles began "I—"
Cordelia looked at Giles and gently shook her head. He'd already deflected the conversation away from that topic five times; a sixth would risk making Buffy suspicious, and Cordelia didn't really need his protection anyway.
Giles looked carefully at Cordelia, who shook her head again, then he nodded, the movement barely perceptible.
"—am also curious," he went on, "did you make any progress with Xander?"
Xander smiled. "I haven't opened a book all afternoon."
But he had committed himself to spending long hours researching, to help her and Harmony, a victory for Margo, and one Cordelia hadn't noticed until later, when she'd had a chance to think.
That probably wasn't Margo's only unnoticed victory either, she would have taken full advantage of the distraction Harmony's story had created, but this wasn't a good time to think about that. She needed to be thinking about what Margo was doing now, not what she'd done two hours earlier.
"What were you doing?" Buffy asked, looking intently at Xander.
"Ironically," Cordelia said, "he was with me."
Predictably, Buffy and Willow both turned to stare at Cordelia, ensuring neither of them noticed Xander's surprised twitch.
"Ironically?" Willow said.
Cordelia smiled. "Harmony was worried about how much time I've been spending in here, with Xander. She thought we might be getting too close."
Technically true, since Harmony would think a hundred yards too close, but misleading.
"You and Xander?" Buffy said, smiling broadly. "What is she on?"
"She thought chlorofoming me was the best way to get me to listen," Cordelia said. "Tuesday night must have been too much for her."
That should win Harmony some sympathy, and provide an excuse for any discrepancies if Buffy or Willow tried to get Harmony's version.
"She was always weak-willed," Willow said, looking at Buffy.
Barely managing to hide her surprise, Cordelia looked quizzically at Giles who glanced sideways at Margo then grimaced for a split second.
Something had definitely gone wrong with the hyenas.
"Does that matter?" Margo asked, once again probing Willow, as she had been doing since Giles got back.
"No," Xander said. "Harmony needs help."
Cordelia glanced at Xander, wondering if he realised what he'd just done. She wouldn't have thought so, normally, but even Xander couldn't miss the undercurrents in the room, not when ninety percent of the conversation was undercurrent. That would be enough to make anyone nervous, and to prompt Xander to defend Willow from any attack.
"Indeed, Mr Alexander," Margo said, "but not the kind we can give. We can only keep our distance, and hope she recovers."
"That's the kind of advice I like," Buffy said, then scowled. "If she believes Cordy and Xander—"
"There's nothing wrong with Xander," Willow said, looking Buffy straight in the eye. "He's—"
"—not Cordy's type," Buffy said, meeting Willow's gaze head on.
Cordelia suppressed a smile. That confirmed she had got the balance right, imputing motives for Harmony that were neither so implausible Buffy and Willow wouldn't believe Harmony could think that way, despite what they knew she'd been through, nor so plausible that they decided Harmony might be right.
Now, both of them would ascribe the incident to simple jealousy, never coming close to guessing what Cordelia and Xander were concealing. Even when Harmony found out what they believed, there'd be no danger. She wouldn't deny it, she'd confirm it, thinking to use it to smear Cordelia.
That wouldn't work, Cordelia had been able to stay popular when actually dating Xander, so false rumours that she was would be no trouble, but it should keep Harmony too busy to be able to cause real problems.
"I'm not?" Xander said, looking at Cordelia, mock hurt on his face.
"I don't know," Cordelia said slowly, staring frankly at Xander's body, then glancing sideways to monitor Willow's reaction. "You might have some potential."
Willow glared at Cordelia, her hands tensing into fists. "Cordelia—"
"Enough of this frivolity," Margo said. "None of you have any time for romantic entanglements. Maybe in a few years you might, but for now you should be thinking only of how you can aid in the battle."
"I don't remember signing up for that," Xander said, "dame."
Nor did Cordelia, but objecting played into Margo's hands, giving her another opportunity to push her slayer ideology.
"Would you put your carnal pleasure above the good of the world, Mr Alexander?" Margo asked, a question with no good answer.
"They are not watchers, Dame Margo," Giles said. "They—"
"They are in the slayer's world now, Mr Giles, in the thick of the battle," Margo said. "Sacrifices are necessary, if our cause is to prevail. I trust you do not think them too selfish to make them?"
"The slayer's world?" Cordelia said, taking the onus off Giles. "Buffy lives in the same world as the rest of us, dame."
"She lives in the same world as we do, Mistress Cordelia," Margo said. "Most people do not."
"Where do they live then, dame?" Buffy said. "Mars?"
Margo smiled. "Metaphorically speaking, yes."
Cordelia frowned. Margo was clearlly going to base her argument on the claim that a slayer could never have a normal life, which meant she couldn't expect Giles's wholehearted support. He'd back her up a bit, of course, simply to contradict Margo, but he did believe that himself, one of the very few things he agreed with Margo about.
They weren't entirely wrong either. As Giles had said, anyone who knew about the weird stuff would find it difficult to ignore that knowledge, and still be able to live with themselves. For a slayer, it might well be impossible.
None of that mattered though. Buffy could easily slay demons, and still have a normal life. She didn't have to have no normal friends, the way Giles had originally wanted, or be kept in a gilded cage, the way Margo wanted, but convincing Margo of that would be near impossible.
Fortunately, Cordelia didn't have to. Margo would be gone soon. As long as Cordelia stood her ground, not letting Margo squeeze any concessions out of anyone, she couldn't lose.
"Buffy shops, she comes to school, dame," Cordelia said, attacking the axiom. "One day, she'll get a job. She lives in the normal world, just like the rest of us."
"Superficialities," Margo said. "Of no account. We live in a world of primal forces, an island of light adrift in a dark abyss."
"So does everyone else, dame," Willow said.
"Their bodies do," Margo said. "Their minds dwell in a world where the shadows are empty. Buffy doesn't. Nor do any of us for we have sacrificed all chances of a normal life, that they may live free from care."
Xander blinked, then looked sideways at Margo, growing alarm evident on his face.
"They are not watchers, Dame Margo," Giles repeated. "While I would never cast aspersions upon their willingness to serve we would be derelict in our duty if we permitted these innocents to bear so heavy a burden."
"You are correct, Mr Giles," Margo said, and Cordelia winced, anticipating. Margo wouldn't make an admission like that so openly, unless she was going to turn it against Giles. "But the damage is already done, by you."
"Now, Dame—" Giles began, but Margo silenced him with a glance. "When you failed to dissuade the slayer from having friends, you failed in your duty to the innocent. They have taken up our burden now and we can never free them from its crushing weight, nor restore to them a normal life."
