Author: JenniFromtheBlock
It's a hard thing to keep a secret from someone, especially when it is someone you love, and most especially when the secret is something exciting. It's natural to want to share the good stuff as soon as possible. Deciding the where and when and how to share can be the toughest part of all.
Meredith slid recklessly into the chair across from Owen, making it squeak as she plunked down her cup of coffee on the cafeteria table. He looked up from his paperwork in surprise.
"So what's your plan?" She asked, looking around to make sure they could talk without being overheard.
"My plan?"
"Mmmhmm. Your plan."
Owen chewed and swallowed. "Uh…I was thinking of finishing this sandwich and going back to my office." So much for my quick lunch, he thought.
"No! Your plan with Cristina. You know. The ring!" At the mention of his grandmother's ring, Owen's eyes darted round them to make sure Cristina was nowhere nearby. He leaned in to Meredith and whispered.
"I don't have a plan yet. And you need to control yourself because I'm not asking until I know we're both ready, so you had better not give it away."
"I know, I won't. But I'm excited."
"So am I," he answered, "but you pressuring me is freaking me out a little. Now I'm stressed that I won't give her that perfect moment you keep talking about."
"Yeah, speaking of that, don't do anything with hearts and flowers. Nothing Valentine-y. She's going to think that's corny. No rose petals and whatever."
"No hearts and flowers. Got it."
"And no stuffed animals. She'll hate that."
"So you're saying I shouldn't take her to a carnival to try to win her a giant teddy bear?" He asked innocently, with a grin. She made a face at him. "Don't worry. I know not to do stuffed animals. No stuffed animals, no giant bouquets, no proposal on the big screen at the ballpark, no banners from airplanes. I'm not an idiot."
"Okay, good."
"Thanks for your confidence in me, though."
Meredith sighed. "I'm sorry. It's just that now that I know, I want her to have that special moment that she never had before."
Owen cocked his head in curiosity but didn't say anything. He knew Cristina had been engaged, but wondered what was so wrong about the previous proposal that made it less than special. He wished he knew so that he could be sure not to repeat it.
Meredith tapped her fingers on the side of the coffee cup, thinking. "There is one other thing."
"What? Don't hide the ring in the dessert?"
"Oh, good God, don't do that. That's just ridiculous. And unsanitary."
"I was kidding."
"Oh," Meredith answered, shrugging. "Well, here's the thing. You have a ring, and you'll ask her, but she may not want to wear the ring. That doesn't mean she won't say yes. I think she will say yes. But the ring—we're not really ring kind of girls. That doesn't mean she doesn't love you, or she won't want to marry you. But we don't really do rings."
Owen sat back in his chair and frowned.
"It's just a symbol," Meredith continued. "It's not your love. It's a symbol of love. And she'll value what it means, but she may not want to wear it. It's nothing to do with you, specifically. I'm just warning you ahead of time, in case that happens. The not wanting the ring has nothing to do with the wanting to get married, so you shouldn't tie those things together permanently."
Owen nodded. "Okay. I mean, I won't lie and say I won't be a little disappointed. The ring did belong to my grandmother, after all. But I could live with it."
"You could live with what?" Cristina asked, plopping herself down in the chair next to Owen. She grabbed his bottle of water and took a sip.
"Uh, nothing," Meredith answered nervously, at the same time that Owen shoved the end of his sandwich in his mouth and mumbled unintelligibly. "Surgery. More hours in the OR. I could live with more surgeries," she added quickly, trying to cover for them.
Cristina's gaze flickered between Owen and Meredith. She wondered when she had last seen the two of them hanging out together. Possibly never. This was weird.
"Me, too," she agreed. "It's been slow lately. I'm so bored. Someone's artery needs to explode."
Meredith and Owen sat quietly, fidgeting, unable to think of a response. Cristina eyed them suspiciously. "Okay, what's going on?"
"Nothing," Owen and Meredith answered at the same time. They glanced at each other and quickly looked away nervously.
Cristina waved her finger between the two of them, pointing at one, and then the other. "You two were talking about something. Now you're being weird. What?"
Owen stood up, and grabbed his clipboard. "We were just chatting. I need to—I've got to…ummm." His voice trailed off as he leaned down to give Cristina a quick kiss. "Finish this paperwork," he continued, as if it just dawned on him. "I've got to go finish this. I'll see you later." He stepped back and walked off quickly, turning around once to give an exaggerated look towards Meredith over Cristina's shoulder, mentally imploring her to change the subject.
