I Try

It had been almost two days and she hadn't responded to his text. In all of the years they'd been friends, she had never not responded to him. Usually it was within a few minutes, sometimes longer if she'd been at a scene or in the middle of an autopsy. But she'd never not responded.

For a moment, he wondered if he'd done something to upset her. As he opened the door, he discounted the thought. She had probably just been busy. Making his way to her office door, he knocked lightly. She looked up at him and the look was not what he expected.

"Am I catching you at a bad time?"

"Just busy, did you need something?"

Her tone seemed off. He thought about asking then decided it was best to let it go. "Just seeing if you had those results?"

She lifted a folder, "I just got it but haven't looked at it yet. I won't get to it for a couple of hours."

"If you want I could buy you lunch, you could tell me about it."

She shook her head, "No, thank you. I'll have someone drop it off for you."

Her head dropped, effectively ending the conversation. He stared at her for a moment, "Did you get my text?"

Without looking up, "I saw it, but I haven't had a chance to read it."

"OK, I guess I'll see you around."

She waited until she was sure he was gone before picking up her phone. In the rush of the last few days, she'd completely forgotten about his text. Scrolling through the messages in her phone, she found his and clicked it.

"Meet me tomorrow. I want to share something with you. I miss you. I miss everything about you. Please."

Anger flowed through her. Why did he have to do this? Why, just when she was making up her mind to get on with her life, did he have to do this?

Hitting the button to reply, she angrily typed. "I can't do lunch. Coffee and I will give you the results."

He pulled the device from his pocket and read her message. A small smile played across his lips, she wasn't mad at him, just busy. With a little extra bounce in his step, he headed to his car to meet James.

He'd gotten there early. Wanted to make sure he didn't keep her waiting. While her text had, at first, given him a sense of happiness, as he thought about it he couldn't help but feel some unease. She was always busy, but had never skipped the chance of a free meal. Now she'd done it twice. That combined with the lack of response had him reconsidering if he had done something to upset her.

He saw her across the patio and stood, waving at her. The smile she returned was tight and she was talking as she sat, all business.

She handed him the folder and started talking before she even sat down. "Prepare for the weird Robbie. Jeremy Swain's cause of death is a first for me in a homicide: starvation."

"Starvation?"

"And/or dehydration."

He sat back in his chair. "How long would that take?"

"Umm, they say three minutes without air, three days without water and three weeks without food. But it's a moveable feast, to coin a phrase. From his body weight and general health I am estimating he died between four to ten days ago. And he last ate at least two weeks ago, closer to three."

"That would fit with when he disappeared. But he can't have been in the ground that long. He must have been kept hidden somewhere, tied up and gagged. What about this missing finger?"

She handed him the papers. "Left hand, little finger, severed at the base of the proximal phalanx, after death."

Robbie grimaced. "Small mercies." Laura grabbed her bag and moved to leave. "There's something else if you've got five minutes.

Again, the strained smile before she nodded and settled in her chair. "Sure.

Robbie motioned to the server and pointed at his cup. He held up two fingers. He waited for the server expected she would fill the gap with conversation. Instead she sat in her chair, looking anywhere but at him.

"Laura, is there something the matter?"

She looked in his direction, but not at him. "No, why do you ask?"

"You just don't…I don't know, you seem different."

"Robbie, I'm very busy. You said you had something to talk about."

"Our Lyn is pregnant."

She paused, staring at him, with an expression he was unfamiliar with. Finally, she smiled, not a bright, brilliant smile but rather the colder smile she gave people she didn't really know. "That's great. I'm happy for you."

"You were the first person I wanted to tell."

"Is that why you stopped by the other day?"

"Yes, plus." He paused, trying to catch her eye. "I'm thinking about retirement. Move up north, be able to see my grandchild whenever."

She sat back in her chair, looking down at her hands. Finally, she looked up at him, smiling a smile that never really reached her eyes. "I think that's a brilliant idea, Robbie."

"You can't think of any reason I should stay here?"

"Not one that trumps your daughter and grandchild." The server chose that moment to bring their coffee. Laura waved her off, "I can't stay. Congratulations."

She was gone as he choked on words to try to make her stay. He wasn't sure what he'd expected her to say but it certainly wasn't this. She'd told him to go. Told him there was no reason for him to stay in Oxford. Dropping some money on the table, he stood to leave the café and found his steps suddenly very heavy. He couldn't imagine his life without her. But clearly she didn't have the same thoughts.

Games, changes and fears
When will they go from here
When will they stop
I believe that fate has brought us here
And we should be together babe
But we're not
I play it off, but I'm dreaming of you
And I'll keep my cool, but I'm fiendin'

I try to say goodbye and I choke
Try to walk away and I stumble
Though I try to hide it, it's clear
My world crumbles when you are not here
Goodbye and I choke
I try to walk away and I stumble
Though I try to hide it, it's clear
My world crumbles when you are not here

Ben Taylor - I Try. Macy Gray originally sang it but I used this version for Robbie.