"We still do normal stuff, dame," Xander said. "We watch TV, go out, think about dating. We need to, or—"
"A useful safety valve, Mr Alexander," Margo conceded, "provided it does not endanger others. Were you to become besotted with anyone else in this room the ensuing jealousies would somewhat reduce the effectiveness of your teamwork, unnecessarily placing the whole world in jeopardy, and romance with anyone outside this room is unconscionable, since it would expose them to the dangers inherent in your lifestyle."
Excessively pessimistic. Dating non-scoobies might be dangerous for them, as Buffy had found with Owen, but dating each other had proved safe enough in the original history. There had been some minor problems, like that love spell Xander had tried, but nothing really serious.
"Indeed," Margo said, "even having close friends outside this circle may be unwise. Harmony's apparent derangement is not untypical of the fate of those outsiders who spend too long in a watcher's company."
That was almost exactly what Harmony herself had said, but the implication was still untrue. Cordelia could help with the slayer stuff and still have normal friends, without endangering them, no matter what Margo or Harmony thought. As long as Cordelia took reasonable precautions she'd be able to keep her other friends a safe distance from anything weird, just as she had in the original history.
"With respect, Dame Margo," Giles said. "These three are not watchers."
"With respect, Mr Giles," Margo said. "They are like enough to what a watcher should be in the ways that truly matter that they will experience most of the same tribulations as true watchers do, though, given your past association with the miscreant Quentin and his bureauphiliac cronies, perhaps you can be excused for your poor understanding of that."
"Dame Margo, I understand what you are saying," Cordelia said quickly, before Giles could escalate. "I will give it all due consideration."
Or, in plain English, get lost. Margo would know what Cordelia really meant, of course, but she respected the appeance of politeness. Now Cordelia had drawn a firm line Margo wouldn't tackle it head on, she'd wait till the next suitable opportunity then do something tricky.
"Do that, Mistress Cordelia," Margo said, the barest hint of approval in her voice. "In the meantime, we have a reservation at the Le Jardin Noir, for six o'clock. Perhaps, if Mr Giles has nothing else he needs to tell us, you would all like to go and prepare yourselves for this evening."
"Same as last night?" Buffy said.
"Not quite," Margo said. "Would you rather discuss that now or later?"
"Later, dame," Cordelia said. That way, they'd have less time left to discuss sensitive matters.
"Definitely later, dame," Xander agreed, smiling.
------------
"What are we doing up here?" Xander asked, fifteen minutes later. "Why are we sneaking around?"
Cordelia looked both ways, checking the corridor was empty, then passed him the note.
"Ten mins, music room. Talk re zoo & Dame Margo," Xander read. "Who's this from?"
"Giles," Cordelia said. "He slipped it me while we we all leaving the library."
"Shouldn't we get Buffy and Willow then?" Xander said, stepping back towards the stairs.
"No," Cordelia said firmly. "Or I wouldn't have had to sneak you away from them. He'll be wanting to talk about the stuff I told him about what had originally happened at the zoo—"
"—and we can't talk about that with them," Xander said. "How are you going to explain bringing me?"
"You followed me," Cordelia said. "If he knows you know something it'll be easier for you to hide how much you know from him once I tell you and Margo everything I can since then you'll have less to hide from him. You mustn't tell Margo how much Giles knows though, the more he knows that she doesn't know he knows the better he'll look, and you mustn't let either of them know how much the other has told you, or they'll find out everything."
"So we'll know, Margo will know, and Giles will too," Xander muttered, looking slightly confused, "but he won't know Margo knows he knows, Margo won't know how much he knows, and neither of them can know how much I know. What do Buffy and Willow know?"
"Nothing," Cordelia said, "as far as I know, but I don't know how much Willow knows about me, yet."
"You know about that?" Xander said.
Cordelia nodded. "Giles does too."
"Willow was sure no one knew we knew anything."
"If she doesn't know anyone knows she knows she won't be panicked into doing anything rash."
"Why are you telling me all this?" Xander said, showing a glimmer of sense.
"If we tried to pretend you knew nothing, Giles would see straight through you," Cordelia said. "You need to know enough not to give anything away."
And, no less importantly, enmeshing Xander in a web of shared secrets would make it harder for him to go running to Willow, even if he found a loophole in the promise.
"Is that the only reason?" Xander asked, smiling.
"A good question," Cordelia said, smiling back. "We're going to have to spend a lot of time working together. Secrets would get in the way."
Xander looked thoughtfully at Cordelia, then smiled again. "How many secrets do you think Giles will share?"
------------
"We haven't got long," Giles said the moment Cordelia walked into the room, "but—"
Xander walked in.
After a moment's startlement, Giles smiled. "Cordelia show you the note?"
"No," Xander said. "I followed her. Last time she went off alone, she got kidnapped."
"Good," Giles said. "I need to talk to you about this afternoon too."
"About the zoo?" Xander said. "Something happened, didn't it? Willow isn't acting normal, and you weren't telling Margo everything."
Cordelia glanced casually at Giles, checking his response.
"I didn't notice anything unusual," Giles said, glancing sideways at Cordelia, "but you know Willow better than me. Do you think there might be something wrong?"
Good, Giles was going to accept Xander's story. He'd still have some suspicions, of course, but Cordelia knew how to deal with that.
"Yes," Xander said, leaning against a wall. "Do you?"
"If Dame Margo finds out—" Giles began.
"I don't care what she thinks," Xander said. "Willow is my friend."
"And mine," Cordelia said. "If something's gone wrong we'll both help."
That implicit half-truth would be a lot better at misdirecting Giles's suspicions than a flat denial. Claim she'd told Xander nothing and the least slip by him would prove her wrong; imply she'd covertly told him just enough to get him to help and no one slip could prove her wrong, only a slow accumulation of errors over many months, which would give her plenty of time to prepare a back-up defence.
Giles looked at both of them, then sighed. "There was a prophecy, a sestina in early Hittite."
"About Buffy and Willow?" Xander asked.
"About you," Giles said. "It suggested you would be in danger if you went to the zoo."
"What kind of danger?" Cordelia asked. "Could it affect Buffy and Willow?"
"The prophecy was unclear," Giles said.
Xander frowned. "And you didn't tell us because … ?"
"Margo was listening," Giles said. "I warned Buffy and Willow after phoned you. We started to search it together but, when we reached the ape house …"
Giles paused, looking uncomfortable.
"What happened?" Cordelia said. Had there been another mad zookeeper?
"Remember how the blood demon turned your classmates into Australopithicines?" Giles said.
Cordelia nodded.
"They didn't turn back when it died."
"What's tha—" Xander began, then his eyes opened wide in realisation. "You gave them to the zoo!"
"No," Giles said quickly. "The police did. We're taking steps to transfer them to a watcher's care."
Cordelia glared at Giles. "They're people. They shouldn't be in a zoo."
"No," Xander said. "They should be in a, um, … They shouldn't be in a zoo. Get them out of there."
