So, I don't want to torture you any longer. Chapter 19 is up and hopefully you'll like it. Only Camteen in this chapter, no other characters involved :) Enjoy!

"Remy, stop lying to me. What the hell is going on?"

Before Remy was even able to say something, Allison was already on her feet, walking up and down at the end of her hospital bed.

"Ally, I just-"

"You just what? I thought we were done lying to each other. Why do you keep doing this to me?"

"Ally, I can't-"

"You can't what? You can't tell me? What are you protecting me from this time? Was the accident because of a tremor? Or the thing about your legs, what does that even mean?"

By now the blonde had walked to the side of Remy's bed again, looking at her furious but at the same time desperate.

"Ally-"

"I mean whatever it is, everyone seems to know, your dad knows, Cuddy knows, the nurses know. Yeah and earlier House walked past me and he smiled this sad smile at me, which means he knows too. I just-"

"ALLISON!" Remy had grabbed her at her wrist and almost screamed at her, well as far as possible in her condition, but still it was the loudest that the ER-doctor had hear her talk ever since she woke up.

"Would you please just stop and listen to me," Remy said, trying to keep calm but still talking loud, to make her companion listen to her. And she got what she wanted. Allison was listening to her. But now that she got her undivided attention, she was hesitant to continue.

"Since the accident," she began speaking quietly, "I can't feel my legs."

Allison was unable to move. She stood next to the bed and stared at the woman laying on it, not saying a word.

Slowly Remy let her hand fall from her wrist to her hand and softly caressed her knuckles.

"Oh my god…" It was only a whisper, not even directed to someone but the brunette still heard it.

"Allison," she tried to get her attention back.

"You mean, you…" She couldn't say it, couldn't let the words leave her mouth. Her girlfriend was paralyzed. Like it's not enough that she's going to die in about ten years, maybe more maybe less. Now she's paralyzed to. This can't be happening.

"We don't know yet. Look, they're working on it. Ally, there is still hope, just don't break down now okay? Please, I can't have you break down now."

"Okay," was all that Allison was able to say at that very moment.

When Remy saw her looking to the ground, she knew there was still something the woman needed to know.

"What is it?"

Cameron looked up at her, shocked that the brunette could analyze her that easy.

"Do they…do they know why?"

Thirteen gulped and met Cameron's eyes pleadingly. "They did some tests while you and my dad were out getting coffee. The trauma to the spinal cord…" She trailed off. She knew that she didn't have to explain any further.

"How bad is it?"

"The myleopathy to the lumbar and sacral regions was severe, with moderate inflammation. Cuddy put me on saline to reduce it, but the EKG results weren't good. She said with surgery, there's a small chance, but it's risky and…" she trailed off and bit her lip, straining to feel the legs she knew were there.

"No!"

Allison took her hand out of the brunette's and took a few steps back. Remy was startled to say the least. That was not the reaction she had expected.

"What do you mean Ally?"

"I mean no, you're not going to do this. Are you out of your mind? You could die during the surgery. This is not fun. This is either being able to walk again or dying. We could be happy, even if you weren't able to walk."

"Maybe you could, but I could not be happy that way. Never!"

"But why, we have us, isn't that enough?"

"I'm sorry Allison, but for me it's not. I can't do this. I want to be normal, at least as long as possible."

"And for that you're willing to risk your life?" Allison was outraged. How could Remy think like that?

"Yes," she simply answered. "I am. The Huntington's will affect us soon enough. I can't have people caring for me all my life. I can't live like that."

"God, this is just about your ego, you're too proud to let me help you. When will you learn that you have to lean on people sometimes?"

"I'm not even 30, I want to live what's left of my life and if there is a way that I can live it without a wheelchair then I'm definitely going to take that chance. Allison, I need to walk again," Remy exclaimed, desperation written all over her face.

"Remy, I can't…" Allison hesitated. She knew this was important for the younger woman but what if it turned out to be a mistake?

Remy noticed the change of mood in the air. The ER-doctor wasn't upset anymore. She looked sorrowful, tears building up in her sad green eyes, threatening to fall down every second.

"Honey, what's wrong?"

Slowly the blonde took a step forward to Remy's bed again, taking her hand in hers and immediately interlacing their fingers.

"I can't do this again, Rems, I can't lose you again."

"What do you mean again?"

"I thought you were dead, Remy. I thought you wouldn't make it and it nearly killed me. I can't live without you." By the end of the sentence Allison's voice was nothing more than a whisper anymore.

"Come here, honey," the brunette said, tapping the small place on the bed next to her. Not saying a word Allison lay down next to the auburn haired girl, facing her.

"I'm here, Allison. Everything's going to be okay. We'll make it through this. Together, okay?"

Tears were running down Allison's face as she nodded and lifted her hand to touch every inch of Remy's face. She brushed a strand of her rich brown hair out of her face and slowly let her shaking fingers trail over her cheek and down to the sweep of her jaw. All the while Remy's eyes never left hers. Brushing her fingers over her lover's lips, she finally leaned in and replaced her fingers with her own lips. It was not just a kiss. It was a promise, a promise to be there…no matter what.

So, at this point I have to say: Don't thank me, thank Vanamo for that chapter. We mailed over 4 hours now to make this happen. Ok, for her that's not a problem since it's not night in America like it is in Germany. Yes it is 1:30 a.m.! So anyway, thank you Vanamo for making this happen. I definitely owe you.