"Hey, do me a favor," Mer started, trying to distract Cristina. "Check on Lexie for me. It's her first day back; she's in the clinic, and I've already checked on her twice. I don't want to be the annoying older sister. And Bailey's got me in surgery this afternoon, anyway."
"Lexie's back?" Cristina asked, pushing the Owen-Meredith weirdness to the back of her mind for later consideration. "Are you sure that's a good idea?"
"No, but she wanted to. She said she was ready. It's the clinic, so nothing major yet. Just sutures and stuff like that. It might be good for her to start back slowly."
"I'll go in a bit." Cristina leaned in. "He's gone now. You can tell me what you were talking about."
"Who?"
"You and Owen. Are you being dense on purpose?"
"Oh. Nothing important."
"Because it seemed like you were hiding something."
Meredith looked around, scrambling to come up with a cover story. "Okay. I'll tell you. But don't tell him I told you."
Cristina nodded as if that were obvious.
"I told him not to get you any stuffed animals."
Cristina stared at her. "Stuffed animals?"
"Yeah, he said he was thinking he might get you one as a present, like a teddy bear, and I told him not to. I told him you would think it was stupid."
"It would be stupid." Cristina paused a moment. That's strange, she thought. That doesn't sound like him at all.
"That's what I said you would say," Meredith answered as her pager went off. She checked it, then stood to leave. "Bailey's paging me-gotta go scrub in. Check on Lexie, okay?"
"Yeah, on my way now," Cristina replied, watching Mer walk away.
Teddy bear? Owen would never give me a teddy bear, she thought. There's something odd going on here.
-ooo000ooo—
Jackson peeked around the doorway to the clinic and watched as Lexie stitched up a ten year old's elbow that had been mangled in a bike accident. She looks even cuter with brown hair again, he thought to himself.
"What are you doing?"
He backed out of the doorway and up against the wall quickly, feeling like he had been caught doing something wrong. He found himself facing Cristina.
"Nothing."
"There's a whole lot of nothing going on today," she muttered to herself. She peered through the doorway and saw Lexie working carefully. She turned back to discover Jackson again watching Lexie. He was completely unaware of the puppy dog grin on his face.
Cristina rolled her eyes and laughed at him with a low-pitched chuckle. He glanced down at her, and blushed, realizing that she had caught him and knew exactly what he was doing there.
"Seriously?" Cristina giggled. "Three?"
He looked back in at Lexie one more time, then back to Cristina. "What?"
"Just go in and talk to her. You can't keep sneaking around out here staring at her. It's like you're simultaneously avoiding and stalking her. It's creepy."
Jackson shook his head and made to leave. "No. I shouldn't."
"What are you going to do? Wait until you get drunk at a party and try to kiss her? Because that move doesn't work for you."
"Shut up."
"Look," Cristina said, grabbing Jackson's arm and turning him towards the clinic. "I'll give you an excuse. Mer told me to check on Lexie to make sure she's okay. You're now her babysitter. Go see how she's doing and report back to Meredith later. Okay?" She gave him a little shove toward the door.
He looked back at her. "Are you sure?"
"Yes. I've got something I need to do, and you can check on The Quicker Picker-Upper just as easily as I can. Mrs. Clean needs a friend. Go," she said, giving him a little push.
Jackson still hesitated, and looked back down the hall over Cristina's shoulder, as if searching for someone. She glanced up at him, and her expression softened.
"Alex isn't around. And he hasn't been around. He's…" she waved her hand vaguely. "He's got his own stuff to deal with." Jackson looked down at Cristina and she gave a little nod of encouragement. "Go," she repeated.
He nodded back and entered the clinic. Lexie glanced up, smiled, and gave him a little wave. He waved back shyly. Cristina turned away and walked towards the elevators.
He might be okay for a girl with her heart in her vagina. It's kind of like he's got a vagina of his own, anyway, she thought to herself as she entered the lift and pushed the button.
-ooo000ooo—
Alex caught up with Meredith in the hall as she headed towards the operating room.
"Hey, I need to talk to you," he said, walking in step with her.