"They will be, tomorrow," Giles said. "I never wanted them to be in the zoo, but the police insisted they had to be escaped animals. There was nothing I could do to stop them."
"Nothing?" Xander said skeptically, but Cordelia believed Giles. There could be no doubt Giles hadn't wanted to send them to the zoo, Giles wasn't that kind of person, but while Xander might still have unconditional faith in Buffy and Giles, Cordelia, being older, knew better. Some mishaps were beyond anyone's ability to prevent.
Giles could easily have prevented Xander and her finding out about that though, simply saying they'd decided to split up so they could search the zoo better. Instead, he'd deliberately exposed his failure.
Whatever Buffy had said when she'd found out must have really hurt Giles if he was willing to look to Xander for absolution. No doubt from anyone else, he would have shrugged it off, since he was English, but Buffy was his slayer and he was already feeling guilty. Margo's steady flow of thinly veiled insults, fostering self-doubt, wouldn't have helped either.
"Sometimes there's nothing that can be done," Cordelia said gently. "I know what that's like."
Xander looked uncertainly at Cordelia, then back at Giles. "As long as he tried his best."
"I did," Giles said. "The mayor's office kept raising spurious objections, until I circumvented them."
Xander frowned. "Shouldn't they be more worried about all the missing children?"
"They didn't seem too bothered," Giles said. "Officially, the victims were all killed by a gas leak."
Xander smiled. "Be embarassing when they all come back then."
"They're not coming back," Giles said. "Their minds were destroyed by the spell. We can't undo that. We can only make them comfortable."
Then they were as good as dead. With neither mind nor memory left, their bodies were empty shells.
"You mean they're going to be like animals for the rest of their lives?" Xander said.
Giles nodded then, before Xander could reply, went on, "Buffy and Willow were not pleased when I told them this."
"And that's how you got separated," Cordelia surmised, directing the conversation away from that sensitive subject. "Do you know what they did next?"
"No," Giles said. "It was an hour before I saw them again, by when they appeared to have forgotten our disagreement."
"They didn't tell us about it either," Xander said. "That's not right. What do you think happened?"
"It's too soon to say," Giles said. "I'll need to consult my books."
"What about Margo?" Xander said. "She did this spell that let us see someone's soul. She'll be able to tell what's wrong."
"If only Willow were affected, I'd tell her immediately," Giles said, "but overtly asking for her help with Buffy for anything short of impending apocalypse would be tantamount to a resignation. The council would consider it irrefutable proof of my inadequacy."
That might not actually get Giles killed, but would still cause a lot of problems.
"I could ask for her help unofficially," Giles said. "but the price of her silence would be high. We could end up with her aides as assistant librarians, and joint watchers."
"We're not doing that," Cordelia said, "unless we have no choice."
It would let Margo get round the agreement Cordelia had spent half the afternoon negotiating, and place Buffy under the Bodsworths' thumb.
"However," Giles said, "Dame Margo will still feel obliged to help us, covertly."
"Then ask you for a favour," Xander said, smiling at Cordelia. He must have been paying attention when she negotiated that clause of the agreement.
"Council protocols forbid her to do that," Giles said, "and she will have sworn to abide by them. In a situation like this she will not even be able to tell us that she's helping us, lest she gain undue influence over us."
"But she's always offering you 'helpful' suggestions," Xander protested.
"That is not the kind of help that is considered likely to compromise my independence," Giles said, smiling wryly. "Dame Margo knows the rules, and she will not break them. As long as I keep my oaths she will not impose her help on us in this matter. The most she'll do is put anything we might need where we can find it."
Which meant another layer of deception; Giles and Margo both pretending that they didn't know the other one knew they knew. Cordelia could cope, of course, but she didn't need the extra stress. It'd be a relief when Margo was gone, and she only had her own plans to keep straight.
Giles paused, then looked at Xander. "Whose soul did you see?"
Xander smiled. "Norman Delapare's. He'll be dead tomorrow."
"She found some?" Giles said. "Where?"
"LA," Cordelia said. "Ten of them, and they all work for the same law firm. Margo's ordered Norman to come here for his trial."
Giles smiled. "A formality. He will die, and his family with him. Did Dame Margo tell you anything about the law firm."
"Agatha's investigating it," Cordelia said, "but Margo played a tape of Norman on the phone. He said he specialised in persuading uncooperative witnesses. I think he meant torture."
"Then his patrons will perish with him," Giles said, then glanced at his watch, "but that isn't why I wanted to talk to you. Do you have permission to tell me anything about what you discussed sub rosa?"
"Cordy got Margo to promise not to interfere with us," Xander said. "Th—"
Xander winced, and fell silent.
"She already has," Giles said, "and she's got what she wants from you."
"What?" Cordelia asked sceptically. Giles couldn't know that; he didn't know the terms of the arrangement.
Giles winced. "I've also had conversations with Dame Margo sub rosa. I can say only that the bill will not come due for twenty years, maybe longer."
"No one can plan that far ahead," Cordelia said.
"Not in any detail," Giles conceded. "Dame Margo is gambling on her chosen horse in a long distance trial, but she is a good judge of form."
Perhaps, but that didn't matter. Cordelia had enough problems already, without worrying about the distant future.
"A horse called Buffy?" Xander suggested.
"I can neither confirm nor deny that," Giles said. "About these Delapares, …"
------------"Have you an alternative suggestion, Mr Alexander?" Margo said.
"We could all stay together, dame," Xander said, picking up the last éclair. "It worked last night."
"We can kill more demons if we split into two groups," Margo said.
"There are thirty-five different ways we could do that evenly, dame," Willow said. "Why—"
"Buffy and Mr Giles must stay together," Margo said. "That leaves fifteen ways. My aides and I can not all be in the same party, since that would leave the other party unobserved, which rules out another three options. Having you, Mistress Cordelia, and Mistress Willow in the same group with only one watcher to safeguard you would be excessively dangerous, leaving only nine options, all of which are variants on one of two options: two of you accompany my two aides or one aide and myself. Either way the third spends the evening with Mr Giles and Buffy, surely no hardship."
"The groups need not be evenly divided, Dame Margo," Giles said.
"Four each sounds good," Cordelia said, before Margo could start ruling out more options. Margo's original proposal sounded good too, but not for any reason she could admit to.
Xander looked thoughtfully at Cordelia as he bit into the éclair, cream splurting over his hands.
"Five-three would be more effective, Dame Margo," Giles said. "If we were to do it your way, Willow would not be able to contribute anything. Keeping her safe—"
"I do not view Mistress Willow as an encumbrance," Margo said. "Nor would I endanger her. She will be safer with us, and Buffy, than she would be with my aides."
