here you goo my friends...
Chapter 6
No.
No.
No.
No.
Did I have to say it again?
Edward's idea of helping Tanya is completely out of my comfort zone. It doesn't even make sense to me! How can me being sexy lure someone to their ex. James broke up with Tanya! He didn't want her! So how the hell am I going to change that?
"I refuse." I said to Edward as he sat down on my bed with that delicious smirk on his edged face.
"Come on Bella, help out a friend. Don't you want what's best for her?"
"Of course I do but I will not go against my will and put what's left of my dignity on the line to do so." I jerked.
Edward chuckled and wrapped his lean arm around my petite waist and pulled me against his body on my bed. "Please."
"Edward..."
"Bella..." He mimicked.
"I can't." I complained, ducking my head into his shoulder blade.
"Why?"
"How do you think this sounds? 'Girls, let's all pretend to be strippers and lure a bunch of boys there and put on a couple shows and then eventually they'll want to come daily and then we put Tanya in there and all the guys ditch James and they get their 'freak on' while we celebrate our hard work for pole dancing!' Oh yeah, that speech is a real keeper."
"I think it's a good idea."
"That's because it's yours." I said.
"Just do it. Take a chance Bella. You're always too uptight. I'd like to see you get your 'freak on'."
I rolled my eyes and thought about it. Edward hasn't really seen that kid of side of me. The side that can do something completely out of my daily routine.
"What would you have me do?" I gave in.
"Get everyone to agree." Edward grinned deviously.
Oh to joy.
Now let's shred it to pieces.
/~/~/~/~/~/~/~/~/~/~/
All the girls easily agreed, some of them giving me a little too much information like when Jessica Stanley and Rosalie Hale straight out said, and I quote "We have a lot of experience doing this kind of stuff. We do it every Saturday."
Just lovely.
"So name me all the girls you've got." Edward demanded.
"Umm...Jessica, Rosalie, Alice, Angela, Irina, Kate, Lauren, Heidi and Jane. You?"
"Well, obviously James and Laurent, Jasper, Emmett, Garrett, Tyler, Mike, Ben and Eric." He told me. "Now we just need a place. Do you think my house would work?"
"No offense Edward, but how do you think your parents would feel when you tell them you wanna host a strip party?"
"Bella, you think way to much. My parents go out every Friday, Saturday and Sunday and leave me and Alice home alone. You come over all the time when their not here." Edward sighed.
"So your house it is. Now what?"
"Well seeing as today is Sunday, invite all the girls over and they can all use Alice's things and she'll design your outfits and then I'll get the guys over here around eight and while you guys set up, I'll get Emmett and Jazz to help me set up the house to make it...slut like."
"Okay. I'll go get Alice and we'll get the girls over. See you at seven thirty?"
"Seven thirty it is."
I left Edward to do his part while me and all the girls got ready. Alice completely destroyed my hair, teased it and personally I thought it looked like a lion's mane. She then stuck me in these black leather, laced boots that reminded me of the ones Madonna wore in her "Like a Virgin" music video and pinned me into really short black booties and a leather button vest where my cleavage (or what I have of it) felt way to exposed.
"Is hundreds of coasts of make-up really necessary Rose?" I asked.
"Yes."
"What's the difference? It's all black and disturbing."
"Actually, this one is Charcoal, while this one is Jet Black."
"Well to me, they all the the same."
She rolled her eyes but continued to plaster me in make-up while all the other girls put on their outfits.
I felt like slut patrol could show up at the front door anytime and arrest me for many reasons, number one would be trying to be sexy, while number two along with the rest of them would be committing the crime of too much leather, make up, and so much g-d damn hoochiness.
I feel like the world biggest whore.
After Rose was done, Alice looked over all of us and nodded her head in satisfaction just as Edward walked in the door, his eyes wide as the roamed all the girl's bodies and then they stopped at mine and it looked like he couldn't breathe and his eyes were even wider then they were before.
If I have to dress like a slut for him to get my attention, that is going to piss me off royally. Why can't I get this reaction when I'm just me? All dolled up in jeans and a plaid shirt where leather is non-existent? Is that too dull? It's no wonder he agreed to be with Tanya. Isn't this similar to what she wore on a daily basis? I just don't think that this is the way to get a guy's attention and I certainly don't like that it makes Edward look at me differently. I'm just never going to be good enough for him. I refuse to dress like a hoe for him to really notice me...well it's more like he notices my microscopic boobs and flat ass.
"Umm...wow Alice. Good job."
"Thanks Edward, now leave." She giggled, pushing her brother out the door.
"I just came to say that it's 7:30 and I want to show you guys the room we made. Come take a look." He smirked.
We all followed Edward into his basement where the room looked like an everyday club. There were four black poles on a stage at the front of the room and bright lights shone in every direction. There were couches in front on the stage where the guys would sit and there was a little I-pod in the corner hooked up to some speakers. Black curtains hung from the ceiling and at the back left corner, there was a room where guys good take advantage of girls.
I won't be attending that room. Ever.
We waited in the basement and got familiar to the room...well the girls did and didn't try to hide it while I sat on the couch, sulking and completely regretting ever agreeing to this.
"What's wrong?" Edward asked, as he came to sit next to me, fairly close.
"I just don't get it. You couldn't think of a more practical way to get them back together?"
"I could have but this is more fun." He winked.
"This makes me feel dirty." I snorted.
