Come Round Soon

She'd walked him out, watched him leave, unlit cigarette still in her pocket. Briefly, she wondered if he would care if she left. It hadn't been a holiday, it had been a job interview. One she was seriously considering.

Certain he could no longer see her, she pulled the cigarette from her pocket and lit it. The first drag burning through her lungs, relaxing her body. Despite his flippant words about her secretly being in love with him, she knew he didn't think of her as anything more than a friend.

She supposed she could stay, see if he ever came around, saw her as something more. But she was more of a bird in the hand kind of girl. A fantastic job offer, a new city, hell a new country, it would be an all new adventure. One without a handsome, broken detective inspector to keep her from really having a life.

"Doctor, I wasn't aware you are a smoker."

Stubbing out the cigarette, she exhaled as turned. "I'm not Sergeant."

Looking at the smoke slowly wafting through the air, "There is evidence to the contrary."

Fixing him with a glare, "What evidence, Sergeant Hathaway?"

Fighting a smile against her withering glare, he nodded. "Purely circumstantial, nothing that would hold up."

A small smile played across her lips, "You're smarter than you look."

He pulled the packet from his pocket and removed a cigarette of his own. Offering the packet to her, "They don't count if they belong to someone else."

She took one, smiling up at him as he lit it. "That's good to know."

They smoked in silence for a moment, "How was your holiday?"

She looked away, nodding lightly, "It was nice."

"You don't look very relaxed for someone just off holiday."

"Are you ever relaxed on your first day back?"

He shrugged, "Don't really know, haven't been on holiday in longer than I can remember."

Taking one last drag from her cigarette, she stubbed it out. "Perhaps it's time for you to do just that."

He smiled down at her, "Who has the time?" He watched her walk back to the entrance of the building, "Join us for a drink tonight?"

She paused for a moment, her hand on the handle. Nodding, figuring tonight might be a good time to tell them, "Yeah, alright."

James had texted, said they were running a bit late. She ordered a drink, wishing she'd brought a book to pass the time. Instead, she ran through a mental pro/con list about the new job. Thus far there were far more items on the pro side than on the con side.

"Penny for them."

She looked up, surprised to find James standing there. "Not sure they're worth that much."

Sitting across from her he looked at her pensively, "The look of concentration on your face would suggest otherwise."

"Where's the Inspector?"

"Would you like another drink?"

Inhaling deeply, she made her decision. "He's not coming is he?"

James shook his head, sadly, almost thankful she'd guessed. "No, something came up…with the case."

"I think I will take another drink. There's something I need to tell you."

They stood in the cold, smoking. "America, really?"

"It's an amazing opportunity. A teaching hospital, limited callout schedule, research grants, everything I've ever wanted, really."

"But America?"

"A new start, if I'm going to do it, might as well do it right."

James waved out at the river, passing languidly along its way. "You'll miss all of this."

"They have rivers there James, in fact a very large river."

Taking a drag from his cigarette, he nodded, "But it won't be here, it won't be Oxford."

"No, but I never planned on staying here this long." She looked up at him, knowing he would discern her meaning."

"Care to take a walk, Dr. Hobson?"

"Only if you call me Laura."

She linked her arm in his and they started walking, no particular destination in mind. There was a comfortable silence between them as they made their way into town.

"Does he know yet?"

She shook her head, "No, I'd planned on telling you both together, tonight."

"He won't like it."

She laughed, a sharp bitter sound, "He won't even notice I'm gone."

"Yes, he will."

"Another pathologist will come along who answers his questions and life will go on, it always does."

James stopped walking, turned to her, surprised at her tone, "Why do you say that? He cares for you."

"As a friend, nothing more. And I need more."

"He just needs a bit more time. He'll come around."

Pulling on his arm, she started walking again. "If I thought that was true, I would stay forever. But I know better. He's always going to be stuck in the past. And I am ready to live now."

They rounded the corner and Laura stopped walking. James looked down at her, seeing she'd gone frightfully pale. Following her stare, he saw the Inspector kissing a very attractive woman next to a car. He stepped in front of Laura, pushing her backward, taking her around the corner.

Tears formed in her eyes but the look on her face was glacial, "So much for being stuck in the past, eh."

"Laura, I swear I didn't know."

She shrugged, "It's not the first; it won't be the last. It will just be the last time I have to know about it."

"Why don't we grab something from the off license? I'll take you home. We'll smoke too much and get well and truly pissed."

She shook her head placing her hand gently on his chest. "Thank you, but no. It's OK, James. I had made my decision before I saw him. This just gave me some closure."

"I'm going to have to get this eye seen to." Robbie said as he rubbed at the tape covering the gash near his eyebrow. "You know anyone"

"Have you talked with Dr. Hobson lately?"

Robbie nodded, "About the case, sure."

"Why don't you give her a call? See if she can take a look at that eye."

"She only works on dead people, James."

James stood, downing the last of his drink. "No, she's tended to a few of the PCs, saved them a trip to A&E. Bet she'd do the same for you."

It had been a productive evening. Her office was fully packed. While she wasn't officially leaving for another four weeks, any belongings she wanted with her had to be shipped which meant they had to be ready by early the following week. And they still wouldn't arrive until several weeks after she started.

It felt weird to stand in her, now empty, office. The room seemed bigger, there was almost an echo in it. The extra bedroom would go faster, fewer personal belongings in there. She might tackle it tonight. But right now she wanted a glass of wine and a cigarette.