Biting into her buttered scone, Cordelia looked across the table at Margo. She knew what she'd get out of Margo's proposal, a chance to talk to the Bodsworths openly, but what did Margo get? With Giles watching she wouldn't be able to do anything with Willow.
"Don't you trust them, dame?" Buffy said.
"Their competence is not in question," Margo said. "It is a simple matter of arithmetic. If Agatha is protecting Mr Alexander, and Wilfred is protecting Mistress Cordelia, who then is left to protect Mistress Willow?"
Xander licked a dollop of cream off the back of his hand. "They can fight, dame?"
"Naturally," Margo said. "We still maintain the old standards."
"All watchers must be men of virtue, Dame Margo?" Giles suggested.
"Old, not archaic, Mr Giles," Margo said. "Standing order seventeen, revision three: all sworn watchers must spend at least one night a week unaccompanied in a place known to be frequented by vampires or demons. Had the miscreant Quentin done so, he might not have fallen into error."
Buffy looked expectantly at Cordelia.
"No, Dame Margo," Giles said. "He might have died instead. That order was repealed for a reason."
"The reasons were insufficient, Mr Giles," Margo said. "Or do you consider the training exercises you were given adequate preparation for the hellmouth?"
"There may be room for improvement, Dame Margo," Giles conceded, "but needlessly endangering lives would not be an improvement."
Cordelia glanced at Xander, who nodded.
"The old policy saved lives, Mr Giles," Margo said, "lives of the innocents whom we are sworn to protect, and it kept the watchers from becoming chateau generals. The new policy makes it a little too easy for watchers to evade their duty."
"The new policy saves more lives, Dame Margo," Giles said. "If I were to regularly go hunting vampires alone, I would soon die, leaving Buffy watcherless for weeks, during which many more innocents would die than I could hope to save."
"An excessively pessimistic view, Mr Giles. Agatha and Wilfred have been doing that for forty years, and they still live. The odds cannot be so bad as you suppose."
Cordelia ostentatiously looked at the empty plates, waiting for the right moment.
"They were not on the hellmouth, Dame Margo,"
"Looks like we've all finished eating," Cordelia said, smiling brightly. "Shouldn't we be getting ready?"
"We should, Mistress Cordelia," Margo said. "If you and Mistress Willow would follow Agatha?"
Cordelia stood up.
"What about me?" Buffy said as Willow stood up.
"I believe we decided last night you would do your duty your way," Margo said. "Neither of us needs to change. Mr Giles, if you and Mr Alexander would care to follow Wilfred?"
"Come along, ladies," Agatha said. "We have no time to waste."
Scowling, Cordelia followed Agatha out of the room and down the corridor.
"Why do you like Margo's plan?" Willow said. "You want to spend the night with Xander?"
"And the Bodsworths?" Cordelia said. "Hardly. This way you get to spend all night asking questions and I don't have to listen to the answers."
Agatha sniffed disdainfully. "With an attitude like that, you will not last long. One should always be willing to learn."
"I am," Cordelia said, provided it was useful, "but it's a lot easier to learn to in a quiet library than out on the streets."
"Sometimes," Agatha said, opening the changing room door. "Tonight's lessons are best learned in the field."
"You're going to teach us something?" Cordelia said, walking over to her bag.
"That depends entirely on you," Agatha said, closing the door behind Willow.
There wasn't much chance of Xander learning much then, which was good. Before he learned how to fight, he would need to learn when not to, despite all that testosterone sloshing around his system.
Willow laughed. "She'll not learn anything then."
"I understand cheerleaders can be quite gymnastic," Agatha said, sounding faintly disapproving.
Smiling, Cordelia carefully lifted the clothes out of her bag; midnight blue jeans, dark grey t-shirt, bottle green jacket, they should help her hide in the shadows, and they weren't monochrome.
"Not in—" Willow said. "What!"
Cordelia quickly turned round, and blinked.
Agatha had taken her blouse off, revealing her injuries.
The biggest scar ran from her navel straight up to her throat, stopping just short of her neckline; other scars, most only a few inches long but some nearly as big, criss-crossed her moon-white skin; and everywhere, there were puncture marks, little circular dints left by fang and claw.
Agatha undid her skirt, letting it drop to the floor.
There were more scars on her legs, one of them completely circling her right thigh.
"How?" Cordelia gasped, too surprised to form a proper question.
"Dame Margo did tell you," Agatha said. "Once a week I patrol solo, as I have for forty years."
Brave but foolish, if this was the result. Agatha must have been near death dozens of times.
"That's two thousand nights," Willow said, looking closely at Agatha. "You don't have two thousand scars."
"No," Agatha said. "Most of these scars are decades old. Experience is the best teacher."
"And the newest?" Cordelia said challengingly.
Agatha pointed to a small scar half-hidden by her bra.
"I got this two years ago, and that was my first injury in three years. A vampire pulled a knife on me, I pulled a stake on him, up through the stomach. As long as it pierces the heart, it doesn't matter where it pierces the skin."
But going in at an angle would make it much more difficult to aim. Pulling off that trick would require years of practice, which Agatha had clearly had. Cordelia looked again at the scars. Agatha must be pretty good at the slaying, for a non-slayer, but at what price? How often had she come near death, before she'd learnt how to fight well?
Giles was right; Margo's methods put lives at risk, for no good reason. Patrolling solo was pointless machismo, groups of four or five watchers would be both safer and more effective. Nor should watchers have to learn how to fight out on the streets. If they really needed to, they should practice in controlled conditions, until they were good enough to go out patrolling without getting covered in scars.
And they shouldn't still be doing it when they were Agatha's age. She did look fit, fitter than Willow, but she was over sixty. She should be sitting in a rocking chair with a cat on her knee, handing out chocolates to her grandchildren, not risking her life in dark alleys. Margo expected too much.
"You don't have any scars on your face or hands," Willow said. "Why?"
"Dame Margo removed those," Agatha said, unfolding her grey outfit. "The rest I kept, as a badge of honour."
Why? Did the old watchers regularly strip naked to—
Frowning, Cordelia pushed away that repulsive image.
"She good at medicine?" Willow said.
"She is an alchemist," Agatha said. "There is little she cannot heal, given time, so tonight you need not fear injury. Even if you should lose an hand, Dame Margo will make it grow back."
"Is that likely?" Cordelia said, glaring sceptically at Agatha. Regrowing a lost hand would not make up for the pain of losing it, and it would probably grow back weird, with the hellmouth twisting the magic.
"Are you afraid of—"
"You will not let that happen," Cordelia said firmly, an aggressive stance, but it didn't matter if she annoyed Agatha now. The agreement with Margo ensured she'd have to co-operate anyway, and being firm now should encourage the Bodsworths to think of her as an equal, who needed to be treated with respect, not as a child they could push around.
"You would learn—"
"Teaching us self-defence is Giles's reponsibility," Cordelia said. "Shall I tell him you are infringing on his prerogatives?"