"Right now? I'm scrubbing in with Bailey in a sec."
"Yeah, kind of right now." He stopped and took a deep breath. "I'm going to do something that might piss you off and I need to know if you're going to make me move out."
Meredith stopped and turned to him. "You don't need to move out. You always have a room in my house. Why would you need to move out?"
"I'm going to break up with Lexie."
"Oh." Meredith blinked, and they looked at each other for a moment. "Okay."
"Okay? What does that mean, okay?"
"It means okay. If you need to break up, you should break up."
Alex eyed her warily. "You're not mad? I thought you would be mad. I thought you would tell me to move out. She is your sister, after all."
Meredith nodded her head. "Yeah, she is my sister. But to be honest, I was kind of expecting it."
"You were?"
"Yeah. You two are not…I mean, you don't…I don't know." She lowered her voice. "You and Lexie are not you and Izzie."
Alex looked down at the ground and didn't say anything.
"That's part of it, isn't it? Izzie."
He looked back up, his eyes darting around like a cornered animal. "So anyway, I don't have to move out then? Because that would be a major pain in the ass on top of the physical therapy and everything else." Alex had just recently begun to process his feelings about Izzie, but he certainly wasn't ready for a conversation about her in the middle of the hallway.
Meredith considered, and then nodded. "No. As long as you and Lexie are okay with it, it's fine with me. You two are the ones who have to deal with each other."
"Good. Thanks," he answered, starting to walk away.
"Alex," Meredith called after him.
He stopped and turned around. She took a step towards him.
"Lexie is my sister, but you're also the closest thing I've got to a brother. There's always going to be a room in my house for you."
For a split second, he looked dumbfounded but quickly recovered his composure and changed into a practiced expression of nonchalance. "Yeah, okay, whatever," he said, trying to hide his emotions. "Don't get all sappy on me. Your pregnancy hormones are making you mushy. It's obnoxious."
He turned away quickly and walked off before she could see the relief on his face.
-ooo000ooo-
"McDreamy, I need you to do something for me," Cristina demanded as she barged into Derek's office.
"Come in," he replied ironically as he got up and closed the door behind her.
"You need to do me a favor." He raised an eyebrow and listened patiently. "Meredith and Owen are up to something. I want you to find out what it is."
He sat back down into the chair behind his desk. "This is what you want to cash in your I-saved-your-life favor on? Finding out why your boyfriend is acting weird? Why don't you just pass him a note in biology?"
"First of all, this is one of the many, many I-saved-your-life favors I will be cashing in on." Cristina plopped herself down in the chair in front of Derek. "Secondly, it also involves your wife. I tried to find out myself, but Meredith gave me some excuse about Owen giving me stuffed animals, and I don't buy it. Find out what's going on and tell me."
"And if I say no?"
Cristina sat back in the chair and narrowed her eyes. She was never one to back down from a challenge.
"Remember the good old days when I would show up at your house at 6:00 am and kick you out of bed with Meredith?"
"Yes," he replied warily.
"Owen took an early shift all next week to help out while so many people are on vacation. He'll be gone by four every morning. I'll be lonesome and bored. I'll need to be entertained. I wonder where I might find some company…" she said in exaggerated contemplation.
"You're kidding, right?" He asked in disbelief.
"Like I said, one of many, many favors I'll be cashing in on."
He took a sip of coffee and put it on the table. He liked a nice cup of coffee in the morning but preferably not one served at five in the morning by his wife's best friend in his own bed.
"Fine. You win. What did they say?"
"All I heard was Owen say he could live with something. 'I could live with it,' he said. What would he be talking about?"
"I don't know. Are you sure it has to do with you? The earth still rotates on its axis whether or not you have any say in the matter."
"Of course it was about me. Otherwise, there's no reason not to tell me. So will you find out?"
"I will work on it. I will not guarantee anything."
Cristina smiled and stood, her mission accomplished. She made to leave when Derek spoke once more.
"Dr. Yang, you do realize that at some point there will have to be a statute of limitations on the number of favors you get to redeem with me?"
She opened the door. "I know," she said. "But we can worry about that in a few years." She bounced into the hallway, the door slamming behind her.
"Godmother of my child," Derek muttered to himself, as he reached for his cell phone and dialed Owen's number.