"I'm exited, personally."
"What do you mean?"
"I want to see you take a chance and I want to see my best friend work the pole." He grinned crookedly.
The words I noticed were "best friend". That is all I'll ever be and it made me think about something. If I show Edward that there is some sensual about me and seductive...even if it does go against everything I thought of earlier...does that mean that he will stop seeing me as this "best friend" and more of someone who can work a pole and give a lap dance? As much as I hate to admit it I want him to see me differently now. I want Edward to want to kiss me. I just wish I didn't have to go this far. You'd think love has it's boundaries. Who ever said that is full of shit.
"We'll see." I smirked, and got up then walked away. There was nothing stopping me now.
Moments later, guys began to shuffle into the basement one by one and sit down on the couch while Lady Gaga blasted in the intense speakers. Soon, everyone had arrived and all of the girls were ready. Me...not so much.
As Three by Britney Spears began to play, I immediately wanted to call my dad and have him arrest Edward for making me do this, rip the beer out of the guys hands and make me a nice hot bath to scrub of all the dirt.
Drinking was so not my forte.
As each girl walk down the catwalk I began to feel adrenaline pump through me. Not in the way that makes me feel like "I can do anything if I just believe." Please. This was not a beauty paegent. More in the way that "This better make Edward think more highly of me." But then again...the words left my mind before I could catch them and change them back.
Although I'm scared shitless about walking out there and likely making a fool of myself, I attempted to asked calmly in what you would call "back stage." More like a really tight and cramped area where all of our leather scratched against one another and we could feel everyone's sticky breathe blowing across our faces. It took everything in me not to pull the tic-tac joke or barf.
But the space began to thin out as each girl walked out fiercely. I could actually point out Jessica and Rosalie behind the leather doing their walks because their struts were a lot better (professional in this situation, although professional isn't a word I should have used) than a lot of the other girls.
Eventually, I was the last one there, trying to feel the beat of the music all the way from in-between my toes to the roots of my hair.
I was never the most graceful person so there is a ninety-nine percent possibly that this could end very badly. Where is the caution sign when you need it?
I opened the two thick black curtains then pushed them out of my way and posed they way Alice showed me with my hands on my hips and my stance way to far apart that I'd consider it the splits.
Then, I began to walk down the stage and do two poses again at the end, pivoted around and went to go join the girls on the poles. I felt like a whore just walking over there, feeling my feet shake in my boots.
This is for Edward.
This is for Edward.
This is for Edward.
I continued to chant that as I strutted my way over to Alice and Angela's pole.
We each put our right hand on it and spun around one after another and then Alice began to take charge, winking at Jasper then began to grind the pole.
It took me two minutes and four seconds to realize pole dancing wasn't for me.
I backed away from Alice and her sexapeal and grabbed Angela and we danced together on stage when I saw Edward from my perphial vision.
I knew exactly what he was saying to me.
"Hey Angie?" I smiled at her, while dancing as well.
"Yeah?" She asked, breathless.
"I think you should go give Ben a lap dance." I told her, knowing this is what Edward wants to get the guys more involved.
"Only if you give Edward one." She bargained.
"No."
"Come on. I am not doing it if you don't."
"Angela Weber. I am already decked out in leather and Madonna boots, I refuse to tear what is left of my dignity."
"Then so do I." She smirked.
"Please." I begged.
"No Bella. If you don't, I don't. It's as simple as that."
Angela was never like this, she was always completely meek and willing to do whatever. It made me show her that I'm not a wimp and I can do this.
"Fine." I urged at her as I walked away from her dancing figure, off the stage and to where Edward was sitting next to Jasper and Emmett.
I took his hand and pulled him up onto the stage, then grabbed the other hand and wrapped it around my torso then braced myself for what I was about to do next.
I swayed my body with the rhythm of the music and began to grind against him, moving all the way to the floor then up again while his hands rubbed parts of my body I didn't have...and parts I'd never thought he would never ever touch. As I came back up the third time, I spun around him, hitched my leg over his waist and throwing my head back with a laugh. I'd scene so many movies where girls do this and I wonder how they did it with a straight face. I felt like a home wrecker.
I removed my legs from his body and then walked around so my stomach was pressed to his back and slowly placed my two hands on his chest and swiped them all down the front of his body. After that, I pressed my back against his and turned to see Ben and Angela heading for the secluded room in the corner, wishing it was me with Edward instead of her and Ben.
I saw the way Ben held her hand lovingly, and the way she made him smile as well as their affection for each other. He gripped her hand so tightly, afraid anyone would snatch her away and never wanting to let her go.
I wanted Edward to look at me that way, feel me that way and love me that way, despite what is all over my body. I wanted him to love me for me, not this.
I stepped away from Edward's body and he turned around, his eyes still wide like they were earlier, then I nodded once at him indicating I was done and left that room, the house, skidded into my car and drove home all in one swift movement.
As I lied on top of my covers, still decked out in that g-d awful leather, I prayed that Edward wouldn't come tonight. There was no reason for him to. You come because you care. Sure he cares, just not the way I want him to. I want him to look at me the way I look at him. The way Angela looks at Ben. The way Jazz looks at Alice. The way he looked at Tanya.
And that night, as my eyes fluttered closed and I drifted off to sleep, the thought that pondered in my head was the same one I had every night since I met Edward Cullen.
Why am I not good enough?