"No," Agatha said, "but—"
"We are not going to learn your way," Cordelia said. "We will learn Giles's way."
"Well, if you wish to avoid—"
"You can't talk your way round me. You can give us some useful tips, if you like, the way Giles would, but that's all. We will not let you toss us in the deep end, the way you were."
Cordelia did not want to end up festooned with scars.
"Your description of the traditional methods is not entirely accurate," Agatha said. "I did have some training before I took my oaths."
"Starting with how to run?" Willow said. "It looks like you needed more practice. Is that what you're teaching us?"
Cordelia mentally winced. She'd forgotten what Margo had told them yesterday, and overstated her case. Not by much, but she couldn't afford that kind of slip up.
"No amount of practice can substitute for the reality," Agatha said. "Mr Giles will be setting you a training schedule to increase your overall fitness, but since you three are already facing the reality Dame Margo has decided you cannot afford to wait for that before beginning your self-defence training. Do you disagree?"
"What, exactly, are you suggesting?" Cordelia asked.
"My husband and I will demonstrate how a non-slayer can fight, and critique your performance should you be forced to defend yourself," Agatha said. "But we will do all we can to prevent that necessity. However, there can be no guarantees. If you value your skin above the good of the world, you are in the wrong place."
"Do not question my integrity," Cordelia said. "I have already risked my life for the greater good. We both want the same things; we only disagree about how to get them."
"So long as we understand each other," Agatha said, looking sternly at Cordelia.
Cordelia smiled serenely, trying to unsettle Agatha. "I think we do."
"Are you two going to get changed?" Willow said, "Or are you going out dressed like that?"
------------
Wilfred jabbed the vampire in the groin with his cane.
It staggered backwards, into Agatha, who clubbed it over the head with her fan.
The vampire winced, then bared its teeth.
Raising his cane, Wilfred stepped forward, and pressed the trick button.
The vampire imploded.
Cordelia smiled. Buffy would have been quicker, but the Bodsworths were pretty good themselves; Giles too, of course, but he didn't get many chances to show off.
"Mr Alexander," Wilfred said. "How did we defeat that vampire?"
"You tripped him with your cane, then Mrs Agatha elbowed him in the back, then you—"
"I do not need a blow-by-blow recounting," Wilfred said. "What were our winning tactics?"
Xander frowned, thinking.
Agatha looked at Cordelia. "Where do young people congregate in this town?"
"Now we've burned the Bronze down? Aura said she was trying the Adelphi, three blocks that way."
It was only half the size of the Bronze, and the music there was awful, but it was the best place left, outside the university district.
"You stayed out of reach," Xander said as they all began walking. "Either behind it, or three foot in front. These canes are good for that."
They were, but Xander still looked odd carrying one, too conspicious for normal nights.
"Correct," Wilfred said. "You should always endeavour to keep these creatures at arms length. Did you observe anything else?"
Cordelia had, but she'd seen a lot more fights than Xander. He would need a gentle hint. "What was he aiming at?"
"The heart," Xander said. "Wh— Oh!"
He smiled. "You were trying to cripple him first. You kept going for the joints."
Wilfred nodded. "Breaking a vampire's kneecaps doesn't kill it, but it does make it easier to kill. The ankles, hamstrings and shoulders are also choice targets; the eyes too, but they are harder to hit."
"Buffy doesn't fight like that," Xander said.
"She doesn't need to," Agatha said. "We lack her strength and speed. We must substitute ruthlessness."
Xander frowned uncertainly, then shook his head. "So, what has the dame told you about us?"
Cordelia suppressed a sigh. Xander really did need some lessons in subtlety, and soon.
"She has told us of the arrangement of the treaty she made with you," Agatha said, "and of our obligations under it."
"She hasn't told us why," Wilfred said. "We don't need to know."
Xander smiled. "You mean she doesn't trust you with her long term plans?"
"We're the ones who will execute them," Wilfred said. "You will not cozen them out of me so easily."
"You meant you don't know why us," Cordelia said, giving him a gentle warning.
Wilfred's eyebrows twitched. "Well observed. At first glance neither of you would seem able to fulfil her expectations, but Dame Margo is never wrong. I can only presume you have hidden depths."
Xander scowled. "What expectations? If she's got plans for us she should tell us what they are."
Too blunt. Cordelia was sure she could persuade the Bodsworths to talk, eventually, but it would take months, maybe years.
"She wants you to do well," Agatha said. "Ideally, you would be feared by demons everywhere, and respected by all watchers. Do you have any problems with that?"
It wasn't a career Cordelia had ever imagined for herself, but world-wide respect was tempting, even if only in a small circle.
Xander smiled. "She thinks we could do that?"
"You will have our backing," Agatha said, "and whatever hidden advantages you may enjoy."
Tempting for Cordelia, but what did Margo gain? If Cordelia did well, it wouldn't help Margo revive her old-fashioned ideals; it would make Giles look good, sealing the doom of those ideals.
Xander glanced sideways at Cordelia. "You know you can't make us puppets?"
"We know," Wilfred said. "We will not—"
Ahead, someone screamed.
Pulling out their crossbows, the Bodsworths sprinted off toward the sound.
Xander followed them, Cordelia two steps behind him.
More screams echoed down the alley.
After sixty yards Xander slowed down, audibly struggling for breath.
Cordelia slowed, matching his speed.
"Buffy!"
That was Harmony, in trouble. Cordelia speeded back up.
"Buffy!" Harmony shouted again.
Corcelia could see her now, Harmony and two other girls, Aura and Gwen. They were up against the left-hand wall, with two men, probably vampires, pawing them, and Harmony was pulling something out of her handbag, a cross.
In the shadows, something giggled.
With ten yards to go Wilfred stopped, and fired his crossbow.
The bolt smashed into the nearer vampire's hip.
Letting go of Aura it stumbled backwards, half-turning to face Wilfred, busily reloading his crossbow.
Agatha fired.
The vampire dusted, pierced through the heart.
The second vampire looked up, surprised. "Who are—"
Wilfred's bolt smashed through its left cheek, burying itself deep in the vampire's skull.
The vampire fell back against the wall, then slumped to the ground next to Aura, pulling feebly at the arrow.
"Wait here," Agatha said as Cordelia reached her. "There's something in that doorway."
"Get away from us," Harmony said, kicking the vampire in the stomach, then whacked it in the face with her cross.
Groaning, the vampire crawled away from her, toward Cordelia.
"It's over," Harmony said, smiling reassuringly at Aura and Gwen. "The bad men …"
"Enough," a shrill voice said from the doorway. "Who dares harm my slaves?"
"Show yourself," Wilfred said.
The demon hopped out of the doorway.
Agatha laughed contemptuously.