-ooo000ooo-
"Alright already!" Mark yelled over the loud thumping as he quickly moved across the room to his front door. He swung it open to find Callie carrying a glass dish with two potholders, her foot still in the air preparing for another swift kick.
"You banged?" He said with a smirk.
"Move. This is hot," she replied. He backed up against the wall to let her pass to the kitchen, where she put the casserole dish down on the counter.
"What's that?"
"Hold on, there's more." She dropped the hot pads and ran back to her apartment. Mark went over and peeled back the foil to discover a sea of gooey cheesy goodness.
"Torres, I love your enchiladas," Mark called out to her as he carefully picked up a black olive from the garnish and popped it into his mouth.
Callie reappeared in his doorway, a pitcher of margaritas in one hand, a bowl of guacamole in the other, and a bag of chips tucked under her arm. She bumped the door with her hip to shut it behind her. "What? I couldn't hear you."
"I said I love your enchiladas," he repeated. "What's the occasion?"
"This," she said, waving her hand towards the food, "is a thank you."
"A thank you? For what?"
She pulled down two glasses from the cupboard and poured the margaritas. "For lots of things. For getting me McSteamy. For making me get dressed up and dragging my ass out of my apartment to Derek's party. For not letting me become crazy cat lady."
She handed him the drink. "This is my thank you." She clinked her glass with his, and took a sip.
"You didn't have to thank me," he said, handing her two plates. She expertly slid an enchilada onto each plate, and the smell of spicy sauce filled the air. "But I'm glad you did," he finished, taking his fork and digging in. He took a big bite and savored the taste of a rare home cooked meal.
"I know I didn't have to. But I wanted to. You have been listening to me go on and on about Arizona for months, and now that it's over, I wanted you to know how much I appreciate what a good friend you are."
"Now that it's over? Are you sure it's over for good? Because you did that whole break up and get back together thing for weeks."
She laughed. "Yes. It is definitely over. Arizona and I are done for good. And you supported me through the entire thing, from the moment I switched teams to when I blubbered snot all over your lab coat that day in the elevator when she and I broke up for the gazillionth time. And," she said, pointing at him with her fork for emphasis, before using it to scoop up another big bite, "you didn't even try to sleep with me."
He nodded. "That's true. I didn't. I thought about it, but I restrained myself. See? I'm maturing."
"You are. You're a good friend, Mark Sloane." Callie paused for a moment, considering. "In fact, I would say you are my best friend."
Mark stopped and looked up at her from his rapidly emptying plate. "Really? Your best friend?" He asked, surprised.
She smiled. "Mmmhmm."
Suddenly, he felt rather proud of himself. "Huh. Your best friend. Well, Torres, you are my best friend, as well. Even with the crazy cat lady thing going on." He smiled.
"Imagine that," she said, clinking her margarita glass against his.
"Imagine that," he repeated, smiling back at her and taking a drink.
-ooo000ooo-
Owen knocked on Derek's door, then opened it and leaned in. "Hey. What's up? You called?"
Derek waved him in.
"I'm in a tricky situation," he started. Owen sat down in the chair to listen. "Yang wants me to find out what's the big secret between you and Meredith."
Owen's eyes widened and his mouth dropped open in surprise.
"So apparently there is a secret. I thought Cristina was imagining things." Derek leaned forward. "You don't have to tell me anything. I told her I would ask, but I never said I would get an answer."
Owen rubbed his beard and sighed deeply. He leaned back in the chair. "I got a ring."
"A ring?"
"My grandmother's ring. I picked it up from my mother's house to give to Cristina. It's an engagement ring."
"You and Cristina are getting engaged?" Derek stood and came around the desk, offering his hand to Owen. "Congratulations! That's great!"
Owen smiled and shook his hand. "Thanks, except we're not engaged yet. I haven't asked her. That's the problem. I wanted to have the ring for when I was ready to ask her and when I thought she would be ready to say yes. Only Meredith found the ring first. So I know, and Meredith knows, and now you know. The only person who doesn't know about the ring is Cristina. And I'm worried she's going to find out about it before I can say anything or before we're ready. I don't want her to be angry-or worse, say no-because she's the last to know about it."
"Ah. I see," Derek answered, leaning against his desk. "And she's already sensing some sort of secret between you and Meredith."
"Uh huh. Meredith is very excited."
