So, since I can't work all the time and my internet broke down which means I can't distract myself with reading or mailing with a certain someone (xD), I figured I could just write a little bit.

Oh and this will be my longest AN ever!!

Vanamo: Of course you were the 100th. I reserved it only for you ;) What did you think?

Pink Jover: God, it was so nice to have someone writing me German things. Thanks a lot and from now on Belgians are my favorite people ever ;)

flooj9235: Well I'm just that cruel. It was definitely on purpose.

Amazon Life: Well well, see who's talking ;) I will bring Cam to the OR but come on do you really think I'll end the suspense already? Think again ;)

So thanks for all your reviews, they keep me going :p

Carefully House led her back to her chair and sat her down on it. He held the cup of coffee he got for her earlier in front of her and when he got no reaction from her, he noticed that she spaced out again.

"Here," he said in a calm voice, trying not to startle her but still getting her attention.

She looked up at him with her sad green eyes, fear and pain written all over them. Just looking at her eyes made his heart ache. After starring at him for a while she glanced at the cup he was holding and hesitatingly took it in her right hand. She took a sip and then just stared into it for a few seconds.

At some point Allison was sure that this all was just a dream, that the last few weeks never happened. That they never broke up, that Remy never got into that accident, that Remy wasn't in the OR now, risking her life to be able to walk again, that Remy will be laying in her arms again this evening and she will watch her sleep peacefully. This just can't be happening. They were happy with each other, they were happy. They had all they needed and now everything might just end there.

Looking up at House again, who was still standing in front of her, just starring and waiting for her to finish her coffee, she knew that it wasn't a dream. The sympathy in his eyes, the forced smile he gave her. It wasn't a dream. Her girlfriend was in the operation room at the other end of the hall and might not come out of it alive.

Finishing her coffee as fast as possible, she held out her hand for House to help her up, which he did. She threw the cup into the next trash can and clung onto House's arm again for dear life. They went down the hall, not stopping again until they stood in front of the door to the room from which doctors were allowed to watch operations.

House didn't move, didn't open the door. He knew it wasn't his job to do, so he waited for Cameron to be sure and open it herself. Breathing in deeply once more, she took the handle of the door and slowly opened it, entering the room.

Walking to the glass front, she looked down at her girlfriend laying on her stomach, surgeons all around her with white masks covering their mouths and working on her open back. Not able to see the woman's face, she found herself looking at the monitor showing her regular heart beat.

Not moving an inch she kept staring at the monitor. After a few minutes she felt tears running down her face silently, followed by an arm on her shoulders. She realizes House has his right left arm wrapped around her shoulders, pulling her in his arms. Not even looking up at him, she rested her cheek against his left chest, still not taking her eyes off of the monitor representing Remy's heart, representing her life.

She took a deep breath and closed her eyes for a few seconds imagining how Remy would always hold her from behind and trail sweet kisses on her neck. How the brunette would wrap her arms around her waist, push up her shirt a little bit and caress her stomach. How she would hold her, as if she never ever wanted to let go of her. How her breath felt on her neck and how her hands on her exposed stomach brought chills upon her spine. God, how she wished Remy was holding her right now, telling her that everything will be fine, being the strong one for her. But Cameron knew that today she had to be the strong one.

Suddenly her thoughts were interrupted by an irritating sound. Opening her eyes, she brought her eyes back to the monitor again and noticed the flat line it showed. She saw the doctors running around her lover and Chase looking up at her, worry evident in his eyes.

After that her vision blurred. She felt arms wrap around her and a little later she felt her back touching cold material. And suddenly everything went black.

Beeeep.

"Cameron! Cameron!"

She wasn't sure if she was dreaming but she thought she heard someone calling her name. She wanted to open her eyes but her eyelids were too heavy. Instead she tried to focus on listening again.

"Cameron!"

Yes, by now she was sure someone was talking to her. Well rather trying to talk to her, since she felt as if she wasn't able to answer.

Beeeep.

But there was another sound. It was a disturbing sound. Actually it was more like a tone.

Beeeep.

She opened her eyes, hoping to find the source of the tone, squinting when the bright light hit her eyes. She saw House and Cuddy leaning over her, staring at her relieved. But there was still a hint of sadness in their eyes.

"Dr. Cameron, thank god," she heard Cuddy say.

"What happened?"

"You fainted. It was probably the shock combined with the alcohol that's still in your body," House told her professionally, trying to show no emotion at all.

"She has been drinking?" Cuddy looked up at him disbelievingly. "You forgot to mention that earlier."

And that's when it hit her.

"Remy," she said, pushing up her body with her arms but soon realized that she couldn't stand up without help. House immediately supported her and she looked through the window down at the doctors, who were still busy, trying to reanimate her girlfriend.

Beeeep.

She walked to the window and pressed her hands against it.

"No, Remy don't do this to me."

Slowly she felt her legs giving in again and slid down along the glass.

"Come on. Don't do this to me."

Softly punching the window she kneeled down as sobs began shaking her whole body.

"No," she whimpered again as she felt House's arms around her, pulling her into his sanctuary.

"You can't leave me now, you can't."

Beeeep.

"I don't know how to live without you," she whimpered desperately as if she believed that Remy could hear every word she said.

Slowly rocking her back and forth, House looked up at Cuddy as if trying to say 'Do something, for Christ's sake!'

"I don't know how to live without you."

Beeeep…

'Come on Thirteen, you're stronger than this. She needs you,' House addressed her in his mind.

AAAAAH the suspense again. No actually I wanted to write more, but I have an exam tomorrow (well when you read this it will be over since I can't upload this today) and I don't have time to continue it tomorrow either but I thought you'd be glad to have an update.