"I am the great and powerful Rhunsp," the demon said. "Look upon me and know fear."
It didn't look great and powerful; it looked like a deformed toad; three foot tall, with only one leg, and two long tentacles sprouting from its back.
"Do you do tricks?" Cordelia did, a sneer in her voice. Refusing to be intimidated should throw this little demon off-balance.
"Look upon me and know fear," Rhunsp repeated. "I am the stuff of your nightmares."
Finally catching up with Cordelia, Xander laughed. "I've seen more frightening things than you in the school canteen."
"Why are you not cowering?" Rhunsp said. "You should be wailing, and gnashing your teeth, and beating your heads upon the ground, and—"
"Pathetic, much?" Cordelia said. Those two vampires must have been very feeble, to have been working for this creature.
"Revenant spawn of the deathgate, we—"
Mid-sentence, Agatha fired her crossbow, aiming at Rhunsp's head.
It batted the bolt away with its left tentacle. "Deathgate? What deathgate?"
"You didn't come through the deathgate?" Wilfred said, firing his crossbow.
The second vampire dusted.
"My slaves drove me here," Rhunsp said, idly tapping its tentacles together. "They were taking me to LA. I only stopped here because they were getting thirsty."
Cordelia frowned. Rhunsp could be lieing, of course, but it didn't have any reason to. More likely, it was a small-town demon, drawn to Sunnydale by the strengthening hellmouth.
If she'd still had death sight she could have been certain, but Margo had refused to do that spell tonight, saying she wanted to know how Cordelia and Xander performed without artificial enhancement.
Rhunsp stiffened, then pointed its right tentacle at Cordelia. "You're the slayer, aren't you. That's why you're not scared. Shouldn't you be bigger?"
"They're trainee watchers," Agatha said. "How would you like to die? Fast, or slowly?"
"I will not die tonight," Rhunsp said. "I shall rip off …"
While Rhunsp was ranting Wilfred discreetly whispered in Xander's ear.
"Follow his lead," Agatha whispered. "He's got a plan."
"… can't hurt you now," Harmony said, still looking at Aura and Gwen.
They both nodded, then straightened themselves up and walked away, toward the Adelphi.
Harmony scowled at Cordelia, then turned and followed the other girls.
Wilfred looked at Agatha, then shrugged his left shoulder.
Cordelia tapped Xander on the shoulder, catching his attention, then quietly mouthed, "What's the plan?"
Agatha and Wilfred both edged forwards, Agatha drifting to the right, Wilfred, to the left.
Xander pointed at Cordelia, drew a half circle with his forefinger, then closed his hand into a fist.
Rhunsp's right tentacle lashed out, grabbing Wilfred by the legs and pulling him down.
Cordelia winced, and started forward, but Xander shook his head.
Rhunsp rolled Wilfred along the ground, pulling him first this way, then that but never lifting him off the ground — fast, then, but not very strong.
Seemingly emotionless, Agatha continued sidling round Rhunsp.
Wilfred slid his hand half way along his cane.
Rhunsp's left tentacle lashed out, dragging Agatha down.
Wilfred jabbed his cane into the right tentacle.
As Rhunsp screamed Agatha slashed at its right tentacle.
"Now!" Xander said.
Cordelia nodded. Rhunsp had its tentacles full with the Bodsworths; it couldn't stop her getting past, and behind was the best direction to attack from. It wouldn't be able to bite her them; it would barely be able to see her.
Holding his cane in front of him, Xander walked slowly forwards.
Cordelia sprinted past him, raising her fan.
"No!" Xander shouted.
Rhunsp flicked out its tongue, wrapping it round her waist and yanking her forwards.
Cordelia groaned, realising she should have expected this from a demon toad. Everyone knew toads had long tongues —
— but they only had one tongue each. The plan could still work.
Cordelia tucked her left hand inside her jacket, then grabbed the tongue with it.
"Cordy," Xander said, looking uncertainly at the tongue as he stepped towards her. "I—"
"Go for it," Cordelia said, pointing down the alley with her fan. "I'm OK."
Rhunsp tugged at her waist, and she fell forwards, landing heavily on her knees.
Xander took another step towards her, but Cordelia glared at him and pointed again. "Go!"
His obvious concern was heartwarming, but not helpful. If he wanted to help her, he should go and kill the demon.
Xander looked at Cordelia a moment longer, then turned back to face Rhunsp.
Cordelia gritted her teeth, mentally preparing herself. This wasn't going to be pleasant, but she'd have to look at what she was doing, or risk slicing up her own hand.
Xander ran down the alley, heading for the gap between Rhunsp and Agatha.
Cordelia raised the fan in her right hand, pressing the trick button, then brought it down on the tongue, hard.
Blood oozed out, thick and warm.
Rhunsp convulsed, dragging Cordelia forwards.
Xander jumped over the tentacle.
Rhunsp flicked up a loop of tentacle, hooking Xander's foot.
Xander fell heavily, landing on his stomach, one arm under him, the other outstretched.
Cordelia slashed at the tongue again.
Moaning, Xander lifted his head.
Rhunsp dragged her further forward.
She could feel her knees scraping along the ground now, even through the denim.
Ignoring the pain, Cordelia began sawing at the tongue.
Xander crawled a few feet down the alley, behind Rhunsp and away from its tentacles, then struggled upright, with the help of the cane.
More blood oozed out, slowly flowing down Cordelia's sleeve and dripping off her elbow.
Cordelia gagged, but did not falter. If she stopped now Rhunsp might stick its tongue down her front, or round her neck. Worse, it might strangle Xander in front of her. She would have to watch him die, knowing it was her fault for being too squeamish.
After a few seconds Xander straightened up and looked at Rhunsp.
Laughing, Agatha sliced a chunk off the tentacle wrapped round her waist, then knocked it sideways, right under Rhunsp's eyes.
Rhunsp shuddered, its tongue tightening round Cordelia's waist.
Xander lunged forwards, stabbing down with his cane.
The spike slid out, scratching a line down Rhunsp's right flank, then slid off.
Xander stumbled, then steadied himself.
Rhunsp lurched sideways, to its left, dragging Wilfred after it.
"Aim for the base of the skull," Wilfred shouted, his voice unruffled.
"And I was going to give it flowers," Xander said, not taking his eyes off Rhunsp.
"In your own time, Mr Alexander," Agatha said. "I'm sure Mistress Cordelia can endure a little while longer."
Xander lightly touched the cane to the back of Rhunsp's neck, then leaned on it, his weight driving the spike in.
Howling in agony, Rhunsp unwound its tongue from Cordelia's waist, but she didn't let go. She couldn't, or it might be able to use it against Xander.
Struggling with the Bodsworths, Rhunsp pulled its left tentacle free, and reached up.
Xander pushed the cane further in.