Derek laughed. "She can get excited about things. And you can read every emotion she has right on her face."
"Exactly. And don't get me wrong-I'm glad Meredith is excited. I'm glad she supports us being together, because to be honest, she hasn't always been my biggest fan."
"That's true, but that was in the past. She feels differently now."
Owen smiled, grateful for that change in his and Meredith's relationship. "Let me ask you something," Owen started. Derek nodded. "Did it bother you that Meredith didn't want to wear your engagement ring?"
Derek crossed his arms and thought for a moment. "I thought it would, but not really. She's her own person, and it didn't change the commitment we had to one another."
"Cristina may not want the ring."
"She may not. They're two peas in a twisted pod."
Owen nodded in agreement. He looked Derek in the eye. "Did she wear the ring before? With Burke?"
Derek shook his head. "No. But that was a whole different situation. Their relationship was not…your relationship with Cristina is in an entirely different place than when she was engaged before. Looking back, it's really not surprising that their relationship ended—it's the way that it ended that did the most damage. You can't leave a woman standing alone in a wedding gown in a church and expect her to come out of that unchanged."
Owen tried to control his expression and keep his face neutral, but inside he was bewildered and somewhat horrified. Every once in a while, a detail about Burke would slip out from Cristina or from a co-worker at the hospital, but Owen never fully realized that when Cristina told him that Burke left, it was literally at the altar in the church while she stood waiting in her wedding dress. No wonder why Cristina was so skittish about marriage, and why Meredith wanted it to be so perfect for her best friend. While he was happy that Cristina had already been freed of Burke when Owen met and fell in love with her, part of him was upset that Cristina had endured such pain. Part of him just wanted to hunt Burke down and kick his ass for hurting Cristina so badly.
"So," Derek continued, oblivious to what key information he had just revealed to Owen, "she may want to wear the ring, and she may not. It's up to you how you want to accept that."
Owen heaved another deep sigh. "Well, that's just a bit more pressure to live up to, isn't it?"
Derek nodded no. "No pressure. You'll ask, and she'll answer. And it will be the way it is supposed to be-which I'm sure will be yes," he added, smiling.
Owen returned his look with a nervous smile of his own. "Do you think you can buy me some time before Meredith spills the news?"
"I'll do my best. I really don't think she'll give anything away, though. She knows Cristina would much rather hear it come from you than from her."
Ah, yes, Owen thought. The big moment. But no pressure, he said to himself ironically.
"What are you going to tell Cristina when she comes back looking for information?"
"I don't know. Probably that I couldn't pry anything out of you. That she'll have to redeem her favors on something else in the future. I'm sure she can come up with something else to get me to do." Derek and Owen stood at the same time.
"I'm really happy for you," Derek said, as he embraced Owen in a big man hug. They slapped each other on the back and separated.
"Thanks," Owen answered.
"But you may want to do it soon. If Meredith knows and Cristina's already suspecting something, I don't know how long I can hold them off. I'm only one man," he laughed.
-ooo000ooo-
Cristina saw Owen and Derek hug through the window when she passed on the bridge. However, Teddy paged her to the OR before she had a chance to talk to either of the men. Now, late in the evening, Derek had already gone home and Cristina had changed back into her street clothes and was waiting in Owen's office for him to finish a few last details on his computer before they went back to their place.
She watched him as he concentrated intently, his brow furrowed. The hair at the back of his neck was getting long and starting to curl a tiny bit. He probably needed a haircut, but she didn't say anything; she liked when it got a little scruffy and mussed like that. She wondered if he was keeping a secret from her.
"Is there something you're not telling me?" She asked.
He looked at her, surprised, but said nothing. Then he turned back to the screen, closed out the windows, and pushed the button to shut it down. He swiveled back towards her.
"I mean, are you keeping some sort of secret from me? Because you and Meredith were acting weird today."
He watched her for a moment, and then decided that while this wasn't the right time for detail, he would be as honest with her as he could.
"Yes."
"Yes?"
"Yes."
She was momentarily startled by his honesty. "So why won't you tell me?"
He paused. "I will tell you. But not yet. Not now."
"Why not?"
"Because I'm not ready to tell you. But I will tell you. When I'm ready. I promise."
"Huh. I don't know if I like that."
"Would you rather I lie to you?"
"No."