She'd made herself a vow, when she moved, there would be no more cigarettes. A new job, a fresh start, no vices brought with her. Pouring a healthy amount of wine, she lifted it and the pack of cigarettes then made her way to the garden. It was warmer than earlier in the week so she had no need of a sweater.

Lighting the cigarette she inhaled deeply, enjoying the first drag but not as much as earlier in the week. Yes, this was definitely a vice that didn't need to join her in her new life.

"What has you so stressed, Dr. Hobson?"

She froze, knowing the voice without needing to turn around. Turning, she held it up, "This one is a reward for a job well done."

He stood at the gate waiting for her to invite him in, "You were a great help with our case."

Her heart stopped for a moment, had he really stopped by to thank her, "What happened to your eye?"

"Assault with a deadly weapon."

Taking another drag, "You should have someone look at it."

"Sort of why I'm here. James said you've helped out a few PCs. I was hoping you could do the same for me."

Of course, he wasn't here for her. It was all about him. "I don't keep medical supplies at home, beyond a band-aid or two. That needs professional help."

"Last I checked, you're a professional. Can you at least give me an opinion?"

Sending him away, would cause more questions than she was interested in answering. Crushing out the cigarette, she nodded, "Come in, I'll go wash my hands. But if it needs more than a band-aid you're on your own."

Seeing her glass, "I wouldn't say know to a glass of wine….for medicinal purposes."

"That's the last of the bottle."

"You could open another."

She shook her head, "I don't have anymore."

"Perhaps we could share this."

"You can have it, I find I don't want it anymore."

Without another word, she walked into the house, leaving him alone on the patio. In the kitchen, she washed her hands and retrieved her first aid kit. Standing at the sink, she tried to calm her nerves. Didn't want to feel what she was feeling, needed him to be anywhere but in her garden.

"Laura, are you moving house?"

She turned, startled, the first aid kit fell to the floor. "Damn." She bent to pick up the kit and the scattered contents.

Robbie knelt next to her, helping to pick up all of the pieces, "Are you?"

She nodded, "Yes, I am."

"Why? You love this house. I've heard you wax poetic about your garden on more occasions than I can count."

Seems like now would be the time she would tell him. Perhaps it was for the best. She was in her home, could draw strength from her surroundings, "Yes, I do but the commute would be a bitch."

"The commute?"

"I've given notice, accepted another job, elsewhere."

"Where, London?"

"New Orleans."

"That's not in England."

Standing with first aid kit, she moved to the counter, trying to return it to its normal organized state. "No, it's not."

His voice rose, "You're moving to the states?"

"Yes."

Getting louder, he was a on the verge of exploding, "When? When were you going to tell me?"

She shrugged, trying desperately to seem nonchalant. "Four weeks from today. I had planned to tell you over drinks a few nights ago. James invited me to join the two of you and I was going to tell you both. But you didn't come so I told James alone. I'm surprised he hasn't said something."

"Why?"

She turned to him, anger beginning to build. "Why, what?"

"Why are you leaving?"

"A better job, a better life, something new, exciting. The usual reason people change jobs, move house."

"You have a life here."

"No, I have a job here but I don't have much of a life. And if I am going to live for the job then it should at least be a challenging job. And who knows, perhaps, in a new place, with new people, I might actually get a life too." They stared at one another, Robbie finally seemed to understand. "Now, have a seat and I'll look at your eye."

He shook his head, "No, I'll go to A&E. I shouldn't have bothered you."

Moving toward him, she touched his arm, "You're here; you might as well let me look at it."

Pulling away from her, he backed toward the door. "No, I wouldn't want to keep you from your new life."

She followed him into the garden, watched him all but run from her garden. Anger flared at his response. How dare he get mad at her? Did he really expect her to wait for him? Expect her to be happy with the scraps he threw at her when he didn't have something better on offer?

Turning to the glass, she saw his lip prints on the side of it. Picking it up, she hurled it across the patio. A shiver of pleasure ran through her at the breaking sound. She knew she would have to clean it later and would regret the fit of pique but for now, it felt good.

Making her way back inside, she pulled down another bottle of wine, opened it and poured a new glass. She'd lied when she told him she was out. There had been a small twinge of guilt when the words left her mouth, now there was nothing. Returning to the patio, she took a large sip from her glass before lighting a cigarette. It was the last one in the pack which seemed fitting. Saying goodbye to two vices in the same night was the perfect way to get on with her new life.

I could use another cigarette
But don't worry, daddy, I'm not addicted yet
One too many drinks tonight
And I miss you like you were mine

All your stormy words have barely broken
And you sound like thunder, though you've barely spoken
Oh, it looks like rain tonight and thank God
'Cause a clear sky just wouldn't feel right

He's taken and leaving but I keep believing
That he's gonna come round soon

I have always loved that scene with the cigarette in Expiation. As a former smoker, I know that feeling. There really isn't anything like that first drag when you haven't had one in a long time. Especially if you are very tense. Clare Holman carried it off so beautifully it made me wonder for a brief moment if she is that brilliant of an actress or merely a former smoker. I suspect the former.

Anyway, as much as I love Robson, I always thought it was odd Laura hung around so long. It wasn't completely in line with her character. So now she's off, leaving the Inspector behind. The song is Come Around Soon – Sara Bareilles