Rhunsp collapsed, blood pouring from its eyes.
Cordelia released its tongue, and checked herself for injuries.
"You OK, Cordy?" Xander said.
"Grazed knees," Cordelia said. Rhunsp had ripped a hole in her jeans, dragging her round like that, but it hadn't been squeezing hard enough to bruise, and the jacket sleeve had protected her hand. "You?"
Xander rubbed his shoulder. "Just bruises."
"You need more practice falling," Wilfred said as Agatha helped him up. "You want to carve, dear?"
"It's your turn," Agatha said, handing him her fan, then looked at Xander's uncomprehending face. "We don't know Rhunsp's species, so we have to remove all major organs, and burn them, to be safe."
"Here?" Xander said. "Now? Buffy never does that."
"Naturally," Agatha said. "She has Mr Giles to do that for her; hopefully, out of her sight. The slayer should not have to concern herself with such distasteful necessities."
Agatha paused, and pulled two packets out of her sleeve.
"Here," she said, tossing one to Cordelia, the other to Xander. "You can be cleaning yourself up, unless you'd rather watch the dissection?"
Cordelia caught the packet, plain white tissues, and shook her head.
"We did frogs in biology the other week," Xander said, a faint tremor in his voice.
Agatha shrugged, then knelt over the corpse. "Try a ventral …"
Ignoring her, Cordelia walked over to Xander and smiled. "Your first kill. How's it feel?"
It wasn't really, but Xander hadn't meant to kill Jesse. Killing on purpose was different.
Xander glanced down at Wilfred, cutting open the corpse, then quickly looked away. "It's … messier than I expected. Is there always this much blood?"
Cordelia shrugged. "Every demon is different."
Or so Giles had said once. She didn't actually have much more experience with demons than Xander, but sounding as though she had could prove useful.
"You're good at this, aren't you," Xander said, staring at her face. "You looked … magnificent, like Buffy."
Carefully overlooking the accidental insult, Cordelia smiled. "You looked pretty good yourself."
After a moment's silence, Xander blinked, then smiled back.
------------
The vampire punched Cordelia in the stomach.
Winded, she staggered backwards, until the wall stopped her.
Xander jabbed it in the ribs with his cane.
The vampire spun round, growling.
Cordelia looked frantically round the alley.
The Bodsworths couldn't help, too busy fighting the other vampire.
No crates, so she couldn't improvise a stake.
Buffy must be at least five blocks away and in combat, judging from the rainbow flares Margo was sending up. She wouldn't be able to help in time, even if she did hear Cordelia shouting.
The vampire grabbed Xander by the arm and threw him against the wall.
Xander slumped down, his head lolling to one side.
Cordelia would have to kill this vampire herself, or watch it kill Xander.
The vampire laughed. "Pathetic mortals, you can't hope to defeat me, who was the terror of Rome uncounted centuries before your birth."
"One century, and you were only there two weeks before the priests drive you out."
"An—" the vampire said, and imploded.
Smiling, Angel pulled his stake out of the cloud of dust. "Josiah never could count."
"Some help would be appreciated," Agatha said, rolling out of the way of the vampire's kick.
"They're watchers," Cordelia warned Angel. "Help them."
Angel looked at her, then ran to join the fight.
Cordelia turned and looked at Xander, still slumped against the wall. There were no obvious new injuries, just the nascent bruises from earlier fights, and the rips in his t-shirt where the last demon had clawed at his chest, but shouldn't he have been moving by now?
Opening his eyes, Xander jumped to his feet.
"How—" Cordelia began, then glared accusingly at him, realising the truth. "You were faking."
Xander smiled. "Lure the vamp in, then catch him off guard."
That sounded clever, but all he'd done was worry her. Cordelia scowled, and looked away.
The other vampire backed away from Angel, onto the spike of Wilfred's cane.
"A workable strategy," Wilfred said, looking curiously at Angel, "but it was not appropriate in this case. You are not sufficiently competent to fight a vampire close-up, and you had not warned us in advance. We might have needlessly placed ourselves in danger to rescue you."
"You're only supposed to deceive the enemy," Cordelia added, "not your friends."
Admittedly, there were times when it was necessary to, but not in the middle of a fight.
Xander nodded, accepting the reprimand.
Cordelia smiled briefly, then hurried over to the Bodsworths. She couldn't afford to leave them alone with Angel, they might work out who he was, and she needed to warn him to stay away from Margo.
"I do not believe we have been introduced to this gentleman," Wilfred said, looking at Angel.
"He's Angel, and he's on our side," Cordelia said. "Angel, they are Wilfred and Agatha Bodsworth, the aides of Dame Margo fforbes-Hamilton."
"An interesting name," Agatha said. "Family or Christian?"
"More of a nickname," Angel said, shifting uneasily. "Where's Buffy?"
"With the dame," Xander said, coming up behind Cordelia. "Got another message for her?"
"The annointed one has survived," Angel said. "Shouldn't you be with Buffy, or at home. It's—"
"Dame Margo considered this the optimum arrangement," Agatha said. "Do you wish to question her judgement?"
"No," Cordelia mouthed.
Angel frowned. "Who's Margo?"
"Show proper respect for your elders, lad," Wilfred said, lightly tapping Angel's chest with his cane.
Angel pushed the cane away.
"She is a senior watcher," Cordelia said. "Her slayer was Helga, died eighty years ago. Remember her now?"
"Helga? She was a good slayer, died in Flanders. Shouldn't her watcher be dead by now?"
"The dame's an alchemist," Xander said, coming up behind Cordelia. "And she's given herself magic powers."
"Last night she gave us death sight," Cordelia added, seizing the opening. "We could see undead stuff, even through walls, and recognise vampires miles off. Dame Margo can see like that all the time."
Xander smiled. "Did you see that big magic explosion last night?"
"That was Margo?" Angel said, his eyes widening.
"Angel, you will speak of her with proper respect," Wilfred said, tapping his cane on Angel's chest again.
Angel looked down at the cane, then meaningfully at Wilfred.
Cordelia nodded at Angel. "Ngralth made her angry."
"Never annoy a lady," Angel said, smiling. "Why aren't you with her?"
Six blocks east, a pillar of rainbow fire rose into the sky, piercing the clouds, then winked out.
Cordelia closed her eyes, waiting for the afterimages to fade.
"If we were with her," Agatha said, "Dame Margo would have to be more restrained in her use of magic. It is safer for us to fight separately."
"It would be safer—" Angel began, staring eastward.
"But—" Cordelia interrupted
"—for you all to stay home," Angel went on, overriding her. Cordelia and Xander are too young for this; you are too old. Don't the watcher's have a retirement plan?"
Cordelia glared at Angel. If he'd let her finish speaking he'd have been safe, but now she couldn't stop the Bodsworths asking the wrong question.