"Then there is something that I am not telling you now, but that I will tell you when the time is right." He leaned forward and took her hands in his. "Can you accept that?"
"Do I have a choice?"
"Ummm….no. Not in this case."
She frowned.
"Cristina, it's a good thing. I think it's a good thing, a very good thing, and I think you will, too. I hope you will." He smiled at her and squeezed her hand. Suddenly, he thought of an idea. "I won't tell you, but you can ask me about it, if you want."
Her face lit up. "Really? Because I'll figure it out."
He laughed, knowing her fierce competitive streak. "You can ask yes or no questions. But I will not guarantee that I will answer or divulge anything specific."
"You have to answer."
"No, I don't. But I promise I won't lie. I will never lie to you. Not now, or ever," he said, leaning a little closer and giving her a light kiss.
"Don't distract me. I have questions."
"Okay. Shoot. Wait—no. We're putting a limit on these questions because I'm hungry and tired and I want to go home and crawl into bed with my hot girlfriend and a pizza."
"But it's twenty questions. That's how it's played. There are questions—twenty of them. Duh."
"Twenty? No. Way too many. We'll be here all night. Five questions?"
"That's not enough. You're keeping a secret. I get more than that."
"You're right," he conceded. "Ten questions. Final offer."
She agreed. Ten questions were better than nothing.
"Is the secret about me?"
"Yes."
"Is it about Meredith?"
"No. Well, maybe sort of. No, I guess not."
"What kind of answer is that?"
"That's that only answer you get. And that question counts, too. Seven left."
"Damn it." She would have to be more careful about how she phrased things.
"Is it about you?"
"Yes."
"Is it about teddy bears?"
He gave her a strange look. "Umm, no," he answered.
See, I was right. He knows better, she thought. "Good. Is it about the hospital?"
"No, not really." He sat back, kind of enjoying this. It was better than him trying to come up with a cover.
"Is it about Teddy?" Cristina frowned, a thought dawning on her. "She's not leaving, is she?"
"No. At least, as far as I know, she's not. I said it was a good thing. And that was two questions. You have two left."
She scowled at him, only realizing now how often she phrased things as questions that didn't need to be questions. She tried to think of some of the things they had recently discussed and if they might be something to do with his secret.
"Hurry up. Pizza is calling. Our bed wants us to come home and get into it."
"Don't rush me." Abruptly, a terrified look washed over her face. "It's not about my mother, is it?"
He laughed. "No. Believe me, I know better than to surprise you by springing your mother on you." She sighed in visible relief. "One question left, though. Make it a good one."
"Okay, okay. Is it…" She stopped, thinking about their recent exchanges. Suddenly her eyes got wide.
"Is it about Paris?"
He froze in a panic, hoping his face didn't given away how close to the truth she was. Their honeymoon destination wasn't a secret, but that was close enough to the engagement/marriage question to make his heart race faster.
"Do you want it to be about Paris?"
Yes, she thought immediately. Wait, what? I do?
"Hey, I'm asking the questions," she answered almost in a whisper.
"No," he replied quickly. "It's not about Paris." Technically a no, he thought, although awfully damn close-too damn close. But not close enough that he couldn't get away with a negative answer—thank God.
Cristina was surprised at the little tinge of disappointment she felt; Owen had said no awfully fast to that last question. Did I want the secret to be about our honeymoon? She thought to herself. I think maybe I did. What does that mean?
"That's it, ten questions." Owen got up quickly and turned away from her to gather his things. Or at least, so she thought. It was mostly so he could hide his face from hers, afraid that he would give too much away before he could compose himself. He puttered around the office a few minutes, sorting himself out. She sat quietly, watching him, lost in thought and having forgotten the immediacy of finding out the secret.
When he had gotten his things together, Owen turned back to Cristina. She stood in front of him and he marveled for just a second at how beautiful she was. He realized that one day, soon, if everything went as planned, she might agree to be his wife.
"I love you very much," he said.
She reached up and touched his cheek, and was amazed at the warmth and love she felt when he gazed at her the way he was looking at her right now. Whatever he planned to tell her, she could wait till the time was right.
"Let's go home," she said. She took his hand, and led him out of the office.
They say there is no cure for curiosity; when you know that there's something you don't know, you can't help but want to find out more. But with some secrets, it's the questions that just might tell more than the answers.