"Retirement is for cowards," Wilfred said, glaring at Angel. "I will not give up the fight while there is breath in my body. Nor would I demean these two by expecting any less of them."
"They have chosen to join our fight," Agatha said, nodding. "We must respect that choice, and give them the training they need to fight well, as we have given them the weapons."
"The canes?" Angel said. "I remember th—, hearing about them, almost useless. Any competent vampire could snatch it from your hand, and break it. Only the slayer—"
"Try it," Wilfred said. "If it's so easy, snatch this cane from me."
Angel reached out, then hesitated.
"You can't do it, can you?" Agatha said, smiling. "There are protective runes engraved on the handle."
"You mean these are magic?" Xander said, staring at his cane.
"Not in the sense you mean," Wilfred said. "They are protected against theft and breakage. That is all. If any were ever broken by vampires, it's because the watcher was unwilling to pay extra."
"So, you see, your concerns for their safety are misplaced," Agatha said, then smiled. "What of yours? Who are you, that you can walk alone this night and not be afraid?"
"A friend," Angel said.
"How nice for you," Agatha said. "Would you care to answer my question?"
He couldn't, or they'd try and stake him, but Angel hadn't had time to prepare a credible lie, and the Bodsworths would notice any evasion. He was cornered, entirely because he'd failed to follow her lead. Now she'd have to play one of her cards to keep him safe.
"He can't," Cordelia said.
"You know who he is?" Agatha said, looking curiously at Cordelia.
"He's a friend," Cordelia said. "Dame Margo would not be pleased if I told you any more."
"She knows?" Angel gasped.
"No," Cordelia said. "She doesn't want to know. I'm the only one of us who knows."
For now, anyway. She'd have to tell Xander soon, and find a natural-looking way to let the others know, or Buffy might fall in love with him again.
Wilfred glanced at Agatha, who nodded. "If that's good enough for Dame Margo, it's good enough for us."
"Well connected, aren't you?" Angel said, after a moment's thoughtful silence.
Cordelia smiled. "I know a few people."
"Should I help Buffy?" Angel said, and Xander stared.
"Not tonight. It is too dangerous for you," Cordelia said. Too much could go wrong if Margo got her hands on him.
"We'd appreciate your help," Agatha said, "but the longer we spend together, the more likely we are to learn more than we should."
Angel nodded, then turned and walked away, vanishing into the night.
"Is there anyone around here without dark secrets?" Xander said, staring after him.
"Let me think," Cordelia said, her brow furrowed in exaggerated concentration. "You, me, Buffy, … No, I can't think of anyone."
------------
"We should—" Cordelia said two hours later, walking slowly round a corner, then stopped.
Buffy and Giles were a few yards down the street, just as she'd hoped. They both looked a mess; clothes scuffed and torn, dust in their hair, blood drying on their skin, but they were still in better shape than her party.
"Where's Willow?" Xander asked, peering into the darkness.
"Last fight demolished a factory," Buffy said. "We got separated."
Leaving Willow alone with Margo, a suspiciously convenient accident.
Wilfred limped round the corner, leaning on his cane, Agatha on his other arm.
"What happened?" Giles said, rushing forwards.
"He's broken his ankle," Cordelia said, "and Mrs Agatha's broken her arm."
"Then why were you heading this way?" Giles asked. "The hospital—"
"They are only minor fractures," Wilfred said. "Nothing serious."
"I heard your bones crack," Cordelia said tersely. "I've told them they need the hospital, but they refuse to go."
Giles glanced at Cordelia, wincing when he saw her bandage, then looked over at Xander.
"Duty comes before all else," Agatha said. "These trifling injuries are no real impediment."
"With respect," Giles said, "you can not fight with a broken ankle."
He already had, despite Cordelia's objections. Agatha had broken her arm, protecting him.
Really, they should have stopped an hour ago, before they got tired, but the Bodsworths had insisted on fighting on, despite her protests, and in his exhaustion Wilfred had stumbled, mid-fight, breaking his ankle.
Agatha glared at Giles. "Mr Edward Hopkinson—"
"—died the second time he went out patrolling, in his wheelchair. He would have died the first time, had the vampires not been too busy laughing."
"I have never patrolled for less than six hours," Wilfred said. "I am not going to lower my standards now."
"You've never patrolled on a hellmouth before," Giles said, shoving his glasses back. "How vampires do you normally meet each night? One? Two?"
Wilfred nodded.
"How many vampires have we seen tonight?" Cordelia said, looking at Xander. "Thirty?"
Xander nodded confirmation. "At least, and six demons."
"All the more reason to continue until the end," Wilfred said.
"Your dedication is admirable," Giles said, "but flesh and blood do have their limits, and you are not the slayer. You have already done far more than any could ask of you. You need do no more."
"I wouldn't expect you to understand," Agatha said.
"If anyone dares question your commitment," Giles said, "I will call them out. Call it a night, if not for your sake, for theirs."
"I will not go to the hospital unless you drag me there," Wilfred said. "I know my duty. Nor do these two have any serious injuries. They could fight until dawn, if need be."
In theory, perhaps, if they really needed to, but Cordelia would rather not. Her clothes were ruined, she had bruises everywhere, and — she put her hand to the bandage, checking for bleeding — she had clawmarks under her ribs, from the last demon.
Xander had done better. His t-shirt was shredded, revealing a chest covered in bruises, and he had a few scratches, but nothing major.
"Buffy," Giles said. "Could you pick Mr Bodsworth up?"
Buffy smiled. "Tie them up, and I could carry them both."
"About time," Xander muttered, and Cordelia nodded. She'd been half-thinking about doing that herself, but she wasn't strong enough to restrain Wilfred and Agatha, even with Xander's help.
"You can't ask her to do that," Wilfred protested. "It's beneath her dignity."
"If you will not walk, you will be carried," Giles said, bending down to look at Cordelia's bandage. "For your own good. Do you know what did this?"
"Lurgnard did," Agatha said. "He doesn't use poison."
Giles nodded. "Did you use any antiseptic?"
"Iodine," Cordelia said accusingly. It might have been the best available when Agatha learnt first aid, forty years ago, but times had changed. There had to be a less uncomfortable alternative, for people not stuck in the fifties.
"Should be OK," Giles said, "but I'd like to get it looked at."
"Dame Margo will take care of all these trifling injuries," Agatha said. "We need not trouble the hospital."
Giles looked left, then right. "She doesn't seem to be here. If she can cure us, good. Until then, we need medical attention. Do you want to walk, or to be carried?"
"What about Willow?" Xander said. "We can't—"
"Willow can wait," Giles said. "Dame Margo won't let anything harm her. These three need medical attention, now."
Wilfred met Giles's gaze a moment, then sighed, a tired old man, leaning on his cane. "I'll walk."